I’ve got some water boiling on the stove for lunch. We’re having reduced fat Velveeta Shells and Cheese. Yes, very nutritious! It’s been years since I’ve had Shells and Cheese and I couldn’t resist the temptation when I saw the box at the grocery store. Since a watched pot never boils, I thought I would come and blog for a minute.
(Pause to cook and eat.)
Mom and I had a very interesting conversation last week in which I was telling her that Curt and I had been at each other’s throats for a couple of days. She suggested that if I would go and “tend to my ministry” (wink, wink), maybe it would help things. At that point we both busted out laughing because, in our family, Mom is known as “The Titus Woman From Heck.” She gave herself that name, actually.
Titus 2:3-5 says, “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”
(Pause to wipe cheese off my child’s body and put him down for a nap.)
We got to talking about some…
(Pause to change his diaper.)
Ahem. We got to talking about some of the more unusual, humorous, or even downright good Titus advice we’d ever given. When I shared mine, my mom laughed really hard about it. It might have been a little funny, but I tell you what! It was needed!
So we thought it would be fun to share some Titus advice. Whether it’s your best, your worst, your funniest, or your most unusual, as long as it’s family friendly, let’s hear it. I’ll share mine in a comment. Let’s hear from some single sisters as well as married ones!
Some of the best marriage wisdom I ever heard came from our Pastor when he came to speak at our Sunday School class (studying marriage at the time).
I’m paraphrasing here, but he basically said: “If we expect our spouse to be our one source of unconditional love, acceptance and purpose, they will disappoint us every time because they are human. Only God can fill that role. If our relationship with God is such that HE is meeting those needs our expectations of our spouse will be much more realistic. The burden is lifted from our spouse to be EVERYTHING. And that is a much easier role to fulfill.”
Jesus, praise You, praise You. I just read what one lady posted about her husband not wanting her to drive on the ice to get to church. I am touched by the post, and what better way for us to see Him today?
Singles. . .I remember when I was the only one left not married. I hated “tagging along” with other couples when we would all go out to eat. The car ride home alone was the worst! I really wondered what was wrong with me. I was so surprised I wasn’t married–I was pretty, a size 6, and nice to everyone (and a little superficial–can you tell?) I know many people have posted about how you’re not a loser–but I just want to let you know that when you say that, I know exactly what you mean. I’m sorry. I’ll go ahead and say that even though you are “blessed” to be single, I’m praying right now that God sends “the one” ASAP. Don’t feel bad asking for people to pray that for you. I asked one of the little old ladies in church to do that for me and her reply was, “Honey, we’ve BEEN praying that for you!” Ha–guess they knew my yearing too.
I love you all!
One instance comes to mind. When my children were little, I was working too much … I had this “great” idea to start a family magazine with a friend of mine (never mind that I was neglecting my own!) I was stressed all the time. One day, at the end of my rope, I stopped by a friend’s house and unloaded my tale of woe. I was particularly concerned about hurting my friend, losing that relationship if I pulled the plug on the magazine. My wise friend said this so sweetly: “Melinda, friends will come and go. Family is forever.”
That is not in any way to diminish the importance of siestas! However, our family is our first priority. I quit, God prepared her heart for it amazingly — and she wasn’t even a believer. I went to her house. She opened the door and without me saying a word said, “You’ve had enough, haven’t you?” We sat down, laughed and cried and shared a tub on Snickers ice cream.
That was 8 years ago. I haven’t regretted putting family first yet!
Some excellent thoughts and comments here, Siestas, thanks for sharing.
I noticed someone commenting on a 30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge. Just wanted to let you know that, if you are interested, you can find that challenge (and many other excellent resources) at http://www.reviveourhearts.com – under Resources, Printable Downloads. Or you can even sign up for an “Online Challenge” with daily reminders. There are also downloads of 31-Days of praying for your pastor, pastor’s wife and husband that I’ve found to be very good.
Blessing to you all.
