So Long Insecurity Discussion Conclusion!

Hey, Darling Things! I am sitting at a Cafe Express in Houston on yet another gorgeous Spring day while Melissa (home for Spring Break) is meeting with a Wordpress moderator so she (and we) can develop some proficiency on this format. It’s more complicated behind the scenes than you might think.  She wanted me to be part of the tutoring session but I told her that I needed to do this post. Then she suggested that I come along but sit at a different table while we do two different things. I tried planting myself only three tables over but I’m interminably nosey (does it go with size of nose??)  and kept listening to what they were saying. I prefer to do that with total strangers, especially couples that appear to be on first dates, but not many people are at Cafe Express this morning for breakfast and no one appears to be dating. Does anyone really date anymore anyway? A subject for another day.

I am happy to be here just the same whether or not the people watching is paltry. The coffee choices are enough to keep me intrigued. You don’t just get coffee here. You get choices like these in big huge cannisters:

“Equatorial Coffee” – “hints of buttery toast (who knew? no need to even eat breakfast with it??), cocoa nib (i love me some cocoa nib! i just didn’t know it! what is a nib exactly? like a little niblet?), almond, bold fruit, sweet (no one ever tells me I’m sweet. fun on occasion. never “you’re so sweet.” i don’t know why.), bright and clean.”


“Costa Rican Coffee” – “balanced (that’s me), clean (in Christ), classic (wannabe), winey (only when I don’t get my way. a lot of southern baptists don’t believe in being other kinds of whiny)with berry notes (berry notes? as in music notes? or as in sticknotes?), rich in body (is there no way we can get away from this?).”

 So, as you can see, I’m dealing with a few distractions. And have had a bit too much Costa Rican. I think I’m allergic to berry notes. Melissa and I had an awkward moment when we pulled up in the parking lot and started stacking up our stuff to come into the restaurant. I have a paperback copy of SLI that I use to prepare our weekly discussions. All the sudden I flashed it at her and said, “I can’t take this in there.” How lame would that be? She said, “Tear off the cover.” So I did. Ripped that thing right off.

It’s time for us to finish up! I am so grateful for your partnership through this journey. You were such a big part of the inspiration to write it (not because you’re insecure or anything… but because I knew I’d have a little company if I went public). When it came out, reading it together seemed only fitting. Thank you for your willingness to enter in. As for the rest of you, I can only imagine that you will be relieved to have this hog off the blog and I equally thank you for your patience.

Let me say quickly before we get to the final set of instructions, I loved reading about your life passions last week! One of my favorite sets of comments from this journey! (And, separate from SLI, your testimonies of receiving Christ impacted my whole Easter weekend. Superb. I felt that God delighted in it and that, Sweet Thing, is my favorite feeling.)

This week’s assignment? Finish this baby up! Please read Chapters 17 and 18 and answer the following questions:

1. Based on Chapter 17, on a scale of 1 to 10 (one-almost none, ten-over the top), how big a part has fear played in your life?  After responding with your approximation, please share what, if anything, in the chapter resonated with you.

2. Reflect over the journey as a whole. What (again, if anything) lasting and of God will you take away from it?  

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Ladies. You are a great joy to me. May the God of peace sanctify us through and through – spirit, soul, and body – until we are wholly overtaken by Him. (1 Thess. 5:23) This alone will be the essence of wholeness.

I love you.


497 Responses to “So Long Insecurity Discussion Conclusion!”

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  1. 251
    Rene says:

    What part has fear played in my life? How about what part has fear NOT played in my life? 10+. This was pre-Jesus (9 years ago). Pre-SLI, I was probably at 5, post SLI close to zero. Chapter 17 enlightened me to not being the only one who thinks of the deaths of their loved ones. I thought I was just mean, evil and horrible but wow – it’s normal. Ditto for imagining devastation and defeat. I had a big “click” on the trusting God issue last week so I feel saying zero on the fear (at this season in my life) is true. Fear comes, I imagine being carried by my Lord even though I can’t seem to talk to Him, I run over some memory verses and again, wow – that’s what instant healing is all about.

    I think that last sentence sums up what this journey has done for me. The memory verses by the way Siestas, comes from the blog where we all listed Scripture verses. I will be returning to that as long as it remains available. Thank you all for this journey. I am so glad to not be alone in some of the things I think about.

    Claremore OK

  2. 252
    FaithWalking says:

    Ever since I finished your book, Whitney Houston’s lyrics to her song, “The Greatest Love of All” have been echoing in my mind:

    “I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone’s shadows
    If I fail, if I succeed
    At least I live as I believe
    No matter what they take from me
    They can’t take away my dignity!”

    Preach it, Sista, and thank you for loving and obeying God. You will never know how God has used you as an instrument to much of my healing…


  3. 253
    Sara says:

    1) I’m going to go with an 8. I really had to think about it and came to the conclusion that I’d be lying if I said a number any lower. I stress and worry over the littlest things which has led me to be very fearful. I really liked chapter 17 because I feel like it summed up the previous chapters so it is one that I feel like I can go back and read often.

    2) SLI has helped me in sooo many ways. Before I read it, I don’t even think I really truly knew what insecurity was(or the complexity of it). Now I know EXACTLY what it is, how incredibly dangerous it is, and how I can overcome it with the help of our SAVIOR.

    18/single/Belton, Tx

  4. 254
    Tami says:

    1. Fear has been a major factor for most of my life, so I suppose I would give it an 8 for the hold it had on me in the past. The Lord has been setting me free from it over the last several years, though. Now I would only give it a 2!

    This resonated with me most. “Fear of the future makes people settle for things in the present that completely defy abundant life. It also insults the grace of God that will be piled up in heaps for us when hardship comes.” Amen! Amen! Amen!

    2. I am clothed with God-given strength and dignity. It is mine to keep. No one can take it from me!

  5. 255
    Nancy says:

    1. Fear has ranged from a 5-9 depending on the stage of life or the situation. Often fear hasn’t prevented me from doing things, but I have felt high levels of anxiety while doing them, which has robbed some of the joy. The part that resonated with me is about how fear consumes massive amounts of energy that can affect our health, our relationships, and our opportunities. And I loved how you led us through the fear to the end concept (like in Esther), and can really see, at the end of the day, it really is all about trusting God. Period. (On a side note, God has been working a lot on me with fears this year, and interestingly, when I went to the Habitat for Humanity All Women’s build last week, I was doing all kinds of work on a ladder, and for the first time ever, wasn’t afraid to be up on that ladder. God had removed a fear that I hadn’t even consciously asked Him).

    2. This journey as a whole has been great because not only did it look at root causes, but also gave me tools to use for ripping out the root of insecurity and let it be replaced by the root of God’s love. Grounding myself in several specific scriptures as well as having both the maintenance prayer and the repair prayer will be so useful in my journey, along with my own heartfelt prayers. God has used a combination of your book, a few other essential books, and the Celebrate Recovery ministry to look at areas of codependency, fear, and insecurity, to change me into a new woman. One that can have no fear of bad news, with a steadfast hear, trusting her Lord. I’m learning what it means to laugh at the days to come, and loving every minute of it. Thank you!

