So Long Insecurity Week Eight!

Hey, Sweet Things! I’m so happy to meet you over here on our new site! We really feel like we’ll be able to serve you more efficiently here on WordPress and appreciate you going to the extra trouble the transition takes. In no time at all, this will feel like home again to the community we call Siestaville: a spicy little respite in a chaotic world. We’ll have the benefit of more technical support and far fewer quirks (besides the 1300+ X 10 on last week’s post. A keeper forever. And don’t think I won’t tell on you. Speaking material for years to come).

I am writing your Thursday post from my back porch on this gorgeous Wednesday late afternoon.  Houston has a reputation for a lot of things (good and bad) but few people accuse her of beauty. She gives it her best shot in the Spring, however. The azaleas are in full bloom and so are all my early roses. The lawn has turned green. The trees are budding. Staring across my small back yard I can count at least fourteen distinctive living colors. The temperature is perfect. The wind is blowing. I hear at least four different kinds of birds singing. Some of them are fussing because I’m out here and the feeders haven’t been filled since yesterday. They think this is IHOP.

Keith’s out and about. Star is dropping a yellow tennis ball at my feet and wearing a plaid bandana the color of Easter eggs. Curtis, Amanda, and the kids are on their way to Wednesday evening church where they’ll eat supper with friends there in our Fellowship Hall (do all churches have those?), then CJ will teach his class. Amanda will be his best student and biggest fan and Jackson and AB will go to their classes. Melissa is in Atlanta fighting with the clock on the countdown till the final form of her Thesis is due. By the time you’re reading this, it will be turned in. She will be exhausted but relieved. Colin will no doubt be ecstatic. God knew exactly what kind of man that young woman was going to need.

I have had my first real day off in several weeks. Hmmmmm. Maybe even three or more. That’s not the way we like to do it around here but it was largely unavoidable. The book tour (first time I’ve ever done one) pitched into the middle of the regular speaking/teaching calendar threw my schedule over the edge. I have said to the Lord several times, “If You’ll just get me till next Wednesday…” And He did. The tour is complete and I am getting to take a glorious deep breath. I did meet my LPM staff at Sweet Tomatoes on this day off, however, because, after all, they’re my best buddies. I’m so blessed to also like so many of the people I love. We’re all in town this weekend, of course, for Easter. I wouldn’t be away for anything. It would never be the same away from my home church of 25 years where I will worship with people precious to me, both family and friends, both young and not so young. Then my extended family will meet up at our house for a big roast, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and an as-of-yet undetermined dessert. About the time we’re too full to bend over, we’ll bend over anyway and hide Easter eggs.

I dearly love this time of year.

OK, young ladies, we have a book to bring to finish so I better stop musing over Spring and start thinking So Long Insecurity. We’ve got only two more weeks to go in our discussions and five chapters left to read. That means we’re going to need to take three chapters this week so we can close up next week with only two. That works, though. It’s not hard reading and many of you have already finished the book anyway and are reviewing it for the sake of discussion. However it works for you is great with me!  Your homework this week will include Chapters 14, 15, and 16 and the following three questions –  one per chapter. Try to be as succinct as possible in each answer so we can read through many of the comments.

1) As you surely noticed, Chapter 14 is more of a testimony than a teaching but it concludes with a charge to deal with our female insecurities for the sake of young girls coming up behind us.  Annabeth was my big inspiration for the journey. Briefly describe someone who is worth doing what it takes to you to live abundantly and effectively in Christ. Help us picture her so that she inspires us, too. Needless to say, don’t share more than she’d want you to.

2) I wish we could discuss all of Chapter 15 in person but this is the next best thing. Name a couple of ways pertinent to your sphere of life and influence that you could look out for your own gender in our battle with insecurities. In other words, how can you (not others but you in particular) start becoming part of the solution in your female relationships rather than default into part of the problem. No condemnation here. Goodness knows, we’ve all been both. Our challenge is to learn to be deliberate. How are you prepared to do that?

3) I can’t wait to see your answers to this one. Based on Chapter 16 and the challenge to look past ourselves, what is your passion? If you don’t have one presently, don’t feel pressured or unnerved. You might be too deep in toddlers or school work to think past the urgent. Those things are priority and need to be your passion right now. If, however, you long for something that makes you feel fully alive and part of something specific God is doing for the greater good, ask Him to nurture that vision in you. It will be ultimately be the key to life on the outskirts of self-absorption. Keep in mind, your passion may not be anything you’re currently engaged in. Maybe you don’t have the opportunity to participate right now. Maybe it’s just in dream-form. Or maybe it’s just a place God has tendered your heart. Try to give it a name. What is something outside of yourself that you feel passionate about?

I will look so forward to your answers, Sisters! I’m so honored to have you along on this journey. Try to enjoy it while you’re at it. Believe it or not, as much as it’s pried into our business, we might just miss it when it’s over.

May the Lord answer you when you are in trouble. May the God of Jacob make you secure! (Ps. 20:1 NET)

With much affection,




491 Responses to “So Long Insecurity Week Eight!”

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  1. 351
    Yolanda says:

    1. I’m not a Mother, so your words in the book, took deep hold of my heart because I’m always blessed and say that I am and feel that I am…to MOTHER OTHERS. Sphere of influence: I mentor a young girl in our school system. I mentor a young mother and wife and have done so for over two years now, one on one, each week. I am not a blood mother, but I am blessed to be a grandmother of one lovely woman-child and two man-child’s. 🙂

    2. Mentoring, it takes time and it is truly an investment for the kingdom of God. To share experiences that worked and didn’t work. I also write for God and He is beginning to use me to teach.

    3. My Passion….is to help hurting women that have walked into the path I had walked to be set free from guilt and condemnation; that God knew that they would walk that path, and STILL, YET…chose to allow His Son, Jesus Christ, to die on the cross for their sins and my sins. What a humbling thought and a thought that makes my feet dance and my mouth shout…GLORY GLORY GLORY!!!

  2. 352
    Sherri says:

    1) Right now, my inspiration is a group of young ladies that I have watched grow up before my eyes, some former students, some former youth from our church. These young ladies feel comfortable to still share their lives with me, in fact most feel comfortable to have me as their friends on facebook as well 🙂 As I read their posts or listen to their lives, I see that same insecurity, as which I struggle. It seems so much more unfair to see them struggle with it and my heart breaks when I hear it or read it as case may be. I seem to know what to say to them; now I want to be better model for them also.
    2)What can I do? Stop making comparisons, that is my biggest mistake. I am always thinking someone else has it better. How come they get what I want? As math teacher, I should know better than 2 + 2 = 5!! Also, I never thought I could possibly trip someone else’s insecurity. I am not like that, especially since I am so into comparing and always finishing last. But in this age of internet, I found my name plastered on a national “news” website asking if people in my hometown knew who I was because I was trying to steal this woman’s man away. I have guy friends I talk to and they all told me the same, it wasn’t them; so I still have no clue who posted this comment. After several of my friends flagged the post and commented this woman was wrong, the post was deleted. I had no clue I had made this person insecure!! I don’t even know who it is!!
    3) Passion. My life has been my son and my career, my students. But I would like to do more things for myself. I do enjoy scrapbooking, preserving the past and travel. I am going to Alaska this summer and would love to spend more time with my scrapbooks. I know my purpose in life should be so much more; but somehow I keep hearing how God really wants me to enjoy life and these things give me real joy. Of course along with my Bible studies, looking forward to seeing this program conclude with the telecast and seeing Beth live in St. Louis this summer!!

