Jones Family Update

Howdy, Siestas! I feel like I should introduce myself again because it’s been so long since I’ve written. Our summer was b-u-s-y but wonderful. Curtis preached at a Bible study gathering called Metro and at a few churches in our area, I led the Ruth study with some blogging girlfriends, we hosted out of town family members, went to Galveston a couple of times, and did lots of swimming and playing with the kids. Tomorrow Jackson and Annabeth will start pre-k and mother’s day out, so I suppose summer is coming to an end for us. Our normal Wednesday church schedule picks back up tonight and I can’t wait to see all the fellowship supper crowd. We have been missing everyone! Jackson gets to join the kids choir as of tonight. I think he is going to love it.

I have a little story to tell you that will explain my recent absence here on the blog. One day in June I was trying to get some work done and I went into the dining room (away from the kids) so I could concentrate. A few minutes later Jackson came running over to me and said, “Annabeth is on the TV!” What in the world? I ran in the living room to find my 16-month-old walking on the console behind the flatscreen and about to dive off into a pile of toys. Needless to say, I was horrified. I brought my laptop back in the living room and tried to finish whatever I was doing. A few minutes later I looked down and saw Annabeth sitting on our golden retriever’s back. All she needed was a saddle and she had her own little pony. I was horrified again! Beckham is a very patient dog and he loves the kids, but that was not okay. I was bit in the face by our family dog as a child and I know better than to trust any animal completely. This happened three feet away from me and I didn’t see it because of my computer screen.

I knew my days of working at home were coming to an end. I either needed to return to the office or stop working. Not only was it becoming unsafe for my children, but I constantly felt frustrated and discouraged as an employee and as a mother. I’m sure many of you can relate to how I was feeling. It was maddening because the world tells women we can have it all – career, romance, family, friends, leisure, and a peaceful home Ā – but the truth is we are all making sacrifices in one or more of these areas in order to carry the others. I felt like my entire family was revolving around me and my needs, when what my soul really longed for was to have the time and energy to serveĀ them.

After many conversations with Curtis, a long heart-to-heart with my mom, and lots of prayers shot up to God in desperate moments, we decided that I would take a step back from my job at LPM for the next year. I have 12 months left with my son before he begins kindergarten and I want to make the most of that time. Next fall we will reevaluate our situation.

I confess I was really nervous to talk to my mom about this. It can be complicated when family members work together. But in my heart I kept hearing my mom say, “No amount of success in ministry can make up for failure at home.” My mom has kept to that after all these years and I’ve benefitted from it in countless ways. Now it was time for me to decide on my own. Would I choose what was best for my family? I could not have imagined how graciously my mom Ā would respond to my cries for help. She was 100% mom and 0% boss in that moment. She told me that when she’d kept the kids the weekend before, she’d sensed that this was coming.

Once Curtis, Mom and I were on the same page, I felt a flood of relief and joy. For about three hours. Then the seriousness of walking away from my job of 8 years came crashing over me. Satan told me the disgusting lie that I wouldn’t be important anymore. As if I should need to be important anyway! I was pretty emotional – swinging from extreme happiness and relief to sadness – for a few weeks. In fact, during that time I wrote two other versions of this post that I deemed too melodramatic to publish.

It’s been two months since the decision was made and a little less time since I handed over my administrative responsibilities to my co-worker, Kimberly McMahon/KMac. She is an awesome lady and I’m very thankful for the gifts God has given her.

Our family is definitely enjoying the harvest from this change. I feel a lot more peace. And that’s a pretty big deal! My relationship with Jackson has improved dramatically. He needed me to say yes more. I’ve been cooking, which my husband appreciates. I will say, though, that motherhood is hard any way you slice it! Can I get an amen? Did this make my life perfect? Uh, no. Did I magically become Supermom? I wish. But do I like motherhood more? Yes. Definitely.

Mom has invited me to keep writing here whenever I have something to share and I look forward to doing that. I will finally have some alone time now that Annabeth is starting mother’s day out and Jackson will be inPre-K. Praise the Lord!