    Lexington, Ky, Single, late 30s

    (p.s -that car wash story might be the funniest thing I have ever read. You have a gift for vivid and expressive writing! 🙂

  6. 256
    Katie Taylor says:

    1. Without being overly dramatic, I’m going to go with a 9. I never really saw the direct link between my insecurity and my fear before reading this book. But now that I see it, I realize that my chronic insecurity was driven by my chronic fear.
    What resonated with me most was the sample dialogue you listed between “you and God”. As soon as I read it, I was able to personalize it: “Lord, I don’t know if I can trust my husband’s decision/leadership in regards to that decision or not”. It was like God was writing the next statement to me personally as I read it: “Yes, but can you trust ME, Katie?” Whoa. I felt the fear diminish in that moment. God is in control of that man, and God is good, faithful, and loving towards me! I realized that I had been walking around here feeling like everything was wrong b/c of that decision that was made that I can’t fix. And in that moment God woke me up to remember that He is Sovereign! I can trust that nothing is wrong, but all is perfectly going as planned and His plan cannot be thwarted! I’ve been saying this when tempted to feel insecure about that: “God ALONE is in charge of my future and the ONLY one who can hold me back!”

    2. I started this journey devastated b/c of a missed opportunity (not starting seminary this past semester). It was no coincidence that this book study began shortly after I didn’t go somewhere I knew God was leading me to go. God has mercifully tended to my heart through this book study. One of the scariest things I learned was that insecurity can cause you to miss your purpose if you let it. That was precisely what happened to me. I was scared to death I couldn’t do it. I still feel God pulling me toward seminary, and now I feel armed with what I need to fight off the insecurities that held me back. Just now I sense God saying, “Katie, this was a pre-requisite course that I have tailored just for you before you start seminary…So Long, Insecurity 101. Grin. I love God’s humor!

    Thanks for writing this, Beth. I’m a little sad its over, but I’m ready to face the future God has planned for me as a Secure Woman, clothed with Jesus Christ himself!

    So Long, Insecurity…for real

    Russellville, AL

  7. 257
    April says:

    1. Fear has played a BIG part in my life! I’d probably give it an 8. It’s been a relatively constant companion for as long as I can remember. Two of Beth’s statements really jumped out at me. The first is, “We can give ourselves to something greater than painlessness. We can give ourselves to purpose.” My husband has felt God leading him into something that is very scary to me, something that will be difficult and at times even painful. But it is something that has the potential to tremendously impact the Kingdom of God. Satan knows it and is hitting me HARD with all kinds of fears. But I need to choose purpose over painlessness. The second statement that resounded in my soul is, “Fear of the future makes us settle for things in the present that completely defy abundant life.” So often I settle for less than abundance because to pursue abundance seems so risky. But what is truly risky is settling for the mediocre life.

    2. God has used this book to teach me that I don’t have to live with insecurity! (As silly as it seems, I really don’t think I realized this before.) Since insecurity is so ingrained in my thought patterns and emotions, I know that becoming a secure woman of God probably won’t happen overnight. But I have begun the journey. A journey I need to allow God to lead me on until the very end. A journey I need to lead each of my four daughters on. I pray that God will uproot every source of insecurity in my life and that I will KNOW just how secure I am in Him!


  8. 258
    AmyJo says:

    Wildwood, MO

    1) 7 – I know fear has had an effect throughout my life (because I analyze everything and worry about all the what ifs), but has not caused me to change my path in life or controlled my decisions. (i.e. when I was single and searching, I didn’t let my “fear” of never finding the right man control my behavior. I bought a condo when I was 23 and thought that I would live in it for a few years before Prince Charming would find me. Instead, I waited 10 years for God to bring him to me. But, had I lived with the constant fear, I may have spent those 10 years in an apartment, rather than making a good financial decision.)

    Even though I had read it in the fear chapter of the Esther study, I still needed to hear the part about what if my worst fear happens, then “Trust God”. I also liked the various Scripture references that I can go to when I’m feeling the fear and insecurity well up inside of me and I need some reassurances (Prov 3:5-6, Psalm 112, Prov 31:25 and the list on page 33)

    2) The main thing that I will take from this journey is to be aware of my insecurity triggers so that I can identify that pit-in-my-stomach feeling as insecurity and then decide what to do with it: if it’s not a huge deal, let it go; if it’s still bothering me after some time has passed, address it appropriately. Before reading this book, I would have simply reacted, and can now see how that can sometimes make matters worse (and is definitely not a good characteristic to have). I can also say that this book and discussion group has allowed me to discuss my insecurities with my husband, so that he can also be aware of them and help me through them. I have already had situations where I would have reacted completely different than I did (having read the book) and thought to myself “That’s just my insecurity – I’m not going to let it get the best of me!” And, I’ve also had opportunities to try to help other women by building them up, rather than “competing” with them and their insecurities. This book has given me a new perspective on the healthy, secure woman God created me to be!

    Thank you for explaining insecurity to us, Beth and also for sharing your personal journey with us! You are such a blessing to women! God surely knew your purpose – and you’ve bravely embraced it! I only hope that He can use me to touch just one other woman’s life in the way you have affected mine.

  9. 259
    Emily says:

    1. On a scale from 1 to 10, I’d probably have to say 7. Mostly my fears come in the form of worry, and I’ve been a chronic worrier a long time (way too long). Trusting God no matter what happens in my life is what really struck a chord with me from Chapter 17. Knowing that I will be okay if some of my fears are realized because God is going to be there to take care of me no matter what happens. He won’t leave me. He won’t disappoint me. He is all I need.

    2. Through this journey, God has brought things up to the surface of my heart that had not been there before. Things that I needed to see for myself so that He can make me into the secure person that He has always wanted me to be. I’ve gotten some great scriptural truths, as well, that I can hang onto when I feel insecurity sneeking up on me. I’ve also become more aware of how insecurity plagues all of us (women and men) and the importance of encouraging others to be more secure.

    Beth, You are one of the sweetest people I’ve come across. Thanks for sharing your heart, and keep on keeping on in the Lord.

    Topeka, KS

  10. 260
    texatheart says:

    Finished the book tonight. Loved every second of it. So much now as I look over the past, I see now through different eyes. Events in my life that stole my security and instilled doubt, I see through the assurance that God was there and that is how I survived.
    1. Fear has played about a 6 in my life. Just enough to get in the way, but not enough to flat out think that the things that I fear are totally controling me. It was through this chapter though, that I realized I was not celebrating my security with God. I lived my childhood through a bunch of junk that without God’s love and presence in my life, I would never have survived. I always held on to the idea that since that happened I am not as good as the next person. You know, damaged merchandise. My value doesn’t come from what I do or who I am in this earthly life. My value comes from whose I am and will be in this eternal life. That is all I need to know!

    2. What am I going to take away that is lasting and of God is the fact that my security of who I am, does not come from me, my boss, my kids or anyone else on this earth. My security comes from whose I am! I plan to stand firm in that and stop letting people tell me I am not good enough or let the enemy put those little doubts inside my big head. Now, I can’t wait for the 24th!!

  11. 261
    texatheart says:

    Oops forgot one last time.


  12. 262
    phillipsgirl says:

    Jacksonville, FL
    30 years, married 10

    1. I’ve always thought one of my biggest obstacles in life was fear. I have a lot of fear of a lot of things. But it definitely plays a part in my insecurity. So probably a 6 or 7 right now, but it’s been a 9 at times in the past.

    2. The fact that I can see myself as God sees me and not just as I think others see me or even as I see myself. Truth versus lies. I can distinguish between the two. The fact that pride is a big part of my insecurity at times. Pride is my choice and I do not have to choose it. And God can forgive it.

  13. 263
    God's not-so-little Dutch girl says:

    1. Fear has played a huge part in my life. I would say I was at about a 9. I flip-flopped between praying certain things a certain way so that God would protect me and my loved ones from them, and fearing that maybe God wanted me to go through one of those things for some reason. I love the thought of thinking my fears through and seeing myself on the other side of them.

