Hey, Girls! You are doing such a fabulous job with your group discussion. I’ve especially loved watching you respond to one another. You really are such a tremendous and unique community of women. I’m honored to journey with you here. Let’s continue hearing from all those who have been active from the beginning but let’s also hear from more of you out there who are watching and reading but haven’t really jumped in here and participated. I promise you that when we wrap this thing up, you will be far more satisfied with the experience if you personally invested in it.
We are reaching the halfway point in our journey and have arrived at a place of utmost importance in our pursuit of wholeness. Your assignment this week is based on only one chapter of the book: CHAPTER 9. As you will soon discover, it is not a chapter you just read. It’s a chapter you actually do. A chapter you actually pray. Please take it seriously. Everything ahead of us hinges on this experience. It is placed at this point in the journey prior to the prescriptive and practical phase of the book so that the way is cleared and our dignity restored enough to move forward. It will help place us in a posture God can bless with the rich kind of confidence He wants for His people and activate the power we have within us to think and FEEL differently. That’s essentially where the remainder of the book heads.
Here are your very simple assignments this week:
1. Do (don’t just read but actually do) Chapter Nine. In your comment to this post, simply reflect back on your time with God and share anything specific that you received from it.
2. Go to last Saturday’s post (3/6/10) and look at all the verses in the comment section. You will find a wellspring! Pick five Scriptures that speak most powerfully to you right now – five that you feel like you need the most – and write them on the inside of the back cover of the book. (This should be a lot less intimidating than what I asked you to write inside the front cover at the beginning of our journey!)
And that’s it for this week! I want the prayer journey to stand by itself and clear the way for mighty works ahead. We have some of our most eye-opening moments in the second half so stay with it, Girls!
Since we only have one chapter this week, this is a great time for many of us to play catch-up!
I am packing this very moment and about to head to Toronto for our first 2010 Living Proof Live. We can’t wait to see a God-show in Canada! Come on, Canadian Sisters! We’ve got plenty of room for you!
I love all of you very much.
Marlys 
I just finished chapter 9. I was truly blessed by my time with the Lord. I have never in all my life read a "pre-written prayer" (and I have read a few that are out there) that hit home like this one did! All I can say is Yes Beth the Lord ordained this prayer for many of us.
What hit home for me the most was that He can forgive me for my relentless pursuit of control and my jealousy and covetousness that feed my insecurity. I am asking Him to delivery me from insecurity in my relationships as that is my number 1 issue in my marriage right now. I now realize how so many of my insecurities fed the things I have done in my marriage. How insecure I was and I didn't even "know" it but I was sabatoging my marriage one insecurity at a time. We are in such a pit because of me but I know God can deliver our marriage. As it was written…Perform a miracle on me, Lord!
Tricia
30's
Married
Arizona
In my quiet time this morning I spent nearly an hour on Chapter 9. I read it aloud and then wrote down my answers on a sheet of paper. I tend to edit and re-edit things like this and didn't want to scratch out entries in my book. (Typical!) It was so moving. I read it, wrote my answers and then re-read it and like many, I cried through it.
In the stillness of that time, I discovered something new that I was afraid of that I never realized…I'm afraid of being forgotten by people I love who are no longer in my life. I truly feel God revealed that to me this morning. It makes sense. A step-father who I haven't seen in nearly 28 years is one of those people.
I also believe God whispered into my ear that I use past wounds as excuses for current fears. It is so time to just let that go.
I'll write my verses down next, in my spiral to revisit over and over. 🙂
So glad we are reaching this point in the study.
Marlys
married
39
Oregon
WOW! Chapter 9 is absolutely awesome. So many times I can't find the right words to say. I was in awe that those ARE the exact words I wanted and needed to say. Oh so a GOD THANG! Thank you for writing those words.
However, I must say, and I'm suspecting it's the enemy…but I feel…maybe I should pray it again. Did it STICK? Surely, it did because I meant it. Maybe I just need to say some Bible verses OUT LOUD and maybe PRAY AGAIN LOUDER and he will leave me alone. "LANDS" (as my dad would say) THAT drives me crazy – the doubting.
O.K. so I'm going to say/write a few verses!
Eph. 6:16 Take up the shield of faith with which you extinguish all the FLAMING ARROWS of the evil one!
Psalm 40:2 & 3
He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the LORD. (ESV)
1 John 5:4 For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world-OUR FAITH! (ESV)
2 Timothy 1:7
for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
Already starting to feel better:o)
just a humorous little sidebar– my car broke down on friday, and i had to have it towed to my mechanic for the weekend. when i got home, i discovered my Insecurity book was not with me. i had to laugh when i realized i had left it –with "INSECURITY" in big bold blazing letters on the cover!–in the front seat of my car which was now in the possession of several men at the shop!! if THAT doesn't make one insecure, i don't know what would?!?! 🙂
i told my friend about it, and her response was…"Hah! Make it real and live out loud! God will even do that for us… since we can't… won't… really don't want to… He loves us THAT MUCH… :)"
isn't THAT the truth?? thank You, Father, for caring about me so very much!