I know that many of you reading this are desperate for your situation – whatever that may be – to change. Please know that when you cry out to the Lord, He hears you! He knows what you are going through. He is your Shepherd and He cares for you. Pray, pray, pray. First Peter 5:7-8 says, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (NIV) I am asking God to show you His love, power and care right now.

Siestas, thank you for loving my family and for supporting us. We love you very much.

Sincerely,

Amanda

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441 Responses to “Jones Family Update”

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Comments:

  1. 301
    Amanda says:

    Amanda, I’m so proud of you and Curtis for praying this through and making your decision. It’s the very best place for a mom to be if at all possible. I’m a teacher and I see that. For all who can’t, my prayers are so with you as well. I am going to brag on a friend of mine Cathy McBride. She recently published a Bible study through Crosswalk publishers called “Uniquely Woman” based on Proverbs 31. I love the way she did it though because she weaves a fictional bible times couple/family throughout the study. She is teaching it at our church right now. But last night, Amanda, she just taught on how we have to listen to God to know WHEN to let go of things to better serve our families. We are all very busy but if we are busy with what God gives us (reaching out our hands to the distaff) then we will have the fruit of families needs met, and our rest as well, when we need it (thus grasping the spindle). You too will grasp the spindle of fruit well sown in your family for these changes you are making. I hope you all will look up her study. It really is great and really clarifies God’s message to women in Proverbs 31.Crosswalk or Amazon.com carries her study.
    Happy Day Everyone,
    Amanda
    Olive Branch, MS

    • 301.1
      Amanda says:

      Girls I need to make a correction to my own post. I stated that my friend Cathy McBride’s Bible study was from Crosswalk. Actually it is Crossbooks Publishers (a division of Lifeway). So go to Crossbooks.com or to Amazon.com to purchase this study.

  2. 302
    Linda says:

    Amanda,
    I APPLAUD your decision to put your children above ministry! As important as ministry is (and as much of a blessing as it can be to others), our FIRST and FOREMOST ministry is to the husband and children that God has blessed us with. I know that your family (including your precious mother)will be greatly blessed because you’ve made the “hard” decision! Enjoy those sweet children…believe me, they grow up in the blink of an eye.

  3. 303
    Meghan Dawson says:

    My mom and I were having a heart to heart about this very thing not long ago. We were talking about her life. She gave up more than I can say to be at home and raise us. Once we were up and out she got a divorce, went back to school, met and married the love of her life, and got her dream job. I was feeling guilty for all the things she went through on my behalf. She just smiled and said something I’ll never forget. I am a lucky woman, I have had it all. I stayed home and raised my girls, I have a career I love, and a wonderful husband. I had it all, just not at the same time.

  4. 304
    Susan T says:

    Amanda- It is a big decision, but I know for certain that you will never say to yourself… I wish I had spent LESS time with my kids. Your greatest gift to your family is yourself and your time. Blessings to you as you continue to adjust to this change.

  5. 305
    Hollie says:

    I think it is your mom who said: ā€Ž”We cannot do a thousand things to the glory of God, but we can do a few with excellence.” I think of that all the time as I make decisions about what I say “yes” to and what I turn down. Though I’d like to love my husband well, parent my girls attentively, work from home successfully, serve my church faithfully, relish and nurture the friendships around me, etc. all to the glory of God, all these things lose their glory and become frustrating and exhausting when the demands exceed my resources. Kudos to you for acknowledging your limits and choosing to do the things that matter most to you right now with excellence. I’m encouraged by your example.

  6. 306
    Nicole says:

    Amanda,
    Just wanted you to know that I think you are doing a wonderful job as a mom. I have followed your blog for a few years now and love your heart for your hubs, kids and Jesus! As I am sure you are well aware, these first few years fly by so fast. I dont think you will ever regret your decision…might miss it, but the fruit in your sweet family will be abundant!
    Praying grace over this transition and complete joy in it all!
    Blessings
    Nicole

  7. 307
    Erin says:

    You encourage me, Amanda. Wish I knew you better. Love you.

