I’m really ticked. I just ran into a beloved little sister in the faith on my way to work when I stopped off at a grocery store to grab a few things. She and her family are nearly being eaten alive by the enemy. Honestly, we stood right there in plain sight near the vitamin aisle and ratted on the devil and shook the family tree for some fresh truth. As big tears rolled down those cheeks, she said one thing so emphatically that it seared straight into my bones:
“I was just thinking about you this morning, Beth. And I’ve just gotta know: have you been here?”
Where exactly did she mean by here? In that place where the enemy seems to leave NOTHING untouched. Nothing unmangled by his crushing iron jaw. The scene of the onslaught. Where Satan seems to systematically and patiently and daily and hourly go for you – heart, soul, and body, and for everything and everyone you hold dear, and for all you know – that you know – that you know you believe. That season where you can’t seem to recover because every time you start to get back up, something knocks you down again. That season that you really do begin to believe will absolutely kill you…and, in some respects, it does. It kills the old you. If allowed to, it stones to death the Goliath within every David, one welting throw after another. Welcome to the sifting zone where Satan gets so much leash that he rips to bloody shreds everything he can get his paws on…but what is really real. What is really left behind when we are stripped bare of all our earthly security and fleshly confidence.
Have I been there, my beloved little sister?
Let’s see. How loud can I say this?? I HAVE BEEN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOY, HAVE I EVER BEEN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And part of me survived. And part of me died.
And the part of me that died, as painful as it was, needed to.
And when it tries to resurrect it’s ugly, deformed, decayed head, I remind it that it is dead, lest it need another killing. Because I don’t want another killing.
I don’t mean my baffling tendency to sin is dead. I deal with that old nature everyday. I can still – almost out of nowhere – vacillate furiously between self-love and self loathing until I’m so dizzy I could regurgitate. But that joint victim and victimizer in me, that violent inner working nurtured at the breast of deceit and raised in sickness with a bent on self-destruction, took what still appears over many years to be a fair beheading.
YES. I have been there. And it was so awful I still well remember almost to the detail. And this morning I was glad I did because my little sister in the faith – a MIGHTY woman of God – needed to hear it.
I got in that car so mad at the enemy and at this brazen, hateful world that I made a bee-line straight to work and clicked the words “new post.”
Big sisters, our little sisters need some encouragement. They need to know we’ve been where they are. Even if they’re not in a season of hell on earth. Maybe their house just smells like one huge dirty diaper. Maybe they just need a nap. Maybe they need a job. God alone knows exactly and truly what they need from Him but this WE can know they need from us: encouragement! And, by God (and I mean that), we are going to give it to them.
Here’s what we’re going to do today. You who are 39 and under get to tell us where you could use some encouragement. You who are 40 and older and willing are going to give it to them. Here’s how it’s going to look:
If you are 39 or younger, you’re going to start your comment with “Your little sister here: …”
If you are 40 or older, you’re going to start your comment with “Your big sister here: …”
Here are the ground rules: (I’m going to warn you. When I’m furious, I can get into a bossy frame of mind and I’m there right this second. But, look at it this way. I’m beside myself in your behalf so humor me.)
Little sisters, don’t snow ball with every irritating, annoying, frustrating thing or relationship in your life. Get pretty quickly to the bottom line. I’m thinking about someone I really do love so much and want to encourage and help when at all possible but her emails to me are so long and about so many things going wrong and so many people going awry that by the end of it, all I can do is throw up my hands and say, “I am so overwhelmed, I have no idea where to begin!” Try, as much as you know how to tell us, to articulate what is really wrong. The real bottom line. Also, please look throughout the post for encouragements that may help you and keep in mind that what the big sisters write to one, they extend to all. Don’t be offended if no one speaks directly to you. Every encouragement is meant for every one of you.
Big Sisters, today is for encouraging our little sisters and that’s all. I know you have problems because I’m about your same age and I have a truckload of them. But you and I have lived long enough to know that we’re going to make it and that God IS going to be faithful and He is INDEED going to bring beauty from ashes and He will most certainly, given enough time, work every single detail out for our good and His glory. No complaining from us today. This post is a N0-Whine zone for big sisters. Life and the devil are eating our baby sisters alive. Let’s GET UP in their behalf, encourage them, and draw out our swords and fight for them. As often as you can, make your comment to all of them instead of just in reply to one of them. There will be exceptions, of course, but it’s crucial that we edify them across the board. They could all use it. You can talk to them or pray for them in your comment. Both are so Biblical and so right.
Now, listen, Little Sisters. One more thing from Big Sister with the big mouth. Get your tails in the Word. I mean it. Get your tails in the Word. NO TIME OFF. Read it aloud when you can’t absorb it or concentrate on it. Get yourself some accountability. Call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised and so shall you be saved from your enemies. Every morning.
One last thing. I left my beloved little sister with an assignment this morning and with the accountability to let me know she’s doing it. I’m going to give you little sisters who are feeling devoured the exact same one: memorize Psalm 25. Every word of it. Don’t tell me you can’t. Yes, you can. Get it printed out, laminate it, and memorize it. Say it over and over and over again. Start today. We can cheer you on and we can fight for you but we can’t fight instead of you. This victory is YOURS. The battle is meant to bring plunder directly to your personal life and family line or God wouldn’t have allowed it. Get up and fight.
Psalm 25.
I mean it.
I’m going to be asking you about it.
OK. I’m sorry for the bossy tone but I am so mad on behalf of you, our baby sisters, that I’m bruising this keyboard.
Now get busy, Girls. I have to be out of the office for a little while several times today so if we go a few hours without any comments moderated, have no fear, I’ll get back to it and get your encouragements posted.
I love you.
A little sister here (though just a few years shy of 40 myself)… yes, we have been in a very long season of Satan working to destroy our testimony, our faith, and about everything else that I can think of. Every single area of our lives has seemed to be under attack in the last 8 years. We are praying for a break through and for God to redeem all things. Please just pray for Satan to not win in our lives and for God to redeem and bring much fruit from these very hard years. We want to cooperate with him and not the enemy and to see good come from these challenges and difficulties. Thanks.
