I’ve Rejected Not One

I just spent the past ten weeks immersed in a group of high school girls as we studied the book, So Long, Insecurity together. It was a really sweet (and slightly exhausting, in the best way possible) ten weeks. Among other issues, I bet you could take one guess into a major theme we discussed week in and week out. Dating. Are you shocked? If you are, you might need to get some young girls around you for an hour so you can hear it for yourself. The topic of boys is a popular one. It will get any girl talking. In fact, we spent one entire week hearing all about boys from one wiser, older man and the girls were on pins and needles the entire hour and a half.

To lead a small group and to get girls talking means being authentic and sharing your own struggles and hurts, so inevitably, the girls asked me every question in the book about dating and wanted to hear all about my love life.

Questions like, Are you dating anyone? and Are there any prospective guys in your life? swirled around. While part of me would have loved to have testified about the amazing man the Lord had provided for me, I answered with a simple, Nope!

Because we were all getting to know each other and because they assumed I lived a chick flick kind of love life, I went ahead and told them a bit of my story which included that I’d never “officially” dated anybody nor had I ever had a boyfriend. To be honest, they are always slack-jawed. At 14, you still believe you’ll meet the man of your dreams in college, have 2.5 children and live in a house with a white picket fence, so to meet someone with a different story is slightly shocking.

More often than not, I’m able to encourage the girls when they think their life has gone to shreds because they either don’t have a boyfriend, or they’ve just been broken up with. I never want to dismiss their feelings, but I also want them to know that life is so much more than the boy next door. Plus, the fact that I’m living, breathing and thriving in life gives them a peace that they too will be okay even if it stinks at that moment. And that in all circumstances, God is still good, not because of what He does, but because of who He is. If that’s not a testimony for teenage girls, I’m not sure what is.

One interesting question that arose was, Is your lack of relationship/no boyfriend due to choice or due to just never feeling like it was’time? (They assumed it was due to a choice.) In other words, had I rejected a lot?

Have I rejected a lot? I’ve rejected none.

Let me just say that if I stopped right there, and took a good look at my dating circumstances, I could get so depressed. What girl doesn’t want to be pursued? Asked on a date? Taken to a fancy restaurant? Hugged (or kissed, yes kissed) goodnight? It’s every girls dream to be swept away by her prince charming. Every. Single. Girl. Whether they admit it or not.

Let me also set the record straight that I’m not against dating whatsoever. I didn’t make some rule for myself when I was 10 that I wouldn’t date until I was 27. Nor did I make a rule that I wouldn’t date anybody except my husband. It’s just turned out that way. When people ask if I’ve ever been interested in anybody, I want to laugh. If you’ve been around me more than one hour, you probably know I’ve had multiple crushes at multiple times. I’m a girl. I like boys. Enough said.

However, the truth of the matter is, it just hasn’t happened for me. Am I depressed about that? Well, no. Yes, I’m sure the Lord’s holding a bottle of boy cried tears, and lonely tears here and there, but it doesn’t keep me down and out in the mornings. Do I know why it hasn’t happened? If I did, I could maybe tell you why the sky was blue, too.

What’s more clear to me now more than ever is that the Lord, for a reason only He knows, has guarded my heart and emotions from any romantic relationship. From my perspective, they’re just not interested in me. (That was really weird for me to type, but let me help you understand a little further why I say that.)

For instance, in the past year or so about three different people have tried to set me up with one of their single friends. Listen, I’m not against blind dates, nor am I against being set up. It’s been people that I trust and know and they know me, so why not? I’ve learned that sometimes your friends know more what you need than you do. Most times I knew information had been exchanged, as I would wait for that potentially awkward phone call and two times, the set-ups even landed me a date. But what came of it? Nothing.

If I said I wasn’t a little disappointed after that I’d be lying. Of course I was a tad upset, I’m human and I’m a girl. But it didn’t break me. The last thing I want to do is run some guy ragged myself just so he’ll ask me on a date. No ma’am.

Do you see the pattern? They’re just not interested.

I don’t tell you this to gain any sympathy or to even have a pity party. I’m so over pity parties. (Until my next one creeps up on me!) What I do want you to know is that those boys not pursuing me is not a reflection of me whatsoever. It’s not because I’m fat, or ugly, or don’t dress cute enough, or am not outgoing enough, or am not godly enough, or whatever reason we girls can come up with. I truly believe it is the Lord protecting my heart.