    2. I am learning to reprogram my automatic responses from taking every criticism personally and wallowing in guilt, to taking a step back, saying to myself,”I am clothed with strength and dignity, you CANNOT have it, God gave it to me,it is MINE!”
    Portage, MI

  14. 264
    Michele says:

    While I have gone through this book focusing on emotional security, I want to be able to trust God in everything.
    Today I realized that there will be no unemployment benefits this week, and may not be if/until they adjust the deadlines. Even then, I know I am close to the end of benefits, as I have been unemployed over 19 months.

    This loss of my only income, while hopefully temporary, immediately caused fear in me. It was easier to trust God with finances over the safety net of a good engineering job and a healthy bank account. Now it requires more faith.

    My God will supply all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:19

  15. 265
    robin says:

    Cleveland, TN

    1. 8, only I didn’t realize it, sounds lame I know. But I was always taught that our insecurities were placed in our lives to keep us humble. LIE, LIE, LIE, and Satan has told me this for the last time. I will place my trust in God, for I am his child. God doesn’t want me to be afraid to take the next step, but Satan does. Psalm 112:7-8 says it all and it is time to give it all to God and not have even a crumb left for Satan to grab a hold of.

    2. That no matter what my worse fear is God is always there with me if I have to endure it. But its like Beth said, “if I’m going to borrow trouble on the future, why not go ahead and borrow the grace to go with it, and see myself back up on my feet defying my enemy’s odds.

    God had placed on my heart that this was to be a year of learning to deal with my insecurities. I thank God for sending me to Beth’s studies so that through “Loving Well” I learned that “Breaking Free” from my captivity and to say “So Long Insecurities” so I can accept “The Inheritance” that as a child of God is mine. And this is only April, I can’t wait to see what God had in store for me with future studies!

  16. 266
    Vivian Malson says:

    Ms. Beth I just want to say “THANK YOU!” for your obedience in writing this book. Breaking Free started me on a beautiful, hard, exciting journey with my Savior and this book is a huge part of that journey. I haven’t always been faithful with posting comments but I have been reading and allowing God to do His thing. I feel like a very different person today than when I started reading the book. I know that I must allow God to continue this work so that my daughter can see HIM in me but also so that my son can see HIM and hopefully he will be changed as well. I am afraid that I have already modeled some very bad habits and insecurities for them. I pray also for my future grandchildren. I pray that they will see all of us as people transformed by an amazing God. I have lived in fear for sooo long. I now see things so differently and I can accept my husband’s words and not just blow him off because I know that they are from his heart.
    I am ready to step out and put into action all of the visions and dreams for ministry that He has laid on my heart. There are many unknowns for my family as we step out in faith to build His church but we know that He not only leads us but He carries us to the place He wants us to be. We grow weary but His strength will get us there.
    As I say goodbye to fear I know and have already experienced how hard the enemy will try to derail me but I know the end of the story and I know the one who is faithful and true.
    Thank you again Ms. Beth and I can’t wait to see you and Travis this weekend in Lutz!

    Blessings from one “Bibby” to another!


  17. 267
    Margie says:

    Dear Beth
    I have surprised myself by learning that fear scores about a “2” in my life today, but there were times when I know that an “11” would not have been enough to describe it.

    At my age, I have already faced down a number of my fears – I even lived through one that you described so achingly and clearly in your book, Beth. I did find out what was on the other side of that fear but, as I lived through it God drew me closer to Him than I’ve ever been. He strengthened me, calmed my fears, and led me to your powerful study (Believing God) that reminded me of who He is and of who I am. He gave me hope and then, after time, miraculously mended what had been torn and used the whole experience to His glory by bringing my husband to faith.

    I emerged from it all with the knowledge that God mean it all for good, and with a stronger faith and sense of self. We serve such a powerful and faithful God who loves us with such an immense love and cares for our every need. To have fear is human but, to hold on to it seems to betray our belief in all of His promises. As for me; I’m believing God!

    In reflecting on this journey with you, what I will take away with me is the distinct honor God has placed on our shoulders to carry this message to the next generation. As the mother of three adult daughters I see what I might have done better had I known. Well, I do know now and my precious 3 year-old granddaughter, and all of the siestas’ granddaughters will encounter at least one more woman in this world who seeks to lift them up and let them know that they have strength and dignity – because they are daughters of the King!

    Thank you for opening up yourself to us in this book and through your fears teaching us to face ours.
    You are such a gift!


  18. 268
    Denise Eldridge says:

    Dearest Beth,
    Having had you as a constant companion for at least 15 years through your Bible studies I have found so many similarities in the two of us. Oh yes, I have had many other teachers during this time but have found most of my growth at your side. God is so faithful to give us what we need. I certainly needed a better way to deal with my insecurity, and once again there you were.
    I believe God has a very unique way of dealing with us as individuals but I also believe He can use one individual to profoundly change many lives. I know this book already has and will continue to for many years to come.
    Long story, short form: My church is having a Ladies Retreat this weekend and I am leading a break-out session on SLI. There are so many who have not picked it up yet. I pray that my session with them will cause them to go out and buy a copy for themselves and others. I believe it is a must read for all women.
    I have been leading Bible studies (all of yours) and others since my sister and I ordered Filled and Free from LP so many years ago.
    I have never in all these years been asked to do anything like this. Needless to say, I have gone through many stages of insecurity in preparing my book report! Talk about the way God does things. I have really been pulling a Moses on Him these past few weeks!
    Please pray for me. All I want is to be able to help women find their way through this stuff so that they can become what God wants them to be. Praise God, I know He’s faithful.
    Thank you for laying your heart out there for all these years. God has used it greatly for me and so many others.
    With much gratitude,

  19. 269
    margaret says:

    I just finished the book last week and it seems that the enemy of my soul wanted to put me to a large test and then sit back and laugh. Our son, now 24 years old, moved to Dallas two 2 1/2 yrs. ago to attend Criswell Bible College. Long story short-within 6 months of attending college there-he announced to us that he no longer believed in Christianity in the “traditional sense”. My husband and I still can’t believe it. It broke our hearts, as you can imagine. It’s been at least a year since we have discussed any of the biblical specifics as to how he came to that conclusion, as every time we would talk about things, I would just about be broken. Anyway, through much discussion, he is planning on moving home-yes to our home-for a few months until he can get on his feet financially, and then get a place of his own here. Things were brought up again about his beliefs, and I am needing to be strengthened for the coming months. I pray for a miracle that only God can bring about and would appreciate prayer from anyone reading. It is my great desire to see the ones that I love so dearly, give God glory, and live their lives with the cross before them. Thank you and thank you, Beth for pouring yourself into God and allowing him to use you for His glory.

  20. 270
    Shannon says:

    Brimfield, IL
    1. 8 or 9 for the role fear has played in my life. I have been afraid (mostly unconsciously) of rejection so I have hardened my heart and distanced myself from the possibility of pain. Even now as I am working through all this and seeing it more clearly than I ever have before, I am terrified to reach out to others even in the sake of ministry. I want to show them the love of Christ, but battle the strong insecurities I have in making conversation, in whether they think I am wasting their time, and in whether they would just prefer that I leave them alone. I am determined to do whatever God asks no matter how uncomfortable hoping that in the process I will destroy the hold this fear has had over me.
    2. I will take away from this journey an awareness of how powerful insecurity has been over me and over others. I want to make them more comfortable about themselves by me being more comfortable in the person God created me to be. I strongly desire to not be ineffective because of the battle get over myself:) and to serve God.