  3. 353
    Nichole says:

    1. As a mom of two boys I have to say that I really want to be more secure for my future daughters-in-law. Right now my boys are young (10 and 12) and think girls are really annoying, but I realize that window is closing quickly. I think about the “issues” that I’ve dealt with over the years with my own mother-in-law and those that my sisters and girlfriends have encountered, and honestly, it’s terrifying. I want to be more secure in who I am and what I have to offer so that when that day comes, I can be cool and not a total nightmare…for me and for my sons.

    2. This one was a little harder because I really don’t see myself as much of a threat. Ever. I think finding common ground with other women is extremely important. At the end of the day, we’re more alike than we are different.

    3. Great question! The line in this chapter that said “If you’re willing, you can probably trace your passion all the way to the deepest point of your pain.” really got me thinking (again) about a time in my life during the 6th grade when I was severely bullied at school. I remember coming home from school nearly every single day and going straight to my room where I would cry and beg my mom not to make me go back. Every day. The main way that I coped was to take out my frustration and anger on the piano. I spent many many hours pounding out songs. Amy Grant was my hero then and I still consider myself one of her biggest fans many years later. She recently released a new cd with a re-recording of Arms of Love (which just happened to come out the week that I read this chapter). That was one of the songs I played over and over during that year. I sang it at church. Not until hearing it again after nearly 30 years did I realize what those words really meant to me in light of the healing that has taken place. I love to sing and have written a few songs myself. That’s my passion. To see a song used to encourage someone else…doesn’t matter who’s singing it. That is what makes me come alive.

  4. 354
    Dianne Walters says:

    1. My granddaughter and namesake, Nancy Dianne, is so worth it. I realize that I have great influence with her. We’ve been singing praise songs together since she first started to sing, she loves to make smoothies with me, we pick veggies and herbs from my garden together, and she loves to have “Fancy Nancy” dinners and tea parties at my house. Her mom tells me that she does things for and with me that she is not even interested in at home. When her baby brother was born, lots of family was gathered in the waiting room at the hospital when his arrival was announced. When all the excitement died down and family members dispersed to make phone calls, Nancy and I were alone and she said, “Grammy, we forgot to praise the Lord!” So we stopped right then and praised the Lord together. WOW! What a moment. Since I know that I have great influence in her life, I want to make a definitive decision to be a strong woman setting a good example of what a secure woman in Christ looks like. I’m willing to do what it takes to be cured. She is absolutely worth it! My grandson and my husband’s namesake, Andrew Scott, is also so worth it. I loved the comment from another woman who hopes her sons see that she is a woman secure in the Lord and that they will seek a wife who will be secure in the Lord. Ditto!
    2. I know that I need to stop making comparisons and just enjoy and protect the friendships God has blessed me with. I want to get to the point where I can admire the gifts and great qualities in my friends without thinking negatively of myself. No more bad math!!!
    3. My brother and his wife are missionaries in Cameroon, West Africa, and we contribute a small amount each month to financially support their work. Should finances permit, my husband and I would love to be able to make a visit there and experience first hand the work that they do among the Baka people – to actually meet the people and minister personally to them.

    Dianne – Hartselle, AL

  5. 355
    Chesney says:

    again, the insecure part of me wants to be disappointed in myself for not answering all of these posts perfectly or on time, but I’ll say no, and choose to be secure!
    1. I am so excited to be a mom someday so the thought of being secure for her to also be secure is inspiring.
    2. I definately need to stop making comparisons. If i feel like someone is better than me I try to balance the “math equation” by listing their flaws and my good things in my head…and I drive myself crazy over them…(ex: well that celebrity is way more beautiful than me BUT they are not walking with Jesus and they get people to do their makeup and hair for them) That leads to how I need to stop de-personalizing others to make myself feel better. I want to be an example of a secure woman to the women around me because I want them to be drawn to me and so I can share the extravagant love of Jesus with them!
    3. I am super passionate about life. I am SO passionate about loving Jesus and loving people. (When I was little I would write and say this phrase ALL THE TIME: “I love everyone and everything in the whole entire universe!) I am also passionate about WORSHIP DANCE. And I am passionate about sharing Jesus’ passionate love with other women because He has so loved me. AND I am passionate about being a wife and a mommy someday!!!!! : )

    Love you all!


  6. 356
    Joan says:

    Question 3. After walking through the last weeks of one of my best friend’s life as she went to be with the Lord after an 8 year battle with breast cancer, her husband told me – I have noitced that you are one who runs to the darkness – why is that? My passion is running to the darkness because I know – I mean I REALLY know – His light is greater – His love is stronger and the darkness is just a place to watch Him shine!!! and you know what?? He ALWAYS DOES!! Not in the same way each time – but He really does shine and bless the most as we walk through tough things trusing Him. I love love to see Him work and encourage those in tough times to look for the table in the midst. Psalm 23 – “Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death – I will fear no evil for you are with me – you prepare a table before me in the midst of my enemies” (the darkness). That table is full of gifts for us as we trust in Him. Each gift picked out personally for us and worth every far more than what the darkness has brought. Most of us just want out and forget to look at the table. We are so focused on our pain we don’t look. But, the table is always there – and it is awesome because He is!!! ok – can you tell I am passionate about this?? haha – I have never failed to see His light shine in any darkness!! He has blown me away every time with the gifts He has for all at His table!!!

  7. 357
    Cindy says:

    Chapter 14: My little “Peanut” as we call her (aka Natalie). Is just turning 3 this Saturday. She is 3 going on 16. My mom says that it’s “payback” for what I was like. SHe is full of energy 100% of the time. She doesn’t like naps like her brother did b/c she’s just afraid she’ll miss something. She is as precious as can be though. I’ve been sick the last couple of days and last night she came in with a taco shell(plain) that their Daddy had made them for dinner. She then brought me a glass of water in one of her watering can bath toys. I won’t lie and say I’m not exhausted, because I am, but these formidable years are just so precious and I SOOO want to do the right things. I want Natalie to love her LORD, her body and her personality and WHO God made her. She knows almost all the words to the Christian music we play in the car and hearing that sweet little voice, just makes this Momma’s heart melt!

    Chapter 15: I’m relatively thin so I think being cautious of what I wear around my friends who might be a tad bigger is important. And like you said, don’t be wearing a low-cut, super-tight outfit around their husbands. I haven’t done this in 10 years but it used to be me in Graduate school.

    Chapter 16: My passion is Women’s Bible Study!!! I love being involved in church bible study and have taught a bible study out of my home last summer. I plan to start one here in England in a month or so. –Please pray for discernment on the topic, and for the hearts of those ladies that hear about it and those that decide to come. 🙂 Women’s bible studies are not the norm here in England and lots of people have said, “your doing what?”…they just aren’t familiar with them. I’m thinking about doing “Jesus – the One and Only”! Oh, that the LORD would quicken my decision!

  8. 358
    Joybird says:

    1)I haven’t yet met the young girl who inspires me the most to do this study. I don’t yet have children, but I do believe that God will, in His time, give me a daughter and I want to walk in Christ’s security for her. And if/when she struggles with insecurity, I want to be able to share tried and tested tools for freedom.

    2)I am already trying to deliberately bring my mind under Christ’s control when it comes to comparing myself to other women. I am constantly evaluating the women around me, primarily based on weight. If someone is slender, I covet her body and want to look like that myself (meanwhile I’m beating myself up.) If she is heavier than me I feel relieved that I am not the fattest girl in the room. I am sick of this. It has to stop now, in Jesus’ name.