Thoughts from the lonely loser again… thanks for ministering to me and encouraging me. I love you girls! It means a great deal to me. I appreciate the comments and will take your advice and focus on Jesus to fulfill me. I feel very close to Him and spend a lot of time with Him. I feel ok with being single, but I don’t get that feeling from some married women. Some of us single women will be single until our eternal groom calls us to be with Him, and I am ok with that (although I HOPE to marry someday). I just feel like when I am around other women who aren’t single that I am some part of a group that doesn’t really belong. I am in my thirties and have a career and ministry I am involved in, yet many say, just wait until you are married and have your own kids. That hurts. I know I contribute much to God’s purpose when I allow Him to work through me. Please just don’t look at us single women as those who are just preparing for the right man to knock on our door and sweep us away. A lot of us want that. But if that is all we are preaparing for and hoping for, we will miss out on so much. I don’t know what God has for me but I am excited about my journey. We do have a lot to offer this hurting world. Please know I love you all and cherish you all. I just get so tired of being lumped in the category of the inbetween or akward group because I am in my thirties and am single. No church I have ever been to has a group or ministry targeted for people like me. We are too old for the college and career and don’t really have a place to call our own.
The still lonely, but not a loser, loser
Hey Amanda,
This is my favorite type of post. The teacher in me just can’t help but respond. I’m sure some of you might recall the time Beth asked us to share beauty secrets. I only remember it because I shared something lame about using any excess face moisturizer cream to soften the skin on your elbows.
My Titus 2 woman advise is kinda related to that but way better in that the beauty to which I’m referring far surpasses anything we could get in a jar. Psalm 19:8 says The Precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The Commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes. Precious sisters of mine, whether you are single or married – the more time you spend in God’s presence, in His Word, the more radiant you will become. It’s the beauty of Jesus that is being reflected from your face.
My husband and I will celebrate our silver anniversary this year, but that doesn’t mean I’ve arrived or know all there is to know about marriage. My own parents divorced after 22 years of marriage. The best advice I’ve ever received and would like to now pass on is this. Be proactive in your prayers for your husband and your marriage.
If you’re not married yet, pray this for your parents. If you’re part of a blended family, pray it for all of your parents. Pray in Jesus’ name that the husbands will love God more than they love their wives, that they will love their wives like Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, and that they will love their wives more than they love their own bodies.
For ourselves and all mothers and wives, girls, let’s pray together that we will have the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit that is precious in the sight of God.
Thanks for letting me be part of this community.
Blessings to all,
Patti
wow, i’m late in seeing this post! not sure there is much to add to all the gal-pal widsom…
but i do have a very wise siesta-friend that once told me..
“don’t you walk with anything that can’t lead you!”
Hope it’s not too late to add…
I vividly remember my sweet Grandma trying to tell me that it was important to let men win sometimes and that I shouldn’t “go for the juglar” in arguments with them. This bratty, strong-as-an-ox-willed sixth grader saucily informed her that “if a boy couldn’t handle me and my opinions then I didn’t want him.”
Yikes! 🙂 I’ve since repented of my no-margin-for-error forcefulness, and although single, have come to understand that my Grandma was very right in saying that guys’ sense of worth is often much more fragile than one would realize (and I got to demonstrate that to her before she took off for Heaven). I’ve been able to encourage my brothers and the various men in my life (Dad, Uncles, Grandpa, Pastors, at church, etc.) keeping some of those principles in mind and have been able to better minister to them while (Praise God!) losing some of the awful pride I carried around for quite a long time. It’s even helped when I’ve had to bring up more “challenging” or “controversial” issues, to deal with them in a kinder, less personally-directed (more issue-oriented) manner and I thank God for a wise Grandma who loved her headed-for-disaster granddaughter enough to lovingly tell her that. 🙂
Thanks for the good memories! 🙂
First of all, I hope you don’t mind, but how is it that a single sister finds a spiritual mentor? Every time I’ve asked any older lady at my church, she tends to just “run the other way”.
