So Long Insecurity Discussion Conclusion!

Hey, Darling Things! I am sitting at a Cafe Express in Houston on yet another gorgeous Spring day while Melissa (home for Spring Break) is meeting with a Wordpress moderator so she (and we) can develop some proficiency on this format. It’s more complicated behind the scenes than you might think.  She wanted me to be part of the tutoring session but I told her that I needed to do this post. Then she suggested that I come along but sit at a different table while we do two different things. I tried planting myself only three tables over but I’m interminably nosey (does it go with size of nose??)  and kept listening to what they were saying. I prefer to do that with total strangers, especially couples that appear to be on first dates, but not many people are at Cafe Express this morning for breakfast and no one appears to be dating. Does anyone really date anymore anyway? A subject for another day.

I am happy to be here just the same whether or not the people watching is paltry. The coffee choices are enough to keep me intrigued. You don’t just get coffee here. You get choices like these in big huge cannisters:

“Equatorial Coffee” – “hints of buttery toast (who knew? no need to even eat breakfast with it??), cocoa nib (i love me some cocoa nib! i just didn’t know it! what is a nib exactly? like a little niblet?), almond, bold fruit, sweet (no one ever tells me I’m sweet. fun on occasion. never “you’re so sweet.” i don’t know why.), bright and clean.”


“Costa Rican Coffee” – “balanced (that’s me), clean (in Christ), classic (wannabe), winey (only when I don’t get my way. a lot of southern baptists don’t believe in being other kinds of whiny)with berry notes (berry notes? as in music notes? or as in sticknotes?), rich in body (is there no way we can get away from this?).”

 So, as you can see, I’m dealing with a few distractions. And have had a bit too much Costa Rican. I think I’m allergic to berry notes. Melissa and I had an awkward moment when we pulled up in the parking lot and started stacking up our stuff to come into the restaurant. I have a paperback copy of SLI that I use to prepare our weekly discussions. All the sudden I flashed it at her and said, “I can’t take this in there.” How lame would that be? She said, “Tear off the cover.” So I did. Ripped that thing right off.

It’s time for us to finish up! I am so grateful for your partnership through this journey. You were such a big part of the inspiration to write it (not because you’re insecure or anything… but because I knew I’d have a little company if I went public). When it came out, reading it together seemed only fitting. Thank you for your willingness to enter in. As for the rest of you, I can only imagine that you will be relieved to have this hog off the blog and I equally thank you for your patience.

Let me say quickly before we get to the final set of instructions, I loved reading about your life passions last week! One of my favorite sets of comments from this journey! (And, separate from SLI, your testimonies of receiving Christ impacted my whole Easter weekend. Superb. I felt that God delighted in it and that, Sweet Thing, is my favorite feeling.)

This week’s assignment? Finish this baby up! Please read Chapters 17 and 18 and answer the following questions:

1. Based on Chapter 17, on a scale of 1 to 10 (one-almost none, ten-over the top), how big a part has fear played in your life?  After responding with your approximation, please share what, if anything, in the chapter resonated with you.

2. Reflect over the journey as a whole. What (again, if anything) lasting and of God will you take away from it?  

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Ladies. You are a great joy to me. May the God of peace sanctify us through and through – spirit, soul, and body – until we are wholly overtaken by Him. (1 Thess. 5:23) This alone will be the essence of wholeness.

I love you.


497 Responses to “So Long Insecurity Discussion Conclusion!”

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  1. 51

    1) The answer would be a big fat 10! God has been dealing with me on this subject for quite some time. I recently did your bible study on Esther and Session 5 was on this subject and reached out and grabbed my heart. I downloaded the audio file on itunes as soon as I could just to keep this session going and going till my mind finally fully grasps it. This chapter was a great addition to that.

    2) This journey has really shown me some areas where I’m still walking in insecurity, areas where I’ve defeated it, behaviors and habits learned during very insecure times that I’m still acting in that need to change. It has really been a great read and a great reflection on my life where I was and where I am now. There is a young lady in my life that recently opened up to me about some things she is dealing with and I can’t wait to pass this book onto her with all my handwritten notes and honest reflections. May God use this to heal her and bring her to fullness in Him.

    ~Amanda Taylor
    Richmond, VA
    29 Years Old
    Married 5 Years

  2. 52
    Tamara says:

    For so long fear had defined my life. Growing up..the sound of the beep across the television set that warned of a tornado threat would send me into a full blown panic!!! I have never even been in a tornado! That is the way 98% of my fear has been based, stemming from a very imaginative mind! It has helped me SO much to “go there” and face that wild thought pattern head on. At the end of it is always an all powerful, gracious God who loves me to the core.
    Thank-you Beth for your obedience in writing this book. I feel like you got into my head and put words to so many unspoken thoughts. I will NEVER forget that NO thing and NO one can take my security! It is God’s alone. This journey has no doubt set the stage for a “transforming” of the mind.
    “The Lord is my light and my savation-whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life-of whom shall I be afraid.” Psalm 27:1

  3. 53
    pluschei says:

    I just finished the book today….and reading the chapter titled, “What are you Afraid Of?” was gut wrenching. I can see where fear has ruled my life in the past, and only in my 50’s can I see where God is putting faith in place of fear. I sat at a park today after reading the chapter and wrote out a prayer to the Lord and acknowledged my fears; of losing my family, of having no financial security, of facing a life threatening illness (myself, spouse or children) I truly want to be free of fear, and am working diligently to trust the Lord, period. NO MATTER WHAT. Like you said, no telling God what I can and can’t handle, but trusting Him to take care of me and believing what He says is true.I memorized the verse for the SSM Celebration, “She will have no fear of bad news, her heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord, her heart is secure, she will have no fear.” Can I get that branded in my brain, please??? Lord, help me. Thank you, Beth. This book is a weapon for all of us to fight off fear, and have secure hearts, minds and spirits, knowing who we are. Then being salt and light to a world of insecure women and girls. Pam (50ish, married) in San Diego

  4. 54
    Living4Him says:

    1. I am a 10… doubt. I just never realized before how much fear tied in to insecurity. I had the privilege of hearing Beth in person in Pittsburgh…never realizing that I was on the verge of my own perfect storm…lasting until just last week. Over those many long months of fear, despair, and trials, I remembered Isaiah 33:6…”He is your constant source of stability.” I also so love Travis’s song One Storm.

    2. Where to even begin…..when I wrote those words in the front of my book at the beginning of this journey, I finished with “may I finish this book a secure woman–my prayer.” I remember thinking…yeah, right. dream on. Oh how much I was forgetting the power of my God. The storm has passed, many realtionships in my personal life that were bordering on extinction have been restored and all because of the principles found in this book, the realization that fear and insecurity were TOTALLY controlling my life, and the mighty power of my God. Now I say.”What will God do if…..” I also loved the comment in Chapter 18 indicating that this book was “…messy in a cleansing sort of way.” Clearing out debris is always messy, but so what I needed….I am refreshed, renewed, and a new mom and wife. I also feel wiser in knowing God desires me to be secure in Him….gives me more passion for Him, too. One last thought. When I am finding my true security in Christ Alone, I no longer place the unreasonable expectation of Savior on my husband.