  8. 308
    Eposi says:

    Amanda, so proud of you for seeking the Lord and following His leading and doing the hard thing. In my reading this morning, a phrase that is repeatedly used to describe the reign/life of the kings of Israel and Judah caught my attention in a fresh convicting way. Each one either did/did not do what was RIGHT IN THE EYES OF THE LORD. (Some were characterized by both.) It is so tempting for us to do things that look good in the eyes of the world, or friends, or even those we admire. It is a huge temptation for me, and I found myself crying out to the Lord again to help me be mindful that His is the only opinion that matters. It is my prayer that we all, like Paul and his partners in the Lord, “make it our ambition [or aim] to please Him” (2 Corinthians 5:9). I love that the verse says “aim,” because I have not arrived but I am shooting for that goal.

    Praying for you and your family as you seek to please Him. Looking forward to hearing from you from time to time.

  9. 309
    Kathleen says:

    Amanda,

    Way to go girl! When we made the decision to stay for me to stay home after our first was born, and I walked into my classroom for the last time, I felt like the teacher in Mr Hollands Opus…just cried and cried. In addition to church, that was my ministry. 16 years later, my oldest son is a junior in high school and my youngest son is in 8th grade, I have not regretted one day of staying home with them, not one. I have been involved in ministry since I was 18, and I am 46 and God let me continue to do that in the most creative ways! Ours has been a calling to football, baseball, sidelines, potlucks and all the while serving in Women’s Ministry as well. We have sacrificed in the material but God has allowed us to Flourish in the eternal! I could tell you story after story of His faithfulness in our obedience. Hard yes, adventure absolutely. I commend you and Curtis for your decision. The times have made it all the more difficult to raise kids, especially if you go the public route which we have. Raising warriors take alot, and I mean ALOT of time and intention. We are not seeing the rewards in so many ways.

    I can’t wait for your stories to come as you share in your new journey. A Long Obedience in the Same direction…the discipleship of your own children will delight your heart in ways you cannot imagine.

    You are a blessing to so many!

    With Love,

    Kathleen

  10. 310
    Dianna says:

    Growing up in the 60’s I believed the lie of “a woman having it all”…
    I am sure some of you out there remember the Helen Reddy song, “I am woman”?
    Or how about “I can bring home the Bacon, fry it up in a pan, & never let you forget you are man, cause I am woman!”

    What crap we were fed!!

    I have learned through hard lessons – that we as women can have it all – just NOT at the same time!

    “There is a season for everything under the sun” and Amamda now is your season to be a Mom…cherish it and do not listen to the father of lies – – being the Mom God created you to be for ‘a season’ brings Him glory <

    I thank Jesus for your wisdom <

  11. 311
    Brittany says:

    From one mom to another- I get you loud and clear!! I’m happy for you and for your little ones.
    Just don’t stop writing every now and then- I love hearing from you.

  12. 312
    Sparki2003 says:

    Amanda dearest,

    I think you are being very wise in putting your family in second place, after God and His Word being in first place, of course !

    Enjoy your dear husband and children !

    However, please send pictures over to LPM every now and then, when you get a chance. šŸ™‚

    In Christ’s Love,

    Jennifer

    Southern Wisconsin

  13. 313
    Catherine Barnett says:

    Amanda, What an incredible opportunity you have to be with your children. I work full time at a church and have been blessed by the ability to work my schedule around to be with my child after school. I am soooo blessed.

    It is so true about not having it all. I discovered a long time ago that I can “have it all”, but none of it in quantity or quality. I have learned to not take on as many responsibilities. This is so hard to do. I don’t say “no” because I want people to like me, but what happens is that I take on too much and then I don’t like me and neither does my family. I stay exhausted and crazy. What I actually have learned to say is “I am so sorry, that doesn’t work for me” most of the time that ends the conversation (on a pleasant note). What makes life so much harder is when you are in the ministry and everything you want to do or are being asked to do is “good”.

