My man and I decided last night that we’d opt out of sleeping late like a holiday morning woos you to do and, instead, head about 30 minutes from our house to the country and watch the sun come up. Usually anything we do our dogs do with us but this time we decided to leave them at home, long-faced and dejected. Sometimes you just need to be alone and hear yourself think. Or take a long pause to see if you can remember why you liked each other. We made us some coffee on the way out the door and poured it in a small thermos. We grabbed a couple of lawn chairs and dragged them out to our favorite spot and sat without saying a single word. When you’ve been married as long as Keith and I, you come to expect that you’re going to have on seasons and off seasons and that, unless something’s going haywire, they’re neither one there to stay. My way of dealing with an off season is to talk it out and gnaw it like a bone into a toothpick till we’re back on or claim we are. Keith’s way is to run for his life and find the nearest dead zone for his cell phone. Both approaches have served us well enough. After all, we have raised two children to adulthood together and fallen head over heels in love with two grandbabies and have no plan at the present to see a lawyer. This time we just decided to do something new. Keith didn’t run and I didn’t talk.ย We just sat side by side in a pair of lawn chairs and listened to the woods.
I heard a lizard scurry over some dead leaves. Birds sang morning songs. Frogs croaked. The trees creaked and stretched like we woke them out of a dead slumber. A squirrel darted from branch to branch looking for breakfast to go. It reminded me of myself after about three cups of strong coffee. Everything else was moving slow and easy. Tiptoeing really. It was so quiet that I heard an oak leaf detach from a limb way over my head and I watched it fall to the ground in no big hurry at all. The morning sun glistened on the nocturnal masterpiece of a long-legged writing spider.
Wild lemons weighed down the branches of a small tree and just looking at one made the glands in my mouth squirt. It was too early for lemons, wild or otherwise.
Keith and I go to the country sometimes just to remind ourselves of things we have in common. So many of our likes and tastes aren’t only different. They scare the other half to death. They’d never take each other to lunch and, when we go, we have to go without them. We are reminded all the time that we met accidentally, naturally speaking, and married impulsively. But we both dearly love to be outside and to take really long walks and talk about almost nothing. This is one of our favorite spots on this particular country trail. It’s a clear little lazy creek that smiles in the sunshine but grows fangs in a storm, pulling trees from their roots. Maybe that’s Keith and me, too.
But, 31 years later, I still usually follow right after him. On level ground, he always takes the lead, especially on this country trail where the person in front has to swipe one spider web after another or wear them home. On mountain hikes, I take the lead because…well, because, that’s where I’m a beast. He claims it’s the altitude and that I can breathe thin air better than he. I choose to think I’m a hiking fiend…with a bad knee and a herniated disk. Right after this picture, I heard leaves cracking right at my feet as we stepped over an old rotted log. I glanced down expecting to see a big lizard and caught a solid, eye-popping stare at what my man claims to be the biggest copperhead he’s ever seen in his life. May it rest in peace. Lord, have mercy. I do not know why Keith Moore and I can’t seem to do life apart from snakes. It took about 15 minutes for my blood pressure to go back to normal.
When we got to this spot, Keith said, “Sit down over there, Liz’beth, and I’ll take your picture.” Dutiful wife that I am, I did. He’s just learning how to take a decent pic with my I-phone. He doesn’t really have fingertips and that’s what an I-phone takes. The ends of Keith’s fingers are more like manly stumps. He’s really cute when he’s trying though. Keith looks out of place with mini things. It’s not that he’s so big. He’s about 6 feet, 210 pounds. It’s just that his outside is upsized by his insides. Anyway, here’s his wife. She really doesn’t love early morning country humid hair but blogs are for the honest. Not for the proud.
One of our favorite things on this piece of Texas countryside is this old, broken down deer blind that marks the spot where one couple years ago commemorated their heavy crush with a can of spray paint. I don’t doubt it doubled as a kissing blind about that same time. About this time on our walk, my man and I were feeling a little less off. Sometimes all it takes to find some fresh affection is a willing recollection. Like B + K.
Well, thanks for taking a stroll with me, Sister. Don’t make anything serious out of this harmless chatter. When you’ve been married as long as we have and you have Moore feelings than normal, life is one big, wonderful, gnarly twisted knot of off and on again. But make no mistake. It’s a knot.
Wow! Thank you for sharing that today Beth, and letting us (me) know that we are all in the same boat on this journey called life and marriage. Also, that we are not so alone!! You have that gift of perfectly describing things I have been feeling, but can’t always take the time to stop and put words to–and it was a beautiful walk with you this morning, even in the evening when I read it. May God richly bless and favor our marriages! Praise God for times of quiet and stillness with Him and with each other.
