Hey, Sweet things!
It’s Friday afternoon before a holiday weekend and I’ve had a really full but good day. Not that great a week, really, but a mighty good day. God woke me up with a release this morning from something that has been pressing on my heart. I just sort of heard a “Stop it” from God so I decided to stop it. Anyway, I thought I’d end the work week up visiting with you guys a bit before we lock this place up for three days. I will probably say hi before the weekend is over but I’ll have to see how the unplanned festivities go. For now, it is pouring a deluge in South Texas so whatever we’re doing, it is decidedly not out doors. No telling what my two dogs have done to my house while I’ve been at work today. (Star, my Border Collie, has been keeping Geli, Keith’s bird dog, company lately when the really hot weather prevents Keith from taking her with him in his truck. I can’t bring both of them to work without mass pandemonium.)
Before I head to another topic, I want to tell you that you really knocked it out on that last post and I’m so proud of you. Way to tell a girl how she can know God loves her. I watched some real live ministry take place on that last post (and so many others before it). I believe in the ministry that takes place here. I couldn’t have fathomed it in advance but our gracious God has lurked here and so many other places on the web and I am so much the better off for it. You know, you guys are the only reason I’ve never done the Facebook thing. I’ve always wanted to. Are you kidding? What sanguine wouldn’t? But I thought I’d end up getting so distracted by it that I’d lose my vision here. I’m so blessed to be a part of you and, for now, you are one of my biggest serving priorities.
And that’s the reason why I need to stop and say something in protection of this precious, hardworking, sincere and tenderhearted community. We exist to encourage one another to know Jesus Christ as personal Savior and to follow hard after Him. We love big doses of healthy, good, clean fun. We love to laugh. We don’t mind having a good hard cry together. BUT, we can’t consistently be a ton more than that. We can’t replace face-to-face families to many people and certainly don’t exist to take the place of our local churches. Few of us are confused about that. Here’s why I’m bringing all this up. I don’t want you to start getting worn out here or start feeling like there’s such a heavy weight of responsibility that you can’t even bear to log in. I don’t want you feeling guilty or condemned because you couldn’t read every single person’s comment. None of us can. None of us can be anybody’s everything. Let me say that again:
None of us can be anybody’s everything.
To attempt it is to play Christ. To demand it is to expect somebody else play Christ. Minister here freely and freely feel ministered to. Freely give, freely receive, the Scriptures would tell us. But do not let this place become a burden or a form of bondage to you. I just can’t have that. I speak for most of us when I say that what I write here on these posts is to every single one of you, new and old. You do the same when you write general responses. When you or I get a chance to shout something out to someone in a comment, it is never because we found her worthier than anybody else. I don’t have favorites on here. I really don’t as much as we sometimes tease. You don’t either. I also don’t get to read every single comment. Neither does Melissa or Amanda. Neither do most of you. Please know that this community exists to bring you encouragement. Not to add to your insufferably long list of things to do nor, worse yet, to add to a feeling of insignificance. Lord, forbid it. All of you are so loved and welcomed here. I would be heartsick for anybody to get on this blog that was formed to build you up and feel torn down.
By all means, please let your Siestas know when you legitimately need prayer and edification or just a big fat hug. Ask your questions! (I LOVED Erica’s question!) Seek some solid insight! Get together on the side. That’s what this place is for. But I say this to anyone with an intense emotional issue (Believe me, I’ve been there and have sought sound Godly counsel and highly recommend it): please don’t demand more (and more and more) from this sincere community than most women on here can give. Please be careful not take advantage of my girls here in Siestaville. They’ll bend over backwards for you. Don’t put more on them than they can handle or expect of them what they can’t deliver. It is my responsibility to be protective of this community. With all my heart I pray that this will remain one of the very few places in many of our lives where we don’t have to feel guilty and like we’re not enough for people. Please, not here. I say that with love. And if your comments get posted on these entries, you’re probably not who I’m talking about. Let me say frankly that there is a reason why we moderate comments.
Ladies, as you minister on your own blogs and as you participate here, please keep in mind that people can play you. One way you’ll know is if they just keep on and on with it and no answer and no encouragement ever suffices. Sometimes you can just feel it in your gut. That doesn’t mean they don’t need love and prayer and attention. It just means you don’t need to get caught up in a loop. We aren’t meant to take the place of professional counselors.
I love you guys so much. God has placed the stewardship of this community in my hands. I’m the Mama here. And sometimes mamas have to lay some boundaries. This is for your protection.
OK, some of you may not be able to get past that but for those of you who can, this is the real reason why I got on here today. I don’t know why but I’ve been thinking a lot about my grandmother lately. Maybe it’s because I’m a grandmother now and I’ve seen some life come full circle. Whatever the reason, she’s been in my thoughts more than usual recently. My grandmother was widowed when my mom was just fourteen. Four years later, Mom met my Dad and fooled around and eloped with him. When they got back to town, my mother’s mom got revenge I suppose by moving right in with them. She didn’t move out until her mansion was ready in Heaven. I was sixteen years old at the time. Translation? She lived with my siblings and me all our young lives. And, boy, was she a character.
Her name was Minnie Ola Rountree. With a smirk on my face, 30 years ago I suggested to Keith that we name our first daughter after her but he didn’t go for it. Minnie Moore. Don’t you think that would have been darling? Anyway, to us she was “Nanny.” (Not our first child. My maternal grandmother.) She was born before the turn of the 20th Century and lived long enough to ride a horse-driven carriage to town and watch a man walk on the moon. She believed until the day she died that we had a party line (you young Siestas don’t even know what that is. It’s not direct dial to Party City) and would stand over us when we talked on the phone for more than five minutes and say, “Get off that phone! Someone’s probably needin’ an ambu-lance with you on there chewing the fat!”