———————————
My Titus advice might be just to hang onto Jesus with everything you’ve got in you …
In Christ’s Love,
Jennifer
Southern Wisconsin
Dear sweet BEAUTIFUL Lonely WINNER,
Oh how I know that of which you speak! In high school I was voted most likely to be the first one married with a family and at my 10 year reunion I was – it seemed at the time – the ONLY one there alone. I was so very lonely and thought I was a loser.
When I was very young someone that I admired so deeply told me that I first had to find satisfaction in God in order to find it in a mate. If I could not be happy with Him, how could anyone else make me happy?
So, everynight I would pray “God, You are all I need …. now where is he?!?!?!” I turned 30 and faced a medical crisis which led to an early hysterectomy and left me alone and childless … so I thought!
Four years later my church was in turmoil and facing a huge split. I had put my heart and soul into that church – a youth leader, worship leader, part of women’s ministry, not to mention that fact that so very many people that I loved were there. I came to a point that I had to make a choice – stay in my security net or follow God and take a chance … I chose God and I fell on my knees in prayer telling Him that HE was all I needed and if it meant leaving EVERYTHING and EVERYONE behind I would do it to be where He wanted me to be. I had finally and COMPLETELY given myself to Him and FOUND myself in Him and truly felt that I needed nothing else BUT Him …
And that is when He opened my eyes and my heart to some one that had really been there all along. I knew without a doubt that he was what God had intended for me all along. We were married less than a year later and I have never felt more complete – because GOD made me complete first!! I am a wife and a mother (thanks to the miracle of adoption) but I am first adn foremost complete in God and that completion is complimented by the man that God sent just for me.
But I know in my heart that if I was meant to be single – as some women are – I would still be complete. I know this because I found my completion in GOD and in GOD ALONE!!!
I am praying for you – and all in your shoes (because you are not alone) my sweet siesta. You ARE loved and you ARE beautiful and you ARE precious because you are loved by the truest love of all … trust that love and you will be whole. I can not promise that you will find a man, but I can promise that you will NEVER be alone and you are most certainly NOT a loser!!!!!!!!!!!!
To Cherbear who is cold in MN. It is cold here in the Northeast too and the flannels sure do feel good. But I think this “ministry” to our husbands has way more to do with availabilty than wardrobe. I have all the sexy things in my drawer, but it is cold here and when you’re married to a man who is trying to keep the heat bill down, then flannels are just a practical way to manage without complaining. BUT I will tell you that I get CUTE flannels at TJMAXX. They have satin ribbons at the waist, satin trimmed vnecks, cute polka dot patterns and all kinds of options. Besides, who’s to say what is under them.Those sexier items can be put on underneath. The main thing I think is that A)we honor their committment to keep the heat down by supporting that decision and keeping our complaints to ourselves and B)that he knows you are ready anytime.
He won’t care what you have on if you are willing to take it off!
I don’t know if anyone will ever read this since there is another post up now….but I want to leave it anyway….
The one thing I have tried to change this year to be a better “homemaker” wife, is that I am trying to find joy in the everyday household chores. It is so hard….I wanted to be a stay at home mom so I could homeschool our kids and create a peaceful environment. But it only took about a month for the laundry, dishes, picking up toys, vacuuming, just everything to become SO mundane and seemingly useless! I mean, these clothes are going to be piled up again in ONE day, so why do it at all?!!?
I had to give myself a check….this work, no matter how mundane, can bring glory to God, but only if I do it with the right attitude. My ministry in the home is a calling, and I will only get credit for my work done in this calling if I do it “willingly and with obedience” to God. FOR HIM!
Hey Siestas!
I wanted you guys to know that I am about half-way done sorting through all the Roll Call “Favorite Truths.” I am putting them in Biblical order and put in parenthesis how many times the scripture was cited.