    3) I really don’t know what my passion is right now. Seeing others healed is a part of it. My friend’s brothel ministry breaks me down every time I read her blog. And the idea of being a mom, raising children to be whole, holy and wholly dependant on Jesus moves me deeply. But in this season I’m really letting God restore me and prepare me for whatever He wants for me.

    single, 30’s

  9. 359
    jenny hud says:

    white hall,ar
    29 for like 3 more months!

    1. mikayla – my sweet, super-sensitive girly girl. she will be 5 in june and is so girly it hurts this tom-boyish athlete. she is intelligent, has an impeccable memory, and knows more scripture than any 5 year old i’ve ever seen. her middle name is joy and rightly so – she is quick to laugh and generous with her smile. she cries when she is in trouble – not to manipulate, but she honestly can’t stand that she has disappointed or hurt someone in any way. she is 4 and she gets it: she understands that God loves her so completely and it truly hurts her when she hurts God’s feelings. she has caused me to be sensitive, emotional, touchy-feely, and she makes me run towards Christ because i know she is watching my every move!
    morgan – my little CEO. She will be 2 in may and couldn’t be any different than her sister if she tried. she is very very very, oh my, very strong willed. she loves completely. she is quite opinionated and once we understand everything she is saying it is going to be quite an interesting ride. she knows exactly what she wants and no one can make her do what she doesn’t want to do, and her backside can attest to that. she is learning all about Jesus and tries to out-sing you especially if the song is about Jesus. she is not quick to laugh or smile like her sister, but oh, when she does – it is completely genuine and lights up the room. she is amazing! she has caused me to be patient, confident, aware of my own scowly bad mood, compassionate, and fair.
    they are beyond worth it.

    2. to not compare. i’m not sure why we do this, but i believe we have just done it for so many years that we subconsciously do it all the time. i want to be deliberate in my thoughts, so that these useless, comparitive thoughts will have no room. i was totally floored with the revelation in psalm 84:1 – of course, i am His dwelling place. not the temple anymore, it’s me. i. am. lovely. i have this amazing treasure – why do i look where moths and rust destroy?

    3. i am quite deep in raising these sweet baby girls and working full time, but i definitely still have passions and ones that i get to be actively involved in!! one is leading people in worship. oh what an amazing privilege to show folks how to engage, and how to get right to the throne room by getting outside of themselves and being wholly consumed by the Lover of their souls. showing them that worship is not just singing songs. another passion that i get to be involved in at the moment is working with youth. i lead a small group of junior high girls and i get to help with the youth praise team. teenagers are tough, but still moldable. my biggest desire for them: that they will not have a prodigal testimony. “i got saved when i was 12 and then when i graduated highschool i…. then in my twenties i came back.” NO – not necessary!

  10. 360
    Kristi says:

    I’m a bit behind in the homework….

    1) My inspiration? My baby sister. She’s 39, recently separated, has 2 “loose cannons” (sons), and her life is such a mess. After reading this book, I can see insecurity all over her. Makes me sad. I’m sure I’ve been exactly where she is now. Thank you, God, for healing and wholeness!

    2) What can I do now? I have actually just recently started an online support group for “Mothers of Young Adults.” “MOYA” There are just 6 of us right now. (We started out with 4.) We are just frustrated, crazy, and sometimes frantic mothers whose young adults aren’t always living like they grew up under our noses! We pray for each other, support each other, we have someone to talk to, and we email each other encouraging words and Bible verses. It’s really lovely. (We are careful not to tear down our children in our effort to build each other up.)

    3) My passion? Oh!! Secretly, I want to grow up and be just like Beth Moore!! No, honestly. I would find it such a priviledge to do what Beth does. My heart’s desire is to help hurting women see that they are truly a treasure and they are loved. This was such a struggle for me. And as Jesus heals my heart and grows my roots down deeper, I am able to see so much hurt and despair amongst our church-going sisters! It’s a crime!! Every Sunday, I long to reach out… I can see the pain on their faces!! Oh, Jesus! Bring healing to these broken hearts!! This is my true passion!

    It was so inspiring to read all these comments and answers to the questions. You all are inspirations!!


  11. 361
    miranda says:

    Colorado Springs, CO

    1. Well, at this moment that would be my one and only daughter Kadence Joy. She is a barley 5 year old bubbly, brown haired beauty with the prettiest blue eyes and long eyelashes ever! My hubby is a pastor who loves to drum so that is how she got the name Kadence. And Joy, well, that is where she is my namesake. She and I have the same middle name and share it proudly. She is the oldest of 3 and has 2 younger brothers. She is by far the best BIG sister I could have ever asked for. She has a wonderful imagination and a kind and loving spirit. She makes me want to be a better mommy and I love her so dearly.

    2.I can stop comparing and start showing compliments around me. I can believe that I am lovely and hopefully start to help other woman feel the same by my example.

    3. My passion is to guide young girls (high school age) or young woman (20’s) like me. To help this journey of life to make a little more since. To learn together and try to act on what we learn. I also have a heart to open our home to anyone who needs. And to have the hospitality that I have always wanted.

  12. 362
    Tina says:

    #1…..My inspiration for abundant living are the 2 beautiful daughters the Lord has entrusted to me. Emily 19 and Amanda 26. They are joys of my life.

    #2…..How to be an influence…I know it is that I need to speak up more. I worry that what I say won’t come out right. And more often than not I sit by quietly. I am doing much better at this than I used to. I think so often all that is needed is just someone to begin the conversation and then others feel it is easier to come along too.

    #3…..What is my passion/hearts desire… and the widow and the orphan. My heart’s burns to see the restoration of family, the restoration of innocence to children…and for people’s hearts to be tender toward each other. My heart just breaks for the brokenness of “family” and all the devastation that leaves behind. Mercy my passion is mercy.

    And WOW I have to say… Isaiah 58:6-11 I was some how not surprised to find that at the end of chapter of Chapter 16!!! How I love that verse!


  13. 363
    Tammie 50 married says:

    1) Grace Elizabeth, my beautiful 3 1/2 year old granddaughter. I didn’t know the Lord until her mother was 13, so there are things I wish I could do over. I can do this for Grace since I didn’t for Lindsay.

    2) I choose not to compare myself to other women, starting with Grace’s other grandmother. I could give you an example, but I’m choosing not to compare:) I am also going to be very careful about pushing other women’s buttons.

    3) Since accepting Jesus at 40 years old, (thirteen years ago) God has given me more than one passion that I could follow for Him. However, because of my lack of confidence and raging insecurity, I have not followed any of them through. Needless to say, I certainly feel a failure in that department. In fact, I live on a ranch in the middle of nowhere and felt convicted over that one:). Fortunately our God is one of continued forgiveness and has put a new passion in my lap. It doesn’t require another degree like the last one did, just getting my dog therapy certified so we can go to hospice or nursing homes and visit the elderly. Some day I want to go to another country and hold and rock orphans in my lap.

  14. 364
    Michelle Pitonyak says:

    1. My sweet 13 month old daughter is more than worth every effort I can muster to abolish chronic insecurity. She is small for her age and a lot of people refer to as a little “peanut”. But, that little peanut is strong and smart for her age. She loves affection, gives hugs and kisses, and looks deep into your eyes when being cuddled and nursed. When learning something new she constantly has the analytical “thinking look” and you can tell she is trying to take the entire world in. She already seems perceptive and with that said I don’t want her to have anything negative within mom to perceive that mom can actually work to change!