    Thank you Beth, more than you will know. I do think that after all this hard work, I need a manicure and pedicure before the simulcast…..just because!!!


  5. 55
    Barb says:

    1. When I started this book I didn’t think I was fearful (just insecure)…but I have been a 10+. Page 322 “Fear consumes massive amounts of energy and focus and chews a hole through our intestines (ME), our relationships (?NOT SO MUCH), and countless great opportunities (ABSOLUTELY ME).” Page 325 “Sometimes trusting God means taking no further action”. “Other times trusting God means regrouping with Him until the fog clears so we know now to take the next step.”
    2. Strength and dignity. Peace. The prayer on page 346 will be my day starter.


  6. 56
    Ann says:

    Fear has always been huge in my life. It ranges from fear of not saying the right thing in certain situations all the way to financial security. I didn’t realize it was fear, I was just always “worried.” I have now changed most of those fears to one fear. I know 100% that God is in control of my life, and I am 100% confident that he knows best and I don’t want to do anything to mess that up, I know I would!!! So my fear, if you can call it that, is finding God’s will in my life. I pray constantly that he reveals His will to me, that I know what His will is for me and that I am confident and brave enough to follow His will. That’s why Proverbs 31:25 is amazing to me. Sometimes, I swear, I can FEEL myself being clothed with strength and dignity. Boy has that helped my fears. Even my ex-mother-in-law (who to this day is my best friend) told me just a couple days ago that she has noticed I don’t worry as much as I used to! I guess it is working.

    This journey has been amazing for me. I originally bought the book because I was not feeling confident in my job situation. I have had a very stable job for the past 13 years. I loved my job and was very comfortable there. It is a good paying job which is extremely important since I am a single mom of 2 daughters getting very little support from my ex. Well, my boss has made some very bad mistakes and I have found myself looking for a new job. While looking at different accounting positions, I kept telling myself I was not qualified. So I thought this book would help me there. God has lead me down a completely different career path then I could have ever imagined for myself. It is not 100% yet but it does look very positive. However, my main journey ended up NOT being my job.

    You see, I am, like many other women, a divorced single mom. My ex cheated on me, we got divorced, we tried to reconcile and he cheated on me several more times. I thought that was going to be “my story.” I know that’s how people always saw me. But, I have a much better story than that and I am just now rewriting it. It is scary at times but mostly exciting. With God’s strength and me being clothed in it and some diginity thrown in there too, that will not be my only story, just a small chapter in it!

    Rockwall, TX

    • 56.1
      Missy June says:

      Way to go, Ann! I can’t wait to hear how your story will unfold! I have been in your shoes (single mom to three little ones) and I still don’t know how the story ends – but I’m working to trust Christ with my life and the life of those precious little ones. Big Hugs!

    • 56.2
      Andrea Porter says:

      I am so impressed with you both! Single Moms, raising kids, working, looking forward to the next chapter in your lives with HOPE and EXCITEMENT, with God you two can do anything. Blessings to you both and to your families!

  7. 57
    Bobbie says:

    Beth! You ripped the cover off of your book?!! OH NO!! Just kidding. I can’t believe we’ve come to the end of our study/ies! With this ending and our Tuesday nights coming to a close–what can I study next?? 😉

    1. I’ve known for many years that I struggle with insecurities, but this book has shown me that I don’t HAVE to be a prisoner to it! I was created to be ‘secure in’ God, not insecure with my life. I would have to say that FEAR has been a ’10’ if not higher most of my life. FEAR of not having friends (I was an only child), FEAR of disappointing my parents, FEAR of loosing anyone close to me after losing both of my parents when I was 27 & 31, and FEAR of failure in general. After I lost my parents I realized that I had become more controlling, I wanted everything to be perfect!! I still struggle with that, but am trying REALLY hard to overcome it.

    2. I’m walking away from this journey giving God ALL my FEARS! AND with strength and dignity!! I’ve learned how to feel His arms around me and when issues begin to surface, I go to Him in prayer and lay it all at his feet. It’s a work in progress, but I’m recognizing so much more. Thank you Beth, for all the effort that you’ve placed in this book for us. It was a huge project and you accomplished it beautifully. I’ll never look at a sunrise or sunset with the same eyes again.

    Many blessings…
    College Station, TX

  8. 58
    LindseyM says:

    I LOVED this book, let’s be real I was a little embarrassed to get this with my roommates…because God forbid they think I was insecure. 🙂 But once I went- by myself- to get it, I knew that God was going to use this in big ways to speak to my heart.
    Fear, oh fear…oh the constant daily struggle. Sitting here, even after finishing the chapter, it is still something that God is saying “I have this, i’m right here beside you and I know the plan for next year, take a deep breath and calm down”. I’m sure that someone can relate to this. Going into another semester in college, deciding where to live, who to live with…I just finished deciding my class schedule. It never stops though, the constant fear or anxiety. “What if I move to a dorm that has girls COMPLETELY different than me?” “What if I am out of God’s will by not being on student leadership again..but what if it’s not out of pure motives that I decide to do it again anyways?” “What if a “godly” guy comes along but ends up being completely different once we start dating or get married” SO irrational.
    Fears that in reality are just ridiculous. Things that I don’t need to spend hours worrying over. When I look and see that God has NEVER let me down, he will NEVER let me go, and he will ALWAYS be beside me..never sending me somewhere he himself will not go 🙂

    2. I always love reading the verses in the Bible that go “BUT God..” because I feel like that’s how I could describe my life right now, Lindsey was so insecure, she didn’t trust that God’s plan would be good enough for her life, she was afraid that she would make the wrong decision about the small and large things in her life and that she would end up being alone, and unwanted. BUT GOD, has shown her that HE is all sufficient, full of mercy, and love. That HE cares for me and will never let me go. And God created me with strength and dignity. He is enthralled with my beauty and no matter what, outward beauty, a husband, a ton of friends, a great career and ministry; he sees me and is absolutely head-over-heels in love with me. That’s so encouraging.


    Liberty U

  9. 59
    Pattygarv says:

    WOW! Sometimes I really wish I liked coffee…. It just sounds like so much fun!
    Alas, I only like tea, and not even exotic tea at that!! Just gimme some sugar and LOTS of ice!!!
    Oh, well…. on to the reading

  10. 60
    Kristi says:

    Rogersville, TN

    1. I would say most of my life I have been an eight or nine. I have let fear dominate my life in one form or another. I am happy to say that over the past couple of year it has dropped maybe to a six or seven. I’m still not where I need to be.
    The part of this chapter that resonated with me was the part about “What will I do if..” being the wrong question. I will try my best to always try to remember to ask “What will God do if”. God has gotten me through so much I should never doubt but know that I will let human fear creep in again.