Little sister here: My husband loves the Lord but still struggles with lust which occasionally ends in pornography. I feel so broken. He is honest with me and is repentant but it’s a daily struggle and the enemy constantly throws lies at me to make me feel unlovely and humiliated and keep me from trusting. I’m trying to extend the grace that Christ showed me but I am so flawed and so hurt. I don’t know how to move forward.
Has anyone walked through this and have any advice? Please I’m searching for any biblical guidance. Thank you big sisters.
Little Sister here:
I’m 23 years old, and after dealing with Polycycstic Ovarian Syndrome since the age of seven (and massive weight gain because of it), I’m finally buckling down to deal with my issues with food, and to get this excess weight OFF! I’m a few days into a really restrictive diet and doing really well, but need to continue doing even better. More than anything I’m afraid to fail again, afraid that I’ll mess up and blow it again. But I need to do this once and for all. More than anything, I could just really use prayer from any of you Big Sisters who can relate, or even if you can’t. The enemy knows how deep these issues run, and how violently he can bring me down because of them, so I need the full armor of God up every second! Thank you so much, Beth, for opening this up – you can’t know how much I need the prayer and encouragement this weekend especially.
Little Sister Here:
I just celebrated my 31st birthday and I love this beautiful and crazy life God has given to me. I have been a mommy to a child with severe special needs for almost 14 years now. I have 2 other wonderful littles. The joy is incredible. My child also has had severe behavior difficulties especially at school for many years now. My husband proudly serves in the Army and we are prepping for his 5th deployment. We are in the midst of a battle for my son’s future. We believe in him and his potential and we adore him and the man that God intends him to be. We recognize his needs and the support that he needs to claim the future that is laid out for him. Unfortunately, this means that we are also in a battle with his school district for a private school placement. We are fighting against all odds… we have little money to pay for all the specialists and attorneys, we are 2 people fighting for the future of our family against teams of people and systems of beauracracy. I know my God is bigger than this and I cling to that hope. I need prayers for a miracle. I need prayers that God will be glorified as we seek his will for our life and our child. I really need reassurance that God sees me and he hears me and he he really can’t wait to pour his love and favor all over this family of mine.
Big Sister here….I don’t remember a day during a struggle that I didn’t have to continue to remind myself that whenever I can’t trace His Hand, I can always trust His Heart…sometimes I would have to remind myself of this ten times a day sometimes 50, and days come and days go…just keep trusting, keep trusting, keep trusting…He NEVER fails…TIS so SWEET to TRUST IN JESUS!
A little sister here… What do you do when you just dont know where you’re supposed to be? My husband is a pastor, has been off and on since he was 22 and I was 18… Now I’m 32 love God more than ever yet feel so unable to do anything in out church. We wonder why we’re there and yet don’t feel the freedom to leave. Tired
Oh, Siesta Mama, thank you! This little sister here needs to know that it is okay to feel like I am in a loveless marriage, even though I truly love my husband, and that it is ok to sometimes feel so frustrated with my 9 year old that I can scream. And any advice on how to get the love back… we’re going on 13 years and I’m really thinking we’re just stagnant.
I’ve been memorizing Psalm 119:129-135 as I’m going through Nehemiah. I’ll add Psalm 25 to my arsenal. Thank you for thinking of us! Looking forward to seeing you in Knoxville next month!
Little Sister here:
This year my father passed away. My parents divorced when I was three and I have not seen him since I was eight, I am 25 now. He remarried and moved 15 minutes away and has two other daughters. At the funeral, I met them for the first time. I am really struggling to understand why he had a relationship with them, but not with me. He was literally 15 minutes away. Why? He didn’t even tell his other children that he had other children (I have a younger brother). Confused, hurt, and angry.
little sister here,
I am concerned about my marriage, these past weeks my husband has been in great pain from a fusion the did by way of the front of his neck causing some issues for swallowing,breathing, etc. I had him in the ER two days after the surgery because he refused any liquids from me, but when someone came over to help me he would do it till they left. Last Thursday was so bad I had called the Church and said to our secretary, ” I can’t do this anymore,” She sent out the reserves Our Pastor. Who told him to Man up and take his medication.
My husband was in such great pain and refused to take his pain meds, was refusing every liquid item I had prepared From soup to smoothies and told me “They tasted bad” Can ya see were the straw struck this Camel? I got to the point were I told him ” I am not making you happy you need to leave” He stood his ground and refused. I am not sure where I am now,but that moment those words to him LEAVE I felt a sence of Resolve. The next few hours he started straightening up, and now here and there we have had a squabble,but for the most part I am ever wondering when I should file for divorce. I don’t want one but how can I continue on after the feeling of sheer release from bondage?
Big sister here – About a month ago my second divorce became final. I am not proud of that fact and am still trying to process it all. All situations are different and some are so hard and painful; but from the bottom of my heart I want to encourage you to give your marriage to God and trust Him with it. Also, give your heart over to God, and trust Him to protect it/you. He will NEVER leave you or forsake you, and you can hide in the shadow of His wing. Stand on His promises that are found in His word and He will give you the strength to endure and the freedom that only He can give! … ask Him to fill your heart with His love for the people in your life that are hard for you to love right now. I know why God hates divorce; I also know He does not hate me. I wish I could right now hug each and every one of you Little Sisters and pray with you … please know you are precious in His sight.
I am 37, Your little sister here: …
My husband who is bi-vocational pastor was recently let go at his job of five years. His pay from the church is not enough to provide for our blended family of eight (including my live-in mother).
Fortunately, I began working full time for a non-profit Christian organization in January (after beung a SAHM for 5 years), so we still have steady income. However, I worried and anxious about the future. I don’t feel like I am wired to be sole provider and it seems like my stay-at-home husband does not want to do anything but preach/pastor and I have to keep being the SAHM, Working Mom, Caretaker, Etc. I want remain respectful and be sensitive to my husband in his job loss, but it it is getting hard. I feel very tired and frustrated, but God is faithful! Thanks for the prayers and encouragement!