Loving Beth Moore Ministries, I have received in the mail your god anointed book of "So Long Insecurities" I am crying now for i have so longed for such a help in this area for since i was very young, I am just starting to read it,and i know i am behind the study,but will catch up,its just i am savoroing every word and taking my time with the Lord for the deep ,deep healling and deliverence i am in such need of,thank you for the gift,i thought i would never receive such hope in my life,i am broken,do not know who i really am,finding thru him whose i am,growing thru pain,and bless God he is so tender with me and patient,so much depends upon Him for me,my breath,my life,and my hope for a future for good and not for evil….I am also starting college in the Fall,journalism to be exact and with that gift,be able to have columns in said Christain magazines…pray for me please,for I need an extra portion of that latley,,,I also am getting my own place in a few months,and with that i am asking for prayer that i will get to have my little girl,whom I lost over not being able to provide for her for i was homeless for 3 yrs.and the judge gaave custody of 10 yrs to her great grandparents,with also knowing i have an anxiety ptsd disorder and they just did not know how it would effect her,however,her father is a herion addict,and that is why i left the abusive and severe abusive situtaltion,all i did day in and day out is pray,so I took her to a shelter,and the judge decieded that since the great grandparents are extrememly rich,they have her for 10 yrs……they are atheists and my spirit is broken over this,please respond for i am so broken over losing her,and the judge affirmed that there was no neglect,or abuse of any kind on my part,but as said not enough to provide for her,god help me to accept the loss of her,she is only 12 and her name is Julia please pray that i at least get visitation,so much of my insecurites lie within this,I am so lost without her,and all I can see is her on Jesus lap surrendering her into his care and plan,but the grief is so much that at times i can hardly breathe…you may reach me at [email protected] or [email protected] i need someone out there to help me with prayer and divine guidance,please,in Jesus name,Amen,Angels on the Wing….Susie Sterkel xoxoxoxoxoxox
Ellen
20's
Married
Colorado
So this prayer was powerful, as everyone else has discovered! I have a few friends reading the book that are just beginning and I keep telling them wait until you get to chapter 9!!!
This prayer was huge in my life and I'm not sure how it touched me. Does anyone else feel that way? I have felt the biggest stronghold, feeling insecure at work, letting go of its hold on me. I am at work now and I don't dread it like I used to. Not to mention that reminding myself of my dignity, I've been able to come out of my shell more and get to know more of my co-workers.
Beth,
After such a powerful night of biblestuday last night, I came home to an empty house. My man ended up going to the rodeo w/our daughter & her friends. They ended up with an extra ticket last minute. God provided time for me to get alone with him and pour out my heart to Him. He is so good! I awoke this morning feeling 20 pounds lighter! I was carrying around way to much baggage….
DeeDee
40's
married
katy,tx
Hannah
Southwest,OH
18
single
I have been reading ahead in the book and am currently at chapter 13 or 14. I must confess that when I came to chapter 9…I skipped it. In my defense I was watching a friends children at the time(they were in bed) and did not think that would be the best place to complete the chapter. I finally got back to doing it on Monday and morning. Wow.
God is so faithful. The thing I love most about this particular chapter is that I can go back to it as often as I need and and re-read all of those truths. it is so easy to forget the things God says to me in the middle of a struggle, this way I can go back and speak those promises over and over again.
The thing God kept saying to me while I was working through the chapter was that those words aren't just going to stick in my head the first time I read them. I have to be diligent about recognizing insecurity for what it is and not accepting it in my life. I was so blessed by this chapter.(it was also incredibly humbling.)
Love to all my siestas!
Hannah
Beth, you have been an integral part of my spiritual journey. The first study I did of yours I was still angry at God and not sure I wanted Him as my Savior. It took two years of counseling with my pastor, your Bible Studies, and the love of the women in my small group before I could make that decision.
This prayer showed me areas God has already healed and areas that still need work. It took several days to pray because when a line moved me I went deeper in prayer with God.
I stopped and prayed for a long time when I got to the part, "Lord, come and treat my heart and soul where they have been shattered by loss." I gave Him the rest of the things i was holding on to in my life and fervently prayed that God uses all that i have experienced to reach other souls for Him. I pray, after my 40 years in the wilderness of hating him (I've only been saved 8 years), that I don't waste His time and that I do not let insecurity stop me from obedience to Him.
Beth, I am still working out with God that I am not ruined Goods, that what my father did in taking my innocence did not ruin me for life. I sometimes mourn the little girl that never got to be a little girl for I was a sexual object from the age of 8. This study is timely because recently I received more information about my parents, and saw the generational aspect of the abuse I received. I was devastated when I learned my mom permitted my abuse as a way of keeping my father from leaving her for his other girlfriend. I have forgiven them, but there are hurts so deep and words that still aren't erased. God and I still have some work to do. Your book is helping me see those root remnants that need help from My Gardener.