    I am learning that by trying to do everything I am asked to do or everything that needs to be done in the church or everything they can’t find a volunteer for I am stealing someone else’s blessing.

    I am so glad that you are able to do this during this time in your life. These years will be some of your best! Savor every moment and know… we will still be here when you come back.

    Thank you for all you do and share with us.

  14. 314
    Shonda says:

    Sweet Amanda,

    Thanks so much for sharing this story. I have a very similar story. When my husband and I talked it boiled down to family first. God heard our pleas and answered them beyond anything we could possibly imagine. It’s been 4 years for me and I’m loving every minute of it. There are times when it get rough but it’s very rewarding. Motherhood is far more beyond anything I could of dreamed myself. Praying for you and your sweet family.

    Many Blessings, Shonda

  15. 315
    Jes says:

    Amanda, I think that lie is satan’s favorite to use w/ young mothers and countless fall victim to it! It couldn’t be further from the truth, of course. I love to see wisdom trump foolishness and a determination to take captive our thoughts and not buy into the lie.

    I see mom’s all the time in your season of life (one which I’ve only recently graduated from). I remember the longing to say ‘yes’ to my children instead of constantly saying ‘no’ and disciplining and correcting and I’m overcome with the urge to give y’all ginormous hugs and whisper “there is a light at the end!”

    Jackson, Annabeth, and Curtis will all reap a harvest, and so will you! God bless!

  16. 316
    Jan says:

    Amanda: I am so happy for you and pray God’s blessings on you and your family. Thank you for all you do for us!

    I love these two little “poems.” I have both of them framed and hanging in beautiful calligraphy in my home. They actually refer to stopping and slowing down and enjoying our children, and they just came to mind when I read your post again. (Can you tell I’ve read them a zillion times? I typed from my heart.) Wish I could say I’ve always lived by these, but I’ll tell you one thing…GRAN JAN IS!!!

    I hope my children look back on today
    and remember a mother who had time to play.
    There will be years for cleaning and cooking,
    for children grow up while we’re not looking!

    Cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tommorrow,
    for babies grow up – we’ve learned to our sorrow.
    So quiet down cobwebs and dust go to sleep.
    I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep!

    Much love,
    Gran Jan

  17. 317
    annette says:

    I could sense last night at MidLink that you seemed happier and boy, were you having a good hair day–you looked so cute. I truly don’t know how women do it with small children. I’m so glad you’ll be able to spend time with those precious two children of yours. Ann Voskamp wrote a great blog on parenting yesterday that totally will bless you if you get the chance. Meanwhile, if you feel unimportant, just look into the eyes of those babies and see their security in having their mom’s fully engaged attention. Wishing you the best, Amanda.

    • 317.1
      Amanda says:

      Thanks, Annette. Last semester I was at the height of stress, so compared to that I’m sure I did look 100% happier! Praise the Lord! I am going on a Compassion blogger trip with Mrs. Voskamp in two weeks. Can’t wait to get to know her! Her blog is a blessing.

  18. 318
    Sarah Eccles says:

    So so important to spend as much time as you can with your children, they grow up so fast like a blink of an eye. Your children need their mommy at home. So glad you came to this decision. Your right you seem more bonded to them. I’m so glad we’ll still hear from you on the blog I love your stories and how you write. I will be praying for you that God brings that bond even closer with your family.
    Blessings Sarah

  19. 319
    Lori Ferebee says:

    Praise the Lord, Amanda. It is a great thing indeed to give your all in the roles God has given you as wife and mother. Easy, no. Rewarding and joyful, absolutely! The world and the enemy would have us believe it can’t be done. But the Truth says He will provide for you to accomplish what He has for you to do. Your husband will be blessed as well. You will show Jackson the kind of wife he should seek after and Annabeth the kind of woman she should seek to be. May God bless you and keep calling you deeper into HIS plans according to Scripture. (Deut. 6:4-9) There is no better (and usually exhausting…ha ha) place to be!