Big sister here… I want to encourage my little sisters who are not married and who are longing for that special relationship….please keep trusting the Lord… keep being patient he was so fulfill your desires if you let him.. the world is telling you that you are “less than” because it seems no one wants you… this is the truth …you are beautiful!!! you are both loved by God Almighty!!! Believe me I have heard all these things and rolled my eyes at them and not appreciated these Words… but they are solid gold… I am sending you a cyber hug. <3
i am 39!!!! will be 40 in 5 weeks. i am tired of being the little sister in need. my marriage stinks. i asked my husband of 15 years to move out and he told me he’s looking for a place. no, he’s not fighting for me. he’s not fighting to repair the damage he’s done through porn and other women. not taking back the hurtful thoughtless things he’s said. he’s says he didn’t mean to. then leaves it at that. i’m tired of feeling ugly and i’m tired of gaining weight. 110 lbs. in 15 years because i’ve thought that i was not enough and i comforted myself with food i guess. taken up his unhealthy eating habits. i’m tired i want out but i want him to fight for me. he’s not. oh and we have 3 kids. don’t want them to become statistics.
Your big sister here ~
I am 56 years old divorced with no children. When I think of the life I led without God, I literally tremble.
Oh, that I could copy every word of advice written here today and put it in my heart. And I can. And you can my little sisters. One simple thing. Stay.In.The.Word. Read it, learn it, keep it in your heart, take its very core into your soul, saturate your life with every truth, every word He breathed into the writer’s pen. It is the answer to every question, every indecision, every anxiety, what if’s, oh no’s, and cry for help. The answer is in the words that your fingers brush over as you read it.You may not understand it right away. But the Holy Spirit will show you.
The most important thing to do with His word is the thing that causes us all to cringe, hesitate and just downright say no sometimes. OBEY. Now don’t doubt sisters, that God is indeed in charge of this world. But if we dont’ let him have control, our lives become a constant struggle, never quite sure if we’re making right decisions. Because we don’t go to the One who knows us and already has a plan for our lives. But,oh dear ones, when God is in control, the good stuff comes flowing like a mighty river. Peace, joy, contentment, courage, goodness,security, love. Oh the love… we just have no idea…
“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him”–
I Corinthians 2:9
Stay in His word. Every day. See what He wants to do and He will do in your life.
Big sister here –
Two portions of scripture that have changed my life and are of great encouragement:
“He (Abraham) staggered not at the promises of God through unbelief, but was strong in faith, giving glory to God; and being fully persuaded, that what he had promised, he was able also to perform.” Romans 4:20-21
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
Fight the good fight sisters!!! Game on!!!
Big sister here, sending love to all you precious little sisters. I just want you all to know that, in my almost-52 years on earth, I have been through college struggles, marriage ups & downs (including one season where Satan came at us with claws and fangs bared, and our marriage was hanging on for dear life), one miscarriage and the births of 4 darling girls, new mommy struggles, fatigue, isolation, frustration, potty training, home schooling, job loss (my husband’s – 3 times!), stress, stress, and more stress, teenagers, driver’s ed (did I mention stress?), husband going through nursing school, a prodigal child who left home for 2 years, going back to college and back to work, and now semi-empty nest, and a PRECIOUS new granddaughter who was born out of wedlock. So, yes, dear ones, chances are whatever you’re going through, I HAVE BEEN THERE! And I can tell you with absolute certainty that God is FAITHFUL and when we go through difficult times it is for a season and a reason – He wants to draw us closer to Him and conform us to the image of His dear Son. He wants to teach us to surrender whatever “control” we think we have and trust Him. You’ve probably heard the saying, “When you can’t see God’s hand, trust His heart.” That is so true. I don’t always understand the “why” of what I’m going through, and some answers I may never know this side of heaven. But even in the darkest of times, you can cling to the hand of your Father and know, without a doubt, that His tender heart of love will never allow anything that He will not ultimately use for your good. His strength is perfect when your strength is gone. He promises to give you wisdom when you ask for it. The same voice that calmed the wind and waves can calm your own heart today. Beth is SO right – stay IN THE WORD! Life is a spiritual battle, and you can’t fight unarmed. Be comforted and encouraged, dear little sisters, that you are not alone.
Big Sister, Terre, here. My prayers are going up as fast as Mama Beth’s and my other bigs. We stand against all the wiles of the enemy and claim God’s victory in ALL circumstances. Praying Jer. 33:3 for each and every one of you littles. We can encourage you only because we have all been there at one time or another. Keep prayin’, keep readin’ the Word, keep the faith. God is real and ready to answer prayers big time! Look out!!
Big Sister Here…
GOD is faithful and HE always has the best interest of HIS Girls at Heart! Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us to Trust with ALL our Hearts, Don’t lean on our understanding, Look to God for everything and He will direct and show us what to do.
GOD is no respector of persons – As you read these testimonies from the “BIG SISTERS” believe for yourself and release your faith over your situation.
You are NOT alone!
You will make it!
You are an overcomer!!
JESUS said so…and HE don’t lie 🙂
Your little sister here: I have been in a process of healing from some horrific sexual abuse when I was a little girl. God has done a lot of work in me as I have chosen to follow Him and allowed Him to heal me step by step…it’s definitely been a several year process though, many of them resisting God because I didn’t trust Him. I still occasionally struggle with self-harm and really have been struggling with unforgiveness. I believe that my healing (and my journey toward freedom from what happened) has stalled in a way because of my unforgiveness, but I still have so much hate and anger toward those who hurt me. I don’t know if I will ever be able to forgive them. It still hurts so much and I am angry about all that was stolen from me. In just a couple weeks I am supposed to be headed to India to help at a home for girls who have been rescued from death as infants, being abandoned by their families, or even from being temple girls. I am afraid that I am going to get in the way of what God is wanting to do in the lives of those girls through me while I am there.
little sister to little sis… i am with you in this season this is a song by tenth avenue north” feel live I’ve been losin ” cause forgiveness only hurt us… Beloved i Know the childhood abuse can do to you I know the feeling but unforgiving only hurt us. please know that what i am telling you right now is the same thing that my therapist told me last week. I know it is the truth but I am fighting with unforgiven also and please read the lycis to the second song by matthew west strong enough they both help me.