    2. I can start loving the women around me unconditionally vs. conditionally. I can overlook their problems, versus putting up a wall and a grudge in my heart, and the offenses I have perceived. I can give sincere compliments and words of blessing each encounter.

    3. The “passion” question is difficult for me to answer. I feel like my world has be knocked around and things that I used to enjoy or think I was created for don’t seem to do it for me now. I have left work to be a wife and mom, which is my current passion. I am so blessed to be able to raise my daughter every second of every day! The current theme of my life is that God has been laying it on my heart to homeschool my children. I am so excited to learn more about homeschooling and feel passionate about being the ultimate teacher to my children. My daughter is only one now, so I have time to learn and get my mind around this 13+ year adventure, depending on how many children we are blessed with.

    30’s, MI
    Married with a one year old

  15. 365
    Holly says:

    This weeks response has taken alot of thought out of me, as i really have struggled with question #3…
    1. Being unmarried and Single, this was somewhat of a challenge after my move to SC, til God placed upon my heart my darling friend I mentor that is now in college. This young woman btw her junior and senior years desired more from her relationship with Christ, and found it… only at the cost of being the object of ridicule among her “friends”. She “escaped” to my training room and we would study the Word or discuss something she had read. She is a remarkable young woman, who has decided to live out her life for Christ on her campus, and is also reaching out to yet another student to bring into our small studies that take place in the summer on break. (yeah we totally LOVE Siesta Mama’s stuff 🙂 as i have done them all, and she is catchin up 🙂 – but this summer i think we are going to do Ruth by Kelly Minter) She is a delight and deserves a mentor that is secure to show her how to continue in this walk on the sod of earth.

    2. One of my biggest challenges during this book has been to really evaluate those i have let speak into my life. I am truly not helping a cause for Christ if i am seriously entangled in a web of gossip and back biting…. I had a Godly mentor tell me years ago, the thing you see in others that you dislike the most or get under your skin, is usually b/c you, yourself are doing those. I have backed off from the “b” group, and have found this freeing to encourage and speak into others lives. I want to be the encourager not discourager…
    I LOVED the story about the Jars of Clay!!!! One of my memory verses last year was 2 Cor 4:6….. I just forgot about v. 7 😉 I have THIS treasure!!!! Praise God…

    3. This was my hardest… My Passion…. I have not a clue any more… so my prayer is that this would yet again be revealed to me. the quote “your vision may be buried somewhere beneath the cynicism you developed as a defense” is me… The constant battle has my armor very dented and chiseled.

  16. 366
    Stephanie T says:

    Ch 14: Without a doubt the person who makes want to do what it takes to live Free of Insecurity is my almost one year old daugther. Bella Grace. She is my inspiration for this transformation. She has brown hair and the biggest brown eyes youve ever seen. Her little teethe are coming in from here there and everywhere , the 2 most prominent being right in the middle on the bottom. She is regal yet delicate. She will point her chubby finger at whatever it is she wants and simply say.. go.. and fully trusts to get wherever it is she wants to go. That simple trust that only a child can give, makes me accutely aware of the responsibility I have to provide the correct answers to womanhood, provide a WHOLE example of a woman, wife and mom. It is a chance to do something right for once!

    CH15: In this last week a big story broke about a young girl who committed suicide because of the harrassment of her classmates.. Apparently, one of her attackers wanted her boyfriend, or felt she was taking him from her. The things these classmates wrote and said about her will make your skin crawl..There are now around 8 lives affected by this tragedy because not only is a young life gone, but every one of the teens involved are facing maximum charges in her death. My friend called me and told me about this story. She asked me what are we gonna do about our girls? How are we gonna teach them to value themselves so this doesnt happen to them? And, I replied, How are we going to teach them to value OTHERS so this doesnt happen to them. Our conclusion.. Showing them who they are in Christ every day of their lives. It’s easy to say, but when mamma is broken and weak its not a chance for my girl. Things have to change.. NOW…
    When reading this chapter, it was life changing, probably the most profound chapter of any book I have ever read. What these girls and boys did was depersonalize another human being. She was their rival. She was their enemy. They erased her humanity and that made it oh so easy to be ugly, to even be brutal..I would probably not have gotten that without this chapter.

    Ch:16.. My passion first and foremost is to be a proverbs 31 noble woman. To be that wife, mother and woman.. But, beyond that, I would very much like to write a devotional for women who have children with disorders such as autism, add, adhd, turrettes, downs syndrome, developmental delays, aspergers, and the list goes on. I have searched high and low for a book like this, and as far as I know they are few and far between. These moms need specific verses, specific wisdom to help them thru this journey. Grief, emotional distress, physical fatigue, depression, wanting to give up, we need a devotional to help us make it every day.

    • 366.1
      Diane says:

      WOW~ what a scarey story.Is there an article I could look up to see more on this story? What a harsh word our children are in and how important for them to understand the responsibility or their words and actions.
      I encourage you to write this devotional!!! Moms with high need kids DO need to know wisdom for the day as they cope, deal with teachers and specialists and even those constant reminders that life is just different from ‘normal’. My oldest could fit that although he’s never been labeled, and it’s hard to not be able to identify with other mom’s parenting experiences. THAT would be a insecurity trigger!!

  17. 367
    AnnaRuth says:

    DFW, Texas

    1. My daughter. She is coming up on her 6th birthday, and there is so much of me in her that it terrifies me. Her father left while I was still pregnant with her, and only re-emerged for a weekend when she was right at 4 months old. He committed suicide a week later. I thought that weekend was a new hello, not a last goodbye. So not only is she having to grow up without a father, she is growing up with a mess of a mother. I have so many insecurities, (stemming from childhood…my experience with my husband was just the icing on the cake) and I don’t want to pass them on to her. I gave away my dignity at a young age – I want to to know from even this time in her life that this dignity is HERS and is given to her by God Himself, and that NO ONE can take it away!! They don’t have the right!

    She is a wonderfully sensitive girl. She takes on the pain and trials of others. I am the same way. It was beaten into me (not physically) over the years of my growing up that my sensitivity was a horrible thing, and that my relationships were worse off because of it. Only now am I beginning to understand that it is how God made me, and it should be celebrated and cherished, rather than simply tolerated and shoved in a corner. I want to teach this to her so badly. That she is who God made her to be, and that is a wonderful thing, and it is worth grabbing hold of with all her might!

    2. What stood out to me the most in this chapter was the repetition of the thought of “infectious security.” I want to be that woman. I want to be the woman in the room that, while she isn’t perfect, she’s got that…something. That look in her eye, that air about her that says that she’s dignified, that says she’s secure. Because think of the women you’ve ever experienced like that. You’re drawn to them because you feel SAFE with them. I want to be that safe harbor. I want to be that example for what God-given cloak of dignity can look like on human, imperfect flesh. I’m going to begin going about that by choosing to cling to my dignity, and to deliberately work on NOT comparing myself to every single other woman I’ve ever encountered!

    3. Honestly? Him. I am so in love with my Jesus, and that’s one of the reasons that my pits of sin and my insecurities have tormented me this much; I feel like a hypocrite. How can I love Him this much and yet hurt Him as badly as I must? But when Beth asked us this same question in the book, that was the absolute first thought that came to mind. He is my passion. I have a dream of working with teenage girls in the future. Of teaching them how available God is to them. Teaching them how to study their Bibles and how to make His Word alive to them. And showing them their worth in His eyes. I wish someone had done that for me, and I would love to do that for them! I am praying that if it falls into His will, He’ll open doors, otherwise to show me what other direction He wants me to go in.