There were eight of us in all and by the time Dad would let us get two phones in the house (on the same number, of course), Nanny decided if she couldn’t beat us, she’d join us. We’d be on one phone with our boyfriends and she’d be on the other just listening in. You’d walk through the kitchen and there she’d be, sipping on her perked coffee, tuning in like it was her business. Oh, man, she dearly loved gossip. Watched her “stories” on the black and white from noon til 3:00 and only President Kennedy better interrupt her and, even then, it better be good.
She’d been raised in the country and mostly by her big sister. Her second parent was cold in the grave before she was out of grade school. Once a tall, educated man happened through those parts and took a liking to her and married her before she could think better of it. I guess she loved him more than anything in her entire life. His name was Micajah Rountree. They had seven children together. And buried three of them. Under two and a half years-old. Can you even comprehend it? She told me once that every woman she knew with a large family had gone through the terrible agony of at least one loss. They couldn’t have imagined medical care like we have today. In the cemetery where she is buried, she is one of many moms laid to rest near the graves of infants. It’s almost too much to bear to see.
But they had many good times together, too. My grandfather was quite the catch, becoming a mighty fine lawyer and serving in State government. He probably would have been a man of means if not for the Great Depression. Family legends made him bigger than life to me and, even though I never knew him, I set out to be just like him, majoring in political science and minoring in English. God ended up having other plans but not before the man’s legacy had left his mark. I am told he never saw his left palm for a book in his hand. My mom was just like him. I am just like her. Amanda and Melissa are just like me. We live to read. We are so amused that Annabeth can’t put a book down. Rountree blood has trickled down five generations.
My grandmother was a smart woman but her formal education did not quite match her man’s. We moved that woman out of the country but we never moved the country out of that woman. And we are so glad. She used sayings that my siblings and I still employ on a continual basis. When we moved all the way from Arkansas to Houston, Texas (I was 15), her world split wide open. She’d never been to a city you could call a melting pot. She’d say, “Don’t them ferners beat all!” Ferners = someone born in a different country. Of course, what Amanda and I love best about Houston is that it’s such a glad mix of ferners but that’s our taste. Nanny didn’t quite know what to do with such a big world. She never understood that they were just as American as she was.
My favorite thing she ever said – and she said it CONSTANTLY – was this: “Some folks, you just can’t learn ’em nothin’.” (Please use a long “a” sound on the “can’t.” It’s more like “cain’t.”)
I don’t want to be one of them folks that you can’t learn nothin. I want to keep learning as long as I live. Don’t you?
Now that I’ve talked on this long, I might as well tell you what’s kind of had me down this week. For the last several months, we’ve been working on the up-dated version of “A Heart Like His.” (Do not even talk to me about my hair in that video. Believe it or not, I did not do that hair. Another story for another time. Anyway, I happen to really love who fixed that hair so I’m going to keep my mouth shut.) I’ve enjoyed being back in the study of the life of David so much. Scripture doesn’t get any wilder or richer or more applicable than 1st and 2nd Samuel. What’s gotten to me over the last few weeks is not what I said in the original written version (17 years ago!). It’s what I didn’t say. Lord have mercy, I had just come out of one of the worst trials of my entire life. I cannot even express the pain I’d been through or the defeat that had threatened to engulf me. But try as you might, you could not find a single hint of it. (My Nanny would say, “Narry a hint.”)
“Woman,” I said to myself as I was recently reading through the original version and updating it, “Where on earth is your testimony about the grace of God over your pitiful, messed up life? Huh? Huh?” At one point, I read such a down-played version of some misery that I’d been in that I wrote out in the margin, “Rewrite, you big liar!”
It wasn’t really a lie. But it didn’t even begin to measure my true estate. As I’ve read over some of the early writings, I can still see a woman who wasn’t sure she could yet be herself. Thank God, the Scriptures speak loudly and clearly and they’re all we really need. But most of us could use a teacher who owns up to her own struggles and own defeats. Most of us need to know we’re in this together. Way back when I originally wrote “A Heart Like His,” I think I was too close to the fresh graces of God to truly recognize them. I hear a crescendo after that in studies like “To Live is Christ” but, not coincidentally, I don’t hear the full throttle, volume 10 testimony of what God had done for me until “Breaking Free.” There’s an obvious reason for that.
For some reason that missing element broke my heart yesterday. I’d teared up over it several times as I edited “A Heart Like His” but finally yesterday I just got up from my desk, went face down on the floor and bawled my eyes out before God. “I am so, so sorry.”
Praise His Name, He really does grow us up in knowledge and in grace. He is so patient. So merciful. But just in case some of you have only done one of the earliest unrevised Bible studies and didn’t hear it as clearly as you should have, hear me clearly today: GOD IS THE ONLY REASON WHY I CAN HOLD MY HEAD UP LONG ENOUGH TO DRAW A BREATH. ANYTHING IN MY LIFE OF VALUE IS FROM HIM ALONE. HE IS MY DECENCY. HE IS MY ONLY HONOR. WITHOUT HIM, I’M A TOTAL WRECK. I DO NOT DESERVE TO BE IN MINISTRY. I DID NOT EARN IT. ALL THAT I HAVE TO OFFER IS HIM.
He’s it. Plain and simple. Gorgeous and complex.
Some folks, you just cain’t learn ’em nothin.’ And I don’t want to be one of them. Lord, protect me from myself.
“But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be glory both now and forever! Amen.” 2 Peter 3:18
Thank you for giving us permission to be busy and not stop by when it would get in the way of doing “life” sometimes I am not good at giving myself permission on things like this especially when it involves other sisters in Christ. And thank you for your transparency int his post. I have had a really hard week, a week where I got a spanking from God over an issue of pride in my life, and I have felt so defeated because I just havent been able to do “it” right this week. I know that we all struggle at times, but it is refreshing to hear someone who is in a leadership position and such a huge one at that be so honest. Thank you!