I can’t believe what she said
I can’t believe what he did
Oh, don’t they know it’s wrong?
Don’t they know it’s wrong?
Well maybe there’s something I missed
But how could they treat me like this?
It’s wearing out my heart
The way they disregard
This is love. This is hate.
We all have a choice to make
Oh, Father won’t You forgive them?
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’ (oh no)
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’
It’s only the dead that can live
But still I wrestle with this
To lose the pain that’s mine
Seventy times seven times
Lord it doesn’t feel right
For me to turn a blind eye
But I guess it’s not that much
When I think of what You’ve done.
This is love. This is hate.
We’ve got a choice to make
Oh, Father, won’t You forgive them?
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’ (oh no)
Why do we think that hate’s gonna change their heart?
We’re up in arms over wars that don’t need to be fought
But pride won’t let us lay our weapons on the ground
We build our bridges up, but just to burn them down
We think pain is owed apologies and them it’ll stop
But truth be told it doesn’t matter if they’re sorry or not
Freedom comes when we surrender to the sound
Of Mercy and Your Grace, Father, send Your angels down (singin’)
Oh, Father, won’t you forgive them?
They don’t know what they’ve been doing (oh, no)
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losing
I feel like I’ve been losing
Oh Father won’t you forgive them
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’
I feel like I’ve been losing
Oh, Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin
Strong Enough – Matthew west
You must You must think I’m strong To give me what I’m going through
Well, forgive me Forgive me if I’m wrong But this looks like more than I can do On my own
I know I’m not strong enough to be everything that I’m supposed to be I give up I’m not strong enough Hands of mercy won’t you cover me Lord right now I’m asking you to be Strong enough Strong enough For the both of us
Well, maybe Maybe that’s the point To reach the point of giving up
Cause when I’m finally Finally at rock bottom Well, that’s when I start looking up And reaching out
I know I’m not strong enough to be Everything that I’m supposed to be I give up I’m not stong enough Hands of mercy won’t you cover me Lord right now I’m asking you to be Strong enough Strong enough
Cause I’m broken Down to nothing But I’m still holding on to the one thing You are God and you are strong When I am weak
I can do all things Through Christ who gives me strength And I don’t have to be Strong enough Strong enough
I can do all things Through Christ who gives me strength And I don’t have to be Strong enough Strong enough
Oh, yeah
I know I’m not strong enough to be Everything that I’m supposed to be I give up I’m not strong enough Hands of mercy won’t you cover me Lord right now I’m asking you to be Strong enough Strong enough Strong enough
Love you beloved sister
Thank you Rebecca. I have actually been hearing the song “Losing” on the radio almost every time I am in my car…also the one “Forgiveness” by Matthew West. I know that I am the one that is being hurt by unforgiveness. I have been told the same thing by some ladies at church and my therapist too…heck, she actually wrote a book called “Forgiveness: An Invitation To Heal”, and I’ve read it…maybe I need to read it again though, it’s been a long time.
The process of actually forgiving has been such a process for me though. A lady at church that has been meeting with me this summer said something to me one day that has been weighing on my mind. She said that she believes that before forgiveness can occur, you have to take an account of all that was hurt, stolen, damaged, etc. That it’s part of the forgiveness process, and when we know (and acknowledge) the cost, then we know more the price that was paid on the cross. I have been doing more acknowledging of the cost rather than my usual avoiding and denying my emotions and losses like I used to do. And I am understanding more what Christ really did on the cross, the magnitude of it. I feel God drawing me closer and closer to the step of forgiveness, I just don’t know how to do that when there is still so much hate and anger. I do hold on to the lyrics of the song “Losing”, cause I definitely relate to it.
I’ll be praying for you in this season as well sweet sister.
Little sister here. The week we were set to move into our first house last March, we found out my husband would be losing his teaching job at the end of the school year. It’s now July, and he’s had no offers despite applying to at least 100 teaching jobs. I’m grateful to have a full-time job right now, but I’m so worried about having enough money to pay our mortgage, take care of our infant daughter, and put food on the table. I know that God provides (I’ve seen it time and again), but sometimes my faith in that is so weak.
Little sister here…my husband is a youth/associate pastor of a church that is struggling. I know he feels led to be a senior pastor but we don’t know if he should be seeking other churches or just wait for God to make the first move. We love our church and hate what is happening but unfortunately our problems are due to the senior pastor so it feels like my husbands hands are tied 🙁
Little sister here: After reading so many of these posts, I’m starting to feel that my “problems” seem so insignificant compared to others. But I know that my thoughts/feelings/problems are just as important to God.
I have a couple of things that are on my mind.. first, about a month ago, I had terrible sharp pains when taking deep breaths. The dr ordered a chest x-ray and some “scarring” appeared on the image. There’s no reason I should have scarring on my lung. Follow up visit and x-ray showed no improvement, even though my symptoms have subsided. I’m scheduled for a chest CT on Tuesday and an appt with a pulmonary dr on Thursday. What concerns me most is that last year, we lost my grandmother to a lung disorder that there really isn’t much information out there to learn. We don’t know if it’s hereditary or not. So, I could use a prayer that whatever showed up on the x-ray last month will be gone when I have the chest CT next week.
And what makes this issue a little tougher to handle is that I’m feeling a little alone. I never thought I’d be almost 38 and still single. I know my family and friends love me, but this longing for marriage/kids is so hard sometimes. I have been in a serious relationship for more than a year, but sometimes I worry that he’s content with dating and I’m not confident that marriage is on his radar.
