A few weeks ago, I swerved my car into the parking lot adjacent to the Chick Fil A restaurant six miles from my country house and glanced at my watch, so glad that I was on time. I knew we’d only have a few minutes. Most of the parking lot at the restaurant had already been roped off and overtaken with a stage, large speakers and lights. Fold out chairs were set in rows facing the platform but I know a little about the spiritual side of Houston and that most of those listeners would only sit in those chairs until the first note. Then they’d be up on their feet. This is a hot, sweaty, some-might-even-say-homely town in a lot of ways but it is a fair and lovely place to those who love Jesus. Maybe one of the reasons is that our area is home to a really fabulous, award-winning Christian contemporary radio station – KSBJ, 89.3 FM – that serves as a central station for unity, that turns up the volume on worship and still fights harder to win souls than awards. They host something called “Brown Bag Concerts” throughout the year where they bring in various CCM artists to do concerts at different Chick Fil A restaurants around the city. (I feel so sorry for you – truly I do – if you do not live where there is a Chick Fil A or, worse yet, if you have no idea what one is. Move.)
That day the artist going up on stage was Christy Nockels. My pastor of 25 years, John Bisagno, used to say, “All people bring gifts to the church. Some people are gifts to the church.” Christy would be one of those. A year or so ago (not sure how long it’s been), we invited her to one of our LPM Tuesday night community Bible studies. As I sat to the side and watched the women packed in that sanctuary and the aisles, lifting their faces throne-ward, many of them with their eyes closed and their hands raised, and listened to their voices in almost perfect pitch with hers, I had a revelation of sorts. I realized that in so many ways, Christy is to this generation what Amy Grant was to mine. She helps place words on the tongues of true worshipers who want so much to express themselves to God but don’t always know how to say what they feel. That makes a person a gift.
As I got out of my car and headed across to Chick Fil A, I spied my two friends, Christy and Nathan, and they were grinning at me just like I was grinning at them. We hugged then headed into the small RV so we could chat a little while. Mike McCloskey, who was managing the evening for them, asked me if I wanted anything from the restaurant while we were visiting and, of course, I did. “Nuggets and an Ice Dream? Oh, and Polynesian Sauce?” And in minutes, I had them. While I spooned Ice Dream into my mouth (always spoon down, for some reason), we conversed quickly like a couple of people on borrowed time. We talked mostly about their kids, my kids, and my grandkids, and did a bit of musing about Passion 2012 and had some wild thoughts about Passion 2013. We got out pictures on our iPhones and even watched a video their son Noah had created. (Actually, it was astonishingly impressive. But I guess his gene pool is nothing to whine about, now is it?)
Mike reminded them about the time and Christy glanced over at me and said, “Hey, Beth, do you care if we rehearse one song really quickly?”
“Absolutely not. Please, do!”
And so I sat right there on the couch in that RV, six inches from Christy to my right and Nathan across from us, leaning in with his guitar. We were all three crouched in about 4 square feet. And I listened to a song I’d never heard from a voice truly as beautiful as any I’ve ever heard. The album is out now so you may well have already heard it but I really need you to join me in the intimacy – no, the strange sanctity, really – of that small RV and hear it again. With nobody else listening. Just you. Just the voice singing. Just that guitar. And Jesus.
“I’m so concerned with what I look like from the outside.
Will I blossom into what You hope I’ll be.
Yet You’re so patient just to help me see.
The blooms come from a deeper seed that You planted in me.
Sometimes it’s hard to grow when everybody’s watching.
To have your heart pruned by the one who knows best.
And though I’m bare and cold, I know my season’s coming.
And I’ll spring up in Your endless faithfulness.
With my roots deep in You, I’ll grow the branch that bears the fruit.
And though I’m small, I’ll still be standing in the storm.
‘Cause I am planted by the river by Your streams of living water.
And I’ll grow up strong and beautiful, all for Your splendor, Lord.
So with my arms stretched out, I’m swaying to Your heartbeat.
I’m growing with the sound of Your voice calling.
You’re bringing out the beauty that You have put in me.