Beth, I pray for you that God continues to bless you in all areas of your life. I know that you have touched the lives of many women. It warmed my heart to see 50 women from various churches gathered to begin this study about the Tabernacle. How you touch lives and hearts! You will have many, many crowns to cast at His feet.
Heather
Shokan, New York
Married
50's
I loved chapter 9 – a great time of sweet prayer time with my Jesus. reflecting on who I am IN HIM and not who the world say I am or who I try to be. I needed that, I just prayed that the Holy Spirit would cover me and renew me. that I wouldn't just send up the prayers but I would really mean it & that I really would let go & let god. I felt a wave of peace rush over me & I can't wait to see what else the Lord is going to do. I love in the prayer where it said a few times, Lord don't stop until you've made a miracle out of me. Amen to that!
Candace
Jefferson City, TN
33yrs
Chapter 9 is still having a huge impact on me. I am going through it slowly, as I get time to myself (which is turning out to be hard with homeschooling 3 young children in the house all the time!) ha!
But, I'm about 2 sections into it so far and could have bought the book just for this chapter. It is amazing to me how almost every word written could have come from my heart. Even more amazing that there are so many women who feel the same as I do…yet we feel so alone?!!? The enemy has surely got a hold on us in making us feel alone!!
My favorite scriptures, though it was hard to pick just 5!!
Deut. 20:4
2 Cor. 12:9
Isaiah 33:6
Prov. 31:25
Isaiah 61:1-4(I'm memorizing this for Breaking Free and it fits perfectly with this book too!!)
THANK YOU Beth for allowing God to use you in such a mighty way. And THANK YOU siestas for sharing your hearts on this blog so that we can know we are not alone in this struggle!! God is faithful!
Shaminder
30's
Married
toronto,ON
Read through chapter 9 & felt it was custom-designed just for me.
The verses in Isaiah 43:10-11 seem to stand out for me.
"You are my witnesses,declares the Lord,and my servant whom I have chosen,so that you may KNOW and BELIEVE ME and UNDERSTAND that I AM HE. Before me no god was formed nor will there be one after me. I, even I, am the LORD, and apart from me there is no savior."
Finally got to "do" chapter 9 last night. The journey so far has been good and I have learned a lot about me. I feel this whole thing working. I have needed this for a long time.
Sandra
41
Knoxville, TN
Single
As I reading the prayer, I cried as I read it, cause I have spent so many years believing the lies. I am sure I will read over chapter 9 again. I loved the part of coming to him as I am. It felt so refreshing and such a release.
In out Thursday morning bible study at church, we are doing Breaking Free, all of this has been what I need. And I am at a place where I need this to break free of the insecurities and see and believe and seek his truths over and over
Stacy,
40's, married
Cincinnati, OH
Shaminder
30's
Married
Toronto,ON
Read & cried through chap 9 and felt it was custom-designed just for me.
The verses in Isaiah 43:10-11 really speak out to me now.
"you are my witnesses, declares the LORD, and my servant whom I have chosen,so that you may KNOW and BELIEVE ME and UNDERSTAND that I AM HE.Before me no god was formed,nor will there be one after me. I, even I, am the LORD, and ARART FROM ME THERE IS NO OTHER SAVIOR."
Thank you Lord, for opening my eyes to your truth.
My prayer time was absolutely precious. DIGNITY! I can't wait to have that in my life!
Jennifer
40's
Married
Colorado
Missy, 36
Married
Tennessee
Thanks to each of you for the outpouring of God's Word which has so encouraged me this week. This specific journey of letting go of insecurity began for me almost two years ago and I sense this book as my exclamation point in the story. I know there will struggles with insecurity all my life, but I am NO LONGER defined by other people – their approval or rejection. Through the prayer I was able to identify areas which I need to continual need to bring to Christ for healing and loving correction in the renewing of my mind. It is so freeing and so challenging all at once.
Thank you, thank you and praise to Him who does what He says.
Missy
I had a hard time with this week – first I wanted to find more than 10 minutes of undistracted time and realized…that's hard! But really if I'm honest – I was hesitating to do the prayer…WHY ON EARTH WOULD I DO THAT?! great question!
I think I knew that by reading the prayer and being serious about this – I would have to change. Change is scary and I'm used to living in my insecure cocoon — how pathetic! Interestingly however, the longer I kept putting it off … the more unsettled my heart kept getting and the more it felt like the book was drawing me to find time (probably not the book but the LORD – lol!)
Anyway – here's what stuck out:
"I'm sick of faking…I desperately need (and want) to be delivered from my chronic insecurity. I AM READY TO DISCOVER WHAT IT MEANS TO BE TRULY SECURE. I don't have to hang my head in defeat and shame."
I was shocked to find that I am feeling guarded in this process – that I am afraid that it's too late (don't know where that came from). And I wrote out that I even if I try, it won't be enough – the thought of failing is more than I can handle.
But then I moved into surrender of my stubborn pride – how I want to hang onto insecurity and anger and create my own mess. I asked God to forgive me of thinking so little of myself, for despising myself and for my unbelief. I also admitted to being often paralyzed because of fear that it won't be great – so I don't move at all.