Jen from Ohio.
When two can walk and not talk . . . that’s something so special. I love how your love of each other warms.
I loved every word (albeit those about coffee a little more than the ones about snakes. Just call me weird. ๐ ).
Beth,
I love how open and articulate you are! Thank you for taking time to share with us! Looking forward to Tuesday bible study!
Ann
I’m glad yours is a knot. Mine is, too. But it’s been a hard fought knot. It wasn’t by hap and chance. All the glue in our knot is Jesus and a bunch of pants with their knees worn off while He was being beseeched in prayer. My and my Honey’s knot is not for naught. Hopefully it’s for His glory.
Thanks for sharing a beautiful Texan morning with us. ~ And you will kindly keep your Copperheads way down yonder. I’ve got bears up here to contend with and I don’t need any slithery critters to keep me doubly paranoid (one level of paranoia being enough to suit me). On the topic of bruins: one was meandering through our neighborhood last week – one house away – full grown, massive grizzly bear. Heaven. Help. Me.
I love your honesty!!!
Hi Beth: I was just doing my homework for “A Heart Like His” study and the lesson that touched my heart was my where you talked about a 3 strand cord is not easily broken. How so very appropriate for todays post.
I’ve been married for 41 years and we too have had our ups and downs. Even being retired you still have to work at finding time to be with each other, but with our strands being bound to the Lord the strength of the three together keeps us together.
Thank you for being so honest and real for the rest of us to see. Good things are worth holding on to.
I love it. My hubs and I have been married for close to 11 years. 2 small children, a dog, cat, pair of birds, and some fish…we recall often the youthfulness love that drew us to the alter so quickly and at such a young age. I love him more today than I did on on wedding day. I didn’t have a clue…
Thank you for sharing.
Hi seista mama
You have a way with words the words you spoke just melted my heart. I am not married but your words still teach me how to do life. The pictures were just beautiful loved the one with your man walking ahead that was awesome. Love how you all are real with us it just makes me love you all more to know that your honest with us. I watched the 7th chapter video of breaking free this morning and I remember you saying something like you better be real or they will find you out eventually who you truly are, loved the video love the breaking free. I am glad that your man was watching over you and saw that copper head my sister in Florida they had been at her daughters and they were walking to the car and the water moccasin coiled up and jumped at her but it did not bite her I told her the Lord was watching over you. By the way loved the pic of you that Keith Moore took with your IPhone he did a great job.
Hope you have a nice evening
Love you all
Carol
Beth – Girlfriend – we are sisters separated only by miles. This post touched me right where I live and I know it’s because we are in the same season of life…same age, marriage, children, and grand-younguns. Even your “m.o” for dealing with the off seasons matches mine. Gary and I had a very similar day. He spent most of it in his John Deere clearing off some land on our farm, and I drug a lawn chair out there and just sat and watched him – brought him some tea and a pimento cheese sandwich. He got some of the cleared trees and underbrush to burning, and then we both sat and just watched it a while. We’ve been way too busy and sometimes when we get that way, we just have to get quiet to get back to center again.
Loved the picture of the American Beauty Berry. We have it growing wild all in our woods. And guess what? I took a picture with my cell phone the other day – and when I saw yours, I said again, we are sisters separated only by miles!
Thanks for the stroll. It will just have to “do,” until we can take a real-live stroll together.
Love you much,
Jan
A pimento cheese sandwich? I’m going to have to try this! I love how you Southern Siestas “do” food!! I’m guessing I’ll have to wait ’til heaven to eat grits (since no one up here knows how to make them, let alone what they are), but I’m pretty sure I can whip up a pimento sandwich!
Add some jalapeno’s to your pimiento cheese for an extra kick. ;0
Jill! YES! That’s what I’m talking about! You know it!
Sweet Warm in Alaska! You send me your address and I’ll mail you some grits AND also a note with how to fix (prepare) them!
Never had a pimento cheese sandwich? Oh.my.word. It is oh so good and homemade pimento cheese is even better.
Georgia Jan ๐
PS: Have you ever had peach cobbler? I posted step-by-step instructions with pictures if you’re interested!
http://granjansjoy.blogspot.com/2010/06/peach-cobbler.html
Jan, I have to say you just brought one of my favorite childhood memories to mind! I can remember my Mama making MANY pimento cheese sandwiches, usually for a church picnic or dinner on the grounds! I think I may need to make one!!!