For Your joy and for Your glory falling.”
Written by Christy Nockels and Nathan Nockels, Copyright 2012 sixsteps Music/worshiptogether.com Songs/Sweater Weather Music (ASCAP) (Admin. at EMICMGPublishing.com)
As that melody floated in the air, I pictured Annabeth running down the path from my house to Big Pops and Memmaw’s, sunlight dancing in her dark honey hair. I pictured Amanda and Melissa, each of them growing up before my eyes in Christ. So, so different from the other, just the way they’ve always been, but equally breathtaking. My mind cased across the faces of so many women I’ve seen, faces reflecting the light bouncing from an open page of Scripture. Oh, now, you know I love our brothers. But I’m not called so much to our brothers. I’m called mostly to sisters. And somehow the lyrics touched me in a deep place for all of us. Deep enough that I’ve thought of it every day since then and played it many times in the same car I pulled into that parking lot. Now I know it almost by heart. But that day I knew it more by faith. More by growing experience.
I want to say to you today that I watch many of you fight this good fight, trying to keep your equilibrium in this crazy culture where – for the most part – a woman is as desirable as she is sensual. Or, on the other side of the spectrum, she’s as valuable as she is marketable. I want to cheer you on and say to you, Good Job! And Don’t Give Up! And don’t forget, no matter what this world tells you, that the most gorgeous blooms come from a deeper seed. The lyrics ring so true. “It’s hard to grow up when everybody’s watching.” And sometimes God lets others behold the pruning process in us when we’d just as soon have done it in private. But He always knows what He’s doing. And He is only doing you good. Never evil. Never harm. He cannot be unbiased toward you. The blood of His Son flows through your veins. Even through the silence He is talking. Even in the stillness, He is moving. He is hemming you in. He is closing in on you to open you up to Him.
All that you are going through, all that you are learning, is bringing out the beauty that He has put in you. And some of those same folks who watched the pruning will see the blooming.
I just want you to know that I already see it happening. And others already see it, too. And if you’d look really close, not into your rear view mirror, but into His Word, I think you could even catch a glimpse of it.
You get more beautiful by the day, Darling Child. Don’t be discouraged. Don’t decide it can’t matter all that much. “For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for His name in serving the saints, as you still do.” (Hebrews 6:10) He will see to you until you are stunning for His splendor.
I know your season’s coming.
PS. I totally forgot until this morning (Tuesday) that we snapped this picture that day in the RV on my iPhone. If you’re like me, you love pictures in blog posts. If you’re not like those of us who do, stop reading now. Laughing. Man, I so love you guys.
Thank you for your heart for God and His People, Beth.
Janelle
A Story of Grace
I always love the timing of your posts! Thank you for the encouragement and blessing.
Love,
Sarah
What perfect timing from God! Thanks Beth for sharing the words of this song. My Bible study group has been studying “Duty or Desire?” by Tammie Head, and we just finished the lesson on pruning and growing more fruit. We discussed examples of pruning in our lives and what “fruit” is. I think God is telling me to meditate more on this topic. Thanks for nudging me Beth!
And what is the book we are going to study this summer? I am getting so anxious to know!;)
Beth, I just finished So Long, Insecurity yesterday. I wrote 10 index cards of scriptures at lunch a few minutes ago. They sit here about 2 feet from where I sit at my desk at work, in case I need to stand right up and re-read them in faith! Reading this blog entry has huge tears brimming in my eyes, and I am so very thankful. Christy Nockels and her husband visited Darmstadt, Germany, when I lived there (2005-08) and gave an intimate acoustic concert in a chapel conference room for about 30 or 40 of us. Thank you so much for sharing their song today, and the truth that His beauty is being grown in us. In ME. His words through you have brought me great joy.
Last few years have been hard, hard, hard seasons. But I’ve got the spiritual guts to know that God WILL BRING IT FORTH FOR MY GOOD. He will be pleased to know I give Him all the glory for what He has done, is doing and will do with our children, our marriage, and our aging parents. My bloom will come as sure as the sun rises, and as sure as the sun rises, I will rise from the grave by God’s mighty power.