Although it could be easily labeled as rejection, it’s simply the Lord’s protection. At least that’s how I’ve seen it.

I don’t know why He’s chosen to protect my heart for so long. I do know that it’s His grace in my life. I do know He alone has spared me from many broken hearts. I do know that He is building in me something beautiful. I do know that He is sanctifying me through and through and molding me into the woman I am to be one day to my future husband. However future that may be. I do know that marriage is a legitimate desire of my heart that I believe He’s placed there and that He will be faithful.

I might not be able to testify to the girls about the amazing man the Lord had blessed me with, but I am able to testify about His faithfulness despite my circumstances. He is good.

I know that I have rejected not one date, nor has the Lord ever rejected my heart, my desires, or me. And He won’t reject yours, either.


218 Responses to “I’ve Rejected Not One”

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  1. 151
    Melinda says:

    Love this post:) Precious that you are a real life example of gorgeous abundant living for those girlies. Mr. Wonderful better get ready because he is going to be blown away by beautiful you!

  2. 152
    Andi says:

    Wow,Lindsee, thank you for sharing that. I am nearing 40, and have only had one boyfriend that last more than 3 months. I hadn’t been asked out a date in almost 10 years. Then, last February, my neighbor asked me out, and stood me up. I always assumed when I was younger that I would marry and have kids. It’s the reason I never pursued college, or a real career or bothered to find the one thing that I was passionate about and wanted to do with my life. I figured it wasn’t necessary.

    Now, as I near 40, I look back with a bit of regret. I wish I had done those things. And I wonder constantly what it is that is wrong with me that no one is even interested. No guy ever even glances at me. I’ve been convinced for many years that it’s because of my what I weigh.

    In recent years, God has brought me to acceptance of my singleness. I am happy with this life, and enjoying the freedom I have. Though I admit I still struggle with wondering why no guys are ever even interested in me. I wish just one time a guy would express interest. It’s a struggle that God is walking me through one day at a time. This was a great message for me. Thank you for sharing it.

  3. 153
    Laura J says:

    I needed to read this. Thanks for sharing your heart!

  4. 154
    anonymous says:

    Hi Lindsee,
    You said one of the reasons can’t be because you’re not fat. I say with heartache…I am both fat and single. I am working hard to deal with the issues that cause me to overeat. I pray I haven’t missed out on the man God may have for me because of my own failure. I so want to fulfill His purpose for my life be it single or married…

    • 154.1
      Lindsee says:

      Don’t believe that lie, Sister. You are of great worth! Saying a prayer for you right now. You are loved.

    • 154.2
      Elise says:

      Dear anonymous,
      You represent so many of us! God is on your side. he is taking me thru a process of healing…spiritual, emotional, and physical. His word, counseling, 12-step programs (like overeaters anonymous) are life savers. Don’t give up!

  5. 155
    bettie says:

    great post.. but who wrote this? i am confused.. ! thanks

    • 155.1
      Lindsee says:

      Hi Bettie, I, Lindsee, wrote this. If you look directly under the post title, it says who the author is. Hope that helps! Blessings!

  6. 156

    Lindsee, I just love your heart. Thanks for sharing!

  7. 157
    Bailey says:

    God is good. Thanks for sharing your story. I am a 19 year old college junior–never dated, never been kissed, never been swept away. I thought college was where the magic would happen. Instead, I have felt the embrace of a God when I wasn’t lovable and I have been swept away into the depth of Christ’s love. So no magic for this single girl, but lots of God’s love and grace. Thanks for encouraging my heart today!

  8. 158
    Zara says:

    Lindsee!!! I KNEW you were familiar when I met you at the Deuteronomy study!!! I read your post along these lines last year(ish?) on your blog! I just couldn’t place it. Hahah! I have also never dated anyone (despite having crushes every 30 minutes or so) and am knocking on 26. No one can ever believe that girls like me (us) exist, and/or that we’re not complete psychopaths. I’m glad to know we’re out here, and it’s nice to know that we can be such an encouragement our little sisters. I bug God about ‘my future husband’ so often, but I trust His judgement and timing WAY more than I trust my own. And I probably wouldn’t be teaching overseas right now if I’d found ‘the one’ in college and had those 2.5 kids by now. Life is neat and God is good!