  21. 271
    Kori says:

    I haven’t finished chapter 18 yet, but wanted to leave an answer for Chapter 17. i would say fear is about a 6-7 on a scale of 10. Most of my fears involve my kids or finances. The thing that resonated with me the most is the same thing you mentioned in Esther, the “What if…” senerio, when all is said and done, God will provide & protect! He is with me know matter what happens. I will live through anything He allows me to pass through, which right now feels like an awful lot. There are days I just want to give up, but I know that God is in control even when I can see or feel Him. Thank you Beth for your heart and willingness to be so open and willing to share with all of us! God bless and protect you and your wonderful family!

    Trevor, WI

  22. 272
    Deborah says:

    I have dealt with fear for a long time. Being a victim of a violent crime brought such a horrible fear in my life. I couldn’t for years go to the grocery store without sometimes having panic attacks. If someone followed me out I would drive different ways, If someone looks at me wrong to this day, it can still buckle my knees. I used to collapse on the floor when I would get home in such terrible fear. Now, I still buckle my knees, but in front of the most wonderful, powerful GOD. HE is still working on me but has healed so much. Max Lucado’s book FEARLESS describes when Christ asks the disciples-“Why are you so afraid, I am right here?” Now daily believing it. I know HE is so faithful.

    This was a very hard book for me to read. Honestly, I kept putting it down. You are very passionate writer, and there were times I felt like I was being ripped apart. It is not just your words, or of course HIS words, that glorified our LORD in this book, it was the way it was written.

  23. 273
    Monica Ciampa says:

    What an awesome & eye-opening journey this SLI journey has been. Reading the book was great, but taking the journey with other women & reading all these entries has truly blessed me & changed me. God is so good.

    1.) Fear has played way too big of a role of about a 8 in my life. God has really shown me alot of my insecurities(false positives) & fears through this book & set me free of basing my opinion on others. God’s is the only one that is TRUE!!I love what you said & it has stayed with me that “You & I are gonna have to come to a place where we stop handing people the kind of power only God should wield over us!” He has challenged me to let the HEALTHY, UTTERLY WHOLE, COMPLETELY SECURE part of me to increasingly overtake this vessel until it drives my every emotion, reaction, & relationship!!I’m sick of insecurities making an idiot out of me over & over. HE is my SECURITY & STABILITY!! And I will be challenged to live this the rest of my life on this planet. I can’t but He can!!I’ve learned & am comfortable with the fact that God sees the vulnerable places in my soul & I trust Him & know how deeply He loves me & accepts me. He’s made me aware of several triggers & I can now say in that rush of insecurity “It’s OK. I’m completely clothed.”(PSALM 31:25)

    2.)I will take so much with me from this journey. God has given me a clearer picture of Himself through His Divine Attributes of Omnipotence & Omniscience! And His timing was perfect. I am eternally grateful for getting to see this glimpse of His beauty! He’s shown me that I can really say “NO THANKS” I can make a DELIBERATE CHOICE to refuse insecurity the space to seed. I will not mud wrestle in the potholes & choose to take the high road & keep praying blessings (1 Peter 3:9)cause I am clothed with strength & dignity!(PSALM 31:25)
    I love what you said in the Esther study I just started this week…”With our timebombs of emotion & a being a hormone about to happen we have a destiny!! I <3 it!! I've made up my mind that the only way someone can take my security from me is if I hand it over to them. I…Have…This…Treasure!! & It's His dwelling Place!!(2 Cor. 4& Psalm 84:1)

    Ultimately, I've learned that I can fight to find purpose! It's not about me but all about HIM! My past has not come full circle to it's complete redemption until I allow Christ to not only defuse it, but to use it! I know that ultimately the wind that has been driving my insecurities has been fear & fear is straight from the enemy of my soul. I'm learning to identify it & trade it for Trust! My life verse has literally became PSALM 112:7-8 & I am also Bound & DETERMINED to become an honestly SECURE HEART!!I am free from self torment cause I KNOW That in the end God will work all things out to my advantage & my enemy will NOT triumph over me. In the end it is beautiful!(PSALM 90:17)

    "She will have NO FEAR of bad news; Her heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. Her heart is secure, she will have NO FEAR; in the end she will look in triumph on her foes." PSALM 112:7-8

    Monica Ciampa
    New York

  24. 274
    Tina says:

    Hard to believe we are finished with the reading but I think in a way the journey is just beginning!! I am excited about all He has been revealing. And I am so looking forward to the simulcast next weekend. I’m going with those 2 I mentioned who are so precious to me…my 2 daughters and 3 other girls from church. It is going to be a blessing I just know it.

    Question #1…my fear level….it depends…one thing I do know and I rejoice in is this…I can now identify it and call it out. I used to be very good at going with the flow and not rocking the boat. That has led to a lot of insecurity, fear and loss of dignity for me. I am learning to speak….not be to hurtful to others but because I understand now that it is His desire for all people to be clothed with strength and dignity and not at the expense of another.

    Question #2….what are my take aways….1. I have value and worth and security is mine to take hold of and keep. 2. He is my daily MANNA….it hit me like a ton of bricks today, I mean I know this but today I really, really, really know this….He is so faithful and we can trust Him.

    I am so thankful for this journey…


  25. 275
    Kathy says:

    I am 50 years old and have been walking with my Lord for seven years. I have had the most amazing journey participating in many Beth Moore Bible Studies, and have just finished reading this latest book. I am still processing, moving the words from my head to my heart and from my heart to my head. As I am about to be married for the second time, I am very hopeful that the good news settles deep into my core of being.
    Thankyou for sharing our ongoing struggle to walk in wholeness with our Abba.

  26. 276
    Nelli Fultz says:

    1.) Fear has played a 10 for most of my life but in the last couples years maybe a 3 or 4(fear still tends to be my first response to a situation until I get a grip, pray, and remind myself of God’s truth). I went through a season during my college years 5 years ago where fear and panic attacks became so bad that I would hardly leave my house for months! God and His Word brought me through that time. This was the first time in my life that I began to pour over God’s Word and memorize scripture. It was also during this time that I was first introduced to Beth Moore through the bible study “Believing God”. Thank you Beth, it was absolutely perfect for that season of my life.

    2.)Wow! I am taking lots from this Bible study. #1: Believing security is possible! I think I started this book with the notion that insecurity was just something I would have to live with but God wants nothing less for me and all His children but complete security in Him. #2: I am clothed with strength and dignity. Reminding myself daily.
    #3: I will show security until my faith becomes sight. Here lately when I’ve been tempted to be insecure I’ve started asking myself how a secure person would act in that situation and responding in that way even if I don’t feel like it.

    Thank you Beth! Can’t wait for the simulcast. =)

    N. Fultz
    Kingsport, TN

  27. 277
    Dianne Walters says:

    1. Fear has played a pretty big part in my life, so I would say approximately 8-9. A couple of things resonated with me. The first is that “fear consumes massive amounts of energy and focus and can chew a hole through our intestines, our relations, and countless great opportunities.” The second was your statement that “without realizing it, I mostly trusted God to do what I told Him.” Love the question we should be asking (p.333), “What will God do if . . .?” And the answer, “I, the Maker of heaven and earth, will . . .” followed by all the things from scripture that God will do. I was able to share that with my son who had some difficult things to deal with yesterday and it really encouraged him as well.
    2. I will take so many lasting things away: scriptures that I will repeat when I begin to feel insecure and the understanding that pride and fear result in insecurity. Already, I’m catching those old habits and beginning to react in different ways when pride or fear trigger those insecurities. I want to be an example of a strong, secure woman in the Lord to my daughters-in-law and my granddaughter and all the young women I may have influence over. This will be a journey that will take time and I will keep this book close by and refer to it alot, but I feel like I’m taking steps in that direction already. I am clothed with God-given strength and dignity and no one or thing can take that away from me.