Oops! Should have said 1995-98! Wrong decade! 🙂
Hi, Lori 🙂
Darmstadt? REALLY? I was there from 1993-1996. Hmmm…wonder if perhaps our paths crossed? Did you sit under Bart Physioc in the Protestant chapel services? What good memories you have brought my way – thank you! Blessings to you, my sister 🙂
Tatia…Amazing to see you mention on this blog a family I have known for 20 years, and have great admiration for. I taught Dawn and Bart’s daughter at Fort Bragg prior to their tour in Darmstadt. I made a trip over to visit them while they were living in Darmstadt. Small world, isn’t it?
You will never know this side of heaven what this specific encouragement means to my heart right now. Thank you.
I can’t say it any more perfectly than Gretchen did, so I’ll just second her comment: “You will never know this side of heaven what this specific encouragement means to my heart right now. Thank you.”
Oh, and just to let you know, Beth, you and I walked together tonight around my Colorado neighborhood. I listened to a LPL talk on OnePlace.com on my iPhone. So wonderful!
So God is truly amazing. He really does never cease to show me how awesome He really is. I say this because I was lying in my bed praying (as my 2 kiddos are taking a nap:)) and just thinking of all the cool stuff God can do through this new ministry at my church that I help start. It’s called First Sunday Serve. The first Sunday of the month we are going to do something community oriented. I have been discouraged because for the month of May I could not find anything for us to do. Crazy to me that I couldn’t find something for us to volunteer for but it’s true. Anyway, I was just thinking about what God has planned for me. If it is this or something bigger. My heart is huge on reaching the lost and broken for Christ. I love singing. It is my passion even though my voice isn’t the greatest and my timing stinks. I think of Moses and how God used him in spite of his stuttering. I look forward to see Gods plans for my life. When I was praying I thought of you Miss Beth (so I decided to look up your blog which I’ve never done before) and just the ministry you have. How did it start; what were you like as a youngen; were you like me.. Feeling a bit lost and overwhelmed, by life’s circumstances which seem so little in comparison to what God has made you today. I’m not sure if any of this makes any sense except that God used your handwritten voice to encourage me to keep doing what I’m doing for His glory. There is major pruning that needs to take place ALWAYS I say:). Thank you for being used and being my gift;) thanks for listening to my blabbering!!
Hugs,
Casey (28)
I’ve been going through such hard times this year…
but this post has encouraged me…thank you.
Thank you Mama Beth, I know it’s not a mistake that I decided to come over to the blog today. Praise God!
I asked God to help me today – begged Him to help me. Here it is – the help I needed. Thank you, Ms. Beth. Love to you.
He loves you so much, Hilary. Watch for God to approach your situation with His help from a different angle than He has before.
I know not to read your blogs during the work hours, it ruins my makeup every time!! I’m gonna refer to you as Mama Beth from now on. Feel so loved and well taken care of through this blog. And even though the pruning can be so painful, and especially when in the public eye, if it brings God more glory that way, then it’s all the more worth it!! He’s so deserving!
Beth, thanks for sharing this. really enjoyed reading this.
I am so glad you did a post about this particular song on Christy’s new album. The minute I heard I it immediately thought about the next to last session in the James Bible study, when part of the lesson went to 1 Kings 18. I think this song goes perfectly with that lesson and how each of should press on because “our season is coming”.
I also absolutely can’t stop listening to the new cd. I hear something different each time I listen. Highly recommed it to any and everyone.
Thanks for the post and the encouragement!
Thak you Beth. Beautiful. I’m sharing this and the song with my James Bible study group tonite. So glad God uses you in the way He does.
Lawan
Phil 4:8
Beautiful post! Thank you Beth. Silly me, I bought this album weeks and weeks ago and FORGOT! Listening now and I’m already in LOVE.
Beth – beloved siesta Mama – thank you, thank you, thank you. I’m in a dry and dusty place right now. Thanks for the cup of cold water. May you be blessed 10fold!
LuAnn
Beth,
You could not know how meaningful your words are today. I feel like it was a little hug from God today. Just what I needed! Thank you!!!