    Much love,
    Lori
    Rock Hill, SC
    (who hasn’t had time to read comments or comment herself because she is wife to pastor, mother to 6, ages 14 to 1, and joyfully homeschools to the glory and praise of God!…oh, and just moved and remodeled a house…honestly, to GOD be the glory…there’s no other way!!!)

  20. 320
    Anne says:

    Amanda, you are doing the right thing! My children are 9 and 11, and I have a huge sense of the time with them just slipping through my fingers. You will never regret putting your family first, even though it isn’t easy. God bless!

  21. 321
    Heather says:

    I enjoyed your post and especially this part -“I know that many of you reading this are desperate for your situation ā€“ whatever that may be ā€“ to change. Please know that when you cry out to the Lord, He hears you! He knows what you are going through. He is your Shepherd and He cares for you. Pray, pray, pray. First Peter 5:7-8 says, ā€œHumble yourselves, therefore, under Godā€™s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.ā€ (NIV) I am asking God to show you His love, power and care right now.”

    Thank you so much for praying for us- I am so ready for our situation to change and it is so hard to hold on and wait, but sometimes that is all we can do.

  22. 322
    Beth Herring says:

    Amanda, I applaud you for making such a hard decision, but one that you prayed about and feel is the right one for your precious family. I stayed at home until my children were in school and i am so glad that I did.

    Many blessings to you and I am praying for you all!

  23. 323
    Laura says:

    I can only imagine what a hard decision that was but I know that you did what was improtant for your family and that is what counts. Praying for you. May the LORD richly bless you and your sweet family.

  24. 324
    Donna Sava says:

    Amanda,
    I know that was a hard decision…I had to make a similar one when my boys were little! It will be the best decision of your life! Enjoy your babies while they are little…it only happens once and then they grow up!
    Hugs,
    Donna (the mom of twin boys)

  25. 325
    Nicole says:

    Amanda, I thank you for your boldness both in taking this step and sharing the process, the story. Your honesty and your obedience are a gift.

  26. 326
    Brenda says:

    Amanda:

    You are making such a life changing decision, one that I believe you will never regret. I am a mom of a 20 year old college student and a 17 year old high school student and have returned to the work world. God has faithfully provided the years for me to stay at home, and now the opportunity to return to work (just in time to pay for college!). Enjoy your time with your little ones. And when the enemy tries to tell you lies, you just kick them to the curb!

  27. 327
    Heather says:

    Amanda,
    I applaud you on your tough decision and enjoy your honesty on how tough it is being a mother. I liked the scripture you referenced at the end and thought I would look it up and write it as a memory verse. I read further and thought that the following verse 1 Peter 4:9 fit YOUR situation perfectly…”Resist him (satan), standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.” Don’t you just love God, you showed your heart to all of us and now in return we can pray for you (and one another) because we know Motherhood is the hardest job ever. Satan wants us to doubt our methods, our choices, our instincts, but we can stand firm in our faith and know we are doing the best we know how to do with God’s blessing!

  28. 328
    Becca says:

    šŸ™‚ This just brought me peace on so many levels. I got a little “God nod” in regards to my own life from it. Thanks for sharing.

  29. 329
    lori says:

    Amanda,

    I praise God for leading me to your blog tonight. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. I am in a season where I feel God is calling me to be more intimate with Him. He desires to have more of my attention. He is calling me by name. I have to put some friendships on the backburner right now in order to forgo this next season. We have pulled our children out of private school to attend public. You might think we have lost our marbles. We have too from time to time. The fact is, God called our family out to the public school to be his salt and light. We are praying for a Revolution at this private school. Far-fetched? Maybe…but God can do anything. And in Austin, TX there is an upheavel of spiritual growth and movement towards spreading the good news. This first week of school has been an amazing journey of courage for our family. Everything is going nicely and much more smooth than I could have imagined. Confirmation. Your desire to stay home and focus on your children is ADMIRABLE. I am so proud of you for having the wherewith all to see this was a need and Praise Our God that you are able to fulfill this need for your husband, yourself, and your precious children. They will reap the benefits 10 fold! I needed this connection with someone and the scripture to back it up! Thank you for spending your valuable time sharing your personal journey and testimony. I love you and pray for your journey as a stay-at-home mom to be affirmed daily. Abundant Blessings!!