    Thank you for loving us enough to be so very transparent with us. Your time and effort is not wasted. You have discipled me over the years in so many way and I’m so thankful to you.
    Love you!

    Dianne – Hartselle, AL

  28. 278
    Bertie says:

    1. about a 7 overall

    Idea that resonated: The cleansing process can be a mess.

    2. Overall takeaway: It’s worth it.


  29. 279
    Donna B. says:

    Dear Beth (and everyone else is “Siestaville”)…
    I just finished the book yesterday, and laughed so much when I read the story of your sister-in-law in the car wash. As a matter of fact, I had just finished running my car through a local car wash when I read the chapter. During the car wash experience I was on the phone with my simulcast “partner in crime” as we were frantically trying to find the status of our yet to arrive satellite dish. She was frazzled and I was trying to listen with the roar of the car wash noise in the background! I shouldn’t have been, but as I began reading chapter 18 I was surprised at how God’s timing once again is impeccable.

    As for rating my fear, it really depends on the situation how big of a factor fear is when related to my life. I guess for things that matter most, like raising responsible Christian daughters, fear is almost paralyzing at times. I too, am raising my daughters to be in the world and not of it. With that, I fret over whether or not I’m balancing enough…That fear also overflows into other relationships as well. My eyes were opened with your illustration of fretting over when your daughter came home late, and the scenarios you ran through your head before she came home. I’ve been known to have had a couple of those moments. I do need to just trust Jesus more.

    Trusting Jesus is about the only thing that is getting me through current trials. Trying to communicate the importance of trusting Jesus to my oldest daughter, Holly, right now is a test in and of itself. (Not sure if anyone read or not on other posts but my oldest and middle daughter were in an accident where the car was totalled and they walked away with very minor injuries…then days later our cousin, John, (who was only 3 months older than Holly), was tragically hit by a truck and killed instantly–both John and Holly are high school seniors–John was walking with a best friend TJ who was also killed). As questions keep coming to surface over the what if’s, why’s, etc. I just keep going back to having to trust Jesus.

    As for our satellite dish, it is scheduled to arrive tomorrow and will be installed on Friday. Again, I’m trusting Jesus that it’ll all work out. Looking forward to the 24th, when I along with many others can get even closer to kissing our insecurities good-bye.

    Donna B.
    3 kids
    Lynn Haven, Fl.

  30. 280
    *Lindsay* says:

    Bangor, Maine

    1. For most of my life, fear was probably an 8.5. It’s probably a 2.5 – 3 now. I had already heard most of Chapter 17 in previous Beth Moore studies, and at the time it rocked my world! I literally forced myself to say, “If the absolute worst . . . if _______ happens, in the end, God is still God, I’ll still believe Him, and I’ll still live for Him.” It’s not easy to look your worst fears in the face and work through it, but it’s SO freeing! God has really taught me in the past year to trust him with everything . . . to believe him despite whatever the current circumstances may present. For anyone struggling with fear or trust in God, I highly recommend Beth’s “Believing God” study. It’s amazing, and it truly changed my life, my attitude, and my entire relationship with God. It shook me to the core, yet caused me to love God so much more deeply.

    2. I’ve never thought of myself as an insecure person, but this book helped me pinpoint little areas that stem from insecurity. The prayer in Chapter 9 (I believe that was the chapter) and the practical application is what’s blessed me the most. In fact, in the past 2 weeks or so, I’ve consciously stopped myself from going down a particular thought path. I’ve recognized the temptation to take offense to something silly or let someone take a tiny portion of my dignity. I’ve recognized it, and denounced insecurity. While reading this book, I was confronted with the fact that I can’t let silly insecurities rob me of blessing others or reaching my full potential in ministry. Thank you, Beth, for documenting your personal journey with us!

  31. 281
    Andrea S. says:

    Okay girls. I had no idea that God was going to BLESS me with the time to finish this thing up with you, but here I am!

    1. 10+ When Beth talked about playing out the scenarios in her head about what COULD happen, that was so me! I have never allowed myself to go beyond the devestation. This one really hit home for me. We are currently in the middle of a mess of a situation with my step-children and their biological mother, and God has been telling me that the kids are following my lead in all of this. And we had the greatest conversation about if this whole thing doesn’t work out like you want it to-what then? And how God is in control and He will work this thing out for the good in our lives. He does not take lightly the struggle they are going through, and he knows the depth of their hurt. But all we need to do is fall back on two words….TRUST GOD. Not trust God if or when, but TRUST GOD-period. Amen!

    2. The thing that God has been speaking so clearly to me-even before I read these last two chapters was that He has my beginnings and my endings…He knows the best path for my journey….even when hurts….even when its scary….even when every part of my humanness is screaming to run the other way….and I need to just fall back in His arms and TRUST.

    Beth- I love you so much for being bold enough to journey through us with this. I have learned so much about myself and my responses, but also about those around me. He has used this book to peel blinders off my eyes that I didn’t even know were there. So thank you sweet Beth for following God’s will for your life!

    In Him,
    Moorhead, MN

  32. 282
    Stephanie T says:

    Stephanie T
    Macclenny, FL
    30’s Married

    ch 17- Ive been scared since the day I was born. On a scale of 1-10 Im a 100. I have had some serious issues with trusting God over the last 10 years specifically. But, I believe that I can stop overthinking it and just say, I trust you. I trust You.

    ch 18- I finished the book last night and I woke up and read the prayer again on the last page. I tore it out actually and Im going to put it up on my bathroom mirror for a while I Think. Im going to say it every day until it sinks it. I think most importantly is that Ive learned that Im worth being secure in myself, not because of anything Ive done, but simply because I am His.

  33. 283
    Christine says:

    Hi Beth!

    My ladies small group has just started reading through SLI together. I wanted to take a second to affirm you and thank you for this GIFT to our sex! I knew we were in for a great journey when I cried through the Acknowledgments, laughed my head off through the Introduction and underlined and highlighted almost every word in Chapters 1-3!

    God continues to use your ministry to affirm what He has already planted in my heart! He is so, so, so, so GOOD!!!

    Much, much love in HIM,

  34. 284
    Missy says:

    30’s, married
    Tulare, CA

    1. I lived the majority of my life at an 8 – suffered from generational sin of worry and fear. My mother is a chronic “worse case scenario” type but in her defense her two older sisters and her mother suffer even more than she does so she comes by it naturally. Breaking Free revealed how my fearful and worrisome nature was a sin and that I was being held captive by this stronghold. I know that through that study, I resovled to break this cycle of almost constant fear and lack of faith. SLI has revealed that my insecurity has masked a lot of my fears that continue to keep me in bondage and I still have a lot of work to do. What resonated with me: almost every word but specifically, “TRUST GOD” – needed this shot in my “arm of faith”. John 20:27 “STOP DOUBTING AND BELIEVE”…need to memorize this one. Being aware of my thoughts and captive the fear. Acknowledging that real or not – God’s got this. How Satan “taunts us unmercifully”…that is a PERFECT description and awakened a righteous anger in me over how Satan has been taunting me with specific fears for so long. Also, working through the fear – “then what…then what…then what?” I had forgotten this lesson from Esther so I was thankful for the reminder and great weapon against Satan’s attack. And finally, Ps 112:7-8 that gives me hope of freedom from “self-torment” Lord, make me like the one of whom the Psalmist writes.