  9. 159
    Nancy Cheatham says:

    I’m a long time siesta, but my first time to comment………thank you so much for this honest and thoughtful post. As a mom to a beautiful 15 year old, who wonders why no boys are interested in her, this is a beautiful message to share with her.

  10. 160
    Chris DelMoro says:

    I want to share this with Beth, not sure of how to do it, so…
    this is a blog entry from a friend of mine, Trena She has given me permission to share this.

    Monday, August 6, 2012 Princesses fall.
    My girl, my princess, messed up yesterday. It was a blatant disregard for what we had told her. She just decided she was the boss, and therefore, would do whatever it was she wanted to do.

    I can relate to this mentality just a little too well.

    Straight to her room, and straight to bed was the consequence for that action. It broke her heart. She tried to negotiate the terms of the punishment. She tried to swap another punishment for that one. She begged. She pleaded. She cried.

    Not long after she was in her room, I started receiving messages coming from under the door. Her brother, the messenger, was delivering torn pieces of paper with eight year old handwriting. It was ripping my heart out.

    “I’m sorry. Please love me.”

    It was breaking my heart because the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree on this one. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve prayed that prayer. It is so hard to feel loved when you are all covered in dirt and grime from your fall.

    We told her that we will always love her no matter what, but I felt like she needed to hear more.

    Luckily, I remember a book that Emily’s Aunt Vanda gave her. It was just the thing we both needed to hear. Mike and I sat on her bed with her, and he read one of my favorite books.

    My Child, My Princess by Beth Moore is a parable. It’s about a princess who doesn’t want to be a princess any longer. She starts to act like all the peasant children, and before long, she is “just like them”. She is dirty like them, she is talking like them, and she is with them when they disrespect the King, her daddy. When she sees her daddy get hurt, she wants to go back home to the palace, but she is too ashamed to knock on that door.

    The princess does go home, as ashamed as she was, and The King wipes her face.

    It’s a beautiful little story, and it touches me every time I hear it. It’s my story, and it’s my Emily’s story, and it’s all of our story.

    My girl messed up, and she was pretty ashamed of the way she acted. We all mess up. Don’t let your shame keep you from coming home.

    Our Father is The King of Kings. We have to quit acting like peasants.

  11. 161
    Sara says:

    Beautiful post, Lindsee! I am 28 and say amen and amen to your story and what God has been teaching you! As I teach Sunday school for middle school girls, thank you for the the reminder to continue to teach them to wait on God’s timing.

    There is such a tender sweetness that God longs to lavish on us in the lonely places. Singleness beyond college (especially when you honestly thought you would be married by now) is certainly a sharpening and refining season.

    I am so encouraged that I am not alone in choosing to trust Him and find Him faithful! He is so faithful to us in this season, and will be in the ones to follow!

  12. 162
    Kristy says:

    Wow, I found myself wanting to ask God…Why didn’t you save my heart?!?! Such a sweet sweet story. I love it and can’t wait to hear when God leads the right man into your life. From someone who has been with my husband since I was 18 and just had our 12th Anniversary yesterday I know first hand that even marraige has it’s lonely times. What a blessing this was for me today.

  13. 163
    Christy says:

    Even though I’ve been happily married for 13 years, I found myself relating with you since I hadn’t ever had a boyfriend either before I suddenly and rather providentially fell in love and married. These are wise words and I affirm what you have written. Very wise. Not many have this wisdom and I pray that many, many, beautiful women hear this message.

  14. 164
    LA says:

    Oh gosh – I so needed to read this today. I thought I would have the husband/family thing by now and it’s not in God’s path for right now. I loved your perspective on how God is protecting your heart! I’ve never thought of it that way and it has brought much encouragement into my day! Thanks!!!

  15. 165
    Sally says:

    Thank you Lindsee for being courageously vulnerable! I married when I was 32, and remember wondering a lot in my 20’s why I hadn’t met Mr. Right yet. Your blog would have helped me then, and I am sure it is ministering to loads of women now. As it is, I have been happily married now for 22 years to my best friend. He was so worth the wait!