As I was reading through them, I was so blessed, that I wanted to read them for myself, and mark them in my Bible. I figured if I was going to do it for my benefit, maybe others would like it to.
So, if you would like me to send you a copy when I’m done, I’ll be happy to. Just email me at [email protected].
BTW Jeremiah 29:11 was the biggest winner with being quoted 99 times. Every NT book was quoted and all but Malachai, Song of Songs, Ruth and 2 Kings (I think) were quoted from the OT. Thanks so much for sharing.
Someone mentioned ironing their husbands work shirts. I like to help him look “professional”, so I iron my husband’s shirts and leave a little love note in the pocket. I’ve gotten creative and left a variety of notes,ie., “This shirt was ironed by a woman in love.” I didn’t know if he’d appreciate it, but I have found the notes in several of his “regular spots” around the house. He likes it!
I am a single siesta, but even as I read your post Amanda, and other siesta’s I looked forward to when I am married again. (divorce after intense 7 years married to a marine) Anyway, has grwon me to be a better wife for the future. My best advice from past to future is to not get your feeling hurt. Guys don’t mean to forget or not listen. Well ok sometimes…but overall I think they want to make us happy. So when you catch them listening reward them with a little “tending to the ministry.” Ladies if we only knew the power we have in taking care of our men. Dinner, a movie and a snuggle session can fix tons!
Eeeek! I keep forgetting and come back to add something else! Pardon my over 40, mom of 3 teens moment!
Don’t be a “mother” to your husband and treat him like one of the kids.
Also, don’t try to be his personal “Holy Spirit” — it never works!
Dear Lonely & all lonelys,
I kept trying to get back to the computer today but just couldn’t get a break from the kids. After reading your post, I wanted to respond and say the following:
Lonely, I am so sorry that the comments were focused in such a way as to give the impression that you were to be excluded. Speaking only for myself, it wasn’t intentional but yet I understand how some things can just really strike a nerve. Please forgive me.
May you find moments of love this weekend that reassure you that you have much to offer us as a community.
Heather
My wonderful husband has an aunt that is pretty close to being certifiable in her craziness. That said we usually allow her to give us humor rather than headache, it just works better that way. The best story about her is from when I was 9 months pregnant with my daughter. No kidding it was 110 outside and to say I was miserable just does no justice to the state I was in. I have to tell you that I wasn’t sleeping because I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t breathe because I am 5 feet tall and had baby all over the place, it wasn’t pretty. Anyway, I was feeling very sorry for myself and was in a state of misery. Well, it was a Sunday afternoon and after services I came home, stripped down to a tshirt and propped myself up on the couch under the ceiling fan and had the house temp at around 50. (My poor husband!) I had just dozed off when the phone rang. I startled awake and answered it to this particular Aunt. She doesn’t hear well so conversations with her are totally one sided. She tells you what she has to say and hangs up. What I heard that day went something like this. “Hey Jill, I just wanted to tell you that I have my whole Sunday school praying for you because you know a lot of times short women die in labor. Got to Go, bye.” I promise you it was exactly what I needed. I started laughing and kept on until I had tears dripping off my face. Fortunately, I guess those prayers were answered because I didn’t die in either one of my children’s births. I have never forgotten how hilarious that was to a self absorbed very pregnant me.
I am a 48 year old widow ( 6 years) raising two kids, 9 and 11. I have learned a great secret.
Jesus is enough. Period.
He has never let me down, in any way, with any need. ANY- He is my husband.
I use the “only argue naked” technique with everyone, and I have never lost a fight.
LOL I’m kidding.