    2. I can’t count the number of times I have spoken aloud “I am clothed with STRENGTH and DIGNITY!” Memorizing scripture, at times, has been very difficult for me but I know that God had this one especially for me because I read it once and haven’t forgotten it (even remember the reference Proverbs 31:25!) But I think the most lasting thing I will take from this journey is HOPE. The hope in knowing that I do not have to live the rest of my life bound by the stronghold of insecurity. Christ provides freedom and power to take captive every insecure thought and stand firm against Satan’s unrelentless fight over my security. Because of this journey, I feel an urgency to actively weed out the areas of insecurity in my life for me, for my gender and specifically my sister and her daughter. I feel like throughout this journey, God has presented opportunities for me to test my new found skills and walk away successful. Although, I have not been perfect, I have even felt God’s protection in my failure as I quickly acknowledge my weakness in the flesh. I pray God’s word will be sealed on my heart. I want to be a woman who no longer fears bad news. My heart will be steadfast, trusting the Lord. My heart is secure. I will have no fear in the end I will look in triumph on my foes.

    Thank you Beth, Melissa and Amanda and the countless others who make this happen to provide the opportunity to study a topic that has plagued me for a lifetime. Melissa and Amanda, you are blessed to have such a passionate mom who desires to serve God. May God bless you all in every aspect of your lives. It has been a blessing to travel this journey.

  35. 285
    Rosie says:

    Married 50
    Tacoma WA

    Ch 17
    1) I can’t believe the book is finished. I started out answering on paper for fear someone might know me. I think my fear factor is about 10. Once I started to post comments I tried to make sure to do it each week. This is the first week I have been on time.

    2) What resinated with me was, when I started this book I thought I had a few issues with insecurity. Then I realize, just as you said, I have been in fear so much it’s just part of me.
    I loved this chapter I have had this huge secert or lie or something I’ve been carrying around for ever. After this chapter, this book, I think I can get rid of almost all of it. I thought I trusted God I said I trusted Him, but I haven’t. Not with a whole heart. I haven’t been seeking Him. I wasn’t in His presence when I was headed down the fearful path. I wasn’t in His presence when I felt surrounded by intimadating people and I wasn’t in his presence when I felt I had no control of my own body. I am getting it! It is to trust Him with my whole heart. To pray in every situation to put myself in His presence. When I am with Him I will walk down His path, I will ask Him, How will He get me through this? and I will trust He will. He will say… I copied this page 333, I cried on this page. All my life, Beth all my life He has been there. What have I been doing and I have been afraid of one thing or another. I am going to start living in His presence by seeking Him! I am going to stop being afraid and stop doubting myself. I will read this chapter again and probable again alot opened up for me here, Thank you.

    Ch 18
    1)I kind of reflected a bit in the last answer but the whole book over all I believe I am coming away feeling alot better about myself. I feel lifted and stronger then I ever have before. I believe God’s timing was involved in my reading this and sitting me down in a bible study called “Breaking free” at the same time. They went hand in hand I guess He knew I needed a double dose of Beth. I could say I wish I had this study 30 years ago, but I’ve learned this is Gods timing.

    2) What I will take away from this study, hopfully lasting, that God has given me is myself. I have been under layers of what this world has made me. I want to be who God has made and intended me to be. HE has giving me so many scriptures through this study. The one that means most is Jeremiah 29:12-14a. I have nothing to fear. Bottom line I know the truth, it is to stop listening to the enemy and insecurity and focus on God.
    I will take off these old cloths of insecurity before I put on the new cloths of strength and dignity. And I will laugh at the days to come. My insecurity has over stayed his welcome its time to say so long.

    I want to say thank you Beth for putting yourself out there. You are diffently not alone. This was hard to go over, dig up, and get through but it was worth it. I can’t tell you how peaceful I feel. Thank you so much.

  36. 286
    Sandy says:

    Beth, I just started reading So Long Insecurity – I didn’t realize how insecure I was! I became a Christian in my early 30’s, and I thought that it was too late for me to catch up with everyone else. Boy did I have that all wrong! It’s not what I do, it’s what Christ does! I am now in my mid 40s, and when I look back on the chapters of my life, I see His grace, redemption and love through it all. I have been through molestation, the death of a baby, morbid obesity, marital issues, attempted suicide and of course, depression.

    What amazes me is that Christ has taken everything that I’ve gone through and used it for good. He has been moving so many mountains in my life, I am overflowing! I can’t hold it all in. I look back and can see that even before I knew Him, He was with me. Today I stand firm on the Rock. He has restored my life. He has given me four wonderful children, He has taken 85 pounds of sin and disobedience and gluttony off of my body, He has restored my marriage and after almost 27 years together, made it stronger than it ever was. I am the opposite of depressed! I feel like my feet don’t touch the ground. I want to dance before God like David did. I want to shout from the rooftops that Christ took the most unlikely person and did things that can only be attributed to Him. How wrong it would be if I took any credit at all for what He has done. I give Him all of the glory. I realize now that the things I have gone through were not for me. They were for the person who needs to hear what Christ has done in the life of a regular, ordinary woman.

    I’m so excited!

  37. 287
    Kristi says:

    Lewisville, TX
    late 20s

    1) I would say on a scale of 1-10, fear is somewhere on the 7-8 range in my life. Some of it is my natural personality that I learn to work through and combat, some of it is ridiculous that I just need to give up control of. Psalm 112:7-8 resonated with me the most in this chapter…along with “she can laugh at the days to come.” Even though you are not doing the Scripture Memory Team this year, I have committed to doing it on my own. I just wrote in my spiral the Psalm 112 passage for the last half of April!

    2) One of the most lasting things I’m currently taking with me is declaring to myself truths that will help me hang on to my dignity. Whether that be “How beautiful is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty.” Or, if it’s just speaking truths into the downhill slope my thoughts often times slide. I’m learning that when I catch myself and speak truth into the moment I move on with my day and get over it. I want this to continue until it is second nature.

    Thank you so, so much for this study together with you and everyone else. It has been a huge blessing for me, and a wonderful time of refuge during a very, very busy season of life. God bless everyone as our journeys towards healing continue on even as we close the book!


  38. 288
    Sandy says:

    1. I’m breaking the rules and not picking a number (and i hate breaking rules!) All I know is that all my life I’ve had both the fear of failure and fear of success. As a perfectionist, I probably wouldn’t go for something unless I knew I could do or get it – fear of failure. If I wanted to accomplish something, I would wonder what would happen next? How would I know what to do? I probably just faked my way this far – fear of success. I’ve also always feared not being enough. But now I believe that in God’s eyes, I AM enough! If I’m rejected here on earth – jobs, relationships, etc. – it cannot make me insecure because God will NEVER reject me. Life will continue to have its challenges, but there is no need to fear because God has a plan for me!

    2. My ongoing theme is still my worthiness. But I do know that I am worthwhile because God made me and loves me, and He proved it by sending His Son to redeem me. No more insecurity; I will continue to increase my trust in Him with the help of His grace and mercy.

    God bless Beth and everyone who took this journey together, and may HIs grace and mercy be with you all!

  39. 289
    Sandy says:

    oops. I got excited!
    Corona, CA

  40. 290
    Barb says:

    Dear Sweet Beth & Sweet Siestas,

    1. Fear in my life = 10+ all of my life! What resonated? I underlined most of the chapter and wrote in the margins all over it!

    ** The biggest ouch & eye opener was the paragraph at the bottom of pg 323: “…trusting that He wouldn’t allow my fears to become realities.” And “…think[ing] the essence of trust is counting on God to obey you…” I did that – but didn’t realize how conditional that was & how it suggests that He isn’t trustworthy!
    ** The verses you shared in this chapter are now on my list to memorize!
    ** But most of all, I THANK YOU for the QUICK START guide!! I seem to need that kind of ‘how to’ specific steps! I’m going to have to re-read/re-listen to get it into my thick skull! I have been tested and found victorious – then tested and found wanting! But I’m not giving up, because I continue to choose to TRUST GOD, PERIOD!!!
    ** I’ve had the same fear about my spouse – never would have thought that of you, Beth! Doesn’t seem like you would ever have to worry! Thank you for your honesty – it just makes you so believable!!! Not comparing you to Christ – but He knows us because He has also suffered like us – which makes Him more believable!!!!! Interesting how that works!
    ** I loved reading the 2nd part of Prov 31:25 –“…She can laugh at days to come!”
    ** Yes, may that enemy regret ever targeting me!!!!!!!!!