Now I have some things I have to go and discuss with my Father that I may have neglected until after reading this.
*btw I love your hair in the updated “Breaking Free” and I mean that sincerely, but remember back when you used to say that if we really enjoy a time when you spoke just to let you know “you’re hair looked really good?” Ha, Ha!!
You’re so darling, Sister. You seem to have such a sweet relationship with God.
Beth,
As I watched you on the edge of my seat, I can so see the annointing on you! I am blessed by each conference and study and wonder where all of us women would be without your teaching. I love you Mama Beth! I am so sorry for the pain you had to endure.
Casey
Thank you so much for your honest humility! I’m right there with you, as tears are flowing down my check sitting in my office at church. After my past…and not just distant past, like within the past year past…I do not one bit deserve to be on staff at a church or minister. BUT God’s lavish grace!
Thanks for being our Momma on here and keeping the standards high, and thanks for being a place where all of us who are broken and bruised can be ourselves and receive God’s love. Siestaville has been a huge blessing in my life this past 9 months. Thanks!
Thanks, Beth, for being so real. I need real in my life right now. My husband left me 9 months ago and the divorce will be final this week. I thought it was real. God has and is healing me…it’s so hard, yet I know God will use this in my life in a way I can’t see….I know I can trust God, but right now it’s hard to trust people…I just can’t tell if they’re real…keep me in your prayers…
Mary Beth, my heart breaks for you girl. Trust God to show you who to trust. He will. I haven’t walked your same road, but I’ve dealt with broken trust — it hurts and it’s hard to overcome….impossible really without Christ.
Mary Beth – I am saying a prayer for you right now, that God will comfort you in his loving arms and that you will really “feel” His all-consuming love for you. I am praying also that He will send you good, godly sisters to lift you up and surround you with prayer and REAL Christian love!! God Bless You!
Mary Beth,
Oh sweet lady, I’m so sorry. My husband walked out on our marriage as well, and it was a hurt like I never could have imagined. If you need to talk, please, please, feel free to email at [email protected].
Hugs and love,
Anna
I’m with you siesta. I would give you a big ole hug and a shoulder to lean on if we were together. Please accept the virtual ones and know that I’m lifting you up in prayer. May you know the peace He gives which transcends all understand.
Mary Beth, I am so sorry you are going through this. It’s one of the hardest things a woman can experience. I have found Rejoice Ministries (rejoiceministries.org) to be a huge encouragement.
Dear Mary Beth,
I have experienced the same thing. My thoughts and prayers go out to you. Know that you are dearly and deeply loved. Isaiah 54:5
Sweet Beth — this post just about killed me, girl. I LOVE women and I love how the Lord has blessed me, the LEAST of these, with such rich friendships from the online world, but you are so right — these relationships CANNOT take the place of my family, my face to face relationships and my church.
I could go on and on, but I won’t & you’re welcome. My heart breaks when I see women living in bondage, and when I see a woman manipulate & use deception I know she’s hurting and in bondage to something. I’ve seen this in my face to face relationships and in my online relationships. As a girl who has walked through some tough relationship stuff, I know how damaging it can be. I love your heart, Beth, and I love that you truly care for this community.
I love you Mary, my post-it lovin’ friend!
Just want to say that I love you, Mama Beth, so very much. I have been blessed beyond measure by God to be where I am and who I am and especially who I am with. My family – immediate and extended, church family and siesta family…and even more. I know without a doubt that I deserve not one bit of it…but today I am learning to graciously accept it all and to make it count for others. God gave you this platform to reach out to so many people because He knew without a doubt that you would love them. And we love you right back! Thank you for sharing and for teaching us – even while you are learning. We know that it comes from God…and we are so grateful to Him.
Beth-
Well, Shuckie darn, sweetie, we siestas love you too.
We really do.
Great post! I had a Nanny (my great grandmother) too and she said some of the same quotes that good Southern women knew as well as they knew the King James Version.
The David study is one of my favorites, regardless your hair! I’m so thankful for every Psalm for it is how we know God fully intends us to pour our nice and honest and angry thoughts before him. I know your do-over will be fantastic and with 2010’s hair instead of 80’s! Love and Happy Independence Day.
I run in the path of Your commands, for You have set my heart free. Ps 119:32
Thanks for that post, Beth. I accepted the challenge to teach our ladies’ Bible study for a few weeks this summer, and the topic God gave me was Holiness. I’ve been studying this for some time, and it seemed like this was the moment God wanted me to share it. The irony is that our whole family appears to be under a massive attack by the enemy, and I’m not thrilled with my own behavior in response. Plus, a habitual sin in my thought life that I thought I’d beaten has reared its ugly head again.
I tried to find another topic, but this one is stuck on me like a burr. So, now I’m caught teaching something that I don’t seem to be practicing very successfully myself. What I am learning is that, as I fall in my own estimation, it becomes that much easier to glorify God as having all the perfection that I do not. I prayed before my first class (two nights ago) that God would communicate all of Himself that He wanted to in spite of me, since the class was never about me to begin with.
“Anyway, to us she was ‘Nanny.’ (Not our first child. My maternal grandmother.)”–That made me laugh out loud!!
“As I’ve read over some of the early writings, I can still see a woman who wasn’t sure she could yet be herself. Thank God, the Scriptures speak loudly and clearly and they’re all we really need.”–And that made me cry. Still am crying. This is so me…a woman who isn’t sure I can yet be myself. Just last night my husband and I were talking about the Lord’s purposes for me…and why I second-guess and doubt Him. I told my husband about the Ruth study, when the barley harvest is just beginning. He said he thinks I’m afraid of the harvest that God is bringing. Like, I’m fighting it, afraid of the blessing. We also talked about how the scriptures I’ve memorized (spirals! :)) has become my very breath lately. Like I can’t get enough and it’s all I can cling to. They do speak loudly and clearly, and they’re all I need.