As a single girl (nearing the 30 year mark) it was encouraging to read all of this Titus remarks. When I first started doing Beth’s studies I was very bitter about the fact that I was single and she always talked about “marriage” and
“children” and compared a relationship to God to those life statuses. I figured I just couldn’t get it since I was single and childless. However, my view has changed as I’ve “matured.” I’ve realized that I am in my season where God wants me and I can do things in this season I could not do if I were married becaus I don’t have to rush home and tend to a family. I also am now in a Sunday school class where I am several years older than the regulars so I hope to encourage them that being married isn’t the end all and be all but that we can serve in unique ways until we are called to marriage. I don’t know if God will ever bless me with a spouse, but I know that regardless, I still need to remember some of these in my daily life, especially the parts about keeping my mouth shut, respecting others, etc. And I am thankful that now if I am ever blessed with marriage I have 200+ comments read of Titus 2 advice to remember. 🙂 Thank you dear ladies.
The best advice I ever got for marriage: Take a dictionary and a Sharpie and remove divorce from your dictionary.
The physical act of removing that word from our now “mostly unabridged dictionary” was a very meaningful moment for us, and we have opened it during hard times when we needed to show God’s unconditional love for each other.
Some great advice I have received from a Titus woman in my life is to make sure I play with my little ones. Many times, we are busy ALL day with the laundry, dishes, cleaning etc and our little ones want so much for Mommy to play with them. After all, when they’re grown and gone, they won’t remember how clean the house was, but they will remember the times that mommy played with them.
I am also single in my mid 30’s.
Just yesterday I posted this…
The introduction is from Beth’s study of John.
This is the last paragraph of her introduction:
“As surely as God loved me and timed this study for me, He
will do the same for you. My reasons happened to surround
a wedding. Yours will be entirely unique to you.
In whatever way Christ applies the truths of these pages to
your precious life, let Him romance you along the way.
No matter what may be going on in your life, never forget that
you are a bride.”
Those last four words jumped off the page at me. With Valentine’s
Day around the corner that old feeling of….not again rolls around.
There are posts popping up all around about A Year of Romance…
Please don’t get me wrong…. I am so excited that you Ladies are
writing these posts!! It is so important for you to support and
encourage one another in this. If I were married I’d be right in there
with you and I do read and learn from you. I had just made the
comment the otherday that my “year of romance” will be spent
with Him again this year. There is nothing wrong with that I look
forward to it! However, the way she simply worded “you are a
bride” was just so powerful to me. I have a clever little way of
reminding myself of powerful words of truth….on my cell
phone I type key words in on my screen. Like right now it says
I am a bride.
I found this quote by Maya Angelou “A woman’s heart should
be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first
to find her.”. I personalized it for me and my prayer to Him is
this…I desire to have a heart so hidden in You that a man would
have to seek You first to find me. I know if marriage is for me
it will be ordained by Him.
I ask you to lift me up in your prayers for I will be speaking to
a youth group (Feb. 13th) on abstinence. I know satan will try
to have a field day with me. Pray God will give me the words
and wisdom I need to capture their attention to hear His
message.
Somebody said: Your ministry as a single woman is to pray for your future husband and to prepare yourself to be the wife that Christ has called you to be. THAT is your ministry now.
Single women are old, young, with kids, without kids, widows, divorced, abandoned, looking, not looking…
Please don’t box us in! I have been a wife; I am no longer one. But my ministry now is to grow closer to my Lord and raise my six kids. Just because I am a woman doesn’t make me a candidate for another marriage. In fact, due to emotional and physical fallout that my kids and I deal with daily, I’m guessing that marriage is not going to be part of my future.
RE: Titus women…a friend who is quite a bit older (75) and has a listening heart and encouraging words. So often, they are “This is where we are; what do we do now?” It is marvelous not to hash and re-hash history but instead focus on solving the problem and moving on. I say it to my kids like this: “I don’t need a history lesson — what comes next?”
And…thanks for your wonderful Tods pics, Amanda! They bring back memories…my youngest is 8 now…surely she was that size just last week!
— Alyson
1) FEAR- fear of rejection, fear of what people will think, fear of ‘poverty’, fear of a wasted life, fear of abandonment, fear of the future… Fear kept me in a very unhealthy marriage for 13 years, until the fear of staying the same became greater than the fear of change. I was doing ‘Believing God’ while I was coming out of denial, learning about myself and allowing God to heal my heart through a recovery group and counseling. I still have the prayer at the end of the study taped to my bathroom mirror. I say it every day.