    2. What Lasting & of God I will take:

    ** Prov. 31:25, my cloak of strength & dignity – and laughter!
    ** Prov. 1:16 NLT “The Lord is your security. He will keep your feet from being caught in a trap.”
    ** The ending prayer to pray every day & the prayer in Chp 9
    ** The new understanding that God DOES have my back, He is my Savior from myself, my circumstances, and the enemy. He has a plan and He has given me security, I don’t need to look for it anywhere else!
    ** I will heed His words: “DO NOT FEAR”!
    ** I will spread the word to whomever will listen and hope my life will be a shining example.

    Beth, you are sweet because you are loving, kind, understanding, compassionate, caring & encouraging!
    There is much sweetness shared here on this site – so many great posts & reply posts full of love! I’m glad I have been a part of all of this!

    love to all,

  41. 291
    Tara says:

    1. Very high. At least a 9, maybe a 10 at times. Fear of man, really. Fearing what other people would think so much that I was afraid to be myself. Chapter 17 was probably my favorite chapter. I highlighted the dickens out of it. This morning on the way to work I was feeling anxious and I didn’t know why. I knew fear was the root, but I couldn’t identify what I was afraid of. So I just kept praying, “I trust you, Lord” and “I am clothed with strength and dignity and I am laughing at the days to come.” The verses/promises on page 333 are so helpful. I realized that fear has kept me “boxed in” in so many ways…ways others would never see or know, but it has kept me from being free.
    2. The entire book was great and needed to be written; thank you for doing so, Beth. The last few chapters resonated most with me, as well as chapter 9 (the prayer). Although, if I could address Melissa for a second….
    Melissa, your excerpt in chapter 16 had me in tears. I had the same reaction when I read it the first time on the blog, although at that time, it was too tender for me to process. I had just returned from a third world country and your words could have been mine. As I read them again, this time in the book, I had to stop after every few sentences and just absorb them, while nodding my head in agreement and understanding. I wish we could sit down over a cup of coffee and talk about life here now after being there. Living here with all the abundance, comfort, security, and other things you named, is a struggle for me, but it is not something I talk about much with others, as it is hard to understand unless you have experienced it. But it is on my mind a lot. And the question your leader asked you (“now that you know, what will you do?”) is a constant prayer of mine because I don’t know what to do. If you are ever in NC, let me know. We have Starbucks galore, especially in my city. I’m not kidding.
    Can’t wait for the simulcast, ladies. I really love this blog and this community. Thanks for doing this.

  42. 292
    Sandy Hildebrand says:

    late 40’s
    Winkler, MB Canada

    Question 1: Over the top! The part that resonated the most was that I never realized that fear was the sole basis for my insecurities. I guess I just never put it all together. The second thing was imagining disasters. The what ifs? It was so comforting to be reminded that God will be with me through anything and He has. He has walked through the fire with me before and I know that He would do it again. Thank you Jesus!
    Question 2: The fact that I am who God says I am. I will work hard at not listening to Satan’s lies and live my life in freedom through Jesus Christ.

  43. 293
    Siesta Mary from MN says:

    Dearest Siesta Mama,
    In concluding this study, God showed me that I had picked up where my abusers had left off. All the time they treated me like I was nothing and told me I was worthless..after moving away from them I started telling myself the same things they were telling me.. in their words, thru their abuse. So now when I am about to look in the mirror and go off on a tirade about how worthless I am..I stop myself and I say no, you are a woman of strenth and dignity.
    I wish you could see the tears of joy and gratitude in my eyes, and you could hear my sincere “Thank You”. Last week I was sitting in church after the service with tears streaming down my face, and our dear Pastor’s wife put her arm around me and asked me what was wrong. I smiled through my tears and told her these are tears of healing, tears of joy.
    I love you Siesta Mama..your Siesta MN Girl..

  44. 294
    Katybug says:

    1. Scale of Fear in my Life: 5 I used to think that fear did not play that big of a role in my life, but after reading this chapter I realized fear pops up in my life a lot more than I used to think it did.

    2. I feel like the reading of this book really has been a journey. I am determined to take the concepts have learned and fully apply it to my life. I am excited that with the Lord’s help I am on the road to becoming a secure woman.

    Baker City, OR

  45. 295
    Cara Joy says:

    1. hmmm… 7, I guess like most people on here. I don’t think I show it outwardly all the time, but it does hold me back. One of my biggest fears is that I’ll settle in life that I’ll fail and not be what I was meant to be. That I will miss out. It’s been especially hard the last few years not knowing what to do for a career and praying about it constantly, seeing everyone around me get married, have kids etc. and “move forward” in their lives. I often feel like I’ve been left on the side of the road. I went through some intense depression in the last decade and though God recovered me from most of it I still really struggle with believing positively about my future here on earth. I also still struggle with this feeling that God is indifferent towards me and what I should do here. The enemy has had plenty of opportunities to pound that idea down in me (and he continues to try given my current circumstance) so I’m struggling to uproot that lie and get my heart to fully believe with conviction the truth that His way and thoughts and plans for me are all out of Love, never indifference.

    2. Wow, there is a lot I am taking away from this. THANK YOU. I am going to continue to pray the prayer in Chapter 9 and at the end of the book. I think one of the most profound things that sunk in was when you picked apart the verse on being clothed in strength and dignity, that I must consciously wake up and choose to clothe myself in Christ, in his strength, in the armor of God and everything Colossians 3:12 says. That “Pride is dignity’s conterfeit” that God has crowned us with that honor/dignity, He put it on our heads for a reason, that we’d consciously be aware of who we really are.

    This reminded me of your Living Beyond Yourself session on Joy. When you spoke about the little children all dressed up as princesses and knights. They felt perfectly normal dressed up as royalty because they knew that God had set eternity in their hearts. How you said that when someone asked them if they knew they would be a queen someday they’d say “why yes” while us grown up women would respond “who me?” because we have forgotten that we have royal blood in us.

    So special. I’ll never forget that. THANK YOU!! God bless you richly!!

    🙂 Cara

    single/28/fridley, mn

  46. 296
    Deana says:

    1. Based on Chapter 17, on a scale of 1 to 10 (one-almost none, ten-over the top), how big a part has fear played in your life? After responding with your approximation, please share what, if anything, in the chapter resonated with you.

    I grew up experiencing things that some would consider their worst fears. I think God and I had that chat about trusting Him even when bad things happened long before I actually told Him my worst fears like Beth had. I think I experienced some horrible fears first and then God showed me that I would stand strong after them, and the next time bad news arrived, I could reflect on the past and how He helped me then. I think the fear I struggled with the most is that the next bad news would be even worse than the horrible things I had experienced, and this is what the devil used to make me grumble at God, or even worse, blame God when the bottom did fall out. Sometimes when I was not in Christ, I shouted, “Enough already!” and cursed, and was angry. I even wanted to fit in with “God will only give you what you can handle” and hope that I couldn’t handle very much at the same time…but tonight as I type this, I think I am more secure than ever in trusting God in this fallen world, and in this body of flesh. I can write with truth this day because my heart and security are in Christ: The Lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? Thank you so much, Beth, for helping us learn awesome truth/verses to help us face the lies we have believed for so long and the battle we face in a culture of hyper-sensuality!! I love you too, Beth!!
    2. Reflect over the journey as a whole. What (again, if anything) lasting and of God will you take away from it?
    This journey has been beautiful and life-changing, and I am happy to share a poem I wrote towards the end of this book. It is just a small glimpse into how He worked in my life lately. I have a million more words to say and write about these past couple of months, but that is between me and God for now, and I cannot wait to see what fruit came from all of this one day!!!