    [email protected]

  18. 368
    Anonymous says:

    1.My middle school students are worth doing what it takes to live abundantly and effectively in Christ. Unfortunately, when I graduated from college I was naive to some of the issues that,I as a teacher, would face in the classroom. Early in my teaching career, I had an eighth grade student that asked me if she could be excused from class activites. My obvious question, why? The look on this child’s face pretty much confirmed what I had thought all along. She proceeded to tell me that she had been up most of the night with her sick one year old child. Yes, a mother to a one year old at age 15! At that moment, the last thing that girl needed to hear from me was the importance of an education. Yes, education is very important! But that child needed to know that she had value; that she was loved; and that there was hope in spite of past mistakes.God has so much more for her. Yes,by all means these children are worth doing what it takes.

    2. To set a Godly example for these children and to encourage them in their journey.

    3.If you had ask me this question a year ago, I would have told you my passion was and has always been in the area of service and helping others. I still love it!But for the last year,God has place such a passion deep within my heart for prayer. I have a love for His word/scripture like no other time in my life. Doing the scriptures with you and the other siestas last year was a godsend! While I have always enjoyed learning scripture…this journey was different.He is up to something…just know it! My spirit is willing, but my flesh is fighting .You see, He is using the very thing(prayer) that has tormented me since I was a child. I love to pray for people…the problem has always been praying with people. Praying to God is so intimate…I don’t know how or feel comfortable sharing intimacy with others. I try to start my day off by yielding to Him,I so much want Him to have His way me.One day I know that He will!

  19. 369
    Lydia says:

    Lydia, single in OKC, OK. 21.

    1. Every Sunday I work in my church’s nursery 10-15 month old section. I feel a special connection with the little girls, and even though most of them can’t talk very well yet, I love to pray for them silently as I hold or play with them. For an hour and half every Sunday I love being able to take my eyes off of myself and look at life through the eyes of a child. In a lot of ways they help me reevaulate my priorities;reminding me to trust Christ with the faith of a child. Lately, I also I have been thinking a lot about the future generations in my family to follow me. I think of my future nieces and daughters. I want to make sure my issues with insecurities, angers and fears are worked out and that I’m completely depending on the Lord for strength, so I can I can help and mabye make their path easier in this world.
    2. Don’t quickly judge women I come into contact with. Love them as Jesus loves them.
    3. Right now I couldn’t say that I know what my specific passion/purpose is. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my ultimate passion is to bring glory to Christ with my life. I have many loves like traveling, helping people, working behind the scenes, taking care of little details, planning, art, reading and fashion. I just don’t know how all those things come together. I know that I want to get married and start a family, but obviously I can’t make that my passion (at least right now) because the Lord hasn’t brought that special someone into my life yet.

  20. 370
    Lindsay says:

    Playing catch up….but I guess better late than never.
    1. I don’t have one girl in particular. I am a college student that helps with the junior high and high school student ministries at my church. The girls that I encounter every week are my inspiration. All of these girls are at different places and have different personalities, but I feel like I can relate to each and every one of them in one way or another. I want to be someone they can turn to. I strive to be an example to them.
    2. I am going to stop making comparisons and I am going to start personalizing other women.
    3. Like I said earlier, I help with the student ministries. I have a heart for the girls that fall in that age group. I was in their shoes only a few years ago and in some ways I still am. I can relate to them. I know how hard it is when you have friends pressuring you to just drink one beer and guys pressuring you to cross the line you have drawn. I want to be there for them when they face these things. I have been praying about starting a bible study (another more recent passion) with them. My only hang up is that I have been swamped with school work and also, talking in front of people is a huge fear I have. The student pastor actually just spoke with me last week about starting one, before I had even mentioned this to him. I’m honestly terrified. But it’s something I’m really praying about. I know I will love it, but I have to toughen up and get past my fear. 🙂

    Mobile, Al
    20 years old

  21. 371
    Michelle says:

    1. I have a group of 8th grade girls that I lead each Wednesday in a small group at church. These girls are often a huge highlight to my week and encourage me to keep investing by their smiles, their hardships, and their sweet, innocent hearts. I want nothing more than to be an example of Christ to them, and for them to cling to Jesus so tightly that they depend on Him as their rock and salvation throughout the hard high school and college years. I find myself wanting to protect them yet I know that they each have a journey that only Christ can hold their hands and keep their heads above water through. They have come to mean so much to me and I would easily do anything for them! What a blessing they have been to me and an inspiration to keep following my Lord!

    2. I’m extremely guilty of sizing up a room of females and ranking myself like you speak of on page 279. One huge way I can start becoming part of the solution is to remove the competition between females. For this highly competitive girl, this is hardest when I first meet another female or when I’m in a crowd. Once a girl has become a close friend I do feel that most of the competitiveness wears off and my heart becomes softer – especially if she’s another believer. But I need to be prepared to let go of my insecurities and pride when meeting “contenders” and think of them instead as other humans on this journey who have their own stories, joys, and hurts. I also learned a lot by reading the part where we can hurt other women by being a threat. I think this goes hand in hand with being competitive and often we women want to seem that we have it all together and want to be seen as a threat to others, on top of our game. You couldn’t be more right on how this actually backfires though, and hurts others and their relationships.

    3. My current passion that God has laid on my heart has been the discovery and the desire to use micro-finance to help those less fortunate around the world. Micro-finance is the lending of small loans to individuals so that they can turn around and use that loan to establish a successful business and then in turn, make a profit and pay back the loan they began with. I have done months of research and every time I learn more about what God is accomplishing through finance in the missions world, I become so excited and passionate! I truly feel that micro-finance enables me to mix to passion for people in 3rd world countries and my love of business for God’s glory!

    OKC, OK

  22. 372
    becca banana says:

    1) There are two girls on my street who were just recently adopted. Both are hungry for attention and I want to minister to them and show them what a secure, spirit-filled woman looks like! And of course, I have two daughters, a toddler and an infant, who are VERY worth living abundantly for Christ!

    2) I can look out for girls in my middle school classroom who are struggling, who need someone to stand up for them and show them the way.

    3) Meals ministry is my new-found passion.

    Salem, Oregon

  23. 373
    Cara says:

    1)My inspirations are my three children. I have a 9 year old daughter and a 10 month old daughter. I also have a 3 year old son. They each deserve to have a Mom that is secure in Christ and does not continue to let insecurities control her life. I want my girls to grow up to be the things I wasn’t.

    2)The two things that stood out to me that I can do is to one stop comparing myself to others. In good ways and bad ways. To stop determining that I am worthless because I can’t do what so and so does but also to not feel good about myself because I don’t do what so and so does. The other thing was to personalize other women. I find for me that there are only a few women I have done this to and they probably don’t even know it and won’t know when I stop doing it.

    3) I feel passionate that kids should have a voice in courts.Too often their best interest gets lost. I know that is a passion I will work with at some point but right now I am deep in babies, toddlers and a 9 year old who is well 9 LOL! It is something I have thought about for several years and over time God has used personal experiences to reaffirm to me what I will be doing at some point.

    Riverview, FL
    married- 30’s.