  30. 330
    Ashley N says:

    I cannot tell you how timely this post is for me. I am in a season of needing change…something’s gotta give! And can I just say that I have that very verse (1pet. 5:7-8) scrawled on a post-it note, and hanging above my desk at work…as a working mama, I need to be reminded of that truth about 85 times a day. Thank you for sharing.

  31. 331
    Cathy says:

    This is a step you will never regret! I have 2 grown, (one is almost grown, at 17 they are SURE they are grown), children and I worked very part time so I could be home. Some of the jobs I had when they were little were work at home jobs. I wanted to be there for it all. As a result I have friends retiring with a full pensions and I have nothing earthly for my retirement. But I wouldn’t trade it for a moment of the time spent with my babies!

  32. 332

    I feel my heart racing because I completely relate, especially to your last paragraph.

    So much so that I wrote about Holding vs. Casting on Tuesday.

    Thanks Amanda. You have chosen wisely!

  33. 333
    Crystal says:

    Hey Amanda,

    I think you and I have been sitting in the same boat. I also had a very busy summer and I have felt this same message being sent to my heart. My oldest recently entered Kindergarten, and I have a 3 and a 1 year old at home with me. I decided to stay home since the birth of my first son 5 years ago. A year ago we moved from Houston area back home to LA and I decided to take on a heavy load of leadership at my home church and with the MOPS group. Not to mention I like to mix in a couple of bible studies; sprinkle in facebook and email and my children are jumping off the furniture as well. I had never thought of my family revolving around me and how I decided to serve my church and fellow moms.

    I just wanted to say, hearing the same message! I liked what you said about no amount of success in ministry is worth a failure at home. I know that, I just needed to be reminded.

    1 Peter 5:7 has become my theme song after Sattle Rigde Ranch VBS…”I will cast my cares on the Lord, because he cares for me, I will trust in God no matter what…”

    Crystal
    32
    Louisiana

  34. 334
    Rachel in Arizona says:

    Congrats on your decision! I got to stay home with all my kids when they were little. We didn’t always have a lot, but God truly does provide.

  35. 335
    Katie says:

    I laughed when I read your post. Not at you, but at your little one. 16 month olds are busy people. Enjoy your kids – that time with them is not wasted. I do like your regular postings so I will them. Write when AB is asleep. šŸ™‚

  36. 336
    Kimberley says:

    So glad you ignored all Satan’s lies you heard–they are so hard to resist! I stay home with my two and work from home in a very (very!) small capacity and I struggle with resisting those lies all the time. Sometimes it is so clear though–I don’t actually want it all! And yes motherhood is not for the faint of heart! It is way harder than any other work you do on every single level! I thank you for your bravery!

  37. 337
    Devanee says:

    Oh Wow Amanda,
    I so know what you are going through! I totally believe you made the right decision and God is going to bless you for it. I went through the same thing when my kids were younger. Now they are 15 and 12. I am now homeschooling them and loving it. I was working at a dental office and my husband and boys came to me and said we really want to home school. Wow what a responsibility! We prayed about it for a year and totally felt like that was what God wanted us to do. We made the move and we just started our 5th year in home schooling. It is the best thing I have ever done. God has so blessed us beyond our wildest dreams. This summer the dentist wanted me to work full time for him again and I prayed and considered it, but I truly feel that this time in my life should be dedicated to my kids! I do still work two nights a week at the dentist’s office, but that gives me a little time to myself and ability to help with the family expenses. I know God will bless your socks off for taking this time in your kids life to spend with them!