2) But, I still fall into a ‘pothole’ of fear on my own now four years. I’ve broken free from some fear and others I can’t seem to shake. I want to live in the moment! I walk around speaking “The joy of the Lord is my strength!”…but I think TOO much and there are parts of my heart that don’t seem to fully trust God with my life. I try soooo hard to keep my eyes on God instead of my circumstances. I cry out and long to be free!
Regarding the 30-day challenge, IT REALLY WORKS! A few years ago, I had developed a very critical spirit towards my husband. I knew I needed to change – and had actually tried several times, but just didn’t know how to get out of the mess. I heard of this challenge on the radio and decided to try it. About 3 weeks into the challenge, my husband and I were on a roadtrip – and driving along the highway, I looked at him and said, “I am wondering if you have noticed a change in me.” He looked over at me with the most solem face and replied, “Yes, and this time I think you really mean it.” I nearly melted. When I check myself getting out of control, I immediately get back into the challenge! It truly works!
We will celebrate 30 years in March!
Still in love ….
There’s been some talk about single siestas feeling left out and I would have to admit that was me, too…ok, I’m still not perfect and ocassionally struggle with the issue, however, I would not trade seeing the pictures of families and being involved on some level with any of the families that I love. I appreciate your willingness to share as it makes my life more full. So thank you…
I, too am late to the post–since I am single, I actually purposefully didn’t read it b/c I knew it could push all of those buttons about being left out. Then I read Beth’s post today and decided to brave it!
Like “Lonely”, I too, am in my thirties and single, have a career, and am very active at church. She is absolutely right, it feels a lot of the time like there is no place for us to fit in–and I am at a great church with loving saints.
Not feeling like we fit in doesn’t mean we aren’t serving God and loving Him, and I KNOW that He has used my singleness to bring me closer to Him than I ever would have gone voluntarily, but sometimes it’s nice to know there are other people in the same boat! Single siestas, unite! 🙂
A Pastor’s wife friend of ours years ago told me that when she’d get really mad at Pastor Tom that she’d lock herself in the bathroom and pray like David in the Psalms. I thought she was being all spiritual and she says, “I’d say Lord, you know I have to be respectful and loving, so get him, Lord! Knock him across that living room!” LOL I nearly choked! I asked how that was praying like David and she so sweetly said, “well didn’t he pray for the Lord to strike down his enemies?” Then she winked and told me when she was really angry at Tom, after her trip to the bathroom she’d cook his favorite meal and pamper him real good because serving him and truly loving on him always made her feel better.
To all of my single siestas: I know this post is late, but I’m just catching up.
I want to thank you ALL for giving me,a married mom of 3 some hidden Titus advice. My sister is single and sometimes chooses to look for love in all the wrong places. I can be so insensitive to her loneliness, but honestly didn’t realize it until now, until you taught me what I was lacking. When things were not so happy at home, she was my sounding board. How selfish of me to complain about what she wants. Not my man of course, but a marriage and a family. Her heart aches and it just seems like sometimes I am so judgemental of choices she’s made from a lonely heart.
THANK you all for sharing your true feelings of feeling lonely. OH, and Lonely Loser…let me rename you “HIS” which I say stands for HOLY IN SINGLENESS. I encourage you to cry out to God with all you got girlie and see if He doesn’t show up. He loves you so much and you are HIS girl. Let Him be your Main Man and rest in His presence and if & when He brings someone into your life~KEEP relying on your Main Man because if you rely on the human he brings you, you’ll still feel like a Lonely Loser because NO ONE can fulfill lonely hearts like Jesus Christ can.
I love you all~
Lelia
I don’t have a titus women in my life, but I am going to start praying for one! Especially since my best friend is about to move 700miles away to be a missionary!!!