  16. 166
    Anne says:

    Thanks for sharing your heart, Lindsee. You’re right on. Praise God he is protecting your heart! I can testify to what a blessing that is. I hadn’t ever been on one date until I met my husband a few years post-college. I was in your shoes, but I can tell you my husband was wonderfully worth the wait!

    His plan is perfect. Stay the course. 🙂

  17. 167

    Lindsee, I know you are right. Your attentions are focused on Him right now. He will bring about His perfect timing and plan for you as you follow Him with your whole self. Blessings to you today Lindsee.

  18. 168
    Kathy B says:

    Dear girl, what a precious message you shared. You are certainly wise beyond your years. May the Lord richly bless you for sharing what I’ve rarely heard anyone risk: the depths and lengths of their dating life…while still in the throes of it, as opposed to later when it all makes such perfect sense. I can hardly wait to get my early twenties daughters and teenage SS class to get on here to read this. Such freedom and peace oozes from your words. And such authenticity rings from speaking while right in the middle of your circumstances.
    May your courage continue to be contagious!

    • 168.1
      Lindsee says:

      Kathy, thank you for your sweet words. Sometimes we need to hear from someone in the thick of it, don’t we? I know it encourages me! Blessings to you today.

  19. 169
    Chrissie says:

    This is so encouraging to me. This is a completely new thought that I will carry with me until that first true love comes along. I have dated maybe a handful of times in my 27 years. I don’t struggle with self image for it, but I don’t always understand it either. But I get up, and I get moving, and I know something will come of it. Love and a family is such a strong desire of mine that I know the Lord won’t forget me, but until then….

  20. 170
    Lauren says:

    Wow, Lindsee, you are SO mature. I am 27 and have had a lot of boyfriends, and you are lucky to have no broken hearts and that the Lord has protected you. You are a huge testimony and I know that the Lord has been working on you and your precious heart. Whoever gets you someday will be extremely lucky. You will have no heart breaks or a loss of your virginity, but your heart and body and soul will be solely for your future husband. To me, you stand out and are radiant. That, my dear, is beautiful.

    Your sister in Christ,

  21. 171
    Poorna Diaz says:

    Lindsee – I think we could be friends. You literally took the words out of my heart and put them on paper. Thank you. From one 27-year-old (also having never “officially” dated) to another…God sees our faithfulness to keep trusting and praising Him, even when he withholds some of our desires. And He WILL reward it. As our Siesta Mama says in the James study, session 7 video….Hosea 6:3…as surely as the sun rises, our rain is coming. Sending hugs to you from DC, sister!


  22. 172
    shayne says:

    Lindsee – love your heart.

  23. 173
    Naomi Van Winkle says:

    Lindsee… thanks sooo much. I needed to read this today. I’m a 29 year old single mom. and I just don’t want my focus anymore to be on falling in love and getting married and having a basket of babies and a house and more baskets of babies… I want my focus to be on the Lord and what he has for me today. This very day he has a plan for me. It’s ok to want these things. I guess every girl does and God puts that desire there… but I HAVE to trust his timing. Anything else would be settling! Stay strong girl and keep spreading that truth to other single girls… It might be a little exhausting but we all need to hear it! Naomi

  24. 174
    Rinday says:

    Thank you for this blog!!! I am a 33 year old Christian women who is also single and waiting on the man that God has planned for me. It was so nice to read this and it spoke to me so much in all those areas that the enemy tries to tell me lies about myself and my singleness! I just need to think of it as His protection of my heart. I recently had a best friend, a dear person in my life “break up” with me and end our friendship and that has been hard enough on me..can’t imagine a worse thing… Anyway, thank you;)

  25. 175
    Lisa says:

    Precious Lindsee,

    You have my admiration. I once heard Elizabeth Elliot say that ‘singleness’ is a gift from God, even if it is the one gift that no one seems to want. I was tempted years ago to reply, “Liz, easy for you to say, the Lord has blessed you with two husbands who are now deceased and a third that is still very much alive and well.” Her point being though, it’s all about attitude and seeing spiritually.

    Perhaps I can add a little more insight into what you are referring to as a lack of ‘interest’ by some men towards women such as yourself. I promise that I am not about to bash the men folk here, as women today in my opinion are as much to blame, but it has been my observation that the state of “true manhood” is and has been in crisis for a while now. It is disturbing how “passive” a lot of men have become, especially when it comes to God appointed leadership roles. Lindsee, you are to be greatly commended for your integrity, and not desparately taking matters into your own hands as you remain in your rightful place of being the one who is to be pursued. PTL that you know who your are in Christ and are finding your security in Him. You are worthy of only His very best!