    Love and blessing,
    Devanee (Kansas)

  38. 338
    Emily says:

    Amanda, I am so thankful for this post. This is something God has really been dealing with me about for several years now. (I’m a slow learner apparently.) You are so right that it is just to much to try to have and do it all. I recently blogged about my own struggle in this area. http://encouragementfromemily.blogspot.com/2010/08/is-it-safe-to-drink-water.html#comments

    I know the joy and tirals of being at home with little ones. I pray that our Father will bless you. I know you will treasure these days! Even the not so good ones!

  39. 339
    Emily says:

    Um, tirals is a hybrid word of tired and trials for Moms of little ones. šŸ™‚

  40. 340
    Melissa May says:

    Yay for you and your family, Amanda! God knows exactly what His plans are for you and your ministry and taking a break from official work right now is NOT going to side-track your future ministry, girlfriend!!! Keep letting Jesus be your manager and He will keep you exactly on target and change your position or promote you whenever and however He wants. This very next week, I’m starting a position IN MINISTRY (HALLELUJAH!!!) after close to 10 years of full-time motherhood and it is a dream come true for me. I never had any idea how it was going to come to pass, but God did – even when I was tripping over toys and drowning in diapers 24/7. Keep trusting Him b/c He knows what He’s doing! : ) I look forward to hearing about the wonderful things God teaches you through this next season of life – not because the season will be a fantasy, but because God is always wonderful. : )

  41. 341
    Liza says:

    Amanda, thank so much for sharing your experience. I’m sure it’s one that resonates with so many women in so many ways. For me, I could identify with the lie of not being important. Leaving something “good” (a good thing, something we’re good at, and/or something that makes us feel good) can often trip us up when we forget that God’s way is “best.”
    What’s ironic is that same lie of not being important can creep up when your kids start to get more independent. Many of my stay-at-home mom friends were a mess when the kids were no longer at home. Their identity was so wrapped up in being a mom that they didn’t feel important when the kids needed them less.
    It goes to the basic lesson of our identity in Christ, doesn’t it?

  42. 342
    HeleddNest says:

    Amanda,

    Thank you for sharing this with us. It IS a lie that we can have it all easily and thanks for pointing that out again.

    God bless you on this new stage of your life.

  43. 343
    Angie says:

    Amanda- Way to go! And yes AMEN to motherhood being hard no matter how you slice it.
    What a coincidence-I have a story of me behind the lap top working from home (when I was supposed to be off I might add) where my little one rolled off the couch I thought I had him so securely on ļŒ. And I too left a job after 8 yrs this very year to be home with my 3 kids. Although it was not my choice, it has become my choice not to return to the workforce. That being said, it has NOT been easy. I still donā€™t know how we are going to make it financially and itā€™s been many months. We have given up A LOT of comforts and some things we thought were necessities just to make ends meet. There are days I just want to “go back to work” to get us back on our feet. Yet, I know that will only give us other problems.
    I do have an answer though. Itā€™s a ā€œComing Home Movementā€ where we would encourage Mothers to leave the workplace and return to the home. I mean a full force campaign from city to city across the country. (We will start in the US and see where that leads us) I know at first the idea sounds so silly right, but then again think of the Womenā€™s Lib movement. Who ever thought bra burning was going to be a hit? The more women I talk to, older, younger, etc. I hear the same thing over and over; yes we do need to come home. We need women home. Not sewing, cooking, cleaning ALL DAY LONG. But taking care of the home and making it the retreat for the family vs. the ‘just flew in the door eat sleep wake do it again’ it has become. Also the neighbor that you can borrow a cup of milk from, the women who can (as Titus 2 states) teach the younger women. , Sorry I donā€™t always talk to the voices.
    I have not put any research in this but if all women came home I have a theory we could end many issues in society.
    We would not have a quarter of the:
    *Homelessness (because there would be plenty of jobs)
    *Out of control children (all ages)
    *Mental disorders (which NOT ALWAYS but many times stress induced)
    *Medical diseases/disorders (because Moms would be home to prepare the majority of the meals, sorry Mickey Dees)
    *Lazy feminine men- I really think this is a direct product of working women. Women are making more money and slowly the men are just not sure where they fit in, and why not, every women in Hollywood is making it clear men are not needed. The media is working hard at De-masculating our men. Take a look at every show on TV. They have a HOT Mom, who works outside of the home, she does not cook, clean or even mother the children, sheā€™s more their best friend as they make fun of Dad for 30 mins every show. Then the Dad is NOT hot, he never intelligent, he is in touch with his feminine side and is controlled by his wife. And why not, sheā€™s HOT and has a job making more money than he, he better mind her or she will leave him.
    But seriously I truly wish I was not the only women home on the block. Wish I had a Titus 2 older women (my Mother passed when I was 18). Wish I knew how to take care of this home, these children, My Man and have a cheerful heart while doing it.
    Anyway thatā€™s just my soap box…. with some ranting mixed in.
    I just wanted to say again WAY TO GO! This hit the spot. It has encouraged me so much and that is saying a lot considering my circumstances. Thanks for being obedient in what you are doing and for being honest with your heart despite the sensitivity of the subject. God will Bless you and YOU are blessing us as you do it.
    ~Angie