This is getting too long…ugh…I resonated with wanting to be covered with God's trustworthy hand (and to BELIEVE in his trustworthiness). I desire to be clothed with strength and dignity – transformed.
"The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When evildoers assail me to eat up my flesh, my adversaries and foes, it is they who stumble and fall. Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war arise against me, yet I will be confident." Psalm 27:1-3
Hi Ladies:
After praying the Chapter 9 prayer the other day, I was listening to praise songs on my iPOD and a secular song popped on – and it was so perfect for this study and chapter: "These Are Days" by 10,000 Maniacs. I'm mostly a Christian music kind of a girl, but I just can't resist the joy and hope and celebration in this song.
Yesterday I was standing in the middle of a group of 6-9th graders, listening to my iPOD while waiting for my son to come out of the school building. In the midst of that sweet crowd, These Are Days started to play in my ears. It was all I could do not to sing it out loud right there in the middle of all those kids. The *only* thing that stopped me was knowing my son would be forever humiliated and emotionally scarred by his mother if I did so.
Here are the lyrics (with two little word changes so that it applies to us as we're being set free from insecurity by JESUS, our LIFE):
These Are Days – by 10,000 Maniacs
These are the days
These are days you’ll remember
Never before and [ever] since, I promise
Will the whole world be warm as this
And as you feel it,
You’ll know it’s true
That you are blessed and [chosen]
It’s true that you
Are touched by something
That will grow and bloom in you
These are days that you’ll remember
When May is rushing over you
With desire to be part of the miracles
You see in every hour
You’ll know it’s true
That you are blessed and [chosen]
It’s true that you are touched
By something that will grow and bloom in you
These are days
These are the days you might fill
With laughter until you break
These days you might feel
A shaft of light
Make its way across your face
And when you do
Then you’ll know how it was meant to be
See the signs and know their meaning
It's true
Then you’ll know how it was meant to be
Hear the signs and know they’re speaking
To you, to you!
So sorry to not be participating. I was going to try and do Breaking Free and this at the same time. Can't do it. Breaking free is too intense and takes my full attention which is wonderful. I will catch up starting in April.
Prayed through Chapter Nine yesterday as I sat outside on my patio in chilly sunshine–but at least it was sunshine! The Lord brought some surprising things to mind as I filled in the blanks. I enjoyed that time, as well as scrolling through all those verses and picking my five:
Isaiah 54:4
Hebrews 13: 9b
2 Tim. 1:7
Isaiah 33:6
Daniel 10:19
Marilyn
59, Married
Kirkwood, MO
WOW, WOW, WOW!!! There are no words to describe that AMAZING, emotional, healing prayer! God is sooooo Good. I am very thankful God gave you that powerful prayer Beth and you gave it to us, such a blessing.
As I prepared to do chapter 9, I grabbed my orange UT snuggie my son gave me for Christmas (it was a joke, but I actually love to cuddle in it b/c it makes me think of him) and I snuggled on my knees before the Lord.
Oh my gosh, my biggest mistake, I applied the wrong mascara this morning. I didn't have on my water-proof mascara, Yikes! As I'm crying buckets of tears black mascara is running down my cheeks and onto my cozy orange snuggie. Oh but what sweet healing, emotional, powerful, releasing tears they were for me! I loved every word of that prayer. I especially loved and felt empowered by the words, "Your intent is to make a wonder out of me and show what You can do through me." So I say, "Bring it on Lord, fill me up with your Holy Spirit and do a great work in me! Help other to see Your light shining through me."
Tammy
Springfield, TN
49
Single
Chapter nine was such a blessing to me. I was so convicted during the prayer…I finally realized that I have almost begun liking my dysfunctional upbringing because it has allowed me to have an excuse for my behavior and isolation. I hadn't realized until now that I had been the one to keep myself in this state. Finally I am able to see things in a new light and now I can begin the process of change and healing.
Amber
Colorado
30's Married
Read Chapter 9 aloud and cried quite a bit through it because it was both exactly what I needed to say and exactly what I needed to hear. I have a feeling that current circumstances in my life are going to require me to repeat and repeat!
This first verse spoke to me because Beth says she is certain that God wants us to be secure and bear much fruit in our lives for God. So we are asking for strength to be secure women.
John 15: 7-8 "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, then you will ask for anything you wish, and you shall have it. My Father's Glory is shown by your bearing much fruit; and in this way you become my disciples.
2 Cor 4: 8-9
"We are often troubled, but not crushed; sometimes in doubt, but never in despair; there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend; and though badly hurt at times we are NOT destroyed."
Phil 4:13
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Psalm 18: 32-34
"He is the God who makes me strong, who makes my pathway safe. He makes me sure-footed as a deer. He keeps me safe on the mountains. He trains me for battle, so that I can use the strongest bow."