I’m so thankful I read this blog entry today. Psalm 25 is an amazing little message and I’ve been so encouraged reading the interaction between women today.
Little Sister Here…
I am 23 and I have had chronic headaches and neck pain for the past year and a half due to a snowboarding accident I was in. I have been seeing many doctors over the past year, and none of them can find a solution to help with the pain or healing. I am preparing to go to the mission field in September for a year, and am praying for healing especially before I go.
When I am in a lot of pain, the enemy truly harasses me more and more. He certainly doesn’t mind kicking you when you’re down. I am needing encouragement to help me get through this season of physical pain. Please let me know if you have found ways to battle with the enemy when in pain, and/or ways to help you persevere through it! Thanks so much :]
You little sis,
Melissa
Little Sister here:
Such a long story, but to sum it up, my husband’s job is seriously in jeopardy because of a micro-managing upper level manager. He could lose his job anyday. We just relocated our family 800 miles from family and 1600 miles from our previous city where all of our friends are for this job. Living there was all our son had ever known.
However, a contact for a new job “fell in his lap” a couple of weeks ago. Hmm…coincidence? I think not.
We are also parents of a 4 year old VERY strong willed son who is exhibiting some disturbing behavior especially since we moved. He misses his friends and is out of his comfort zone here.
Our marriage has been tested under this pressure too. We just committed this week to go through the study LOVE & RESPECT together. I know Satan doesn’t like this and will try to stop it. I can already see it.
Because my husband is trying to hang onto his job, he is working more than ever, so I’m at home ALL the time with very few outlets. We have found a wonderful church and are making friends, but it is a slow process.
Please pray for the strength of our family to withstand this trial and to know that we see only in part but God sees the whole picture. Everything is for our ultimate good (Rom 8:28), but it sure doesn’t feel like it now…
Big sister here…. I feel completely inept at this moment, but all I know is that when I do not know what to do, or can’t even put a prayer together in my head for the life of me, I sing (out loud)Jesus Loves Me over and over till because I know it is true but at times that is what I need to hear till it covers all that seems to be engulfing me at the moment.
I also realistically would like to think I am clinging to Jesus especially in times of despair, which I am but truthfully I don;t even trust myself to really be capable at times as doubt and fear set in…so the verse that really just brings me such comfort is
Psalm 37:24, When he falls he will not be hurled headlong, for the LORD is the One holding his hand.
That is the real truth…my Father in heaven, ….Little Sister, your Father in heaven is holding onto you and he will not let go…EVER!
Much love to you all…
michelle in VT
Big Sister here – sending prayers out to the Little Sisters
Little Sister here: I need prayer! Its hard to
trust God financially, marriage, ministry.
I need to hear from God and see clearly what
He wants in my life. 🙁 my heart is hurting
Hey Big and Little sisters,
Your fellow little sister is tired. The enemy is hard at work in my thought life and as Beth said I feel as though I am constantly vacillating between pride and self hate. God is slowly teaching me how loved I am by him. He is so patient. In a few months I am taking a huge leap. I’m moving for Jesus and I’m scared. Scared to leave all that I know and yet much more terrified not to do it. I know that I know. I hear God’s voice so clearly in this matter. What I’m really struggling with is leaving my spiritual and physical family. My father has cancer…the “what if’s” seem to bombard me…but I stuff them down. I hide from everyone, even God. Through out this season God has taught me how much prayer matters..so to all my sisters out there, pray. Get in a closet, get in a car, get somewhere and PRAY. It is so humbling and wonderful that Jesus even understands our groans.
Your little sister here has been struggling with some chronic health issues for about three years with no answers. I have had a few surgeries and no relief and I keep getting more and more health issues. I am 29 years old and I get very weary most days that I will have to live this way until I die (whenever that shall be). It makes me not want to have kids because I fear I won’t be able to care for them without pain/struggle. I feel like I am alone in all of this and that no one really understands. My husband, friends, and family are all wonderful, but I feel so alone!!! I keep praying that Jesus heals me! Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement big sisters!!!
Your little sister,
Ashlie
Little sister here. My husband and I were very strong, solid Christians for years but about 3 years ago our life became one problem after another and it has affected our faith greatly. We know the word, read it daily and believe every ounce of it but when you have no good things coming your way for years and no promising horizons even Gods word feels trite. Even our pastors preaching, which use to speak to us so strongly, now feels pointless and simplistic. To a degree we have become bitter and jaded (though still loving the Lord with all our hearts). We just feel alone.
All and all I am feeling what I know is a lie but can not escape it: that God has left us high and dry to fend for ourselves. I do not hear from Him, do not feel the Holy Soirits presence, have no direction and do not feel that He loves me. Again, I know this is a lie….. But the feelings never cease.
Big sister here. First, FIND SOMEONE TO BE ACCOUNTABLE TO! If no one knows what’s going on with you, how can we help? Second, CLING TO HIS WORD! He PROMISES, and He never, ever does not come through. I would encourage you to journal, also; write down what you’re going through, what your struggles are, what financial walls you’re against – and then your praises. Whatever He has done for you.
I went through a really difficult time our firs two years of marriage. I was my husband’s third wife (his first since becoming a Christian!), and he was my first (only!) husband. He was ready to be an “old married couple” right away! It didn’t help that he’s 20 years older than I, either. We were losing our retail store, and God was working at that thing Beth talked about, killing off that part of me that needed to die. Oh, it was so painful. But He gave me a song to absolutely hold on to – GOD WILL MAKE A WAY – and one I had to sing or play until I absolutely MEANT it, I CAST ALL MY CARES UPON YOU.
He is GOOD. Faithful? I cannot tell you how much! Does it ever become a bed of roses? Not when I’m not looking at His face, it doesn’t. When my focus is where it’s supposed to be, all else falls into perspective; I can’t SEE it because He covers it. 🙂
If any of my little sisters is in the Nashville, TN, area and needs a hug and an ear, please let me know. I’ll be glad to be His arms. 🙂 HE LOVES YOU!!!!