Well I am not making a bit of sense 🙂 but I’m off to go cry now. Thank you for that line.-You just learned me somethin’! 🙂
Beth,
I have completed most all of your studies. I am in the process of completing the revised version of Breaking Free now. I have completed them all by myself. God used each and everyone of them to speak to me, to minister to me, to bring me closer to Him. You think something is missing from the original study of David and you have limited God. It is evident that only He has directed each and every study and every word in that study. Since He directed the writing of that study, then it was exactly what He needed it to be and He uses it to reach His children and to teach and guide them. You are only doing what He has told you to do at the time. You throw out the seeds, He takes it and makes it grow. He is incredible!!
I have been thinking a lot about David lately. I cannot wait for the new version and for a fresh revelation.
Beth-
Now the rest of the comment…Thank you for your protecting us gals on this blog, and in the other ways you do…and we all know you do. (With the Lords help of course) Personally, I appreciate you telling us over and over we are welcome, wanted and loved here in siestaville, I’m one who needs to hear that more than once..believe me honey.
The other day I asked for the Siestas to pray for me about a very import matter…and someone did. :0) she wrote out her prayer for me, here on the blog. It sooooo touched my heart to know someone cared, took my request to my Lord, and didn’t know me for Adam, made me feel welcomed, wanted and loved… Now that is a Whooa Baaaaby!
moment.
I can’t tell you how much it means to me to read how you are so much like the rest of us. A real woman with real hurts, needs, and cries and laughs just like the rest of us….AND that you tell us the ‘truth’ in such a loving way. You make Bible Study so real and so much fun, you’re a special woman and I thank the Lord for ya.
I love you! I love you for crying out, for being real, for being our protector and loving us like crazy.
Thank you, dear Beth.
I admit, I didn’t understand all of you wrote about–probably over my tired-mama brain, and I hope that I would never contribute to anything but encouragement and joy here in this place.
Not a day goes by that I do not pray for you, your family and ministry.
Chris’ grandmother was Ora Matilda Hawkins (he is the youngest of 6 and his oldest sister is 19 years older)–so your grandmothers would be the about the same generation. We teased about having an Ora Matilda…but decided it was probably better to have Noah, Kylie, Tabor and Sydney :0)
Love to everyone–enjoy a safe holiday!
I love you Holly. You always make me smile.
I have to add that my grandmother was a character, too. She was a Christian and diligently read the Bible, but she also loved her soap operas, and she didn’t succeed in kicking her addiction to chewing tobacco until near the end of her life (she was a country woman also, and from southern Appalachia). She used to keep a can for “spitting” next to her recliner, and my job was to hide it when the church deacons came for their occasional visit to check on her.
My favorite expression of hers was reserved for the gossipy neighbor who used to repeat inappropriate things and then say, “Now don’t tell anybody.” Grandma, who never gossiped, used to reply, “It’s as safe with me as it is with you.” It was a good deal safer, actually. If you gave Grandma a secret, she never let go of it!
Beth,
I love you, and I am so thankful for what JESUS has done in your life. 🙂
Erin
Dearest Beth,
You consistently blow me away with your sincerity & openness. Oh that my walk and testimony [the one i’ve been meaning to get to you for the past 12 yrs… but it keeps developing! ;)] could arrive at such a point.
You are such a blessing and encouragement, and have helped to empower others in the knowledge of Christ, through His Word – at every stage in your ministry.
We admire you & [sometimes not so secretly love you to death] because we are seeing Christ – in you, and always have… since day 1.
The Enemy is good at accusations, as i know you are aware… and sometimes, the enemy is us. I feel silly even saying that, but i just want to express that you are right on. I even want to say not to overthink it, but if the Lord is leading you, then [of course] it is for His Glory.
Hindsight is always 20/20. 🙂
Now it’s time to throw on your Independence Day shades, and have a wonderful Independence weekend celebration!!!! Happy July 4th, and i hope it doesn’t rain too much.
Thank you for encouraging us & blessing us, as always…
Big Hugs & Holy Beijos…
Amaris
Thank you, Beth, for sharing that b/c so many times I feel defeated because I realize anew how little I understood my need for Christ and how little I loved him in the past. Like, because I learn to love him more, I think I never loved him at all! Or, because I’m called to deeper faith, I am afraid I never had faith at all! I sometimes stew over it for weeks at a time, questioning all manner of things when what I ought to do is just what you describe….fall on my face and praise him, thank him, worship him! Oh, the grace he gives! That he desires not only to author our faith but to perfect it as well…I’m so thankful.
MamaBeth, thank you for being real and honest.
I admit and apologize, I’ve definitely been more of a taker than a giver here. I have a pessimistic mindset in general and many times when I comment, I am focused only on you.
I am sorry for being a drain but the good news is that God is working on all that and changing me. I’m better at recognizing when I’m being needy and turning to God instead. And still in counseling.
Sometimes I do rely too much on this blog and fb, partly because of this season I’m in. I live alone, have been unemployed almost 2 years, and only have 1 friend I see on a regular basis. I have a lot of friends at church, but everyone is usually so busy with their own familes. I don’t just go out much because my sweet dog is very old and I can’t leave her alone very long, so I end up with A LOT of alone time. I have been trying to make a better effort at studying and being productive, but I still waste a lot of time online or with tv because I feel lonely.
That said, I should go catch up on my Ruth homework…
We love you here, Michele! So glad you’re part of this community.