    2.It is so awesome how every part of God’s Word fits together for each season of our life. Since I done my first Bible Study ,Psalms of Ascent, I have tried to have to attitude of I’m only passing through. No matter what this life has in store for me, I have a much better home awaiting me one day. We are currently doing Daniel at my church. My homework last night kind of summed up what this book did for me. “Fear God and nothing else and you will experience something other people only read about.” I think this goes so well with the last paragraph of chapter 17.
    I hope to take away from this to treat all people as people and not size them up, to trust God to bring my through my insecurities in every situation, and to give it all to Him. Let Him take care of it and let my job be to serve Him in every way I can.

  11. 61
    Fran McCurry says:

    The main thing I am taking from this great book is an affirmation of how far I have come in dealing with fear and insecurity as well as wonderful new spiritual tools in continuing to deal with the two.

    Today, I would say my fear factor is a 4 or 5; twelve years ago, a solid 10. (My testimony gives a few clues as to the why of that.) But, in Bible verse after verse, in Bible study after Bible study (mostly yours, Beth, with others by H. Blackaby & J. Rothschild), in hearing praise & worship song after song, I have heard Jesus telling me I am His, and, yes, I am clothed in dignity and strength.

    Last night in “Here and Now, There and Then” you had us settle the thing once and for all that we are saved! Having just finished reading SLI, I walked out of that session singing to the Lord, “Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I’m Yours”!

    We do have an amazing spiritual community here on the blog. I adore you all. And I will be there with so many of you on April 24- I have been looking forward to that for quite a while!

    Gulf Shores
    Single again

  12. 62
    Jenn H says:

    Thank you so much. I received Christ into my life again today after I finished SLI. I’ve been trying to get back for so long, and this finally did it. Thank you.

  13. 63
    tcal says:

    Lol!!! Where is week 7?…I found 8. I’m behind like two weeks

  14. 64
    Jennifer says:

    MPls, MN

    1) 7-8 I have a fear of failing, myself, my parents, God,my husband and that In their disappointment they will turn away from me. Which I know is kind of silly because I know that God will never leave or forsake me.

    2) I think one thing of God that I will take away is the Dignity and Strength come from God and nobody can take it from me, it’s not theirs to take.

  15. 65
    Sandy says:

    Durant, OK

    I zoomed through the book, by having Beth read it to me as I drove, but now I feel behind, because I didn’t get to take the time to respond the last 2 weeks.
    I’ll just try to put the answers to last week’s questions all in one answer to the answer to #2 this week.

    #1-Like others, I’m not sure how to rate my fear on a number scale, but I guess it’s about 6. I don’t know what specifically that I’m afraid of, and I always know that I should be trusting God (Proverbs 3:5-6), but my loved ones are always telling me that I worry too much, so I guess I’m afraid of all those things Beth listed on page 322.

    First, I have to tell you, that since I had already listened to the whole book, before you told us to quit reading ahead, maybe it’s a good thing that I’m now on week 3 of discussing it with a few women at church, so maybe since I still don’t feel completely secure now, maybe I’ll feel more secure after doing it with them. I realized that I said the word “maybe” 3 times in that long sentence!
    So, besides all the obvious blessings we have all received from the book, EVERY CHAPTER,
    it reiginited my passion to help my grown daughter overcome HER Insecurities and to help other grown women, teenage girls, and all of God’s little girls!
    That is my passion.
    So, that is why I am facilitating a discussion group of this book on Wednesday nights. Since beginning that group, I have felt insecure about that!
    That is why I bought the book for my beautiful, 20 year old daughter who is studying hard in college to become a Christian counselor and also, has the desire to someday be a Christian Wife and Mom. I just hope she can take the time to read it soon. She knows that her “love language” is “words of affirmation”, and that she is insecure, although she knows that she is wonderfully and fearfully made!
    That is why I work with 1st-3rd grade girls on Wed. nights and go to youth camp in the summer and do other groups with the middle school and high school girls.
    That is why I pray for my daughter (and my sons) everyday.
    That is also why I pray that I, myself, will be more secure and stronger for them!
    Thank you so much, Beth!
    (Wish I could go to a simulcast of this!)

  16. 66
    Diana A says:

    Oh gosh sometimes it’s hard to share, especially dumb-moments. Fear got sooooo out of control, one day a couple years ago I had a shower, the bathroom naturally fogged up, I wear glasses(not in shower); I came out and this thing came at me, I swiped (and missed), and it just kept coming at me, of course not seeing it for what is was and because I was so not prepared for an visitors in the room with me, I screamed! and then the fear took over and I kept screaming, getting louder and more hysterical and more crazy, until finally my husband came in (by the way what took so long?) and he gently let the moth out. Yup all that over a moth. That day was probably a 12+. (Did I mention we lived in a townhouse?). That was probably the day I decided I needed help. So God sent me a cd with teaching on fear from a famous speaker- yup Beth Moore. There was a total 5 cds on a Beautiful Mind. I began some healing that day, I can confidently say I am way more better than that, but still got some to go. I think I will need more God intervention, but my fear level is down to probably a managable 4 – most of the time. Moths you have been put on notice!
    The part that resonates for me is the whole choice of determining to trust God to take care of us no matter what. Sometimes trusting God means taking no further action.
    I was a single mom for awhile and I got “visitors” at my front door at 2 in the morning and they were there with harm in the intention and the pounding on my door did not ease my heart. So there has been real scary situations in my life, but it took a moth to make me realize how much power I had given to fear.

    What I will take away from this book mostly is that it is a learning process to un-learn some bad habits, ideas, responses, and learn to put my energy into trusting God with all areas of my life. To really take to heart that God owns my security and He wants me to thrive in my life and not merely survive. Besides I now have 2 awesome prayers I can use again and again and hopefully will get to a point where I look less to the prayers to get me out of a bad situation, out of a bout of insecurity.

    Girl I am soooo looking forward to April 24th, we got 36 lovely women coming to meet together to share life with you. We are out in Surrey, at Bible Fellowship come join us – girls from the lowermainland!

    Surrey, BC Canada

    • 66.1
      Sandy says:

      Diana, You are so right, “it is a learning process”. That is why we have to keep opening Beth’s book and God’s Book to “un-learn some bad habits, bad ideas and bad responses and learn to put my energy into trusting God in all areas of my life.”

  17. 67
    Regina says:

    Moberly, MO

    1. I’m somewhere between an 8 and a 9. I’ve got a lot of fear, but occasionally bust through it. Fear has made me do a lot of dumb things, and it has robbed me of too many opportunities.