Kristi from Philly
I wanted you to know that I prayed for you after I read your post. I think you had a wonderful idea about throwing away those razor blades, you don't need them anymore. You already confessed that sin to God and you need to truly believe that you are FORGIVEN and He has FORGOTTEN all about what you did in the past. Continue to seek His face and a relationship with Him. You will be amazed at His never ending love. He loves you,let Him take the place of those blades for you, He IS love. Depression is NOT an easy thing to deal with, I know I have it too and so does my Mom and a lot of people I know, you are not alone. Seek help and keep seeking the LORD and His truth will set you free.
Please read this verse and memorize it and go to it each time you feel low and the blades are calling your name. Jeremaiah Chapter 29 Verse 11,
12,13.
For I know the plans I have for you, DECLARES the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
You can do it, lay it all down at the foot of the cross and meet Him there and ask him into your heart and your life, you won't regret a single moment of time with God.
Blessings,
Andrea – Montana
Wow. Chapter 9 has had a life-changing impact on me, and some of my friends that are also doing the book. God is doing a mighty work! Coming from a backgroud of childhood victimization, the thought of getting my dignity back had never, and I mean NEVER, occured to me. To think that God could, would restore that? It was staggering. And I admit, hard to grasp at first. It was hard to even accept for myself. But though some godly cousel from friends, prayer, and a reading and re-reading of the prayer, I can see it happening. The sentence on page 171, "Where I lost innocence, grant me integrity." That just struck something deep in me, something I'd long since forgot. I could have integrity, dignity. Me. Clothed in strength and dignity. Could it be? Praise God it is! Words cannot express my gratitude for this book and for what is changing in me. Thank you Beth for risking it all and writing it.
Verses:
Ps 27:14 "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."
Jeremiah 32:17 "Ah, Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched are. Nothing is to hard for you."
Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."
Karen
40's
Married
Virginia Beach, VA
Leslie
Late 20's
Married <3
Florida!
I just read through the first 200 or so comments and prayed for many of the siestas who requested it (or didn't). This has been such a wonderful and encouraging community <3
I finally had some quiet time alone last night to read my Chapter 9, and I think amybhill defined in her comment exactly what I was feeling as I read it. As a young girl, I was so riddled by insecurity that by the time I reached womanhood my heart was ripped to shreds. Having my son matured me a lot, but several years ago God brought me together with an amazing group of young women that I think really catapulted me into security. We called ourselves "Virtue in the City" (instead of Sex in the City), and to this day we still refer to "Virtue" often. It was my first taste of real Christian sisterhood and love, and my only regret is that I didn't get to experience it earlier in life. But as I read through the prayer, there were definitely parts of me that are still clinging to unbelief. My confession was that I was afraid my husband would die before he ever knew God's love the way I do. But when I looked at the big picture (Beth you referenced how God DEFINITELY wants us to be rid of insecurity and it's ours for the asking), God wants my husband's heart just as much as I do (even moreso!). I need to just keep remembering that and let it go. God is so much bigger than anything I can fathom, and how much greater is His love for my husband than even what I could muster (and believe me, I'm in this for the long haul…he is God's gift to me, I truly believe it).
Something else God revealed to me this week that I just absolutely loved. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man (woman) of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." I recently shared with a sister that if we truly believe that ALL Scripture is God-breathed, then we know that it is just as relevant today as it ever was. It's a living, breathing piece of knowledge that is to be used for our daily walk. There is nothing you will ever face that cannot be answered in that book. What comfort and solace!! To know that God has fully equipped us with how we can be truly successful in EVERYTHING we do, just by opening His Word!!
He just gets better and better 🙂
I have waited this long to DO Chapter 9, so I could really take it in. I love that prayer and wish that I could memorize it like the Believing God Mantra….but let me just say in my response to "I am so afraid that… I will lose again before I think it's time, my life, my family, my love, my security…my, my, my, my….Yikes….so self absorbed. I had begun to realize this more and more over the past few months and then doing this study, it keeps coming back to that. My self worship and foolish pride drives all the other active sins that I commit on a daily basis. I am really sick of it. BREAK THE CYCLE WITH ME. DO NOT LET LOSS WIN. HELP ME STOP CONFUSING A CHANGE IN MY CIRCUMSTANCES WITH A CHANGE IN MY SECURITY STATUS. PLEASE DON'T LET IT BE SAID THAT I LOVED MYSELF TOO MUCH TO FULLY LOVE ANYBODY ELSE. TRANSFORM WHAT DRIVES ME. QUELL WHAT TRIGGERS ME. On this day, I receive my dignity back; and I MEAN IT!
Kara
34
Aurora, IL
Married
i wish the prayer time had been longer than 30 minutes. Satan has really been testing all my insecurities while reading this book, and that time with the Lord was precious. I was thankful to spend that time with him and talk with him about my issues and my hopes.
OK…so I LOVED part 2 of our assignment this week and MUST post my 5 scriptures!!!!! Our God is so big and awesome and SPEAKS loudly!!!
Deuteronomy 20:4
"For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory."
Isaiah 46:4
"I am He. I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."
2Samuel 22:33
"God is my strength and power, and HE makes my way perfect."
2 Samuel 22:36
"You give me your shield of victory. You stoop down to make my way great."