    All blessings,

  26. 176
    Molly says:

    Such truth in these words! I’m turning 25 in a month, and also single. I echo your words of God has protected my heart. I’ve had some opportunities with some wonderful guys that could have led to a relationship, but because God knew better, He didn’t allow it to progress past the friendship stage. How THANKFUL I am for that! God has been reassuring me lately that HE is in control and knows what He is doing, and that when the time is right, HE will bring the RIGHT man! For now, I’m so content to just rest in Him. Thank you for your post, it was very encouraging!

  27. 177
    Laura Holt says:

    Thank you so much for sharing your story and having the courage to be honest!It is so important to remember at every stage in life that God is faithful and good even when our circumstances do no reflect what we want. God will reward you for your heart and honesty!

  28. 178
    Stephanie says:

    OMGoodness…how powerful, profound, comforting and encouraging…and honestly, it brought on a much needed sort of breathe deep and relax moment. I am 34…turning 35 soon and NEVER have I gotten the muchly desired request for a date…I’ve never even had a boy look twice at me. (I know they aren’t looking twice becasue I look many more times than twice to see if they might possibly look back at me…ugh!) I have to agree that I believe that the LORD is protecting me. I am a very loving and caring person and with friendships I find that I am “all in” with my whole heart from the very beginning. I know that if I were asked on a date or had a boy even appear to be interested, there is no doubt I would have fallen head over heels in love (or something worse like lust) over him…and I would be crushed and an emotional train wreck had I been dumped or rejected in any other way. I thank God for His protection…He knows my heart…He knows the way I love freely and He knows how much my heart aches when rejection appears. For that protection I am thankful…but as birthday 35 comes running toward me I can’t help but wonder if love will ever happen. I have prayed COUNTLESS times telling God just how much I would enjoy being a wife…that I would be so sweet and love creatively…leaving cute little “I love you’s” in his briefcase or sweet, random texts for no reason…but God still resists to provide what I think I need. I LONG to be a wife…to create a “honey-do” list…and trust me, I have even told God that I wouldn’t make it too hard for my hubby…I see the couples in my life sitting together at church…holding hands, praying together, taking the Lord’s supper together and honestly, feel a LOT sad…because I still sit alone. I have to choose…often…to thank GOD for His plan…His protection and His (hopefully and eventual) provision…but it isn’t easy. I don’t know if it will ever get easy. I have peace…I am thankful for peace…but the longing in my heart persists. I thank God for the many lessons on persistance and pray that it works in my favor. Thank you for sharing your “life lesson” about being single. I appreciate your honest approach and can say that I totally, truly “feel ya sister”! Thank you for sharing! Bless you!

  29. 179
    Peggy says:

    I so needed to read your post. Thank you for stating what I am, too, experiencing. I am 58 years old and have been divorced for 12 years. My story is in the So Long Insecurity book. It doesn’t matter which story . . . but I agree with what you have so wisely stated. I have not rejected anybody either. I have very little opportunity to meet new people. God is guarding our hearts and if we have the desire in our hearts, then God gave us that desire. At my age, I get even more insecure wondering if . . . nevermind. I have to trust God. I need to get closer to Him. I need to pray more. I just have this deep down nagging thing in my head — what if the answer is really no? but I know that is not from God. God bless you.

  30. 180
    Bonnie Palma says:

    Very well said Ms. Lindsee. Thanks for sharing on such an important subject. You are an inspiration to younger girls by your steadfast trust in God for His best. (from a grandma)

  31. 181
    Kelly Jo says:

    That was beautiful! I thought I was the only one!!

  32. 182
    Beth Herring says:

    Lindsee – thank you so much for posting this and sharing your heart with us all. i just took this into my 26 year old daughter, Melissa, to read. She just happens to be home for a few weeks from Boston where she attends grad school at BU. She needed this so badly and as she read it, she looked up at me and said, “Did I write this??” – it was like her life story. Thank you for the encouragement that you gave to her through this post.