I really, really, really needed to hear this. Tears, thanks and much love.
As a child, I had no hero held higher than Amy Grant. Do you remember how, in elementary school, there was a “personal interest” photo shoot each year? Every kid was allowed to bring whatever prop represented them that year. My classmates brought soccer balls, basketballs and the occasional flute. And what did I bring? Oh, just my entire collection of Amy Grant cassette tapes, posters and various memorabilia including a magazine that featured her on the cover. No joke.
Christy Nockels’ voice has escorted me through treacherous high school years, break-ups in college, all night paper writing sessions and the vast emptiness of direction known as “What do you plan to do when you graduate from college?” I think my favorite songs of hers, though, are the ones I used to play on repeat for the little girls I took into my home for a year. I used to play a certain playlist — filled with her and Kari Jobe — for the girls at every single naptime. For every season of the last 12 years of my life, there’s a Watermark or Christy Nockels song to go along with it.
I’m definitely being pruned now, before marriage. I’d say it is one of THE biggest seasons of pruning in my life so far. The best part is that I have a sneaking suspicion that actually being married will bring a whole new season of pruning along with it.
Amy Beth, listen to what I’m about to say to you because it’s the truth: God called your name specifically to my mind as I planned this post this morning on the way to work. As He scrolled different faces from our blog community through my mind, yours was one of them. I knew in my heart He was directing the post to all of you, but there must be a reason why He brought you to my mind in particular. I’ll leave it between the two of you to determine what He’s trying to confirm, if anything at all. Sometimes I accidentally make things up. You are loved here, Child. I know I’m not making that up. And yes, get some of that pruning done BEFORE the wedding. Enough will come afterward. Grin.
Amy Beth, and Beth, this is so beautitful the conversation between each of you and God. I feel like I should take off my shoes (Holy ground). Thank you Beth for replying to Amy Beth with such love, once again teaching me how to love with the love of the Lord.
Wow.
And yes, I know exactly what He’s trying to confirm through this. Maybe one day I’ll get to tell you the story when I stop by your mansion in heaven to borrow some hairspray.
P.S. – Did you read / watch “Julie and Julia?” I wish we could be “Beth and Amy Beth.”
P.P.S. – Except I don’t think it would work for me to write a book about cooking all of your recipes given that I can’t exactly cook.
P.P.P.S. – Please don’t tell Paul I can’t really cook. We are SO close to the altar and don’t need anything to derail us now. 😉
Feeling sore from pruning and not very beautiful, thank you for this healing word. Much love to you, Miss Beth.
Thank you for such a beautiful reminder of how God loves us and makes us beautiful inside and out. I also like Christy Nockels, especially the song “Waiting, Here for You” with our hands open wide and desperate for Your presence…that is the way I am feeling today. Just waiting to come out blooming!…
yes, I love Chick-Fil-A!
We sing Your praise,O Lord
We give You all the glory,
We lift our hands in honor
for all You do,
We cry out Your Name,
Your presence is forever with us,
Your promises are righteous and true,
You give us everything that we will ever need,
We adore all You are and all You do,
You deserve our obedience and love,
Our lives a sacrifice to you,
You are the only One,
You are our Lord
You are the Holy One,
We love you.
You are only One,
We long for You. ~joyce
…sigh… I’m not sure if that’s a sigh of relief or one of heaviness. I’m going through some stuff…stuff that’s making me feel sticky and yucky and burdened. Ever felt that? But, I know…I believe I know…that God has His reasons. I also know that most of my feelings are due to others getting to witness my pruning. Can I admit that I hate that worse than a root canal? I know it’s pride and I know it’s foolishness, but it sure doesn’t feel like it when the pruning is going on. It keeps morphing into shame and condemnation and I know that’s NOT what God has for me.
I needed to be reminded and, I suppose, even reassured. I’m getting there and it’s HARD! …you can picture me kicking my pride with vehemence on that last sentence… 🙂
A happy side note: My oldest has worked part-time at Chick-Fil-A throughout his senior year of high-school and hopes to continue through college, since it’s so convenient! And while he would rather be run over with a 4 wheeler than eat more chicken, he lovingly brings them home to his Momma. He got to be the cow at a local school a few months ago. He loved it!
