Keith walks through the door gruffly and slaps a plastic bag on the kitchen counter.
Him: “You wanna hear something awful?”
Me, bracing myself because I really didn’t want to hear something awful but my man was clearly disturbed: “What is it, Baby? What happened?”
Him: “You can’t even get a Moon Pie at Kroger anymore. You can’t get the danged thing at Randall’s. You can’t even get one at Amanda’s fancy HEB. Not a Moon Pie on a single shelf. Good grief.”
Me: Silent. Staring. Baffled.
Him: “Do you know the only place in this town you can find a Moon Pie anymore is Bass Pro Shop?”
Me: “I had no idea.”
But, thought to myself that it might explain some things. However, I didn’t say that. He was too raw. Been through too much. This was no time to speak the truth in love. This was the time for lies.
Me again: “That’s awful, Honey. I’m so sorry.”
There was only one thing that was going to make my man feel better. Our spirits intertwined, we both seemed to know. I nodded toward the bag and he opened it. He pulled out a chocolate Moon Pie. I pulled out a banana Moon Pie. And we ate them in total silence.
But in my heart I felt that inner glee bloggers feel when you know that you’ve just had an encounter that is destined to become a spectacular blog post. It’s a rush of sparkling, clean adrenalin. Keith was just about to head to the ranch so I said, plotting, of course, “Honey, do you want me to just send you with a couple of these and save the rest?” (He’d gotten a large bag full. After all, they’re hard to find.) So, he said, just as I knew he would, “Yep, that’s what we better do.”
So he headed out the door and down I-10 with a ration of one-a-day and I headed to work with a bag of Moon Pies. On my way, I called AJ and said, “Bring your camera to lunch. I have some pictures I need you to take for a blog post. It’s going to be great.” Only, when she came to lunch, between the baby and all the commotion of the restaurant, she didn’t have time to take the shots.
Her: “Can I take them home with me and do it there?”
Me: “Yep, and then be sure to give them to Curtis.” And that was the exact moment the plan went totally awry. MY MEANING WAS: GIVE THEM TO CURTIS SO HE CAN BRING THEM BACK TO WORK AND I CAN RETURN THEM UNSCATHED TO THE KITCHEN OF KEITH MOORE, MY MOON PIE MAN.
Thinking we clearly understood one another, I promptly forgot.
Until last night after Keith got home from the ranch and I heard the biggest ruckus in the kitchen followed by colorful choices of words.
Me: “What on earth is the matter?”
Him: “I can’t find my Moon Pies!”
Me, but only to self: “Oh my gosh. Please, no.”
So I text AJ: “Your father is tearing the kitchen apart looking for his Moon Pies. Where are they?”
Oh, the painful finality of her response. At times of crisis, all you can do is turn to Scripture.
“She took of the [Moon Pie] thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her, and he did eat.”
And swore I’d told her to.
It was a rough night at the Moore house. Sometimes a man doesn’t need his woman. He just needs his Moon Pie. The man has the taste buds of a ten year-old.
Thank goodness, the sun came up again this morning even after a moonless night. But there will be a reckoning at Bass Pro today.
Here are the moon pies before things went wrong – very, very wrong.
And the bag from Bass Pro.
So, OK, Siestas. So it made me think about you. What treat from your childhood do you still long to have?
Thanks for the chuckle…I needed that.
I have fond memories of sitting on the front porch of my grandaddy’s country store and pouring a small bag of salted peanuts into a coke (glass bottle of course) just how he taught me. What a great taste of sweet and salty! Got to be careful drinking of course so you don’t get choked on a peanut!
I still love orange push-ups. I remember having sticky orange ice cream residue on my hands and face from that delicious treat.
Boston Baked Beans, French Chew, Zagnut, Big Daddy bubble gum. You can’t find the gum any more, but Thank God the rest is still available in some stores.
Someone mentioned chocolate gravy and biscuits – Oh!!!!! I had forgotten how wonderful that is!!! Haven’t had it since I was a kid. I’m going to call my Mom right now and see if she will make me some. I know that chocolate gravy and biscuits will be in heaven!!!
Too funny – really needed the chuckle! Helped bring prespective to the day……a merry heart. Thanks!