  24. 374
    Michele says:

    1.) Sorry, it’s taken me so long to get on here, but I had some of those little ones staying at my house for about a week, that we are talking about in question 1. I have two little nieces, (who are right now, both three years old and a nephew who is seven).Imagine chubby, rosey cheeks. Naturally curly hair. Big blue eyes (for the girls) and the boy, big brown. Imagine lots of laughter and LOTS of running! Smart and funny. There you have them.
    I can ALREADY see affects of this world on their little minds and hearts. I want to live so differently than anything they see or hear that it impresses upon them how much they should love and trust their Heavenly Father and take Him at His Word.
    2.)Something that God had brought to my attention a few years ago, was what actually comes out of our mouths, so others can hear, about our insecurities, and how much that affects ourselves and those around us. An example. There were a good number of ladies that really struggled with an insecurity about weight at a church we were attending. It came out in “funny” little jokes about themselves. Everyone joking about how “fat” they were. After I was married a bit (and gained a bit) I noticed myself, doing the same thing. It was like it was so imbedded in our speach and daily behavior that I took that kind of “joking” on, too. Honestly, it still affects the way I view myself some days. BUT, the thing that stopped me in my tracks was when I said something in front of one of those dear precious little ones (in the above question). God stopped me right then, and let me see how that could affect them, even now, as young as they are. I am so thankful to Him for showing me that, but I guess one thing I can do is watch what I think and how that comes out verbally for ANYONE to hear. I DO NOT want to be part of the problem!
    3.)My passion?! Hmmmmm. I guess I’d have to say, what isn’t a passion. I guess how God has made me, I seem to be on a soapbox about something or other quite a bit. I’ll have to really think on this one. Children. Women. Anything or anyone mistreated. People to know the Lord…I think I could just keep going and going…

  25. 375
    Andrea S. says:

    1. My persons are my two step-daughters. They are so different from each other, but I see such a struggle with insecurity in both of them. My sweet Jenn has always struggled with her weight-much like myself- and has had people tell her that she is fat, and truly she is NOT that heavy at all, it’s so hard for me to see so many of the same heart-breaking struggles in her that are in me. To me there is nothing harder as a parent than to see your struggles mirrored in your children. My sweet Kara is such an introvert and was always so fearful of making friends, she struggles most of my three kids with abandonment issues as well. She is such a gentle spirit who has a TRUE LOVE for other people, but I see her lack of confidence stumble her so much! It is becoming so clear to me that they feed off what I do and say. When I can’t even prove to be secure in the way God made me….how can I convince them of the same thing? I want to kick this thing at long last so that they can begin to renew and heal their thinking and take hold of the life that lays before them!

    2. God has been pounding this one into me lately. I simply need to lead by example. I want people to see my inner security, confidence and peace that God is in control of my life and that I refuse to WASTE another second of my life becoming overcome by fear and anxiety of what may never even come to fruition.

    3. I have felt a strong calling to mission work in Africa for years, but my life has happened in the process. I very much still feel the stirrings and longings in my heart to be the hands and feet of Jesus to those sweet sweet faces of children who are suffering or orphaned as a result of the AIDS pandemic there.

    Moorhead, MN

  26. 376
    Texas married says:

    1) My daughter, who is the most thoughtful person I know, is so insecure that she stays in a job she hates, but is too fearful to change. She is intelligent and creative, but believes she is “less than”. I feel that I have failed her because I was such a mess when she was growing up. I do not want to fail her daughters; I don’t want the two of us to fail them.
    2)I am around a large number of teenage girls and try to build them up. A “hard” exterior, disrespect for any authority figure, and a rebellious attitude are attempts of a hurting young woman to show they’re in charge; when in reality, they’re scared to death.
    3) My passion is for women to be zealous about studying God’s word and depending on him for answers to life’s problems; that they would live for God’s glory instead of being a casual Christian.

  27. 377
    Robin says:

    Chapter 14 – My inspiration is my wonderful 5 year old daughter. God knew exactly what I needed when he gave her to me. She looks exactly like me and everyone calls her little Robin. When you see yourself (the good and the bad) reflected in a 2,3,4,5 year old, it really makes you examine yourself. My spiritual growth in the past 5 years has been because of her and God’s mercy. She has inspired me to search for a more personal relationship with God and I pray that I can pass the importance of a personal relationship with God on to her. I have been a Christian for many years but never knew the personal relationship with God could be so much more than bible studies and going to church and learning all the don’ts. Because of her I want to be a better Christian woman with joy and peace in my life. Thank You God for my daughter Erin.

    Chapter 15 – I want to be part of the solution by allowing God to perform the miracle healing in me first. Then I pray He will use me to help my daughter learn about security as early as possible and that security will spread to everyone my daughter and I meet. After my eyes have been open through this book, I see women in a whole new light. I see them more personalized and realize how many women are hurting. I immediately wanted to help everyone, but God made me realize I can only help one at a time starting with myself. I need healing first before I am capable of helping anyone else. Thank you God for the healing you are performing in me and guide me in raising my daughter to be secure in You.

    Chapter 16 – My passion, I honestly don’t know. I went from being a daughter living with my parents to being a wife married to a wonderful husband. I sometimes feel that I never got to grow up and become my own person. I wanted to please my parents and then I wanted to please my husband. I have found out more about myself since I have had my daughter. As stated earlier when I see myself (the good and the bad) reflected in her, I see myself much clearer. I have realized that it is more important to please God than man. Growing up in a Christian home with a minister for a Dad, I was a Christian but I didn’t really have a personal relationship with God like I should. I knew the God my Mom and Dad talked about and all that I learned in church, but to really get serious about a Me and God relationship, I had not done that. This journey for me has shown me more clearly that God loves me and wants a one on one relationship with me. Not a relationship through my parents or the church or bible study, but one on one with me (me in the process of becoming secure). I came to a place where I knew being a Christian had to be better than what I was experiencing. God saved my soul so I know he can give me joy and peace. Life happens but God is always there and never changes. I guess for now my passion is to be the best wife and mother God will help me to be and the best daughter of God I can be. And who knows what God has in store for me now, in my new found security, the possibilities are endless. YOU ARE AN AWESOME GOD. 🙂

  28. 378
    Kim says:

    Well I finally finished chap 16 today. In fact I finished the rest of the book as well. What a journey. Ok on to this posts questions.

    1. For my 3 daughters. The oldest is a girly, girl, plays the viola, violin and piano. Can you guess what her major is?:) She is in college and feels the need to get straight A’s. She feels that she is doing horribly if she gets a B. She is a natural born leader and can convince a rock that her opinions are right. I mean that in the nicest way. My middle daughter is more of a tomboy. She enjoys soccer and racket ball. She also plays the trumpet, and the guitar. She is very easy going, has a voice that carries and loves to be on the go. She, too, has strong opinions but is quieter about them. She will graduate from High school this year and wants to be a teacher. She is a very good teacher. Kids just naturally flock to her, they always have. She just has a natural way with them. My youngest daughter just turned 12. She is a mix of both her older sisters. She play the violin and piano. She also like some sports. She has a very tender heart. She feels so bad for someone who is hurt or sad, but she also rejoices greatly with those who are rejoicing. They all have an incredible relationship with the Lord.

    2. I am trying to be more positive and constructive in a loving manner in what I say and do. Not sure that conveys what I want to say exactly, I am just not sure how to say it. I want to be one that build up and not tears down. I want to help and encourage and not be part of the problem.

    3. My passion, Hmmm, is to see women live in freedom. To hellp them to live up to their full potential in Christ.

    50 yrs.
    Thatcher, AZ

  29. 379
    Kim Davis says:

    2. In helping our own gender’s issue with insecurity I will pray for my “rivals” or “competitors,” and I will try to do something nice for those that truly don’t “get along with.” Because one of the highest forms of spiritual warfare is doing something nice and heartfelt for my enemy or my “rival.” I also will not “pick” on and highlight other women’s insecurities.