Hey! Big Sis here!!!
There is a great advantage to being over that sixth decade and that is experience!!! Man, I have had a rich life of experiences!!! Everything from profound depressions to raising special needs kids to being betrayed and even jailed by family members who actually put the dys in dysfunctional!!!! Throw in alittle substance abuse and domestic violence and mental health issues, oh, and caring for aged parents guess that pretty much sums it up!!! Anyway, I gotta tell you just like a buncha other gals already did, You CAN NOT make it without making time for God EVERY DAY!! You must start your day in God’s Word and end your day with it. Being girded with His Word is your main tool for fighting off the enemy. When Satan harrasses us we need to use the Word on him and he will leave. he can not fight against God’s Word!!! Remember when Jesus was tempted what did he use to fight Satan?? The Word!!! That was the one thing that drove the enemy off. Believe God’s promises NOT Satans lies!
When I get angry at Satan I just visualize myself kicking him till he rolls like a rotten snake in a corner completely whipped. Using God’s name against him.
I have never known God to be off in His timing either!!! Usually we are an impatient bunch and He really wants to teach us patience. Alot of times I feel I know how He needs to act and when and later I realize that if He would have acted on my time frame, it would have been a complete disaster.
All those things we encounter in life are conditioning and training so when we see Jesus we will be able to say every thing we went through in life was SOOOO WORTH IT!!!
Trials keep us from falling too deeply in love with this world.
So little sisters, keep looking up to Jesus, in His Word and have an eye out for others and life will pass along and all these trials will be a distant memory.
Love you all and Keep the Faith!
Betty M from ND
Little sister here…I have a very difficult child, who we are trying so hard to raise to love the Lord, and some days, I just want to throw my hands up and surrender. I ask God for wisdom, and a lot of times I find that I still don’t know how to handle her. It’s very discouraging because I love my child and I know what a blessing she is, but I don’t know what to do with her.
Little sister here-
The question asked, have you been there? Is one that I have wanted to ask for some time now. In the past year and a half I have been diagnosed with endometriosis, encouraged to have children and now experienced two miscarriages. I have seen an RE dr and there is no apparent reason for our losses. We are waiting, hoping, and trusting to be parents but it continues to seem as though it is one thing after another knocking me down. I am struggling to not feel constant disappointment, hopelessness, and defeat. I feel overwhelmed with what is required for us to “try” and constantly feel like I am consumed with it all. I hate how it affects me all the time and am desperately trying to hold on to truths …please tell me someone has made it through!
Big sister here. . .Thank you, Beth, for giving us this challenge and opportunity to pray for each other. We are all/have all been through challenges, and reading through the comments has impressed me how we need to ask for prayer and we need to PRAY! Lord, help us to know how we can help our sisters, show us what to do. Thank you for this chance to pray for sisters we don’t know. Thank you, Beth, for listening to God and doing His work. Lord, help us to do the same. Amen.
Big sister here. Stay in the Word little sisters! “For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.” (Romans 15:4 NIV)
Love to All
Your little sister here. Two things.
1. My life is going really well right now, and I praise Him for it, but good periods in my life have traditionally not lasted long. I am constantly waiting for the bottom to fall out. It is almost like I don’t know how to function in the good peaceful times. Anybody else deal with that?
2. I have a past, and long is the list of people who know about it. The problem is I have moved on, and God knows I have moved on, but I am afraid other people (who don’t know me, just about me) are going to forever see me as who I was and not who I am now and who I am becoming.
Encouragement from a Big Sister—–Lil sisters take back the ground you giving up. You are in battle and you are not fighting alone. To believe otherwise is an outright lie!! Our God is strong. He is mighty to save. Wield this Word—Do not gloat over me oh my enemy though I have fallen I will rise! Rise up oh generation who has awakened the Church to God’s call for justice and mercy among the nations!! The attack is to keep you down but you must put on the armor and fulfill the calling of this age. Let’s take the gospel to the world and see the Lord’s return in our day. In this world you will have many troubles but Jesus overcame the world. All this suffering is going to result in an eternal weight of glory beyond all our imaginations. The big sisters will help you, pray for you, hold you—please be willing to ask us!!
Big sister here…Thank you little sisters for your transparent hearts and Beth for putting your anger and frustration into action. At 51 years old it is much easier to look back and see how God weaved all the trials and temptations into good but at the time they made absolutely no sense. What gets me through is the knowledge that our God is good by His very nature and in spite of whatever is going on in my life He has my heart in his hand. Long ago I memorized Proverbs 3:5 and have been clinging to its truth ever since. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” Translated for me that means when life is unsure or out of control…when my mind wanders to the worst case scenario and I recite entire conversations before they have (or will) ever happen, when my mind won’t shut off the fear…I repeat this phrase over and over, “Lord, I trust you with my heart.” That reminds me that even if the worst case scenario does happen, I can still trust our good God with my heart. He has never failed me yet.
And to you little sisters who need the physical reassurance I pray a big sister hears your cry and comes along side you. I have determined to find a little sister or two to take to coffee this week.
Don’t give up, relief is just around the corner. Hang in there!
Big sister here… To all the beautiful women, we hear your hearts. As women we have many experiences. I, personally divorced my husband, remarried him, took care of my ailing parents, raised my children while working full-time and have walked in the dark countless times. I was glad to hear from Beth. We are here on this earth to unite and fight for Christ’s chosen people. We are in a spiritual battle and as we comment we must pray. So with that, unite with me in prayer for all women young and old.