    Last month, in response to one of the blogs, I wrote “NO INTIMIDATION ZONE” on my wall calendar at work. I don’t know if anyone saw it, and I kept hoping someone would ask so I could mention SLI. April 1 I had to flip the page. And I wrote a reminder to myself right over the lovely picture: “I am a mighty woman of God. God gave me security, and no one and nothing can take it away. I get to keep it. I am clothed with strength and dignity.”

    2. If nothing else, God and I are taking away the concept of “clothed with strength and dignity.” I’m actually reaching out and building relationships with the women in my office, even if it’s nothing more than doing 8 Minute Abs or Biggest Loser Yoga together over a break. It has given me some opportunities to encourage others. (Cindy, if you happen to be reading this, I’m praying your surgery went well today! See you soon, sista!)

    I have finished this book just when I needed it, and just when, perhaps, my church needs it. Our pastor is leaving us (on a high note, but God’s got some new marching orders for him), and April 18 is his last Sunday. April 23, 4 of us are heading up to the SLI simulcast in Macon, MO. I can’t wait, even though the time between now and then is going to be a crazy crazy schedule with a family trip, a business trip, a farewell weekend packed full of activity and the nuttiness of trying to catch up after being away…But, LORD help me, I’m not afraid of it. He’s done so much amazing stuff so far that I can’t wait to see what’s next!

  18. 68
    Theresa says:

    50 something

    Hello Siestas!
    I just found out that I will have ( I reckon I should say that I “get to teach”) to teach my Sunday School class this Sunday…unexpected. So…I will have to finish reading our book and respond to the questions next week. We will be studying Revelation 4 & 5…eghads!!!

  19. 69
    Tammy says:

    1. Fear has played a large part in my life. At times it definitely hit a 10. I am happy to say it is now just a bit player for the most part. As I have learned to trust the Lord, I realize trust and fear are opposites. Over and over the Lord tells us to fear not in scripture. It is our enemy that would defeat us and paralyze us through various fears. It is one of the devils favorite weapons, but I can overcome it through trust in the Lord and the truth of his word.

    2. Reading the book really opened my eyes. I thought I had a handle on my insecurities, but there were many hidden areas where I have been attacked and didn’t even realize it. It has lit a fire under me and made me want to expose the lies of insecurity that haunt so many of us. I have passed on my book to a friend and bought tickets for my sisters and me to attend the simulcast on April 24th. I want the truth to set others free as it has me.

    Lusby, MD

  20. 70
    Sarah says:

    Wow. Thank you for listening to the HS as He prompted you to write this book, Mama Siesta! 🙂

    I have to say I laughed out loud (even in my apt by myself) with the SIL car wash story…poor thing!

    OK, here goes (from Sarah, 30’s, single, Dallas, TX):

    1) I would say about 6. I have a vivid imagination and have (like you, Mama Siesta), allowed myself to “go there” in my fears oftentimes. I would say the “God: can you trust ME?” got me the most. I have feared (and still do) several major things in life, but the most overriding one that continues to gain hold as I age is the fear of being alone…forever (single, never married, haven’t dated in way too long…) All this time all I’ve needed is to Trust my Father. I’ve made it far too hard. Thanks for showing me that!

    2) I would say that firstly, I’m aware I have insecurities (I started reading SLI ‘cuz it was on the blog, not ‘cuz I thought I “needed it”.) HA! Little did I know! I think this book came at the right time. I have been making some needed major changes in my life during these past couple months and the book really helped me to see that one of the reasons I’m so hesitant of change is insecurity. This book has given me the Truth I need to strengthen me to embrace who God created me to be. Who I am now, not who I wish I was or what I wished I looked like or what I’ve dreamed of always being (but am not)…He has made me this way and He has chosen (at least for now) to not give me what I think I’ve waited my whole life for (husband and child). Regardless of what is in the future (or isn’t), I feel stronger and equipped now to take His hand and face it. I need not look to others or to food to find my strength/coping mechanism/SECURITY…He is my Strong Tower and it’s high time I got out of His way and allowed Him to show Himself mighty in the dark corners of my heart.

    Thank you again. What a blessing SLI has been. I am going to type out the prayer at the end (I absolutely can NOT cut the page out of the book!) and put it on my mirror (a place I highly dislike looking at) to be reminded of the truth.

    Love you!


  21. 71
    Mirra says:

    When Buffy responed about you ripping off your book cover , my mind also began to spin on ideas of what might happen to that cover.
    What if that cover got stuck under the floor mat and your car was stolen. The robber might find it as he stripped the car for parts and became curious as to what the book was about. He reads the book and repents of his wayward ways.
    One more thought. What if your cover flew out the window and lands face first on the windshield of a women on her way to drive over a cliff. She stops to remove the cover from the windshield and decides to give the book a read as a last chance.
    Sorry for digessing from the insecurity questions,but when my imagination takes over it seems to have a mind of it’s own. I haven’t read the last chapters yet,and will respond when I have (:-)

  22. 72
    Martha says:

    I’m calling you sweet…….will post assignment later.

  23. 73
    Roseanna Dubinski says:

    Again, I’d like to say you make me chuckle, Beth!!! And, oh how we need to chuckle these days. Praise God for sisters like you who keep us laughing and loving Jesus!!!

  24. 74
    Katie says:


    Okay I have to answer part of number 2 now! So today I went grocery shopping. At the second store the cashiers were talking I guess I was distracted- anyhow I got my receipt and pushed my empty cart out of the store. I got half way out to my car and looked down. I realized I had no groceries- however I didn’t know where they were. It took me a minute but I finally I figured out they were sitting inside on the conveyer belt waiting for me to put them in the bags!! I wanted to get in my car and run away! But I told my self my security is mine, It came from God, not from what those total strangers think of me. So I marched back in the store, found my groceries and bagged them up!

    • 74.1
      Sandy says:

      Great job!!! 🙂

    • 74.2
      Mariah says:

      awesome…I could totally see that happening to me!!!

    • 74.3
      Maryount says:

      LOL!!! When I was reading your post half way through I glanced up at your age. LOL!! Because as you get older this kind of stuff happens all the time. And we just hold our heads up and act like what just happened is the norm. LOL!! So you go girl, and wear your God given strength and dignity with security. ♥♥♥

  25. 75

    Albuquerque NM

    Chapter 17- My fear level is between an 8-9 I feel my fear comes from my childhood and the abuse I had when I was little, but anyway I have missed some great oppurtunites from God due to plan old fear and I am kicking myself in the seat of my pants for not trusting God to take care me when He had made the paths straight and I did not trust Him. I kept listening to chapter 4 in Esther talking about fear that in the bible it says 365 times (Do Not Be Afraid ) I thought I can do this with Christ and then the day came and fear overtook my security I did not listen to the Lord or trust the Lord enough to get me thru it. Oh that day I wish I would have stood to my feet stronger than ever and let the Lord Reign.