Michele,
I definitely understand where you are.
It’s interesting how God sometimes moves us, or moves in us to just be alone, and “still”.
He did that to me, and from what you said, it seems as if He may be doing that to you.
A lot can become a lot clearer in your walk with Him when there is no one else around…
as rough as a time as it can be…believe me,
its worth it!
and as a sidenote: my friendships have been like that for years, but I found that it was because I wasn’t lettin people “in” due to own insecurities.
I remember a letter I wrote my Pastor’s wife telling her there wasn’t anyway for me to connect with people, and she told me, ” I have always tried to get you to get involved, but you have really never tried to plug into anything, so if you feel disconnected then get yourself connected, and dive in 100%”
Your church I am sure has some wonderful people, and if not, there is a this international bible study fellowship online that offers places near you to meet people and study, and fellowship:)
Blessings on that journey friend, and meanwhile,
I think we’ll all be around here too:)
Thank y’all. (Did I use that correctly? I hope “y’all” catches on up here, I love it)
Yes, I know a big chunk of this is my fault because I spent 35+ years aggressively pushing everyone away (result of childhood abuse). Now I am trying to work through the fear and learn how to bond & trust. God has done SO much in me, and I am grateful for all he is providing and doing during this season of healing & rest.
God has removed idols and other distractions to bring me closer to himself, and we’ve worked through big things I never would have had time or mental/emotional energy to address in “normal” busy life.
And it is so easy to love MamaBeth, especially when the maternal role was absent in reality. The little girl inside longs for a beautiful, fun, smart, loving mom like Beth while the 40 year old mind tries to enforce the reality that some unfulfilled childhood needs will never be met and trust that God will somehow fix all that.
I have no idea what is next, but I know the One who does. And I trust that he has plans for hope and a future.
Michele,
Thanks for opening up so much. It sounds like that cost you something and I appreciate the effort. You’re worth knowing and I’m richer for your company here.
Though I fully believe MamaBeth to be a Godsend, may I recommend a book re: mom issues? God had me stumble on this at a crucial time in my relationship with my mom. It’s “The Mom Factor” by Cloud and Townsend (yes, the authors of “Boundaries”). One of their points was that if some parenting didn’t occur in our childhood, we continue to carry those needs into adulthood. We don’t just get over them. Of course God has answers even for those needs, but we have to address them. I found the book profound.
And may I say just for the record: I spend plently of time on here being silly one minute and giving advice the next, but y’all make me want to LOVE God more. Beth has always had this affect on me, but now so do many of you.
Sorry, Michele. That was my own baggage. And not a particularly cute shade of blue. Speaking of blue…those Wolverines should be warming up by now, don’t you think?
Love Y’all 😉
Kathy
Hi Kathy!
Oh, I LOVE Henry Cloud! He has a lot of great stuff on depression and I just finished reading “Changes that Heal.” It was a huge help and I was going to get Boundaries next but have put a hold on spending for now. I am definitely interested in “The Mom Factor” and will get it when I can. Thank you so much!
Yes I sure hope the boys are practicing or at least getting in shape, but I hate to think of football season too early because in Central New York, the start of football usually brings a sharp downturn in temperatures. Sometimes I think about moving south after my dog “falls asleep.” But right now it is crazy hot here – 90’s and sunny all week. I love it, but I have the AC on for her. 😀
Do you want to direct connect sometime – like on fb or email?
Thank you, Michele. I’m honored that you asked. I was actually relieved to hear Beth say she doesn’t do fb right now. I don’t either, though I won’t pretend my motives are anthing spiritual. I’m not particularly jazzed up about learning another mode of communication. “Some folks. You just cain’t learn ’em nothin'”
I would love to share emails, though. My address is: [email protected]
Looking forward to it. Sorry if I replied in the wrong place. It seems there’s a statute of limitations on replies.
Oh, and I’ve found a great way to expand my library w/o blowing my budget. Go to barnesandnoble.com, look up your desired book, then click on used copies. I’ve had used books sent from used book stores all over the country. It seems the stores enter the titles into this system and “poof”, you get your book usually for 1.99 plus 3.95 S&H. In fact I just ordered one this week: I’d read a novel based on Ruth back in high school but figured it was out of print. I looked it up, found it and $5.95 later, it’s on it’s way. Yes, I dream one day of having my own library. I hope Beth won’t mind me sharing all this on here. In fact when she refrences a certain book in Bible study, I’ve learned to look them up and find used copies. I hope this isn’t like pirating music or anything. I like to think of it as my recycling efforts. God Bless
Yes I’m a total book hound for Bible study/theology/spiritual growth books. I only have two bookshelves in my “library” room right now, but I dream of someday having the room lined with bookshelves. But that probably won’t happen because everything is going electronic. I have an awesome electronic Logos Bible study library. I love being able to search quickly and get info within seconds, but at heart I prefer having a hard copy in hand.
Another great resource for inexpensive books is
http://www.abebooks.com
I got the “Writing for the Soul” book by Jerry Jenkins that Beth recommended @ the SSMTC through Abebooks for under $5 including shipping!
Dear Michele,
Honey! I feel like those words could have been my words. We are in different seasons. I’m single, 23, & a new teacher, but I find that between August-May (& who am I kidding? June & July, too!) the only people-relationships I develop are with children between the ages of 4-6. I have wonderful co-teachers, but they have families they stay so busy with day after day. There are many days, I feel as if I’m a drain on some of my co-teachers who need to be spending their time with their families.. not listening to me.