  30. 380
    Meggie says:

    1. I’ve got three daugthers and I want them to live their lives in freedom, the only freedom we can really have, IN JESUS! My girls are so precious to me, I don’t want them repeating things I’ve done. They are my inspiration to follow Jesus with all my heart!

    2. “Start personalizing other women” is helping me right now, whenever I’m tempted to fall into my old thought patterns. And I definitely don’t want to “trip another woman’s insecurity switch”. LORD, help me, give me lots of wisdom here!

    3. I’ve got a passion for organizing events. And to organize our Women’s Bible studies is my deep passion. God has been so good to me, he brought me into this group of women who help me realize my passion. God is good!!!

  31. 381
    WorthyofLove says:

    Answers to the Questions

    1. Wren Micheal Whipple. She is the daughter of one of my VBFF. She is three and every ounce a girl! She loves to play hard, sing, and dance. She pretends to give her Daddy haircuts. (That is their special thing.) I wonder if one day she will come to me with questions. No matter. I know she will be watching me. Her mother and I match make for her with one of my three boys. Who know’s, perhaps one day she will be a daughter of my heart. She’s worth it.

    2. How can I look out for our gender? Be nice and friendly to the “prettier” “smarter” girl – realizing that she has insecurities too. Learn to personalize others.

    3. My Passion – I’m praying about it.

    Michelle Clinton
    San Antonio, TX
    30’s Married

  32. 382

    I am coming in late, as I have been keeping up pretty well with the reading, but falling behind in the comments.

    1. Who inspires me to keep going this path? My daughter, Marina. She is only 4, yet loves to dress like a princess. I want her to always feel like a princess in God’s eyes, no matter the curve balls that get thrown at her during her life. I want her to always know deeply in her heart that she is securely God’s daughter – and that nothing can take her out of His hands. I also have a 24 year old friend who is starting to live with my family, renting a downstairs room from us – seeking her independence from her family, and dependence on God. She is plagued by insecurities, and I want to be able to model to her, through this journey of mine, what it looks like to walk the path towards security in Christ.

    2. I need to stop making comparisons between myself and other women. build them up without tearing myself down, and also not try to make myself look better (in my own head) by tearing down another woman in my head and depersonalizing them.

    3. You are right, Beth in saying that our deepest passion can be traced back to the point of our deepest pain. I work part time, I have 2 small children and a husband. I am knee, no shoulder deep in things to do, juggling schedules, kids, friends, work, and millions of loads of laundry. At the same time, I have a passion to help other women. Hurting women. Women stuck in self doubt, “God-doubt,” insecurity, depression, grief and despair. I have been all those places. Still am at times. I don’t know when/if God will have me ever step out in some sort of women’s ministry position. However, I am seeing opportunities He is setting right in my path. Taking in my 24 yr old friend and helping her get her feet under her, financially and spiritually and emotionally. God leading me to a mentor who has walked with me through some of my deepest valleys yet, but also who has allowed me to walk with her, and hold her up in prayer and minister to her. If just these two people were the only ones that God ever puts in my path, I know that I have reached out pursuing the passion God placed in my heart. Knowing Him, He will do even more – if I am ready to take Him at His word and step out finally in the security of who I am in Him!

  33. 383
    abraham's daughter says:

    Spring break interrupted my reading, but I wanted to finish before Saturday.
    1. My daughters, who are now mothers, are my inspiration. I spent too many years in spiritual mediocrity and want to model a true walk in Christ.
    2. I have done daycare for over 25 years and it was my husband who pointed out to me that I have as much of a ministry to the “Moms” as I do to their children.
    3. My passion is leading Bible study–for women to hunger and thirst for the Word to know and love Jesus. I long for women to find freedom and purpose in Christ.

    Grand Rapids, MI

  34. 384
    HFridelle says:

    1) I’m not a mother yet but I would like to do it for my cousin and my goddaughter. I just want to be a better role model for them now, to inspire them to be educated and more Godly women. And when I have children, I pray to be rid of all insecurities so I don’t leave them as my legacy. We need to stop the cycle of insecurity and find our strength and dignity in Christ!!
    2) I want to be the role model of security for my friends and family, even those who don’t know me that well. I want to encourage people, especially women, and not bring them down. I want to everyone to see God in me. I know I specifically need to be friendlier to those who I don’t know that well. I tend to be shy or insecure and that may come off as snobby or arrogant, and I don’t want to be that way anymore.
    3) What is my passion? I guess I haven’t ever thought about my true passion. There are things I like to do, but I don’t consider passions. After thinking long and hard about this, I think my passion is wanting people to know that God’s grace and mercy is with them through their toughest trials. I have been through a lot in my life and I think God wants to use that to minister to people, especially women. I pray that God opens my eyes to see the opportunities that He lays out before me! I know that I know, that God is there for me and He’s there for you too!

  35. 385
    Fran says:

    1 — Nikki (With 2 k’s she reminds me when I spell it with 1). She is a young lady from a low income area that we pick up on our bus ministry at church. She is part of our Wednesday night Discovery Club for children of all ages when she comes. She tends to run when God is getting close to her. Every now and then I call and leave her a vocie mail to let her know I miss her. When I first met her she had a boyfriend who hung all over her. I pulled her to the side after a few visits to our church and said, “you are too pretty to let a guy hang on you like that”. She still loves the guys and I think has had at least 4/5 new boyfriends in the last 2 years. But she keeps coming back to church. She is in an area where the women expect the men to take care of them. Education is low on the list and living together is high. She needs to know that God loves her more than anyone else and it doesn’t take a man to make you happy (even though I totally and completely love mine) and that she can be happy in herself (kind of ironic coming from me the co-dependent. I don’t have right but I am trying). Please pray for myself and the other ladies in our church that we can inspire these girls to love God first and most of all.
    2 — To walk reflecting “my security” in God with my head held high, confident in my God-given abilities, and able to say so when someone says what about you has changed.
    3 — My spiritual children; those from broken/blended/single parent homes who just want to be loved.

  36. 386
    Stacy says:

    I am so sorry that it has taken me such a long time to respond! I just had to try to provide my answers prior to our event this Saturday. As a teacher, I had such guilt in not completing my homework.
    1) My daughter is my inspiration. At 18, she is fully aware that I have lived with insecurities on a variety of levels throughout my life. As a matter of fact, she saw those insecurities with my physical appearance, when I had the tummy tuck and liposuction. She is the one who helped care for me after that surgery. I remember her strength in helping me through one of the most costly mistakes I’ve ever made. Although I thought that I’d worn a strong/secure mask in front of her at all times, she certainly saw right through it. I was always so concerned about my thoughts, actions, appearance, etc.,yet she did not follow in my footsteps in that regard, and I am so thankful for that! She seems to be at peace with herself–strong in her beliefs, opinions, actions, etc. She is not overly concerned with her appearance either. I wish I had the ability to be as down to Earth, as real, as she is. I thank God for the fact that she has been spared from all of the pain I’ve endured. But, there is evidence that some of my insecurity has taken root in her. One instance is that she worries to the point of making herself physically ill. She is so nervous about driving, in fact, that she has not gotten her license yet. I will be working with her this summer to have confidence in her abilities and obtain her license before college begins. I have been very open with her about my insecurity issues during the last few months in doing this study, and I hope to break the cycle, so that it does not continue in her or her future children. That is my goal. She has seen that, although I am far from perfect, I have been willing to admit my faults, ask forgiveness and pray for God to help me learn, grow and change.
    2) I am blessed to have the opportunity to teach my students–which is a way that I can look out for young girls’ security. I can lift them up with words of praise and help them to become confident within themselves. (It is ironic that it has always been easy for me to do this for others, but it has been impossible for me to have confidence, or believe, in myself.)
    3) This question provides the reason that it took me so long to respond to this assignment. I have NO passion!!!!! I have nothing that makes me feel fully alive or part of something bigger than life. I feel like I’m existing–without any real joy in the journey. That difficult realization prevented my response. I hope that God shows me. May He provide healing, peace and joy for me through Mama Beth’s words on Saturday.