    What I liked the best is ( She is clothed with strength and dignity she can laugh at the days to come
    Also on page 330 in chapter17
    Carol will have no fear of bad news, Carol heart is steadfast trusting in the Lord, Carol heart is secure, Carol will have no fear; in the end, Carol will look in triumph on Carol foes. Psalm 112:7-8

    I need to memorize that because currently I take care of my 85yr old mother she has alot of health problems and everytime I call her and she does not answer the phone I think the worst has happen or if she does not look well or it could be a number of things I just pray and ask God for the strength to get thru whatever I will face at one point in my life with my mom and the strength to go on with Him in my life.

    Thanks Sweet Thing for doing this journey with us seista’s I am glad that you wrote the book I am hoping to be a better person for it and thank you for continuing to allow the Lord to work thru you and being a humble servant. You go girl you Rock and thank you Amanda and Melissa for sharing your mom with us seista’s you all are awesome women and I love you all to pieces.

    By the way seista mama you are to funny when I read about the cover of the book being torn off I laughed then I thought why would she do that then I read another comment and she had said she knew why because your picture was on the front cover.
    Thanks for all you do


    I need to memorize that verse

    • 75.1
      Beth says:

      Laughing. YES, it was because of the picture. I didn’t think about our sisters not getting that. Imagine how ridiculous that would look!

      You guys bring me joy.

      • Tina says:

        LOL Carol! I had the exact same thought. But…silly me! Sometimes it takes me a while to catch on to some things…I’m the one usually laughing at the joke later…once I get it:)

      • Retta says:

        LoL! Oh I get it now…LoL again!! I was wondering… ‘Why would she do that and why would she share it with us…she’s suppose to be our example of security…why would she be insecure about her own book about overcoming insecurity?’ But I get it you were concerned someone would be like, ‘Wait, the chick on the cover looks exactly like the person reading the book, what she forget what she said?’ Or ‘did she not really write the book and now has to go back and read what “she wrote”?’ oh Beth LoL you crack me up…I laughed when I read you ripped the cover off I was just confused as to why.

  26. 76
    Gritsgirl721 says:

    To say that fear has played a huge role in my life would be a major understatement!!! I have a family history of OCD (perfectionism). I don’t tend to worry over things, I tend to obsess over them until they are solved. I can panic, not be able to eat, break out in a sweat. Yes, fear has controlled me many times more in my life than I wish it would have, esp. where relationships are concerned. My early life was built on insecure relationships, wondering if my parents were going to stay together or abandon my brother and me. Being the oldest, I took more of the “burden” than my brother. Then because my father was more passive, I held a lot of fear in my relationships to men. What I’m taking with me out of this study has been a “taste” of what it looks like to “really trust God period.” I’m discovering for the first time truly that God wants me to have strength and dignity-HIS!! I pray that prayer at the end of the book almost everyday. It’s helping me along with my quiet time to really believe what God believes about me. WOW!! I honestly can’t fully express here in words what God has done for me in my healing over the past months of doing Breaking Free and reading this book- it’s just wonderful beyond words. I praise Him continually and cannot live one moment without His power, presence, and love flowing through my life.
    Thank you again Beth for serving our God,
    You influence is “life-lasting!!” 🙂

    Amanda, 40’s, divorced
    Olive Branch, MS

    • 76.1
      Retta says:

      I must recommend “Believing God” another one of Beth’s…a bible study though. I did it by myself without the videos and it helped so very much. (One day I’ll get my hands on the videos and go through it again.*wink*)

      • Maryount says:

        Amanda, I too recommend Beth’s bible study “Believing God”. That study changed my life and walk with the Lord. When I accepted who I was before the Lord, MANY insecurities just went away. Keep running the race and Trust God. Period! 🙂

  27. 77
    Lynne says:

    It is bittersweet to reach the end of this discussion group ~ if ever there was a demonstration of how good we women can be to one another, it has been demonstrated by the tenderness with which the most difficult sharing has been received, heard and ministered to, Siesta to Siesta. I am honored to have been a part of the honest, no holds bared, open-hearted sharing that has gone on throughout this blog.

    ’nuff said . . .on to the questions . . .

    1. On a scale of 1-10 how big a part has fear played in my life? Well . . before my divorce in ’99 I’d say probably easily an 8-9. Then the worst thing I’d imagined happened! My husband of 30 years was unfaithful, in “love’ with another woman and wanted a divorce. It felt like my life was ending! However, what happened next showed me God’s hand in my life ‘plain as the nose on my face’. It is a pure ‘God thing’ that made me able to honestly say a decade later, my fear factor is a measly 2-3 now.

    Short, but true story here – I went from my father’s house to a university dorm to my husband’s house so when at 50 I was suddenly alone in my own place (kids grown and gone and me newly divorced living in the first house I’d ever owned), I distinctly remember one night lying awake rigid with fear as I listened to the various noises the house made in the windy night. What were those noises? Were they noises that meant the roof was not ok? That the house would fail in some way I couldn’t fix? That . . .well, no doubt you get the drift of the thoughts with which the Adversary was tormenting me. All of a sudden a thought that was SO not from me (or the Adversary), came into my head saying “Haven’t you always thought of yourself as a woman of faith? The opposite of faith is fear. So why aren’t you acting like a faith-filled woman instead of cringing here in fear?? I am here and you are safe in my arms.” I relaxed and drifted off to sleep.

    That is what I remind myself every time I feel afraid. I now see fear as a good indication that there’s a faith lesson in whatever is scaring me and prayerfully move toward it . . seeing it as taking my Master’s hand and walking out on the water to Him.

    2. I take “I am clothed in strength and dignity” with me — hopefully to my grave — so “can laugh at the days to come”, steadfastly trusting that my Lord and Savior lives and cares about me.

    I ‘ll close sending a BIG thank you to you, Beth, and your team for this wonderful ministry! I am thrilled to have tickets for the conference you are doing with Kay and Priscilla in Denver in June. My daughter and I are looking forward to seeing you there :>)

    Lynne, 61 married in Oregon

    • 77.1
      Sandy says:

      Lynne, your whole response was just so touching and encouraging.
      Yes, it is bittersweet when this comes to an end!
      I didn’t say in my response, but Beth’s reminder to us to continualy quote “I am clothed in strength and dignity” and “can laugh at the days to come” has helped me a lot, too.
      Thank you again Beth, and all of your team,
      and all of the Siestas for taking part!