My favourite, that I haven`t seen for years, was “Turkish Delight” chocolate bars.
Diane from Canada
Mallow Cups and you can only get them at a Cracker Barrell. Moon pies are also there!!! If you have a Bi-Lo you can actually ask them to order them for you.
IMO…the ones at Bass Pro are nasty…I HATE the double deckers!!!!
Miss
Lemon candy sticks. Striped and sugary and easy to bite not the hard candy slick ones. Haven’t found them in years. The one I can still get and my all time favorite (responsible for my first baby being 10.7 lbs and cravings) Hostess Cupcakes!
Sam’s Has Moon Pies By The Case!!
Does anyone remember Fudge Town sandwich cookies by Burry – from the sixties? Also, Ideal Cookies by Nabisco – also from the sixties. Could eat about seventeen of those…. 🙂
Funny stuff! I love the sugar cookies we made at Christmas because my mom would frost them with vanilla frosting (dyed all sorts of colors) and sprinkles. Either that, or (I know this sounds weird) sliced bananas in milk with sugar sprinkled on top. One of my favorites!
Actually, I just thought of one, the “Big Chew” bubblegum that came in the pack that looked like the real chew. I don’t think they even sell that anymore. I used to stuff a big wad in my mouth, the best!
Love the new blog, very soothing to the eyes. Well done! My childhood favorites…a good piece of coconut cream pie(hard to find these days) and a coke with a teaspoon of vanilla.
Anne
Hysterical…I may be the only native Texan who has never eaten a Moon Pie…the look of them just never appealed to me.
Tell Keith, I am fairly certain I have seen them at Bucees…my husband stocks up on weird things going to and from Menard, TX via Bucees.
HAAA! Y’all… that was funny! 😀
“you are too twisted for color t.v.”
Meaning: I love your sense of humor!
(sigh) WHY do things like Spaghettios and Little Debbie snack cakes just not taste nearly as good as an adult as they do when you’re eight?
I love you BethMoore. Better head to Bass Pro. You know you’ll probably be getting cases of Moon Pies in the mail from all your Siestas now! hee hee
LOL – literally!!! Thanks for sharing the hilarious story.
Sweet treats from my childhood (not that I would actually enjoy eating these now, but they provide sweet memories…my older sis would purchase these for me from the corner candy store): Boston Baked Beans, Candy lipsticks & necklaces, Chick-o-Sticks, Moon Pies, Red Hots, Pop Rocks, Swedish Fish, and the candy flavored powder with the chalky white dipping sticks (forgot what they're called).
Food I miss from my childhood that I would enjoy eating now: Korean food! I spent a few years in S. Korea and developed a keen liking for the cuisine. Yum! 🙂
Goo-Goo clusters
marshmallow cream spread on graham crackers
and Coke floats. My kids are quite expert at making their own Coke floats (i’m so proud)
I used to LOVE raspberry ice cream from Baskin Robbins. No one else in my family would touch it! So when my birthday came around and I was asked what kind of cake I wanted, I naturally said an ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins with raspberry ice cream inside! Yummy! I got to eat the whole thing all by myself because nobody else in my family wanted even a taste!
Cherry O Letts…a mound of chocolate*peanutty with cherry cream and little cherry on the inside…the combo is delicious!
An A&W root beer in a frosted mug.
Even better if purchased at a drive-up diner and sipped while standing between mom and dad on the front seat of the car (you have to be younger than 10 for this to work)
🙂
Enough said.
Have Keith check at Super Wal Mart. Ours had tons! All sizes and quantities. If you can’t find them in TX, feel free to come to Panama City Beach and I’ll be glad to help ya out – otherwise, I’ll ship some your way 🙂
I was born in Alaska…the beautiful village of Sitka, to be exact. But soon after, at 18 months, we moved to the interior, to Fairbanks. Life there is much harsher with 50 degrees below zero in the winter yet soaring to the 90degree makr in the summer. My first ice cream was from a local dairy and it was made from the plentious blueberries found in those parts. They were huge and their flavor was even larger. I would eke out that ice cream cone ever so gently, making a peak, then declaring to my father, “Look Mt. McKenley!” I’d love a taste of that ice cream today.