God knew I needed a word today and I thank you so much for letting Him use you to give it to me!
Wow!!! Did I need to hear that!! So much happening today, trying to practice His Presence without giving up. I felt as if I were with you wheeling in the parking lot. Thanks for sharing with us. I want to get her new cd for my shuffle, it sounds really good.
Love you Beth!
Thank you.
so needed that today, thanks.
SavedByGrace
ALL of that was beautiful and ENCOURAGING….thank you <3
I so needed to read this reminder today: “He always knows what He’s doing.” At the end of a day where a bad situation has just gotten worse, I need to remember that He Is In Control.
I’m so thankful for you, Beth! Thanks for sharing with us!
This touched my heart…my own daughters and granddaughter inspired a blog post I wrote yesterday. Your post today beautifully dovetails with my thoughts about them. Thank you for always caring about us and for sharing with us.
thank you beth! having a kind of discouraging day today – nothing horrible, but i think i am just doing too much and therefore not doing anything well. i want to do my best at everything i do and right now it seems there isn’t enough time in the day! i’m praying the Lord will help me prune away the things he doesn’t have for me right now. blessings dear beth!
Thanks for the reminder that pruning, though painful, is beneficial. As an Army wife who moves every 12-24 months, I know that I’ve got a pruning season coming. God has worked on me each move for the past three! And I’m moving again this summer 🙂 I love the last line of the song: “For Your joy and for Your glory falling.” I think I can use that to change my perspective about His workin’ on me!
Thank you.
You have taught me so much. I’ve done all of your Bible studies (a couple I have done twice) with the same core group of women since my first baby was 4 months old. She’s almost 13. I love your heart for Jesus and I absolutely love Him. Bless you Beth, your family, and your ministry. Our Bible study group of women have heard you speak twice and we’re hoping to see you in October in Long Beach. Can’t wait!
this was written just for me today… your words are echoey and close, and so so important.
Oh Ms Beth! How I needed this today! I am sooo tired! These nightly treks to the hospital 40 miles away to see Brian is getting so difficult. He continues to have these seizures and they are no closer to solving this mystery 3 wks out. He was totally normal 3 wks ago driving big heavy farm equipment and now he can not communicate with us. Our lives are on hold right now and suddenly it is like 30 yrs ago when Brian had Burkitts leukemia. He survived that miraculously and has done so well even though he has never married and lives with us. We may have to make the decision to have him placed in a nursing home and we have pleaded with God not to allow that to happen but that we obiedent to Him whatever the course may be. We get weary from the not knowing. The cancer may be coming back and that we may know in next days. How do you cope with such uncertainty? By leaning on Him first of all and the promises He gives and then on others who hold you and your loved ones up for prayer. I am grateful for all the Bibles studies I have done that I am drawing on now. Bless you Beth!!!
Oh Betty,
My heart breaks for you. Lord Jesus come minister to our sweet sister and bring her needed peace and rest. Give her an extra dose of joy and wisdom as she walks this journey! AMEN!
AMEN!!!
I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face after reading this post, Beth. Thank you so much for taking the time to write to us today. It was exactly what I needed to hear. (And I am going right out tomorrow morning and buy that album!).
God bless you,
Susan
That was such a good word. I sit here with tears in my eyes thinking of the pruning done in full view of others…thinking of the season of waiting…and rocked at the possibility that He is about to swing wide a new door in my life.
So humbled that He loves me and wants to use me!
She sang Revelation song Sunday morning at Passion City Church and oh my goodness I thought I was in heaven! She definitely has an amazing voice but her spirit is way sweeter!