  28. 78
    Anna Mitchell says:

    age 30-ish
    Tyler, Texas

    1. level of fear- 8/10. Even in moments where I wasn’t riveted with fear- worry & anxiety have been constants in my life. So much so, that when I’ve done the “mental inventory” in my mind, and all seems well, I worry- for I must’ve missed something or the perverbial shoe must be preparing to drop any minute. What resonated with me in this chapter was the conversation God walked you through– “if you’re going to imagine it, go all the way through it- then what.” That was very interesting to me.
    I did that with my greatest fear- the thing that can keep me awake at night. And just like you said, Ms. Beth, it’s ugly when you start the process in your mind but in the end I resolved I would be on my knees, calling and loving my Lord- the only One who could help me through that unimaginable situation.

    2. What am I taking away from this journey? That we are all broken and inscecure in some place: men and women, alike. To truly approach others with love and graciousness–even those that I would think could have NO insecurity remotely in them–with love and graciousness, even more so. And in those moments where my own security feels like it’s being attacked, I will forever remember and call on these words: “I am clothed with strength and dignity.”

    Side note: I am so bummed! Bummed! Buuuuummmmmmmd!
    I live in a town of 100,000 people and not ONE single church in this lovely town is hosting your simulcast! I know! I gasped, too! It was going to be the exclamation point to my journey through this book. I get all tight liped just thinking about it. Bummed.

  29. 79
    Lisa H. says:

    Hi Beth,

    I havent read SLI yet but it is on my list of want to read’s! I couldnt help but answer this question you asked re. how big a part has fear been a part of your life? My answer would be about 15!!! I’ve been asked this question–why are you so afraid of….. fill in the blank? Most recently its been fear of talking to a psychologist about my feelings/fears/hurts/anger/ my past/my mother/my divorce etc. etc. etc. I HATE talking to people about me. Fear and anxiety overtake me completely. So I cant wait to get into this book. I just finished another study by Rick Warren–PDL–so now maybe I can start SLI!


  30. 80
    Andrea S. says:

    My sweet Beth-
    Oh my word- my family is looking at me in that insane way they do when I am laughing my head off at something on this blog! Your coffee descriptions threw me OVER THE EDGE- but God is so good! I needed just a good long, teary laugh! Days in our house this past week have been teary for other reasons. Our family is going through a rough spell right now. My beautiful step kiddos are really struggling with some things with their biological momma….and it’s heart breaking for my husband and I to have to sit back and watch the hurt. But I keep telling them that sometimes God just simply asks us to go through it. It has also been very clear to me this week that they are following my lead and I need to keep leading by example and telling them that this is not the way I would have chosen to work this thing out, but that I am trusting in my God because he is SO capable to move this mountain for us and he has our beginnings and our endings in his hands….AMEN. So please all my dear siestas keep us in your prayers.

    Love you all dearly!

    PS: These last weeks I have struggled to keep up/catch up with my SLI readings…but I will finish this thing girls…even if a little late!

  31. 81
    Crystal says:

    I’m actually going to answer last week’s questions first – I couldn’t figure out how to go back and add them them to the old blog post. I’ll be back then to answer the new ones, sorry about that.

    1. The person in my life who is worth doing what it takes to live abundantly in Christ is my new niece, Isabella. She will be three months old this month and has completely taken my heart. Big brown eyes, cute half Korean, half Caucasian features – she is going to be a beauty! But I want to be more than the fun aunt – I want to help her to grow up strong in Christ, knowing where her strength and dignity come from. I can only imagine how I’ll feel with my own kids!

    2. This week I have been having a “nobody’s clapping and everybody’s a competitor” type week (pg. 278). In one situation specifically, I know I can stop depersonalizing a woman at work who I feel threatened by – and stop caring if she does it in return! I will act with God given dignity and strength and begin to pray for her, that God would bless her richly. I have faith that what may begin as words from my mouth will eventually become words from my heart.

    3. Right now God has put children on my heart. My niece, having my own, and interestingly, sponsoring a Compassion child. I have the honor of promoting Compassion as the manager of CrimsonDoor Ministries, and my husband and I just sponsored the most amazing little 5 year old boy in Mexico. I can’t explain to people enough how amazing this organization is, and I just love knowing that we’re helping Miguel, while he’s blessing us!

  32. 82
    AmyB says:

    I wasn’t going to comment since I haven’t read the entire book. Actually I haven’t bought the book either, but this afternoon I read chapter 17 sitting in the bookstore. I went straight to that chapter because I am at the end of the two hardest weeks I’ve been through in a long time. Fear has reared its ugly head seemingly out of nowhere. Fear that someone will break into this single girl’s home. It’s held me down in absolute terror, afraid to be alone, unable to sleep. In reading the chapter on fear, Beth spoke the question God has had on my heart this entire time – Do I really trust God? Do I trust Him to be there if my fears do become reality? His love for me is so immense why would I doubt that He would be there to protect me and care for me? He is my Shepherd and my Father. He promises to never leave me as an orphan. He will come to me. Being paralyzed by fear and doubt is no longer an option. I am choosing to trust God even if I have to choose to trust moment by moment.




  33. 83
    Kathy says:

    My rate has ranged from 5-10 depending on the issue and situation throughout my life.

    I have come to believe that only God’s supernatural power and love can cleanse and heal what is in wounded in my natural state. I love your quote changing “What will I do if?” to What will God do if…….. Trust is a huge issue for me. With the help of a very Godly couple in ministry, I have prayed that whatever wounds that became “infected” during my life’s journey will/are being cleansed and healed through the power of Christ. I believe the evil one wants to hold us captive to areas like insecurity so that be will never fully experience the abundant life while on this earth. I do not want to be “driven” by my ego but led by my Savior.

    God Bless you dear Beth and all your loved ones. Thank you for taking the time and interest to walk us through your “divine” book. Kathy, Austin

  34. 84

    Mama Beth–Thank you sooo much!! This has been an amazing experience! This is not just a blog, but a Sisterhood of Christ Followers that have come to mean so much to me!!! I want to send a special thank you to your family– Sometimes we forget how much they sacrifice so we can have some time with our Siesta Mama– THANK YOU Keith, Amanda, Melissa & Family!

    FEAR.. wow.. what a huge part it has played in my life!! In fact, it’s played center stage for my 29..ok 33 years (see, I AM more secure..hehe)! I’d have to give it a 10 for sure! In fact, it has been the monster that feeds my insecurity! Through this journey, I’ve learned that it keeps me up at night, it holds me back from the amazing plans that God has for me, and until recently it has even kept me from trusting Him.. I mean REALLY trusting Him! But with His help, I am now slaying those giants that have stood in my way for so long!!! They’re still BIG and SCARY, and they might even chase me down.. but I TRUST my God who is ALWAYS with me. Period. So, what am I taking with me.. from this incredible journey?? Less baggage, that’s for sure! A few good friends.. and a more SECURE me! Who knew?! Thank you! Can’t wait for the next adventure here in Siestaville


  35. 85
    Tina says:

    OOPS! My teenage daughter just helped me figure it out. I’m not even going to say what the issue was. Let’s just say…yes, I am BLONDE, naturally. LOL! At least I can now read everyone’s posts! WAHOO!