Galatians 3:3
"Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?"
Versions are NIV and emphasis mine. I have added these verse to my scripture cards….and this week if the first time for to post and I have posted comments TWICE…SO LONG INSECURITY!!!!!!!
Aimee
Married
38
Arkansas
What a blessing and comfort this prayer is! Thank you Beth for being a willing transcriber for our Lord! Reading over the many comments of how poignantly it affected all of us and how personal it was to us all I have NO doubt – none- that this was God-inspired.
I was taught from an early age that crying meant you had lost – lost the argument- lost your dignity – whatever. So it was with real amazement that I found myself with floods of tears throughout this prayer and to find they were cleansing tears, tears of joyful release. I have felt the change in my life since that prayer – felt God's presence in a new and powerful way.
Now to thoroughly mark up my book by inscribing the back of it with five of the Scriptural posts. . .
Lynne, 61 married in Oregon
Cindy
50's
Single
Missouri
Last night starting at 9:15 was a wonderful time in the presence of the Lord. I'll be honest, I also have the 'book on cd' and have been listening while driving…the words weren't hitting me like I hoped. But as I sat surrendered and focused, praying, the Lord showed up and my heart spilled out my eyes! The Lord loves me for who I am and the way He made me…I need to focus on being who He has called me and not what I think will impress others! God forgive me…it's not like I don't know this…been a Christian many years! Praise God His mercies are new every morning!!
Beth, THANK YOU for being such an encourager and cheerleader for us!! I so appreciate how God uses you!!
To Kristi from Philly… whenever I am tempted to cut, a verse which continues to resonate within me is: "by His stripes we are healed." (Isaiah 53:5) Do not let anyone or anything take your God-given dignity. Only His "cuts" offer true healing. I will earnestly pray for you.
I have done chapter nine God is funny all these things have been happen I made a fool out of myself this week reget what i did. I wish I saw that day what I saw the next day I see where i was trigger from . I type up the prayer and wrote some verse on index cards put them all around the house and some in my car and pocketbook when I start feeling insecurity again I can pull them out and as God to help me not to react. I cant not tell you how much I am grateful for this blog and book for the first time in my life I dont feel like some crazy women. I do know I have a long way to go I know I do deserve love and that God loves and my husband I just have to keep telling myself that so the devil doesnt win. I do know that my insane family set off all my insecurity and I have to work hard there.. The hard part is that I am the odd one in the family cause I only have half and step brother and sister and they remmeber all the time and my mother wont tell me who my father is she said that he wouldnt want me anyway..for the first time in my life I feel about of someone and that my husband andGod..I am very bless with my husband he trys very hard not to let my family get to me..He loves my children even though they are not his..I really want to be a good mom I have no romodel to go by and I have alright hurt my children more then ever they are adults now and I really work hard at showing them the lord and she them love I was I could of change things for them And I tell them if it was changed we wouldnt be as close as we are..I want to be the women that God want me to be Why am I so scared of all of this beth could you tell me how to just trust what god wants and not be so scared…
Sharon 40 married
clinton, ny
36
Married
Powder Springs GA
After the prayer time I had with chapter 9, for the first time in my adult life, I feel FREE. Gloriously and completely free. God, in his perfect will, timed this week to fit right along with the week about the Love of God in Breaking Free. Incredible!
Lisa from Madison: Well, I read Chapter 9. I t was so moving. I know I must read it again and again because there is so much to digest. Unfortunately I was interupted so to speak. My husband was trying to get me to come out while he was out with friends at a bar. I stuck to my guns and stayed home trying to finish Ch 9. I know the power of my Savior. I know He is showing me every area of insecurity within me. Its disgusting to look at it all, actually. But there is a reason for everything. He has been asking me to "be consistent." I have much difficulty following thru on things. I make it for a week, a month, a few months, then fail or should I say, give in to my insecurity. Its so familiar…I just want God to be MORE familiar. The one thing I am trying to quit is smoking. I have given up many other things because I know it is NOT Gods will and my worst fear is looking like a hypocrit. It feels awful. Please pray for me. I smoke when the insecurity comes and I need to trust my savior and go to Him instead. I am embarrassed to even share that I am a christian and I smoke. I figured its better to be honest and ask for prayer. Lord carry is addiction, I pray. Thankyou ladies for all your honesty.
I cried my way through. Honest. Part way thru God was gracious to send my husband to help me talk. I struggled with trying to keep the picture of Jesus sitting with me but I really needed, as my daughter says, "someone tall" in the flesh. I needed the encouragement,accountability not to give up or revert back when the book is over. I want to move beyond the insecurities not play with them.
I and my husband,family, church are and have been going thru an hard time and I had so many spiritual attacks trying to keep me from doing Ch9> (and I suspect will come as a follow thru with it) I realized last night in the midst of tears and book, that I'm more insecure than secure. And that starting on a new path will be llike starting relationships, my mind at the begining. I dislike waiting for healing but God did gently show his prescence by His Spirit bringing to mind scripture and I don't know about the next hour but I'm working to believe that HE is faithfull to complete. THat HE DOES have GOOD PLANS for ME!