    Spiritual Daybreak

    Your light is not always the sun.
    The leaves of Earth flicker underneath simplicity.
    Greater wonder exists beyond the sunlit edges of moving sky,
    and is hidden deeper than the olive circle of a beauty’s eye.
    Infinite radiance atop the ocean’s curves and in all the shades of color,
    leaves a yearning for more beauty still.
    Greater light can be found,
    without sight and without sound.
    A glimpse of greatness and glory,
    is when Your light takes root in man’s dust.
    And out of an old night, Your true light,
    transforms the natural order into eternal sunshine.

  47. 297
    Chesney says:

    First of all, Beth, in response to your “I love you”…I love you too! 🙂
    Second of all you should know that it is 11:52 on Wednesday night, which means I, a total non-reader, have finished your book on time. Ask anybody I know, I really don’t read anything if it is not the Bible, written by Beth Moore, or a bible study written by another author. I wish I could say I love to read, because you love to read, but really I don’t.
    Anyways 😉
    1. Reading this book has been a challenge for me in that I really really have had to think about my insecurities, because I bought the book, just because Beth wrote it, and hoped that I would see any insecurities in me and become more secure. And boy did Jesus reveal some sin that was rooted in insecurities! Praise Him! Anyways, all that to say, I needed to really think about fear for me. How big of a part IS fear in my life? Though I can’t really say fear of loosing things or people around me is a big part of my life, the Lord showed me an area I do fear. That is fear of not being who I want to be. For example, today driving in my car I was afraid thinking I won’t be the totally secure woman I want to be. Or fear that I won’t be the kind of Christian that I want to be. And isn’t that exactly what the enemy wants, for me to be stuck in my fear of not being the secure person I want to be?! So he will not win. Jesus has clothed me with strength and dignity, He has made me secure, and will continue to do so, and I “will have no fear”. (psalm 112:8ish)

    2. I can be secure in the fact that Jesus’ dwelling place (me) is beautiful. I do not need to prove, using bad math, that I am better or worse than anybody else or depersonalize anyone to make myself feel more secure. I must be secure in the fact that He has clothed me with strength and dignity and I do not need anyone else’s words of affirmation to feel good about myself.
    I feel more secure than at the beginning of this journey, have learned so much, and am excited to continually become more and more secure though His loving direction and power.

    P.S. Beth, I recorded your questions and my answers in a little journal so that this summer I can lead a small group of high school girls though this book. It is so relevant to women of all ages, and the parts about marriage are so good to prepare us for our adult lives. I cannot wait to see what the Lord continues to do in my life and what He does in the lives of the girls He brings to the small group.

    Praise Him for all He has done in all of our lives! 🙂

  48. 298
    Diane says:

    Q#1) After d2(div.2), I had been “stuck” between 7-10, not only because of d2 and what he put me through, but also because of how much I’m dealing with alone in terms of my son’s problems in the midst of the single parenting. I can’t call on my brothers or my dad to come take my son for a ride or walk or relief babysitting because they all still live back east where I’m from. The cost of living back east is so hard on a single parent wage!! But with God’s loving kindness at work since those early days, in and around me, I’m grateful I’m not “stuck” like that anymore.

    Part 2 of this question, a couple of things stood out in chapter 17: first where you said “In order to plan our feet on solid ground, we can drop the conditions off of our trust and determine that God will take care of us no matter what.” bottom of pg 324/top of 325. Also on pg 329: about not only surviving, that we have hope, and that we will thrive again. …that I HAVE hope, not me working towards hopefulness or having hope —but rather I ALREADY have hope because of Christ. Just because any past/present struggles with fear/insecurity doesn’t negate the hope already in front, in, and around me because of the ongoing work of my having accepted Christ’s work on the cross being for me too.

    This reminds me of an old hymn, here’s the first verse: “My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness, I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus’ name.” My hope & security are already a done because HE built those -for me. Not me for myself. I need to remember that, keep learning/re-learning to live out and live in his gifts of hope & security to me.

    Q#2)What, if anything, lasting and of God have I taken away from my journey as a whole? “If anything” ??…OMG!!!! LOL 🙂 I’m very blessed to be taking away so much from my journey!! But a few of the important ones for me: God already declared my value & worth I just need to remember to live in His declarations to me already given through His word; God knows being human is scary; remember what I can handle & what I can’t and that it’s ok that I’m not able to handle 100% of things 100% of the time -He’s God, and I’m not. Also not all women injured by men turn to loathing or avoiding men, some often become emotionally enslaved to them. And also that I can live in the here and now with active hope and security (pg 241), not play “wait up” for my feelings to kick in because God already said “what is IS” and it’s not for me to say “but what if”. And that –for me– also ties into what I received from chapters 17 & 18! Feelings are fickle, God’s words are facts- bottomline.

    Beth, thank you so much for starting this journey and encouraging us along the way.

  49. 299

    1) Probably like a 7. Most of the chapter resonated with me. I think I’ve trusted God to see me through to some degree, though, because He’s done it so many times before, but I’m working on trusting Him enough to let people into my life more and trust Him with my relationships.

    2) This book has been a huge part of God showing me that I am worth wanting, I am worth loving, I am worth liking, I am worth pursuing, I am worth fighting for, I am worth keeping, I am worth hiring, and I am worth noticing. For the first time in my life, I am really starting to believe this and it is setting me free. God has also shown me how much of a problem insecurity is and how damaging it can be to the way God wants us to live. Last week, I was on a youth group trip to southern California, and didn’t get to go as deep as I would have liked in the book before we left. Well, the passage we studied on the trip was Galatians 5:16-6:10. During our chapel time, this passage just spoke volumes to me about insecurity. Then, towards the end of the trip, while I was catching up on the beach, I came to the part where you brought up Galatians 5. Definitely a God thing. I want to be able to use what God has done in my life through this book to help others break free from insecurity, and the neat thing was that God was doing that as I explained the way God was using these verses to speak to me about my journey through this book to my youth group.

    Thank you, Siesta Mama, for letting God take you on this journey and helping us through it! I love you!

    Escalon, CA

  50. 300
    hisglorygirl says:

    This study has been phenomenal. Wasn’t really sure at first that I was “insecure” but I’ve learned that God knows more about me (and what I need to deal with) than I always acknowledge or realize.
    What I am taking away from this study is that God has clothed me with strength and dignity. I have always been aware of the “strength” part but didn’t realize that He has put dignity back in my wardrobe.
    The “self-talk” statements regarding the fact that no one can take away our dignity and our security were profound to me. The reason I was living in a state of indignity (is that a word?) was simply that I had given my dignity away. I’ve put some of those statements in my mind and use them whenever I’m tempted to throw away some of my dignity.
    God used the prayer chapter to cover my heart with the truth that He has restored my dignity. Thank you, Jesus! There was much to be restored.
    The Proverbs 31:25 scripture means so much to me. I’ve put it on two canvases in my scrapbook room to ever remind myself of who I am in Christ.
    Thank you, Beth, for taking on this topic and speaking the truth over us so that, by coming to the Father, we are restored in Jesus Christ!!!!!

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