Chocolate Pepsi…thought I invented it.
Thanks for the laughs!
How funny!
Here in Maine we call moon pies “Whoopie Pies” and they are the BEST. If I could figure out a way to send a few to LPM and stay fresh, I would try! Last year our town newspaper held a “Best Whoopie Pies Around” contest and the winner was Friers’ Bakeshop… run by a few wonderful friers in their robes. Their whoopie pies are so good you have to get there before noon because they sell out quickly!
– Michelle
Bangor, Maine
I live in Turkey, and there is a Turkish version of the moon pie; it is extremely popular. They’re sold in every corner market. I’ve been served them in neighbor’s homes with tea. My kids take them in their lunchboxes. So when we are in the states it’s good to know I can find one at the Bass Pro shop. Thanks for the tip. My children, husband, and I thank you.
Icey cold coke and/or my Grandmother’s sweet housekeeper, Miss Willie Mae’s banana pudding. Oh, wow, how good and I’ve learned to duplicate it. I took a fresh dish to our Sunday School class one morning and it was a big hit, and very smart of me, thank you very much, I saved my man a cupful for afterwards.
I have the same exact cravings as Keith. Why do you think I left California and moved to Nashville? I tried to get my former California boss (you know the one) to bring them back when he would be here on business. He told me in no uncertain terms he would not support my junk food habits.
My favorite treat from childhood is either A. Nog (my dad’s own recipe for pretty much a really good strawberry/orange smoothie) or B. Strawberry Shortcake (the recipe off of the Bisquick box) OHHHH YUM…the strawberries!!
HOME-MADE popcorn balls!
HOME-MADE chocolate icing spread thick between graham crackers!
Rootbeer barrels (hard candy)!
Oh these flashbacks are driving me crazy!!!!!
Hmmmm…favorite childhood treat….Hostess cupcakes, Bit o Honeys, and loading up in the station wagon to head to the A&W Root Beer stand where dad would get the "Papa Burger", Mom would get the "Mama Burger" and we kids would get the "Baby Burgers"…with Root Beer floats of course!
Chicklets…the tiniest square of colorful gum in that little envelope pack.
I love the Little Debbie’s Stat Crunch! YUM!!!
Banana Laffy Taffy! The big ones that fill up your mouth when you put the whole thing in at once!
Oh and of course Lucky Charms. I’m thrilled my son loves them because if I eat from his box it doesn’t count, right?
little debbie oatmeal creme pies. YUM!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for the story, another great one!!
Hostess Suzy Q’s or the oatmeal cookies with cream sandwiched in between. Haven’t had either one in years!
That is so funny! Well, I must say we have plenty here in Chattanooga! 😉 Gotta love that good ole Chattanooga Bakery! 🙂
I love the new look! One of these days I will figure out how to have my own blog name.
I can't pass up plain M&M's, ever. My Mom would (very rarely) give me 2 dimes and I would take off for the grocery store in our town of 814 people. There, I would buy the M&M's and then walk up the sidewalk to the laundry mat that had a pop machine and buy me an Orange Crush in the glass bottle…it just didn't get any better than that. I would take them home and lay under the tree in our yard and slowly eat them by color and sip and savor my drink; it was a little bit of heaven here on earth for this little girl.
Thanks for asking; it's a sweet memory I had forgotten about…now it's off to find some M&M's; I'm sure I have some hidden here in the house somewhere…
Love ya'll…Joni Leahy
You can still purchase Moon Pies at Kroger in Spring (off Rayford). You can also purchase them at the 99 Cents store in The Woodlands.
I know this is the wrong place to tell you – and I promise I’m going to tell you – about my childhood favorite treat thing, BUT….
We just had the FIRST EVER Beth Moore event at my little church in a tiny little town in the mountains, in the middle of nowhere!
The women loved it and loved you, Beth!! We did Loving Well at a very rustic place (back still aching…no sleep making — old pine, single bunkbeds).
They laughed and cried and laughed and shared and hugged and ate…alot..and loved everyone extremely well!
We are only 2 and half hours from Knoxville, so we can relate to Texas hair :-)We are really close to Travis’ Boone, NC hometown.