There were so many places that all I could do was cry and completely agree with Beth in prayer. I do want healing. and I would like the attacks to stop, many of them are in areas where I had totally given up ground to fear and insecurity. I want the strength and dignity that I can barely imagine.
When I finally went to bed I looked over and my Bible and saw Psalm 27:11-14
'Teach me Your way o LORD and lead me in a smooth (level)path..'
I will believe that I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the LIVING.
Leaning on the promises of God, Diane from Ak
30's
I finally had the courage to read Chapter 9! There is something to be said about a beautiful sunny warm day to feel like God is all around you. I was sitting out on my swing and felt Him nudge me to go ahead and read it. I felt Him say, it's O.K. I'm right here with you, you can do it. So I did. My first reaction is WOW! I feel like I was turned inside out. In a good way. I felt like all the ugly truths I've believed for so long were taken captive by God in the moment I spoke the words. I'm sure I will have to re-read it every now and again because I'm flesh and blood and will need reminding of who I am in Christ. But I know without a doubt that God knows I will struggle occasionally and that He will be there right beside me to remind me that He is bigger than anything and that He loves me the way I am because He formed me and He does not make mistakes. I will have to read this prayer again to keep me in my place.
Thank you Lord for giving me the courage to finally read this prayer. Thank you for addressing my fears. Thank you for showing Beth the words to write for You knew what we needed to pray for and confess. Thank You for wrapping your arms around me and making me feel like I am yours, and that I am safe in your love. Thank you for giving me a new identity.
My dear siesta Kristi from Phili-
My heart goes out to you right now. Your honest post was a huge reminder of our Saviors redemption in my own life! Cutting has also been a major coping mechanism and source of release for me. I know what struggle it can bring, the HUGE insecurities that it's trying to hide, but also those it starts itself. I also have MANY scars that I try to hide, at times even lieing to keep from sharing my secret. But there is hope! I'm not at all saying I have it all together (I actually am doing good to even appear together right now) or am never tempted to cut, but through Christ I'm gaining victory! Every day I go without cutting is a victory…because life sure hasn't gotten any easier 🙂 Saying all of that, I would personally encourage you to hand those razors over to a spiritual mentor or counselor (when i've thrown them away in the past it's too easy to just get more). Let them know what is going on…but at the same time you can not make them responsible for you not cutting (I've made that mistake several times and lost dear friends because of it). Have them praying WITH you about the struggle. It's tough, I'm not going to lie, but God can help you beat this! Know that I'm over here in Missouri praying with you on this! You can do this! Freedom is ours!
Kaila
Missouri
Melanie 🙂
Tennessee
29
married
The prayer – wow, amazing. Healing. Restoration. God is so good. His grace…His unfailing love…He is working on my heart and I am just so excited to get past "me" so I can get to HIM fully!
Thank you so much for such a powerful, annointed prayer.
I kept sort of putting this prayer time off. I’m not sure why. Perhaps I didn’t think I was up for it or that it would be too entangling for me to get through. I didn't think I could do another inward journey. Over the years I have looked inward at my present life and my surrounding circumstances. I have looked back at my history to try and figure things out. I have read book after book…had prayer, prayed…I just want to be whole. I want to be done with this. Only God can do that for me. And that’s what I received from this time of prayer. GOD. It was all laid out before Him and placed in His hands. The things that were of my own doing and the things that were not. I know I have a part and I must do what God would have me do…but even the understanding of what that may be and the grace and strength to do it has got to come from Him. Awhile back it occurred to me that I have now lived longer with God in my life than I have lived without Him. The question came: When is that going to make the difference…when is that fact going to tip the scale. I felt it was the Holy Spirit gently nudging me. I know God wants me free. For the Saturday assignment someone entered Gal. 5:1 and it spoke to me again…"It is for freedom Christ has set us free." HAS set us free, not WILL set us free. God is good to me.
Well there is so much that resonated with me in Ch 9 that I don't know where to begin. I have been insecure as long as I can remember. I came from a dysfunctional abusive family and always subconciously thought if my own parents don't like me, who will? I struggled with rejection issues so much growing up & we moved constantly from place to place which made making friends even harder. My mother was the role model of insecurity. She would duck into the nearest store if she saw someone she knew coming towards us at the mall or if someone showed up unexpectedly at our house we would all have to hide & pretend no one was home because she wasn't dressed right or the house wasn't totally clean. As an adult, I still struggle with these things. I thought this was normal behavior. I wonder all the time whether people actually like me & I always second guess what I say to people thinking "why did I say that…that sounded so stupid, etc" Looking at me you would never know that I have these issues. I look like I have it all together & people think because of my outside package that I'm very confident. Even snobby. (I have gotten that one alot!) It's just a huge disguise for my insecurity. The things in Ch 9 that stood out to me were: I cannot make a human in charge of my security without setting them up for failure. I have done this over & over again with my husband & it just doesn't work. He can never reassure me enough times or say exactly what I need to hear. Although he tries! Poor guy!! I definitely identified with the pendulum swinging between feeling inferior and self conscious and other times feeling like I'm better than others & superior. Please Lord break the cycle with me! I don't want my daughter to struggle with the same feelings of insecurity that I have. I don't want to pass them on to her. I want to be a woman that little girls can follow to dignity & security!