One thing that is helping me with this is plugging myself into an appropriate Sunday School class. This required me leaving my church & joining a new church that has a growing young career group. It gives me an opportunity to learn/study with other believers & there are opportunities to fellowship throughout the week — which gives me a break from Facebook, blogging, & teaching!! 🙂
I don’t know if that can be applicable to you, but please know that I am praying for you! 🙂
hi Michele,
God has laid on my heart to offer up some prayer for you. I’ve been where you are before and it truly is a challenge the lives we lead. Take care today.
Beth-
By the by….your Grandmother sounds like a hoot. Kind of reminds me of mine. My mamaw lived to be 91 lived in a tiny little town in KY. Saw the deaths of 3 of her very adult children, and the deaths of several of her grandchildren at young ages, my only sibling included in that number. She said things like: ‘Narry a one,’and watched soap operas all day everyday. I think she watched the very first sop opera ever on the first day it came on ever.
I miss Mamaw too. she has been gone for 4 yrs almost.
Thank you for sharing your grandmother with us, one day we siestas will see her in heaven, go up to her and say hello and to talk a spell, and she will wonder how in the world did we know her,and we’ll all say…’Beth told us.”
;0)
Hi Beth and everyone else,
I would like to share something MIGHTY that God did yesterday. It is worth a double WOW.
Yesterday was my 10th wedding anniversary. Some may doubt the accuracy of that statement. You see, I have been divorced for 2 1/2 years, not by choice. I am standing for the restoration for my marriage. “Til death do us part” means something to me.
Yesterday, I received an e-mail from Rejoice Marriage Ministries (“God Heals Hurting Marriages”) telling me they were praying for me. Their computer randomly selects people each day to be prayed for. They did not know yesterday was my anniversary. WOW. I wrote back right away to tell the ministry assistant what day it was, and to tell her (I forgot to say please!) to tell the ministry founders (Bob & Charlyne Steinkamp) about God’s amazing timing. That first e-mail was amazing enough, but this morning, there was an e-mail from Bob & Charlyne wishing me a Happy Anniversary.
Wow. Wow. WOWWOW.
What a mighty, personal, touch from God. I felt so loved by Him yesterday. I will continue to wait for God to restore my marriage, and will give Him all the glory when it happens.
That is definitely a God thing. He is the coolest ever.
Wow. I’m standing with you on the vow, siesta. I’m so glad He sent such a sweet way to let you know you are on His mind. :hugs:
Melanie,
I too have been standing for my marriage for over five years. I also have been greatly encouraged by Rejoice Ministries. Their daily devotionals have been a life saver at times. So cool about getting the prayer email ON your anniversary! God has done so many things like that during this time. I know that you don’t know me but I would love to email you. Maybe we can pray together and offer encouragement to each other in this very difficult road we are both on.
I also grew up with my grandma living with us until the day she died at home in 1978. She was three days shy of being 99 years old and I was a senior in high school at the time. Wow, the stories I was blessed to hear of life long ago. My dad is 91 now so I think there is longevity on that side.
Thank you for being used of God to help us see how we may grow in His grace. I can also say anything of value in my life is Him. “For I have been crucified with Christ, therefore I no longer live.” He is my life.
You sweet thing!! This post I will need to read again….Thank you for your willingness to listen and share what the Lord puts on your heart. Thank you for being an example of what opening your heart and sharing your testimony looks like. When we open our hearts and hands to the Lord He blesses us with a teachable spirit…that is my prayer….Lord teach me!
oh I loved this post for so many reasons.
I had to move into the background on this blog and others and my own during this last difficult year. My heart has been sad to miss somethings and then so grieved other times that I couldn’t post (cause words couldn’t express the pain.) I so appreciate the call to remind people to take care of business at home and in the local church. It’s so true. And if I hadn’t, OH HAVE MERCY.
The freedom to come in and out and participate as God would have us do is a beautiful, necessary thing. I pray so much others would also enjoy it.
And goodness gracious, I wanna learn too!! I’m so grateful for the continual example you set before us youngin’s on how to be real, revisit the graces of God, and press on in the knowledge of Him. He really is it. He really is worthy. And I’m just so glad to “do life” with some Siestas who think so too.
Have a wonderful 4th, celebrating the country of Foreigners. We all were at one time or another in our family lines, weren’t we?!
with much love and an overflowing heart,
rachel
:hugs sweetpea:
Beth – you are a blessing to my soul. I love what you just wrote. I am going through the Inheritance video. We just finished the session where you talked about your friend who had cancer. I had stage 4 cancer – even went to MD Anderson. I decided to listen to God about the treatment and He kept telling me “it’s all in your diet”. So I started eating healthy. No meat, dairy, sugar, white flour. Drank lots of veggie juices and filtered water and I am cancer free. Not only I, but my cousin tried it too with her stage 4 cancerous tumors, and her checkup showed the tumors were smaller and some gone, after only 1 month on the diet. I praise God for His good food. The cure is in the food. I have a blog about it if anyone is interested. dianawilkersonbryan.blogspot.com
Thank you for e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g!! You are dearly loved.
As long as I’m breathing, I want to continue to learn and better myself. If I feel I’ve learned it all – then there’s something wayy off in my life!
And I ‘hear you’ and understand what you’re saying about sometimes teaching and not actually owning up to what is currently going on in your life. I think sometimes we think if we’re in ministry we have to have it all together. I try to constantly let others know that I’m flawed and I mess up all the time. I believe in being genuine and real – and God is so good at keeping me humble! I love Him for it.
Thanks for the awesome post. And for making me feel like it’s time to go call my grandma. 🙂
Beth,
I wanted to take just a minute and tell you that my bible study group did A Heart Like His just a few months ago and we LOVED it! It was incredible and God spoke to me in a very profound way through your study on David. Do NOT think for one moment that I didn’t know and sense that even then you were a mighty warrior/princess of God!
I have been so blessed through each and every study and I thank GOD for you and the gifts that HE has entrusted to you!