  36. 86
    Valerie says:

    When I bought the book and sent off my email to 40 of my dearest friends saying “let’s read Beth’s book on insecurity” I did so without a fleeting thought. I love Beth and Jesus even more so I knew it would be a fun journey and surely there was something more to learn. I also loved the blog idea which was totally new to me.
    I didn’t think of myself as insecure but when I read the chapter on how insecurity was really fear it made me sit down and write out my “victory day” testimony.
    In September of 2009 I had felt a huge weight on my shoulders after praying with some friends. I kept hearing the words of the enemy telling me I wasn’t very good at praying and maybe I should just leave the group. I knew it wasn’t God’s voice and that I was hearing lies but I didn’t know how to rid myself of the insecurity that was heavy on my shoulders. I was miserable.
    The next morning God showed me that I had allowed fear into my life and that fear was not from Him. I cried in the shower as I told Him all the things I was afraid of and as the shower and my tears ran over me I felt His grace and mercy wash over me too. I repented to God that I believed the lies of my enemy and asked for forgiveness. That was it – full release, forever.
    I was freed from things that I never thought would be possible – things I didn’t even tell God about that morning. Victory over all of it. Praise You, Jesus!
    Of course there are areas I still need to work on. Making me write in the cover of my book nearly put me over the edge! Nearly everyday I find I need to claim victory over something. I usually recite Gal 5:1 or just say “victory” in my head when fears arise. Many days I just jump to out-right singing it – “Oh, victory in Jesus, my Savior, forever…” it helps to have my Travis Cottrell’s CD playing! This voice will only be glorious in Heaven!
    What I will take with me from this book– chapter 7 – remembering things I’ve done out of insecurity that made a fool out of me. I can’t believe that was really me! Also, the call to see to it that others know there is freedom from insecurity in Christ and especially to mirror that for my precious daughter.
    Thank you to all that worked so hard on getting this up and running. It was a great journey with so many women that have a heart for Jesus.
    I’ll see you in September, Beth! I’ve booked the hotel already!
    married – 30’s
    Farmington, MN

  37. 87
    DeniseK says:

    Okay, so I had to add this to my previous comment. I had talked about depression overtaking my soul, in ways that some people, thankfully, may never relate to. I fight constantly with the enemy, not allowing dignity to be taken away from me. I know the Lord has graciously given it to me, through Jesus Christ. This journey deserves more than depression!! I believe with everything within me, that I need to learn from every radical emotion that is in my heart, and make it work for God’s greater good. How can I use this to help other sisters?… I know the Lord will pull me through this, and I will NOT give up on His beautiful everlasting love. Beth, you have given me a reason to try understand other women, and realize that we ALL need to feel loved. ANd we all need to feel worthy of God’s love. Telling ourselves we are worthless, is letting the enemy win our souls…I pray, with the Spirit within me, WE stomp on him!! God has done too many precious things in my life, to not have security. This book opened my eyes not only to the lack of esteem in my own heart, but in so many other women and men around me. I have more compassion and grace to give to those that are especially difficult to give it to. You know what I am talking about! I dont want fear to paralyze God’s praise-worthy works in me, so I will Trust God, and not give into the fear of my thoughts. In His precious Name and Grace…I will Praise and Worship Him all the days of my life!

  38. 88

    Well, this is kinda crazy… or just God’s timing… It’s apparently been longer than I realized since I last visited your blog, and I had no idea about SLI. Shucks! But I arrived tonight because I’ve just finished a post on my blog that mentions your Stepping Up Bible study, and I wanted to make sure I had you linked right. (Again about the timing… good thing I actually checked!) Well, my post (which is almost the last after over a year of blogging) is all about my passions, my fears, and my life-messes, and my journey through Psalm 126 in Stepping Up has to do with it. So imagine my astonishment when I click over here to see you in the midst of an ongoing discussion about passions and fears! Well, dear Beth, I can truly say that I am a better person and am closer to God because of the group of women that I have met with and gone through numerous Bible studies with over the past 2 1/2 years, and that we have certainly enjoyed and been blessed by every one of your studies we’ve done. I absolutely love it that God has given you the task of fighting (in His name!) the epidemic of insecurity that plagues the women of this world. [Would you take it the right way if I said you have the perfect mouth for it? ;)]
    julie 🙂

  39. 89
    Retta says:

    1. Before “Believing God” it could get up to 10 no problem several times a day without cause. Now after SLI Satan has a time getting a 2 out of me. Psalm 27:1 comes to mind. Of course it’s the chapter God has me memorizing this year so its fresh on my mind for more reasons than just one.

    The LORD is my light and my salvation;
    Whom shall I fear?
    The LORD is the defense of my life;
    Whom shall I dread?

    2. I’ve always for some reason just accepted life was/is tough… that it is hard… and I felt there was nothing you could do about it, but just deal with it. The better able you were a dealing with “life” the more secure you are/were. But now I know the better grounded you are in Christ the more He is able to deal with “life” for and through you…this is true unshakable security.

    Father, thank You for sending Jesus, and, Jesus, thank You for hanging my sins upon Your cross. But most of all thank You for concurring death and living in me, through me, and for me. Help me to never do anything that You would regret the love, pain and suffering You’ve had to endure for my worthless sake. I’m so very grateful, Lord. Help me to do Your will, empower me to be bold in my life for You. In Your name, Jesus, I pray-amen

  40. 90
    Corrine says:

    Hi Beth, I am a big fan of yours and your work. I finished the book yesterday and thought it was wonderful. I had read the first few chapters and had to put the book down for a few days because I had to think about things. then i picked it up a few days ago and could not put it down. I have come to realize that fear had played a 8 in my life. to prove my point to day my husband and i went Snow Meaching and he likes to mountain climb and I like to trail ride. he just happened to tell me ths morning i am inttmidated by mountain climbing. anyway we got up there and i just followed him and of course on my first try I rolled my sled but got up and tried again and mad it. i climbed half way up the mountain and as i was i realized that i had no FEAR I knew that GOD had answered my prayers and helping me with my issues. I will no longer let fear rule my life. THANK YOU BETH FOR THIS BOOK.

  41. 91
    Cassie says:

    1) I would have to say 10. I fear disappointing others, being talked about or hurting their feelings so I sit back and don’t say anything to cause waves.Just the other day I was with my husbands family, totally stressed out by potty training my son, as well as pleasing my mil with moving out of state to be closer to them.At my witz end I snap totally go postal on the person who sends me over the edge and storm out leaving. The next morning I call to apologize and they want to bring up things that were out of my control that I had nothing to do with. Then I sit and dwell on it for several days letting the enemy rob me of my security, knowing I was not very Christ like. How can I be used in a womens ministry??? When I can not even interact with family. So allowing myself to want to with drawl from society and block human kind out in every area of my life. Just what Satan wants me to do, b/c he is threatened by me.
    2)My new years resolution was to see others through His eyes this book has shown me that girls who show off to much skin is a form of insecurities, totally changed how I see them.
    Totally blessed because of this book, stretched out of my comfort zone but knowing with God all things are possible and to not let the enemy rob me of my joy. Excited to begin my journey in women’s ministries.