I don’t think we have many snakes up here, at least not in my neighborhood. But just the other day I went to the state fair, which is less than 10 miles from my house, and when I was leaving, there was a snake right next to my truck. The only reason I noticed him was that he slithered away pretty quickly as I came up.
Good thing I’m not a screamer. I did suck in a bunch of air in a split second though. ๐
…just a very simple and heartfelt thank you. My hubby and I have been married 35 yrs. and I don’t know how we got here, and many days I don’t know how we will continue. Jesus gives me hope…and you give me hope. Thank you!
Thank you, sweet gal, for your honesty and transparency. We’re in our 24th year of marriage, and we’re experiencing more off than on right now…We need to work on pursuing and appreciating one another more. I appreciated hearing from one of my favorite people that it’s natural and normal for her too. Thanks.
thanks for sharing your morning, mama B. your ponderings and perspective are calming… life is life sometimes and that’s okay. it’s comforting to hear this from you as a motherly influence in my life… needed that today! i’m real glad the copperhead didn’t get the better of you. did you have your shotgun or did keith pick it off for you? love you dearly.
I love your honesty and have loved getting to know your heart through your bible studies. I thank God for your life and for the role you have played in my walk with Christ. Thank you for always pointing me back to Him.
This is a beautiful post and the picture of you is stunning.
God bless you, Beth.
In the mountains at our cabin in Colorado “Where my man loves me most” (Beth Moore)! Two boys 16 years of school combined, last one graduated in June and is at his dream school playing baseball. God is good. This season is new for us. No kids here this time, definitely no grandkids, nobody except us. Interesting….sweet…..aggravating….sweet…..lonely….sweet…..we are vascillating but we are a tightly tied knot and we are thankful for this new season. Thanks Beth for reminding me that this is life! Love it and love your man even when you can’t make up your mind what you are!
Keeping it real,
Theresa
Thanks, Theresa – loved how you said it: the hard mixed in with the sweet.
Warm in Alaska…don’t you know it! Thanks for your encouragement!
and another thing…I hate to rub it in but in these parts there is nothing but great hair days ahead!
AMEN!
More couples should follow the “Moore couple” in doing simple things like this together.
Marilyn…in Mississippi
We met while we were in the army stationed in Germany. We were married twice once in Germany at the chapel and then in Denmark for the paperwork. My husband and I had our honeymoon in Garmish,Germany where the Alps were. It was like a fairytale, it was a dream come true. Only God could have planned it so well.
A few months later we went to Ft.Stewart, Georgia where we helped at the Service men’s center and I finished my three years in the army. We stayed there for one year before returning to Germany, where I had my twin boys. We visited Holland where Corrie Ten Boon lived and we also visited some missionaries there.
We loved taking walks and train rides in Germany. The country side was beautiful. The Alps is so pretty.
Here in Oklahoma, we go out to the Witchita Mountains and walk. But, I really love Davis, Oklahoma at the women’s retreat area Falls Creek_the mountains and water falls are really peaceful and quiet.
Beth,
This was beautiful in every sense- its one those moments where no artist could possibly make a painting of, or the greatest writer couldn’t write a poem about…moments like that, only God can paint and write the story:)
Thank you for sharing:)
xoxo
angie
Oh mama beth,
I so needed this. It touched my heart. My dear hubby and I have been married 19 years but this week was a doozy. I am organized, he is not and my mind can’t comprehend “flying by the seat of your pants” for a trip that comes around every year at the same time. Needless to say we fought. I like to talk, he would rather run for the hills. But God always manages to find a way for us to just be still and I am so thankful for that. I m waiting on him to get home from his trip and made cookies for him. I figure that going straight to his stomach was a good start at a peace offering.
Thanks for being so real with us siestas.
love you
Great post…and yes, marriage is like knot. We’re still waiting on that marriage Bible study one day. ๐
I cringe every time I think of that coral snake you came across. And now wonder why I have a fear of hiking in the summer time in Texas! I’m the kinda girl that jingles her keys the whole hike to scare away bears. I wish that would work for snakes, too.
God blessed us with an unexpected way of reconnecting this weekend. Married nearly eight years with a 19 month old, the best way for us to reconnect is to say ‘bye-bye’ to the baby and have some time by ourselves, some quiet. My hubby and I have been sick and so my dear parents offered to take Brennan so we could rest up. Little did we know it, but we also needed some time to reconnect and just talk and laugh and be together. We’re grateful for times to strengthen that knot!
Beth, thanks so much for posting this. Made me feel normal. Ha! Love the pictures. I’ve been looking for a beautiful landscape to paint and I think this one is it. The colors are magnificent.