I am at work but I am taking a break to read your latest blog post. Thanks for posting these words. I am really struggling right now. I have had the worst week at work last week and hope to shrug it off this week. I feel so awful lately. I am scared and feel so uneasy. I am forgetting to do things that I routinely do at work. I am so distracted most of the time. I blame it on years of trying to multi-task. As I read this blog I must confess that my “developed” ADD makes it hard to read every word, but I try. I saw the words “I just want to say to you today” and read carefully. But when I read “Don’t be discouraged. Don’t decide it can’t matter all that much.” Well I just broke down in tears. I have felt so worthless and had about decided that it just wasn’t worth it. Nothing I did really mattered. Thank you, thank you so very much!!! You have encouraged me to keep hanging in there. I am waiting for my season. Oh please Lord let it be soon!
Tammy,
You are worth it. Don’t despair. I am living proof that the Lord will bring you through it at THE perfect time. I’m glad you are “hanging in there”!
Siesta Barbara
Thank you Barbara!
Beth…I was thinking of you and your mention of how one of your mentors made you want to know God like they did…LOVE Him like they did. That is what you have done for me. Now I want people to know Him like I do…truly experience the relationship that is like none other. I find that when I try to encourage people in the faith…keep up the good fight… it just seems so often they would rather not hear it for some reason. You have reminded me that just like I DO want to hear it…need to hear it just like so many here on this blog, there will be some that also want to hear it when I am trying to encourage them. I have an enemy who would much rather I shut up. Thank you for the encouragement to keep encouraging!
Now THAT was a convoluted paragraph or so, huh?
God bless each and every one of you here!
Just beautiful! I’m going to have to download the song. Tears because I too am currently in such a sesason. This resonated with me so much. Thanks for the encouragement!
Beth,
Thanks for the beautiful post, what an amazing evening.
I am jealous of the Chick-Fil-A, my husband and I have chosen to drive an hour out of the way on a 14 hour/day road trip to make sure we could get some yummmmy nuggets. But now we are getting our own! 🙂
Great post!
Every time I come to the blog, it is right on time. God is weird like that. I love Him for it.. so much. I haven’t heard that song, but the lyrics are beautiful. I told Jesus today that I am holding on.. Holding on tight. So I will wait. Glad I have others to wait and hold on with.
I needed to hear this today. I live in a home with an abusive 14 year step-son. Recently, he busted down my bedroom door in a rage of anger. I was terrified and called the police. What could have been a wake-up call for him has been turned into totally false accusations against me resulting in charges against me. My husband is caught in the middle and I would never make him choose between the two of us. I have felt so much despair, fear, anger and still do. I have been ready to give up. BUT my season will come. God has a plan in this situation. I just can’t see it yet.
Thank you this post could not have come at a better time in my life going thru a ruff patch in my life since last Oct 2011 was looking up in Jan 2012 then I hit the ruff patch again, You have encoutage me to keep hanging on to my Savior and that my season is coming thank you for this post
I am praying that God will keep me faithful and strong thru this journey I am on.
Sorrow may last for the night buit joy will come in the morning. God must be getting ready to do some pruning in my life I happen to be listening to Christy Nockels this a.m. from Passion 2012 ( Waiting Here For You) My hands were held high sitting on the edge of my bed as tears streamed down my face and I told God I am waiting here for You.
Thank You Beth for all your ministry that you do and God bless you and LPM and your family
Carol
Should have been encourage me
But joy will come in the morning
I just saw my typo and decided to fix them
Thank you
Carol
I felt God’s arms wrapped around me and Mama Beth’s too. Felt so very good.
The first time I saw you on TV I had no idea who you were, but I was blown away by the beauty that radiated out of you – I’ve never seen anything like it, before or since. I said to the Lord, “I want what that woman has.” I hadn’t even heard you speak but I saw something mind-blowing, something of the Holy Spirit, all in and over you.
Thank you for this word for me today. I receive it in Jesus’ name.
Your words are precious to me today. Thank you.
This was such a great blog post. But, then again, I haven’t read a post on this blog I haven’t flat out LOVED. This one just made tears run down my cheeks, though. Thank you for always encouraging us and loving on us. It can get kind of scary out here in the world and so I’m thankful for you and this community. Bless you, Beth. You are a treasure.
What a beautiful song and what great words of encouragement. I can’t seem to put to words what my heart is saying – so I will just say ‘thank you’.