  42. 92
    T in Nebraska says:

    I am not sure when I will get back to this blog, but I need to tell all of you and especially Beth, thank you for this journey. It has come at a good time to build my strength in Him. I leave tomorrow to join my family and to say my good-byes to my grandmother. Normally something like this would shake my world and leave me very insecure. I know it will be difficult but I can already sense that I God will be able to shine brighter through me as I go to minister to my family.

    Thanks for the prayers that I already feel being said. May ask that you pray for my son as he is not that secure and I have to trust that he will be safe while I am gone.

    Catch up with everyone soon.

    40 single-mom

  43. 93
    Lori says:

    Dear Beth,

    I wanted to respond to this post just to say that I fell off the bandwagon with keeping up w/the readings, etc. (have started and stopped reading the book more than once — I think it may be the Enemy distracting me) — not sure, but want to thank you so much for this book. I started (again) reading it today, and am determined to finish it. I am guessing it is probably to late to go back and respond to all the questions. But I want you to know I am intending on going back and answering them myself anyway.

    Your passion for God’s Word is contagious. Thank you for being His vessel and doing what He’s called you to do. This world needs it so much. There are so many women out there who are blessed, encouraged, comforted, etc., by it.

    So I just wanted to respond to let you know that I do have the book and am indeed intending on finishing it out. Thanks again —

  44. 94
    aussie monica says:

    fear permeates a lot of life. It shouldn’t. “Perfect love casts out fear”. Jesus’ love is perfect. the more I rely on Him, the more my fear should dissipate.

    this book has been incredible in opening up the realisation that we, as women, all have basically the SAME insecurities and we need to stop judging and criticising each other. we need to LOVE one another in the PERFECT LOVE of CHRIST! And that’s what I am endeavouring to do!

    m w 4 kids
    Sydney Australia

  45. 95
    Evie says:

    I have been blessed by the fact that fear has not played a major role in my life. On a scale of 1 to 10 i’d have to give it a 2 perhaps.

    After reading your book I am much more keen in noticing when I’m about to go down the insecurity path. I make a quick halt ask myself a few questions and CHOOSE a different path.

    I have really enjoyed this study; thank you Beth and as always how blessed we are to have you as our ministry teacher.

  46. 96
    Gulley says:

    You are so sweet! 🙂

  47. 97
    Katie says:


    1. I think fear has played a significant role in my life. Maybe a 8- I have not done things because I was afraid and worried way to much. I think the biggest thing for me out of the chapter was thinking out our fears and what if those things happened. That was huge for me. To realize that if the thing I feared the most happened then God would be here with me walking me threw it and I would make it out on the other side!

    2. I think I will be different. I will remind myself of those scriptures, and remember that I am clothed in strength and dignity that no one can take away. I am on the way to becoming a secure woman, so isn’t tied down be pleaseing everyone. I love that God has given us strength and dignity! That makes me love him more!! 🙂 Thanks for writing this book and for being so transparent.

  48. 98
    Ann says:

    Fear….how it controls one has so many different levels…yes…fear of not measuring up to what a parent requires, then how to deal with that when you don’t. Then as you get older (62)having knowledge of that parent, seeing their weakness, their sin that was unknown to me as a child, its overwhelming once your surrendered to God these acknowledgments of fear & that you want to be an overcomer & live His plan….there is much, MUCH freedom. How I praise Him & His patience with me as I traveled in the ditch of doing things my way. WHY does it take so long for our eyes to be opened? God’s timing in using our past to Glorify Him…His way, His plan=Freedom. I give Him all my Praise.

  49. 99
    kirsten plekan says:

    #1. I would have to say 10 for most if my life. That’s a sad fact.I have been driven by “what ifs” and seen recently if God truly is in control, I need to stop thinking I need to control everything around me to avoid getting hurt.Too many things in my very early years hurt me that I absolutely couldn’t do anything about. I allowed this to shape me. Jesus was there all along. Loving me. Protecting me from worse.
    #2. I have faced the rational roots of irrational fears. My past is not my present. At this point, I know that I am Christ’s and that He is with me. I am taking my dignity back.I might not laugh at the days to come yet, but I sure don’t fear them anymore!

  50. 100
    donna kennedy says:

    Dear Beth,
    So Long Insecurity has literally set this captive free. I’ve been married for thirty four years, and 17 years ago my husband committed adultery. We separated for a year, and in that year God revealed what grace and mercy truely were. He also gave me a formula of seven “up” words to get through the healing process. Words like: “look up”…”chin up”….”grow up”…”own up”…”shut up”…”give up”…and “open up.” Anyway,for the last year I’ve been putting this formula, if you will, into a teaching seminar, and have about eight chapters about it in book format.
    Though our marriage is very strong, I still fight with the ever present threat of insecuritiy, like two tom cats in the barn yard. I have begged God over and over again to give me back that tremendous confidence I once had…yet it eludes me like tight firm skin on a seventy year old face. Then came Chapter sixteen, where your daughter journaled about her mission trip. When she asked God to, “keep the emotional wounds that were carved during the past few weeks from healing”…”that time wouldn’t heal”, as she never wanted to forget…to become indifferent…BINGO!
    It was like God turned on one of those million candle watt flashlights that are ten inches in diameter, and pointed it into the dark cavern of my soul. For the first time ever I knew that the reason the scars weren’t completely smoothed over and healed, was because I would lose my empathy and my ministry. I would lose the ability and profound desire to help woman recover from the assult of adultery on their marriages. If God had totally healed the wounds, I would have closed that door, like a storage closet that’s full of memories we don’t ever care to re-visit, and that would have been the end of it. However, that hasn’t been the case. I revisit that closet constantly as He puts struggling woman in my path on a regulas basis.
    What a release…relief…renewal of faith. I now accept a partial healing of memories, and the elusiveness of complete confidence, as the tools that “breathe life into my lungs,” as your say. THANK YOU!!! The entire book was eye opening, as we woman put on such good masks, I didn’t realize that insecurity was epidemic.
    By the way, I too have been into that scantly clad retail store you speak of…and I too detest that it drips with sex. When you came to the story of the sex mints, I laughed so hard I had to put the book down. My youngest daughter, who is mid twenties, went through almost the same adventure with me. Believe it or not, I too asked what makes mints sexy…inquiring as to whether they had candied boobs on them. My only response was a silent stare…which I took as my exit call. Anyway, thanks Beth for this book…for your honesty…for helping set us capitves free.

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