  44. 344
    Jean M says:

    Amanda – you are doing a great thing for your family and yourself.

  45. 345
    Jina says:

    Amanda,

    Blessings over this season of life for you and your family. I pray that you are able to give more time for yourself in this season. It is so hard to give on fumes of the Holy Spirit. I thought of Jackson as I read your note and the idea below came to mind. Hope it encourages you!

    I have thought of my kids’ hearts like a bank account. I work at depositing into the relationship tank as much as possible. There are times I have to “withdraw” (my kids are now 9,10,12,13) from that account in a heated discussion or as they are having to submit to my authority when they disagree. Listening and validating before setting boundaries goes such a long way at our house!

    Blessings,
    Jina

  46. 346
    CAROLLIVINFORGOD says:

    Hi Amanda
    You encourage me so much we need to pray about stuff before we make final decisions how many times I have just made the decisions without praying so you encourage me to pray before making the decisions. Enjoy your family you are a sweet mom and you have a very special place here on this blog and in our hearts. Love you bunches and will be praying for you on your trip .
    Have a great weekend
    Carol

  47. 347

    AJ,

    She’s coming. Praise Him she’s coming….

    Marti

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    Sheryl says:

    God bless you, Amanda! I commend you for putting your family first. So many Christian women don’t get the concept of family before ministry. I am 50 (!) now and my daughter often tells me how grateful she was that I was mostly a stay-at-home mom. When she entered third grade, I went back to work as a teacher in her Christian school. Although I was able to have contact with her during the day, it wasn’t the same. I had more “kids” to deal with and was often depleted when I got home. I resigned the summer before my daughter’s senior year of high school, thinking that I had one more year of her at home, and I wanted to make the most of being her mother. I am so grateful for that time. (And my marriage is still great because of that decision too!) Your children will grow so quickly, and you can’t get this precious time back. Make the most of it, and remember that what society says we should be as women is a huge lie!

  49. 349

    Amanda, I appreciate your decision and understand. I think you are making a wise choice for this season of your children’s lives. When my girls were small 10 to 12 years ago, there was not as much technology available. Or if there was, I didn’t have it. And I’m so thankful. I’d spend all day simply being with them, reading to them, teaching them to read, playing games … it seems like today so much robs us of our time with our children. It creeps in … facebook, email, work … and before we know it hours with our children have been taken away. We have to do what it takes to find a healthy balance. Love you!

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    Emmy says:

    Amanda you are so precious! I know that was a hard decision! You have been a blessing to all of us! You are a wonderful wife, Mother, daughter, sister, coworker, blogmaster : ) I adore your heart for the Lord, the way you listen and discern what He has for you and your family. Thank you for always being so transparent. I pray my daughters will grow up and have a heart like yours! : )

    God has so many amazing things prepared for you… I can’t wait to sit back and watch!

    Praying for you now! God Bless- Emmy : )

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