~in need of a titus women…
I was touched this morning reading all of the sweet, tender comments to the loney single women out there.
The encouragement each has given is precious.
I believe this is a reminder to all of us to be more aware of people around us and the comments we make from time to time, even though we mean well. We never know what another person is going through or what they have experienced in their past.
Thank you to all my Siestas and I pray all of you have a blessed weekend.
Love,
Valerie
A sweet Titus friend once compared to me your “ministry” to your husband to having your quiet time. You may not feel like you have the time or energy, but once you get started you’re so glad you did. (:
I’m single and in my mid twenties. I am a million thousand times grateful that God has given me this season to seek Him with all of my heart and to learn from Him BEFORE marriage. I wouldn’t trade these first 3 years of my career for anything, to be able to get up in the morning and spend time with Him, then come home and relax with my Bible, with sermons on Oneplace.com, with Christian music, etc., to journal and pray, to serve at church, etc. —and to LEARN what love, trust, selflessness, etc. truly mean when there’s not so much at stake. I would have been LOST without this season of my life. I trust God and His timing (okay, most of the time!!!;), and know that He will provide for me in ways that I can’t imagine in His time.
I think that being married doesn’t solve your problems and being single doesn’t take away your joy; it is a swap for different struggles and different joys!?!
I am grateful for your posts and insight, and know that my marraige will be enriched for the wisdom here and other places, that God has graciously given me.
And I am thankful for two Titus women in my lives, both of which have been godly mother figures in my life. They have taught my PRIMARILY THROUGH THEIR EXAMPLE, not their words, what godly love and godly marriages look like. I have experienced firsthand what a wife responding with love looks like. WOW. POWERFUL.
I can’t wait to be married and to love a husband and kids one day – but I am grateful that I have a clearer understanding of what that entails instead of the fairy tale image of my youth.
Love to all!!!!!!
This is a really great thread for all of us. I am amazed at all of the wonderful Titus moments.
My family has a tradition at wedding showers where the bride is given a tea pot. Each attendee writes a piece of advice on an index card and places it in the tea pot. Then, the tea pot and its contents are given to the bride with instructions to have a cup of tea and ponder the advice given.
Some 18+ years ago my tea pot contained many pieces of good advice….
Such as….
Let your husband lead your household. Be his helpmate.
Never go to bed angry.
Never stop saying those words, “I Love You”. Never allow that to become something that is just “understood”.
Keep your sink clean and countertops wiped at all times.
Those are some that I can recall at the moment.
Also, many years ago, we attended a marriage conference conducted by Rodney and Selma Wilson where we were given some GREAT advice for marriages. My favorite of which was, “never forget…..women are like crock pots; men like the light switch”. Know what I mean?
I love reading everyone’s advise! When I first got engaged, a girl from my workplace gave me some advice that has stuck with me. She told me that if an issue came up which might result in a fight between me and my husband, to first evaluate the issue and see if it would matter in a few years ,if not, then it wasn’t really worth fighting over. (it’s hard to remember when you think something is a big issue at the time, but it’s saved me from some meaningless arguments a time or two)
Have a great weekend!
I am so enjoying reading and posting blog comments. This ministry is Titus Advice. I have been blessed by this group of women. I am learning how to give, encourage and be a blessing to others.Thank you and PRAISE GOD from whom all blessings flow!!
Chris from Canada… I loved your comment! When I give my hubbie all of me I get Bath and Body Works gift baskets! It’s such a lovely thing! Give ’em what they want and ya’ll get what YOU want! GLORY! 🙂
To your comments about UNITY AMONG DIVERSITY, I think that is GREAT advice! I love when the Body focuses on what makes us One in Christ!
I heard a church motto that says something similar, and I love it so much I’ll share it here:
“In Essentials, Unity
In Non-Essentials, Liberty
In all things, Charity”
great idea! really enjoyed reading all the posts!
My best advice for young married women (works for both spouses as well):
STAY & PRAY!