O, Lord, you are mighty. You are calling us to fight when there is no light. Guide us as we look upon You. These young women need to know that we have faced similar situations. Life isn’t easy and rarely is it fair. But You are sufficient. You make us strong when we are weak. Align all of us to Your will and lift those that are weak. Help those of us that are older to guide and mentor Tour sheep. You are all we need, You will is sufficient for us today. We need a Savior. Be ours! In Jesus name, AMEN
Little sister here… I am a mom of 4 (10 down to 2) who is overwhelmed. Between years of deployments, moves, and not getting much of a break, I am reaping the fruit of raising my children in anger and a controlling environment. The stronger my desire to raise a godly family, the more I seem to mess it up. My oldest are at the age where I see my sin lived out in them in living color and their hearts getting harder. I have a wonderful godly husband but they spend most of their time with me. I need to know that there is hope for me and that I haven’t messed this parenting thing up for good.
There is hope!!!!! We lived overseas for a few years and we have older children (in their 20’s) and two adopted children (age 7) as well. Living overseas is SUPER DUPER hard my friend!!!! I found myself being controlling on their every.single.move and that I needed my home to be in perfect order and clean at all times. What is up with that??? lol It is because we can’t control anything living in a foreign country….we can’t control having friends….buying food easily…speaking to people with ease. EVERYTHING about it is so hard! And I found myself taking out my frustrations by picking on the little ones. Two things 1) By adopting, I had a realization on how many things I did that were harmful with our older children..it was like getting a second chance. I am a much better mom this time around BUT….BUT…..I still make mistakes…lots of them! 2)There is no better way for our children to see forgiveness at it’s finest. When I mess up…I tell them I’m sorry and ask them to forgive me. They see that I am real. Also, try not to be so hard on yourself. Life is tough sweet sister without a support system, I’m certain you feel on your own most of the time. Cut yourself some slack and each day is a NEW DAY! Also…our children have the capability of making their own choices…even without our bad influence (wink wink) They are born with sin…remember? PLEASE don’t feel alone in this area….so many moms feel this way. The fact that you even acknowledge that you could “do better” …well..that just says the world about you my friend:) I’m praying for you!!!!!!
Thank you so much, Kimberley, for taking the time to respond and encourage AND for your prayers. It’s funny you mentioned adoption… I have often thought that there is no way I could adopt b/c I couldn’t heap more ‘junk’ (from my parenting patterns) on children who are already starting off hurting in some way. I am so glad that you are experiencing a ‘do over’ and finding joy in it!
I found myself harping on my daughter’s poor attitude last night and realized in the middle of the conversation that I was expecting her to ‘fix her attitude’ without the Holy Spirit in much the same way I try to ‘fix’ my parenting on my own strength!
I know that God is a God of redemption and restoration… it’s just hard to remember that truth in the midst of so much junk when I can’t see Him redeeming and restoring. I will press on. Thank you again for taking the time to encourage me with your sweet heart!
Little sister here. I caught my husband watching porn about 5 years ago and I’m still having a hard time forgiving him. We’ve been together about 10 years with a couple children. How can I forgive him and move on? Whenever I think about him doing that I feel sick and angry.
Alyssa I am so sorry for your pain!
My 1st husband did the same thing to me & much more.
With that I chose it was ok with leaving with my 5 and 8 yr.old boys…did that out of trusting self. Now as I am older, maybe a wee bit wiser, I do not think I should have gone so quickly.
GOD is bigger than All sin, all pain and HE is able to forgive. Ask GOD for a greater love for your husband, ask your husband to get counselling together.
Our problem is that we think that pornography is a worse sin than lying, GOD sees all sin as sin- He does not rate them.
PLEASE Believe your family is more important together intact, whole and your children need an active present dad.
Forgiveness does NOT mean accepting – your husband did wrong for sure! But don’t let the enemy fool you to believe unforgiveness is ok… GOD says we must! He did not say it would be easy, but HE is Able to give you a heart that is full of His Spirit to love and forgive – our part to choose to let GOD be GOD.
I do not know you, we will probably never meet…but do know it will ease as you trust GOD to give you a new heart towards your husband, and a renewed love for him too.
Give those “Ugly” feelings to GOD and ask HIM to deal directly with them in truth…they will fade – they can not stay in heart submitted to GOD.
GOD LOVES YOU -Alyssa!
Big sister here read Einstein’s quote today, “Example isn’t another way to teach, it’s the only way.” These posts are great encouragement. Find at least one mentor/prayer warrior to teach you personally. Start each day in His presence in praise, gratitude and quiet. Always be working through some study and read the bible daily. Make time for fun. Speak positively, using lots of action verbs. Act how you want to be and focus/visualize on the you you know God wants you to be. See yourself victorious with His strength. Do some service each day.
Your little sister here needs a reminder of my freedom found in Christ Jesus my Savior. I was reminded in scripture Tues “For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Corinthians 3:17, NLT” and again on Wed “So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free. John 8:36, NLT” I found encouragement in a quote from T.D. Jakes tonight “Many of us wrestle with the old man of our past simply because we’ve not “RECKONED” him to be dead.” and was just reminded by John again in ““Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32 NIV)” Just when I begin to feel I’ve forgiven those who hurt me something comes up that reminds me just how deep the hurt and the pain go and I begin to question whether I’ve really forgiven. Just when I begin to live claiming my title of “Daughter of the King” doubt tries to sneak its way in reminding me of all of the bad choices I made. I will hold onto your encouraging words here and the scripture I’ve listed above along with any other anyone wants to pass on.
While I’ve kept it very general above I’d like to ask specific prayer & encouragement around single parenting a son. When he became the age (many years ago) of when my first sexual abuse happened I struggled with letting him be close to me, but the end result of working through it all was healing. I don’t know why I foolishly thought that would be the end of it. For the last year or so I cringe every time he touches me and beg him to please just stop. He has loved to snuggle since he was a baby. I never imagine myself a mother. I didn’t think I had a nurturing bone in me. God used him to show me how to love, how to nurture, how to snuggle. I was just complimented by a total stranger when I dropped him at a friends house and he asked for a hug good bye. I was told most middle school boys don’t act like that. I have to work really hard at being the mom he needs me to be and love him in ways he needs to be loved because he needs physical touch such as just sitting next to each other or a hug while physical touch tends to make my skin crawl lately. Pray I can claim my healing from the abuse and live in it so I can shut off my neurotransmitters that make me nauseas and want to crawl out of my skin just about every time my son comes near me. That’s what I was trying to say in the first paragraph. It seemed a little to much like I was talking in code though so I needed you to know my specific spiritual needs. The more specific I can pray the more specific the answers will be. Thank you for your prayers and encouragement here today!