Blessings and Prayers
Diana
Diana, you have no idea how much I needed that. Thank you. I already felt so much better this morning but that was sweet, sweet icing on the cake. Jesus is so gracious to us all. I am getting on with it.
Great reminder Beth. It’s so easy to lean on human arms rather than on our Father’s strong ones. Even in the local church body, people can depend too much on the pastor and not enough on God. So….can I copy your post and use it in my church newsletter? :b
Beth,
Reading your memories of your grandmother was like reading a novel. Thank you for sharing…your words always come at the perfect time. Enjoy the indoor fun this weekend. Movies, games and making memories. Thank you Mama…you’re one of a kind.
Love,
Amy
I am new to this blog but I want to say thank you for your authenticity and humility Beth. I want to encourage you because your ministry has been such an encouragement to me!!! May God give you all the strength and grace needed to continue to bless others with his love and truth. YOU WILL BE BLESSED!!!!
Beth,
The post about your grandma brought back many memories for me.
I had a “Nanny” in my life but I called her “Mammaw” and she was my great-grandmother. She also watched her “stories” and had unforgettable sayings also. One that I remember is “Well,I’ll be John Brown!” I never found out who John Brown was but Mammaw sure used his name a lot 😉 A lady of wisdom who raised(at the age of 14) her 5 siblings including her 3wk old brother after her mom died of an infection from giving birth. Oh how I miss her!
Have a wonderful 4th Siestas!
Stacie
Like the John Brown from the raid on Harper’s Ferry? “John Brown’s body lies a mouldrin’ in the grave”? Try googling it, though it is possible that your Mammaw knew another John Brown. I’ve never heard that expression before!
My mom used to say “Well, I’ll be John Brown!” too!!! I’vd never heard anyone else say that. How neat is that! My mom went home to Jesus five years ago, July 9. This simple phrase was a sweet reminder of Mom. Thanks for sharing. God bless.
I just want to say that I still love those early versions of your studies. My heart is touched to its core by a woman used of God, who is so gentle and powerfully controlled by His Spirit, and yet so in awe of who He is in her life. It gives me “chill-bumps” sometimes. Its ok that you did not “bare it all” back in those versions, because no one could get focused on who Beth Moore was, but just drink in who Jesus was in Beth Moore.
And I’m not saying it isn’t obvious now, but that it WAS obvious back then as well.
Isn’t it wonderful to look back and see how far He has brought all of us on our walks of faith. You, dear one, are just more bold than the majority of us, to proclaim it to all who are willing to listen.
Bless you!
Thank you for that, Vera. And believe me when I say, I will never completely bare it all and for all of your sakes! I’m so blessed to serve you.
Hi Beth,
I have never commented before but I just had to let you know of all the Bible studies I have done of yours, A Heart Like His is my very favorite. The Lord got a hold of my heart through that Bible study and I got a hold of His and have never let go. I think it was divinely perfect. I have worn out the VHS tapes watching them over and over. (I do have to admit that I do sometimes crack up over your hair, but that was the style back then)
Thank you for being a servant of the Almighty!
Tanya
You’re singing my song sweet Beth. I am nothing without Him. Broken, sinful and confused. But with Him I am made complete. May I live daily to glorify His name, that is my soul’s desire.
Beth,
Wow! That was a powerful post! When you said you felt protective of the women on here, I thought of Boaz and Jesus’ examples in the Ruth study. It’s just like God to put into our daily lives something we’re studying in His Word. I can’t wait until Tuesday! I am still doing it solo, but I am hoping I have a partner soon! If not, I’m okay with going it alone with God.
I’m sure you are sick of hearing it, but I also love your honesty in these posts. I try to be transparent in my life as well. As a waitress, I find that people are more understanding when you own up to your mistakes or let them know what’s going on.(I don’t mean to imply that I make a lot of mistakes, just enough to give me a good dose of humility each week!) Reading the comments from the last post, it seems like many of us have had a rough week. Some of my friends have been to 2 funerals with one more coming in about a week’s time. Hope to hear from you again sometime this weekend, but if not, have a great 4th of July weekend! We are going to a reunion at my in-laws. It will be HUGE! Grandma is in her late 90’s and had 12 children! Have a wonderful weekend, Siestas! Joan
Thank you, Beth. I appreciated when you wrote, “please keep in mind that people can play you. One way you’ll know is if they just keep on and on with it and no answer and no encouragement ever suffices.” A good litmus test for relationships.
Loved the name Minnie Ola! Is that great or what? It’s so “Southern”. My grandma’s name was Ida Mae. Some of those old names are making a comeback. Our friends have 4 daughters and 2 of them are old fashioned: Hettie and Hazel.
I remember party lines. We didn’t have one, but I remember many times when my mother was gone, we kids would get on the phone to call our friends. Invariably, the operator would come on the phone and say our mother was calling with an emergency. We always knew that meant we were in big trouble for tying up the phone line while she was trying to call us. There was never an emergency, thankfully.
“Rather, let our lives lovingly express truth [in all things, speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly]. Enfolded in love, let us grow up in every way and in all things into Him Who is the Head, [even] Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One).” Ephesians 4: 15 Amplified
Dearest Beth, Thank you for this post. I felt a burden lifted reading it. I dearly love this blog and am so grateful to be part of it in a small way. And I am a big fan of boundaries 🙂 I love loving Christ with my siestas and our Siesta Mama!!
Blessings in rich abundance – Sister Lynn
You know I dearly love you, Sister Lynn! So glad you are here!
I love love love that you are so real and honest! Thank you for that. I must say something about facebook, I had one and Beth you are absolutely right about it being a distraction. I feel that it could have pulled me so far away from God, how terrible. When my son said Mommy you are always on facebook, I said good riddens! Let stick to the things of God and bless his name! Thanks Beth!