Sandy
35
Married
PA
"You have been with me every moment, even when I felt there was no one to take care of me." (p 170)
God is my Sovereign; He will accomplish His purpose for me; nothing happens by chance or accident; He is all about His glory and my holiness.
What a time of repentance, of re commitment to what I already know, and enjoying His mercy, His love, His grace and forgiveness.
So looking forward to April 24
love y'all
Beverly
Stayton OR
married
52 years old
WOW!!! Just did Chapter 9!!! Powerful and amazing!!! I am going to have to pray it again and again…the prayer just soothed my soul.
Heather
38
Married
Little Rock, Arkansas
I just got done praying through Ch 9 and so many things hit home with me. I have been struggling with a chronic illness that leaves me pretty much disabled and unable to care for my kids. I can't drive or go run errands or help at my kids school or any of the things I used to. It has been several years of this with the last year being the most debilitating. I have struggled with feeling worthless and that my life doesn't have value. I have been struggling to trust God through this and some of this prayer struck a chord with me. First I have been in control of my life as long as I can remember and part of the prayer was just relinquishing control to God. That is huge for me. I have been fighting for control this past year so hard & no matter how much I worry or get anxious about my illness, I can't change a thing. Another thing that struck me was the jealousy & covetousness thing. I am SO jealous of other moms who are out playing with their kids and driving them to sports practice and out shopping with them. I have almost become bitter at times about where I'm at in life. I know this is so unhealthy. Deliver me from self pity. I am so fixated on what I don't have that I don't see what I do have. Healthy kids, loving supportive husband, supportive family & friends. I am alive & can see my kids grow. I know others who have not had that luxury! I know God is using this illness provoke change in me. God knew what He was doing when He formed me in my mother's womb & knew that I would have to deal with this obstacle. Nothing is without purpose. Flood my life with your purpose and be my strength in my weakness. Forgive me for my unbelief and let me BELIEVE you.
Please pray for me fellow siestas as I struggle through this. I feel like I have so much to offer in life & what good can be coming from sitting on the sofa all day? But God will heal me in His time & I pray for the patience to wait. The enemy is attacking me everyday with feelings of self pity, bitterness, loneliness and depression. Please pray for strength and peace while I wait.
Rochester, MN
40's
I thank God for His inspiration of that prayer, and the power of the Holy Spirit at work through speaking each word out loud! God has promised to transform us because of His unfailing love. Yeah, Lord!
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25
It was relieving and healing to talk directly with God about my sins and insecurities through the prayer in Chapter 9. I could and still can feel a more secure foundation in God developing within me. Praise the Lord!
Suzanne
20's
Single, In a Relationship
Knoxville, TN
Janet
Lenoir, NC
30's
The healing has commenced! I was very unsure of myself at the beginning of the prayer…I was not certain I could do this RIGHT…but by the end the tears were flowing and the release came. I was so amazed…thank you for believing in us, Beth! God HAS cleared the path to healing for me and revealed so much to me in that short but heartfelt moment.
P.S. I just had to pick this verse from the many I read…it's just too cool!
Deuteronomy 2:3
"You have circled this mountain long enough; Now turn north."
(Ain't it the truth??!!)
So sorry I have been unable to leave a post since Week One! God gifted me through my youngest daughter, who gave birth to my fourth grandchild, Violet Sophia! Praise God all is well with them!
Chapter 7 was a tough read. Came face to face with my own foolish behavior patterns resulting from insecurity.
So thankful for a book that did not stop with identifying a problem.
I prayed through Chapter 9's prayer today, meaning what I said and thanking God for the words that seemed to have been written with my name on them. Only God would know what needed to be written. Praise You, God.
I am thankful to be here right now on this first day of my SECURE life, after thirty-something years of believing the enemy's lies brought about through a childhood experience, and then a cycle of pit-dwelling. Excuses, blame, pride, perfectionism, control, guilt, shame.
Psalm 139 is my lifeline since age 13. I love Psalm 27:1-3, God is my stronghold.
He is my inheritance and oh so thankful to be the daughter of THE KING! Praise You God!
Debra
50's
Married
Colfax, CA
Chapter Nine was a facedown, snot slinging, ugly cry sort of prayer for me. Been doing this book in the midst of seeing a generational healing counselor and in our last session she saw me "wrapped in a warm blanket." How's that for security! Now when I'm feeling insecure, afraid or frustrated I think of the blanket (the STRENGTH and DIGNITY) God placed on me. Then, if necessary, I hurry to my giant spiral from March 6!! 🙂
Thanks be to God for the siestas and our sweet Siesta Mama. Most heartfelt gratitude to our One and Only. All honor and glory to You.