Little sister…
Found out in Mar my husband of 9 yrs was having an emotional affair. Then found out 2 weeks later I was pregnant with our 3rd child. One week after that, husband confessed it was also a sexual affair. My entire world was ripped into shreds by the person I thought loved me the most.
Good news is we are keeping our family together, and it is HARD…but I am wondering where my Lord is, and why He has allowed this to happen to me, my children, and now my unborn child. I know nothing happens that He is not in control of…but I’d really like to know what lesson I should be learning from this?
Little sister here… I am preparing to transfer schools in order to finish my BS, and I have been trying to plan every single day until then- suddenly I feel as though my legs have been cut off. I already work 2 jobs to get by while going to school, and now my hours have been cut literally in half. I do not know how I will make it. Also, my relationship of 2 1/2 years ended yesterday. Needless to say, I am feeling the weight of uncertainty.
I am thankful for this post today Beth! And I am thankful to be a part of this group of siestas. I will be working on memorize Psalm 25 and I am grateful for all of you who are praying for me. As a little sister I want to continue growing and learning about life so that I may be useful as a big sister one day.
Big sister here… Little sister …. I want to share this with you it comes from my devotional book and is Psalm 23:1-4 and 2Corinthians 4:16-17 written like a personal letter from Jesus to YOU….Stay calmly counsious of Me today, no matter what.Remember that I go before you as well as with you into the day. Nothing takes Me by surprise . I will not allow circumstances to overwhelm you, so long as you look to Me. I will help you cope with whatever the moment presents. Awareness of My Presence contains Joy that can endure all eventualities…..little sister do not give up now He is faithful and you are surround by His Presence and He sends angels around you to guide you and protect you..discipline your thoughts to trust Him. Take a DEEP breath and dive into the depths of absolute trust in Him…. Underneath are the everlasting arms!!! We are praying for you little sister….
Little sister (37) here: This past november, I was diagnosed with a non-curable lung disease, on oxygen, the whole works. My Mom and Dad took me in since as a single woman I was no longer able to care for myself and my two dogs. I’ve lost my car, place of my own, career….so much. I’ve been very depressed and have lots of anxiety…please pray…thank you!!
Big sister here! Oh my, y’all, I can so relate to Beth when she says she has been there!!! I am so thankful that I now know that no matter what happens and no matter how bleak circumstances may look, God is beside us holding our right right and He WILL get us through if we just hold on and grip that MIGHTY hand of His!!!
I just want to say that for those struggling in marriage, I know how hard it is!! My parents marriage has been so encouraging to me. They were married 50 years last month and they are happier now than ever but it hasn’t always been that way. They could have thrown in the towel but they didn’t and now they are SO glad they stuck it out!!! If they would have given up, they would have missed out on so many blessings and joys! Many times if you just hang in there and hang on to God, there will be a smoother road ahead. It may get bumpy at times, but it usually evens out..and then it may get bumpy again and then even out again. Just hang in there and trust God and let Him mold and shape you through the hard times.
I have learned that to make it through this life, I HAVE to stay in the Word. I just have to. If I want joy and peace, He is the only way. He is it! Nothing else can fill the Jesus shaped void in our soul…not a husband, not friends, not a “perfect” life and marriage, not great kids…nothing…only Him. It is SO important to get in the Word (and stay in the Word) and keep talking to Him. Also, memorize Scripture and meditate on it. Try to find things to be thankful for even if all you can find is something small. It seems like a lot to do but it’s SO worth! Life is hard but Jesus gives us a way to cope…through Him. He loves us so so much!!!
Hang in there, little sisters!!! This big sister is praying for you and I know a lot of other ones are, too!!
“For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand and say to you: Do not fear, I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13
“I follow close to You; Your right hand holds on to me.” Psalm 63:8
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love.” Romans 5:3-5
“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.” 1 Peter 3:1-2
Little sister here: I was there….pregnant with # 2 and with nothing (no house, cars, or anything else kind of nothing) had to MOVE there for 15 months. I WAS THERE. I had a hubby and #1 with me, while #2 had to fight to appear. It was hot, ugly, violent, messy, sad, angry, and stupid. I had to live there even after my son emerged perfectly from he depths of the NICU–we were still in the middle of the hottest fire I’ve yet to experience.
But God saves all. God saved us. God even restored a little bit of the remaining inhabitants–or at lease a touch of the relationship with them.
I’m not angry for those who have to live there, or even just have to visit because with God, we will all come through the fire without even smelling like smoke.
But I’m going to memorize Psalm 25 anyway–because God’s word was and still is my salvation. I was able to emerge from there with the sweet smell of my babies on me. #2 is almost 3 now–we are still being blessed beyond our wildest dreams–Ephesians 3:20 is alive and well with me.
Worry about nothing; pray about everything. God will take care!
Big Sister…
DON’T GIVE UP!!! I have been the trenches of that hard forsaken oppressive place. Just don’t give up, stand up one more time, don’t think to far forward, one more step, one more time… keep a couple of scriptures WITH YOU AT ALL TIMES. Read & Speak them constantly over you, it will not return void but somehow, sometime… I tell you it will accomplish what it was sent to do. I had those scriptures on my mirror, kitchen, bed, bag, car, work – in was an insane time.
Yes, yes, yes… He will send His lightning and vanquish your enemies, yes He will be merciful, He will strenghten you, He will light your way, yes He will enlarge your path and you WILL NOT SLIP!
Honest, like David, you will see ‘I have been young and now am old, yet I HAVE NOT see the righteous forsaken!
Keep walking towards His Light.