Man is it ever flooding here in South Texas! We are all getting a little cabin fever with all this massive water falling from the sky! Us girls had to go and rescue our crazy border collie (Maggie) from one of the neighbors. She FREAKS when it thunders and we had let her out in the yard…bad mistake! I’m not sure our neighbor appreciated rescuing her (Maggie – all nervous and muddy).
On another note and back on topic…Thanks so much Momma Beth for being honest and reminding us what the blog is for. So many wise words that we can all learn from. Thank you Jesus for those mighty words.
And by the way, I can truly relate to your Nanny! We had a Nanny too. we were just talking about how much we missed her. She grew up in Elgin, TX out in the country…dirt roads, etc. Had her babies at the house. She always told me…”Youngin’ I’ll never understand why you girls have babies without some type of pain reliever. I would have used it in a minute. Would you have your tooth pulled out without medicine??” LOL! We were just talking about how much we missed her. Must be goin’ ’round!
Enjoy your 4th weekend…hopefully we all get to see some fireworks, if this rain stops.
What powerful words. I feel like I need to read and re-read this over and over again. Thank you for a powerful post!
Mama, NO WORRIES! I don’t know if this is encouraging or not, but I promise I had never met a SINGLE person who read their Bible and someone drug me to Beloved and you told of your junk. Today I too hold my head high under His hand because you made me believe I could. I always say I am so thankful my Bible teacher told me to believe I was who God said I was and to never settle for religion! You showed us Mama, I was 23 then, now 30, it has been an awesome ride and I can’t WAIT to do David! He receives all the honor and glory, always!
Kelly
Dear Mama Beth,
Thank you for this space. You have opened my heart with your teaching and the siestas have all been great.I was VERY hesitant to start writing here. I am new to blogging, so if any rules were broken I apologize.
I sure am learning alot here. Have a great weekend. Take care. Rebecca
You are a blessing here, Rebecca! No rules broken!
I am not sure I have ever left a comment before, but I read this blog regularly, and I have to be honest, when I first saw this long post I thought: Okaaay. Soon I couldn’t take my eyes off of it though, that was great! I am from the country, and we still talk like your grandmother did so I know what you mean. And I loved the advice. Thanks.
Beth,
I love this post so much. I have visited Siestaville less frequently because the Lord has had me preoccupied with other things.
I have been facilitating a group for women called Betrayed Hearts by Ted and Diane Roberts. Isn’t it true some of these very difficult times (as you referred to in relating to the life of David) are the very things Satan intends to use the do us in. BUT, if we hang on long enough…. There are roots that go deep and God gets to display His splendor. Especially when we are honest!
We know the depths He has rescued us from. The hope in Christ is what moves us to minister in Siestaville or otherwise, but for those of us who are maturing…. It is a tricky walk. It took me a long time to move out of the one who would love to find Jesus vicariously through others with passion for Him to one who JUST WANTED HIM. I can relate having no boundaries, I have been one. God wants to lead all of us to His cup. He alone we will quench all our thirsts. I pray for those who are seeking freedom in Siestaville, you won’t find it here… But I tell you what! These siestas can point you in the right direction! Jesus wants to give us the easy yoke. He is knocking at our doors, but He will NEVER force Himself. I pray we all find Him in deeper capacities through our circumstances and revelation through His Word.
Have a wonderful holiday! Moreover, have a wonderful time taking a drink, like Esther have your fill!
Jina
Jina,
Really liked your point about freedom not being forced on us. Needed to be reminded of that!!! So thank you.
Well said Beth… I am encouraged when I BRIEFLY read the blog posts.
Oh Beth. Wow. Thanks for sharing – about blog life, your Nanny, funny quips only Southerners know how to pronounce, and your fresh eyes falling on your old writings. That’s what I love about you and LPM and Siestaville: It’s okay to have really bad days. It’s okay to have really great days. But at least let’s try and keep it honest. David kept it really honest in his life; although he, too, could have used a few “rewrites” (like most of us!)
You really do have a heart like his – and like His.
Love you! Eat a lot of potato salad! Marvel at the fireworks! Have a happy 4th, all!
I am glad you’re the Mama here, because I really look up to you. These past several months I have been challenged and stretched so much by your ministry – not to mention all the good laughs. Seriously, your sense of humour kills me every.single.time. I love it. ♥
Thank you Beth for sharing this. It speaks to me more than I can convey. Thank you for being a vessel God can use.
SO loved hearing some of Nanny’s story!!! Do you remember the picture you posted on your website some years ago (pre blog days) of Nanny and you 5 children? I printed it and still have it in my ancient file of old LPM newsletters. It’s a precious picture – bet the siestas would love it if you posted it on the blog.
I LOVE when you talk about Nanny. I too had a grandmother who was far from a perfect person but couldn’t possibly have been dearer to me. I think she’s a HUGE part of why I love being a grandmother so much. And I have a feeling there’s lots of Nanny’s influence in your grandmother heart too. Priceless part of our heritage isn’t it? I don’t know why God blesses us in these sweet ways – but I’m so thankful he does!
Happy 4th of July from a Siesta old enough to remember party lines and a voracious reader as well. I was fortunate enough to be able to ask you a question during the Q&A session in Houston during the SSMT celebration and it had to do with the “suicidal ideations” that someone posted on the blog. Thank you again for reiterating the fact that we need to use discernment on here. I love you so much Beth and am so thankful for Siestaville. Just watched the DVD from session 3 of A woman’s heart… prepared hearts and all day I have found myself saying to God “Show me Your Presence…Your Presence is all I need.” LOVE this study Beth.
PS That comment that you don’t have favorites was surely not meant for me was it !! HaHa
Linda