  33. 183
    Karen says:

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I am the girl
    who never had a boyfriend, yet I was surrounded by guys.
    They all saw me as their sister, and I loved it. I was protected, just as you are. When I finally met my best friend and he eventually became my husband, it took us
    six years to figure it out! Now we have been married 21 yrs. God knows what He is up to. Thank you for your words here. Be encouraged! God loves you. Many will be inspired by you. thank you!

  34. 184
    Denise says:

    It’s so wonderful that you are ministering to others to share your story. It’s one that so many young girls need to hear. I agree that God is protecting your heart, and I believe He wants your testimony shared to help other girls/women who may be discouraged because they do not have a special man in their life. Praying for you.

  35. 185
    Kim B. says:


  36. 186
    Tanya says:


    Well done post. Resonated. But for me I’m just now starting to trust God with dating. HA! After having my heart smashed a few times guess I decided God’s little voice of direction in my spirit might be worth pursuing. Instead of begging some guy who was not meant for me to pursue me. Here all along the Lord has been pursuing and I’ve been running (afraid of–what now?? But each one has her own story.)

    Keep waiting. I’m waiting with ya there. Don’t know how long the Lord has for me to wait…but I know that when I know I’ll know and until then I’m waiting! 🙂


  37. 187
    Pam says:

    This is such a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing this. I have 5 daughters and plan to have all of them read this along with my Sunday school class of 9-12th grade girls. God is most definitely protecting your heart. Something I always tell our girls is they are a prize whomever/whatever God has for them is going to be very special just as they are special in His eyes.

  38. 188
    Ashley says:

    Lindsee- Thank you so much for sharing your heart on this issue. I am 32 and have not only never really “dated” anyone but haven’t even really come close. It is a hard thing to understand when all my growing up years I just knew I was going to get married right out of high school and have lots of kids. Obviously it didn’t happen and there are a lot of days when I struggle with my situation but most days I am content where I am in my life and try to embrace the freedoms that I have that my married friends don’t. My mom has always told me that she thought the reason why no one was ever interested was because God was protecting my heart. I always loved to hear her say that because even though I may not understand His timing, believing that helps me get through my confusion. Regardless of me understanding, He still has a plan and one day I’ll count myself blessed to tell my future husband that I not only saved myself physically for him but emotionally too. Thanks again for the encouragement!!

  39. 189
    Rachael says:

    Lindsee, a friend of mine shared this blog with me a few weeks ago and I hadn’t read it until now. I feel as though you just told my story. It was certainly a much needed encouragement and reminder that, yes, although I might have my sad, pity party moments that the Lord is still in control and has an awesome plan for me! God is so good!

  40. 190
    Kimberley says:

    Thank you for this post! I know this will resonate with many women. I am married (11 years) and, while there weren’t a lot of guys, I did have my chance to (politely) reject a few. I actually have a tougher time with female friends. I have no idea why. I am friendly, outgoing, kind, funny–all the normal things that other women are who have lots of friends. I do have a few close friendships but they took a long time to develop. Of course they mean the world to me. I have often wondered why it is that I feel on the outside so often. For example, I go to a retreat with women and I feel like I may have connected with one or two only to have my calls or texts largely ignored (even if it is done in a polite way). None of my close friends are at my church (of 8 years) even though I have made many attempts. Sometimes I struggle with feeling that my friendship is worthless even though I know exactly who is sending those thoughts! I wonder if there are women who have had experiences like me as it seems there are lots of women who have resonated with your story (which I am going to share with my stunningly gorgeous friend magnet single sister).

  41. 191
    jhann says:

    That was well written and I think will be encouraging for all women any ages.
    Your important does not come from having a man in your life. I’ve learned from friends how hard marriage is.
    i am in my late 40s now , never married. I do not miss it nor feel left out.
    It would be nice to have a partner, but I see and agree that there is a reason God has guarded my heart.
    I’ve been in some relationship that have been heart shattering. Not with christian men.

    But now see the lessons i had to learn and thank God they did not lead to marriage. God was guarding me building my foundation to learn what to expect from a Godly man.

    If he see fit to have one come into my life Now…i’d cherish it and know it was right from learning all my life lessons..but i had to go through those hardships to learn.

    I grew up without a father in my life, and with a mother who was too depressed to appreciate two beautiful daughters she was blessed with .