Amanda – you had just found out you were pregnant with Jackson! I had to show the women all the new pics of big boy Jackson and his beautiful little sister, Annabeth.
They felt like they knew you all and loved you!
Thank you, Beautiful Beth for loving Our Father enough to be obedient and share your past. I shared my similar past as well and even though only one other could relate – they left with so much more love and compassion.
Only the Holy Spirit can do that and when you told the story of the old man in the Knoxville airport – they all laughed until they cried and then bawled until they used all the tissues in the gift bags!
Our oldest retreat lady was 79 years old and it was the one year anniversary of her faithful and godly husband’s death. We treated her like a Queen!
We love you, Beth…thank you again.
Ok…after that weekend I need to curl up with a book and a bag of chips and french onion dip and a Dr. Pepper straight up and cold..no ice! Still my favorite!
Love you guys,
T
p.s. Keith would love it around our mountains. We grow Moon Pies everywhere!
I hate Moon Pies but my sister loves them, they are impossible to find here as well, ran across some at FREDS (obscure little store) and bought a whole bunch of them for her Birthday. Somethings are priceless, the memories I mean not necessarily the Moon Pies.
Shalom
You know they sell Moon Pies at Cracker Barrel if there’s one in your area.
in high school (around 9th and 10th grade) my best buddy and i always split a Honey Bun and a Mountain Dew. I haven’t had that combo in years, but those mingling flavors are never to be forgotten! 🙂
Twinkies!
banana pudding! Used to eat it for breakfast. It does, after all have bananas in it!
Ok, I am going to date myself….I want a huge candy bar like we used to get for 5 cents….told you I would date myself.
I love Mars Bars and Mallowcups and they are hard to find here.
Love the post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blessings,
Bible Bunny in NO MI
I have a Moon Pie story for you! It's actually a story about my Mom when she was little, but Keith will surely feel her pain. This probably happened around 1942 or 1943. My Mom's family didn't have a lot of money when she was growing up. They lived in the country & once a week or so, there was a truck that drove around their road that sold stuff. They called it 'the rolling store'. It had things like flour, sugar, coffee, etc. They also sold Moon Pies. She said that one day her mom was buying a few things from it & my mom asked her for a moon pie. Her mom told her she couldn't have one. My mom said she now knows that they didn't have the money to buy one, but at the age or 3 or 4, she didn't understand it then. My mom said that when the 'rolling store' started driving away & she was 'without moon pie' she started having a fit. She said she cried all the way into the house & when she got inside, she laid down on her back & kicked the wall. She said that was the only fit she ever remembered having. It's a joke with us today. Whenever she gets mad about something I ask her if she's going to lay down & kick the wall. LOL! You should share this story with Keith. If he ever gets upset over not being able to find a Moon Pie he could just think of the rolling store driving away. Maybe if he laid down & kicked the wall it would make him feel better!!
Patti
TN
I am in Cracker Barrel and they are selling a box of 12 Moon Pies for $4 per box. Vanilla and chocolate flavors. Mmmmmm…Maybe they retail on their website or by calling a restaurant direct. Enjoy!
LOVE LOVE LOVE the NEW LOOK!!
Fun stuff!
Ok, now I have another post I get to share with my Honey!
You are sooo funny! I do remember the moon pies…cracks me up!
My brother loved them when we were kids.
My favorite crave from my childhood is Twinkies and Ding Dongs!! Love them, hardly buy them though! Maybe God will have them in heaven! Maybe they’ll be Organic!! LOL
Read your blog to my man. He laughed and said he could so relate to Keith. Men and their addictions to certain food, go figure.
Terrie
If anyone else from Slidell, LA reads this I am sure that they have already told you to please come to Slidell for Mardi Gras next year!! We have the official and I mean OFFICIAL, Slidell Mona Lisa Moon Pie Parade. It is the best parade. I mean who needs beads thrown at you when they throw your Keith’s beloved Moon Pies. We come home with bags and bags of them – which my son savors all year. It is a family affair with everyone dressed up in zany costumes and walking with the flaming torch carriers lighting the way. You could come once and be set for a couple of years – and they are free! I’ll save you a spot next year.