  37. 387
    Deirdre says:

    1. someone who makes this worth doing? myself. bright eyed, enthusiastic, wonderful, God-loved ME. Also my wonderful husband and our precious 20 month old girl. She is adopted and that adds all kinds of issues to the normal teenage girl insecurities that she will face. but we are doing our best to immerse her in Gods teachings about her worth and security NOW. I just have to be a good example or it will all be for naught.

    2. how can I help be a part of the solution? be a friend. Be an honest, God-driven, helpful friend to the other people in my life.

    3. I am hip deep in mommy-hood right now, BUT I do have two passions.
    a. I love to help heighten the impact of any message or presentation with good environmental and ambiance design. Set-design really. But it goes beyond that. I continually find myself involved in doing the behind the scenes directing of projects for the stage at our church.
    b. the thing I have the most fun with is helping someone to feel that their home is a comforting place. give me $100 and i can take someone on a whirlwind tour of Target or Bed Beth & Beyond and make their house just a little bit more homey. Yes, I’m a decorator at heart, but I don’t get nearly as much kick out of decorating for someone who can afford it as I do out of taking someone who has always felt like she wasn’t worthwhile and didn’t deserve something pretty and changing her mind. We did a total (and I do mean TOTAL) renovation and cleaning project when we set my destitute brother up in a trailer. Yes, after all that cleaning and effort (and yes, expense) we could have just gone to the local goodwill and picked up odds and ends for them. But it made our hearts SING to surprise them with a full coordinated bath set, kitchen towels that matched their dishes and bed spreads with matching curtains. They told me later that they felt like new people.
    We had the privilege of doing the same thing for our baby’s birth parents. Not on the same scale, but we did get to help them make their apartment more like a home.
    It’s not about giving the physical stuff. It is about how it makes the recipient BEAM.

    I think I need to check to see if Habitat for Humanity has a decorating squad that I can be a part of. ……..


  38. 388
    sepik-meri katie says:

    katie, 20’s, wewak PNG, single

    1. my little sister. she is 12 (or 13…?) and that is such an awkward age ANYWAY! besides the major upheaval and instability of our family this last year especially. i would have given my 2 eyes for a big sister to help me navigate the waters at that time in my life and she has more to deal with than i did. my life will manifest Christ to her and i will show her what a grounded, secure-in-Christ woman looks like! we have it(HIM) in us!!

    3. my passion lies in the deepest jungles of papua new guinea and is for the precious souls there, ones for whom Jesus died, ones also with God-given dignity to reclaim! my life will be poured out and spent alongside the precious women there, living life with them and seeing them grow in understanding and relationship with Christ, and then passing that on to the ones coming behind THEM. oh, words do not even touch my passion and love for them, or the incredible excitement in seeing their minds shift when they hear the Truth. i could spend my days nowhere else. HE is so worthy. of my trust and theirs! o God, be glorified!

  39. 389
    Katie says:

    Firestone, CO

    1. The one who is worth doing what it takes to live abundantly and effectively in Christ is my sweet daughter Grace. She is my firstborn with big brown eyes and as tenderhearted and emotional as they come. Being so sensitive, it will do her good to see security in her momma!

    2. Like you said, Beth, I wish I could discuss this chapter with you in person. I can honestly say, I have ONE friend (who I rarely talk with because we live so far away) who I am genuine and transparent with. I have such a hard time making friendships with women because of so much of what you wrote about in Chapter 15. Anyway, to answer the question…

    I am going to work to stop comparing myself. I will value other women for who God has made them and work at developing the gifts He’s given me and stop wishing I were someone else.

    3. Thank you for the encouragement that my toddlers (3 kids 4 and under) are a priority and need to be my passion. Our culture certainly distracts from that!

    Once I do have a little more time on my hands, my passion is to working with women who are unexpectedly pregnant and considering abortion.

    My other passion is working with children. I love sharing the gospel with little ones and investing time in their lives.

  40. 390
    Patty says:

    1.)My wonderful, beautiful daughter and my equally wonderful, beautiful ‘daughter-in-love’, also the younger women I mentor and am friends with at church. Each unique and special, and yet each is such a gift to me from God. We’re all on this journey through life on earth, and whatever progress I can make in becoming more secure in my identity in Christ will benefit our relationships and then eventually, God-willing, with any granddaughter(s) that He sends our way.
    2.)Not be so focused on appearances, mine or others’, and make a concerted effort to affirm and compliment others based on their inner qualities and the service they are rendering to others and the Lord.
    3.)My passions are music: praise and worship music and Prayer/Intercession. I do believe they go hand in hand, but I’m asking the Lord how far out of the ‘prayer closet’ He wants to take them and me.

  41. 391
    Patty says:

    forgot again to post my info:
    Kingwood, TX

  42. 392
    MollyDolly says:

    1) My big inspiration is my little sister. Always feeling that she’s never smart enough, thin enough, girly enough, she has acquired bitterness and fear. I hope I can be secure to show her that it is not only possible for me, but for her. I still struggle with how to do this without becoming arrogant, or without her taking it that way, at least.


    3) The way he wants me to do this is less clear. I am a musician and have a deep passion for it, but sometimes am unclear about how this lifestyle fits with a marriage and possibly kids. I am waiting expectantly for God to reconcile these seemingly mis-matched goals.

  43. 393
    Bobbie Trackwell says:

    Hello there! I couldn’t figure out how I could send a comment to Beth so I chose this Blog because right now our women’s ministry is reading this for our summer book club. I just felt a need to tell her a few things. I am a woman with quite a past!(YOU could write a book on it!) I always “had a belief in God” but I didn’t have a “relationship” with Him until I took a Beth Moore Bible study. After that my heart & mind opened up to The Word. I still haven’t reached a mature level but am a work in progress. But let me tell you, since I began my journey the devil sure has tried harder to knock me down. (Another book YOU could write! haha) I just want to thank you for sharing all you do, your honesty & how great of a teacher you are by using reality of everyday life & scripture together to help us understand more. You are a blessing! “I want to be just like you when I grow up!” Much love!

  44. 394
    rhonda says:

    1. My future daughter-in-laws. The mothers of my grandchildren. The wives of my men children. So that I may raise boys who don’t have mom with a ton of issues, so I set them up to be able to recognize, respect, and cherish women who are secure in Christ Jesus and so I am not a MIL who can’t let her men children go be men. Hope that makes sense.
    2.Right now, encouragement. How can I serve them? How can I help them? Picking them up when they are down and encouraging them.
    3. Teaching and writing bible studies. May I acknowledge the extreme insecurity that just popped up even now writing those words on this blog. In His hands and I will trust:)

  45. 395
    limewire pro says:

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  46. 396
    Laura Cron says:

    I am so excited! I started this study with a friend…and now, just a week more to go. This book has helped me immensely~ such freedom, knowing I am clothed with strength and dignity.

    I have kept a journal and wrote all my answers down in. And It has helped me to read some of the sharing on this blog…We are soooo not alone, in this Journey. I am so grateful, God has led me to reading this book and so blessed to be open to Gods healing touch.

    Much love and thanks!

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