    My sister and I struggled with insecurity but though it all i can see how God protected us.
    We both grew up determined, with sports and school both graduated university.
    Insecurity is hard, but keep challenging it, the lessons are hard but God will provide.

  42. 192
    Susan says:

    This post meant a lot to me. I am the mother of an only child–a son. I’ve been praying diligently for the Lord to send him a Godly woman, but so far she hasn’t show up—yet! My son sounds a lot like you, except he was in a very serious relationship for an extended period that didn’t work out, and has dating off and on since–mainly not dating. Your post made me realize maybe He is protecting my son’s heart until he sends ‘the one’ He has prepared for him.

    Be blessed!

  43. 193
    CJ says:

    You described me in that post too, but it took me until age 28 to get to that point. It is always encouraging to hear of someone else “in the same boat”. Thank you.

  44. 194
    Mary says:

    I just saw this and e-mailed it to my 23 year old daughter who is struggling with this right now as all her best friends are getting married and/or engaged and she has yet to have an official “date”. She e-mailed me back and said that was AMAZING. Made me cry, but AMAZING. Thank you for being real and sharing your heart.

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    Shelly Elston says:

    Dear Lindsee,

    I just read this post and was so moved by your words. You are so eloquent and completely faithful to God’s timing. I believe He will bless you richly. Keep on being your beautiful self. Your presence on this blog is an encouragement to so many.



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    Leslie Maddox says:

    I know what you mean because I had a very similar experience. For me, I had a couple of bad relationships before I left the choosing up to God. In my thirties, I did eventually meet my husband in a way I wouldn’t have predicted years earlier. It wasn’t “spiritual”, we didn’t meet on a mission trip or doing ministry or any of that, but it was most definitely God. Here’s how I sum up my life so far: “Old maid becomes wife and mother.” That pretty much describes how I felt about myself and what God has done for me.

  47. 197
    Tiffany says:

    Amazing, and much needed, blog entry!! While I am married (just 3 1/2 weeks into it!), I have a similar story. I did date a bit in my younger days, when I was not walking very strong with my Lord. But as I hit my mid 20’s, I went through a streak of 5 years without any real interest in any man and did not go on a date. Shocking, I know, in today’s world! Many friends felt sorry for me (gee, thanks ya’ll) and to be honest with you if I’d had my way, I would have been married by then, well on my way to having a large family.
    But I had promised God I would wait for HIS man and He had promised me He would bring him along when we were both ready (there were plenty of times I thought I was ready darn it all, but I was content waiting on God).
    To make a long story short, I met my now husband a few days before turning 29, I turned 30 almost 2 months ago and married the man of my dreams and so much more almost 1 month ago. Its a love story only Christ alone could have written. Had I done the whole dating thing my way, who knows where I would be. I could have done what my friends and family advised me to do and “get out there, meet lots of guys and date the good ones until you find your future husband” (and who cares if they’re really sold out for Christ. you can change that). But I thank my Lord everyday for holding me to my promise and for following through on His.
    We girls really are more than our relationship status tells us we are. Single, dating, married or divorced, our identity is in Christ alone and no man can take that away…nor can he give it to you.

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    Sarah says:

    Wow, this post really spoke to me! When I became a Christian I was 26 years old and I was so done with the dating game. I saw a good friend of mine get her heart broken because she fell in love with someone who ended up marrying another (they were just friends). At that moment I realized that I didn’t want my heart to belong to me – I wanted it to belong to Jesus. SURRENDER. So I prayed to my Heavenly Father for Him to take my heart and keep it for Himself. I prayed that if and only if it was His Will that I get married that He would allow my heart to be open to this man. My Lord answered this prayer so mightily! I was at peace that even if I never got married, God was in control and I could trust Him to provide for me as a single woman. When I was 29, God brought a wonderful man into my life – we courted and were married a short time later. We have now been married over 3.5 years and it has been such a huge blessing to share my life with him. I am so thankful that God was my matchmaker! Surely I would have missed out on just the right person to help me continue to grow in my faith if I had trusted myself rather than God. All praise goes to Jesus my Lord and Savior.

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    Today, while praying that God would guard the heart of one of my beloved daughters (who is in a relationship), I got sidetracked and decided to go through my inbox and there was this post from August that I’d never read, that speaks to my mama’s heart today. Protected, not rejected! Your mindset is lovely!

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