It’s that simple, stick it out and pray a lot! God will honor your commitment and bless you in your prayers while communing with Him.
Titus Bumper stickers:
1) Who you are in private is who you really are!
2)Do the next right thing for the next right reason.
3)Always enter into a relationship with who a person is rather than what you need them to be.
4)When desperation meets divinity, destinies are fulfilled!
My mother-in-law gave my husband and I this advice before we were married 21 years ago….”Words are like feathers, once they have been scattered they can’t be gathered.” Be careful what you say in the heat of an argument. They can leave deep wounds and large scares. I can’t say I have always followed this rule but I do try. Slow to speak and quick to listen.
Hi girls!! This was a great post.
My Mama is always serving up some good Titus Advice!! The best of which, I just cannot bring myself to post here, out of respect for her, and for modesty’s sake! Just suffice it to say it was about “intimacy with your man”. 😉
I have missed visiting here, and I am just getting caught up on the recent goings on. Sorry I was unable to comment on your “BFree” posts. I have been struggling a bit lately, and feeling the need to break out my Breaking Free book to review some of the lessons I have learned. The enemy is cunning, and he has ways of waiting until we are “comfortable” to attack us where he knows it hurts the most. (If your interested, you can stop by my blog for all the “gory details”…)
I just thought it was neat how God’s timing for your post, and my thoughts on the matter kind of coincided. He’s good like that isn’t He? Yes He is… All the time!!
The best Titus advice I received as a young woman was from my mom. She told me to always put Jesus first, my husband second and everything else would take care of itself.
After 24 years of marriage, she was right on the money.
Jan
threemenandamom
If it’s wisdom you wisely seek
Of five things take care;
To whom you speak
Of what you speak
And how and why and where.
This is some good Titus woman advice. For years, when anybody would ask me for marriage advice, I would say, “The less you can say, the better!” I’ve found this to be true in all situations in life, but when I saw it so eloquently put in a “Little House on the Prairie” book, I’ve updated the way I put it.
My favorite principal that I’ve learned is that marriage is NOT 50/50. It’s 100% of yourself, no matter what. The harmony comes when both spouses are living it that way, but sometimes it means that one is doing 100% while the other does 20%, and that’s tough, but the 100%-er will be what carries that marriage thru until you’re bothing giving 100% again.
When 100%-all-the-time (and sometimes on-your-own) gets tiring, when your spouse isn’t/can’t be 100%, where else can you go but to Jesus? I’ve seen times in our marriage when both my husband and I have been less than 100% and I’ve cried, begging God to translate our marriage to something more, and He’s always done it. And He always starts with re-aquainting me with Himself. You can imagine how powerful my marriage is when we go to God together BEFORE hubby and I dropped below 100%.
I waited all week for a new blog post, since I just found this wonderful blog–and the comments were closed for the Jan 27th post.
And–finally–a new post—-but comments are closed–once again! Guess I’m just not fast enough.
I am one of those single siestas—trying to fight for my spot– : )—– so —I just picked an old post to comment on—–and I guess I’ll have to keep more on my toes from now on! 🙂
I have have found that http://www.mommydotcom.blogspot.com has GREAT PARENTING ADVISE. It is all based in the Word. She has a way with making God’s standards seem doable in the modern times of today. She is very encouraging and will answer my questions on her blog. She also wrote a Bible study appropriately named Parenting with Patience and Living in Peace.
Two of the younger ladies at my church were talking about how they would “do as they please” and not what their husbands said – not in a joking manner and I told them that if they submit to the husband that God would be pleased and they would in turn be a blessing to their man – that was about 7 years ago. Last night after church I overheard one of these ladies telling a younger than her wife the same advise. It was so great to see the chain of “teaching and learning” right before my eyes. God is so sweet to let us see sometimes the way He has chosen to use us. By the way, thanks Amanda for all the work you do with this blog. That seems like it would be a full time job. I am guessing it is! Thanks again, Vicki