On the other hand, just the mention of a snake makes me squirm. So did Keith chop the head off or what? A picture would have been great though! I live in TX too and the snake stories seem to be multiplying. Oh please Lord, I don’t want a snake story!
Thank you for always keeping it real and for sharing your heart with us. You have no idea how I needed to read this post today. You have such a gift for expressing wisdom and making me laugh all at the same time.
Thank you for sharing, Siesta Mama! I needed to hear this today. As newlyweds just out of our first year of marriage, we’ve realized a lot about our differences over the past year. We’re still working on how to figure those things out … and to appreciate more and more God’s sovereignty in putting us together. Our small group leader is challenging us to look at those differences as ways that we will challenge each other and God will grow us. Humbling to think that God will use all the “junk” to make us more like Him!
Thanks for this beautiful post…Came at just the perfect time…We just celebrated 38 years…and most days all is good, but this has been an off week..If there is another soul on earth that has a more beautiful gift of words and heart, I have missed them..Thanks for always being real..It lets me know real is OK. My blood pressure is still up just thinking about the snake being near our Bible Study teacher.
Love you,
Teresa
My husband and I of one year and 2 1/2 months had a similar kind of morning! Woke up early, stopped in at our favorite place in the world…Starbucks, of course, and took a stroll along the beach pier… in the rain. It was cold and wet but the time together with no distractions was worth it! I love those times…we sure do need them in marriage, don’t we? Thank you Beth for your authenticity and honesty…it is so refreshing! I pray that all of you ladies had a wonderfully blessed holiday.
Beth, I am so thankful you are honest and share like you do. My husband and I are in a difficult season right now with having had our 2nd child in April and getting used to being a family of four. Plus, the new baby is having major surgery one month from today and life just seems crazy right now. Thank you for the reminder that sometimes the best remedy is to just sit next to the one you love and let the hearts do the talking. I thank God for you and your ministry!
I love your honesty about your relationship with your husband. I will celebrate 30 years with mine in a week, if we don’t kill each other first. ๐
Thanks for sharing your real, honest life with us. Love the pictures.
Thank you so much for your honesty Beth. You are such an amazing woman of God, and it is easy to look at your life and envy it, envy your level of faith, your clear ocnnection to God, and the way you allow the Holy Spirit to work through you as you teach others. It is very brave of you to share your struggles and though I’m divorced now I really admire your openness on this. I will pray for you two to find the “on” phase again because I know that’s so much kinder on one’s heart and soul, but also to fnd the lesson and the blessing in the challenge and the knot. God bless you! Because I know you bless God ๐
So beautiful and so real. This post gave me an idea to get my 32 year marriage back on!
Thanks for your thoughts. My man & I celebrated 31 years together this past August. It’s a long time but I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Thanks. You’re sweet.
Hmmmm. Love it.
Your honesty brings beauty, joy and hope! Thanks for “keepin it real!”
What a beautiful post! This is real life, real marriage and real relationships. We love you Beth…simply for being real. Thank you for trusting us and being so vulnerable.
Beth,
Thank you for sharing. My husband and I have been married 31 years as well and like you, I thought I would be a lawyer in college, so I have the gift of good debating and my man is quiet. We have a daughter and grandson that live with us who went off for the long weekend so we had the experience of empty nesting. Boy, is it quiet! My husband and I are so different, but we like to take long car rides just looking around, so that’s what we did. It’s funny but in a marriage study we attended the author tells women that men share most intimately when seated side by side instead of face to face. So us in our car, and you in your chairs in the country:)
Oh Beth, that is why we all love you and your teaching, cause you are just so darn honest about everything. so many “teachers” are not these days and you are a breath of fresh air. My husband is Jim but we have the same last name AND the best part is we have a daughter named Beth Moore !!!!!!! everyone aways teases me that I know Beth Moore personally !!!! we will have our 34th anniversary on Oct. 2nd. I know exactly what you are saying. GOD BLESS you both !!!!!
Love and prayers
Ginny
Precious.
You are beautiful, Ms. Beth, and I love you.
๐
Hilary
Dearest Beth,
As I read your post, my heart became so very heavy. Don’t misunderstand me, I thrill
to hear that you and your man are able to take a long walk together and reconnect
again. Being able to do so is vital in a marriage. My heart is heavy because the ability to reconnect with my husband just wasn’t to be, even though that is what I prayed for year after each, long year. It was always my desire, but not his. Now, after 26 years of marriage and four amazing, grown (Praise God!!) children, he decided to have a year long affair with my close friend (not!), divorce me and marry her. The “discovery”, separation, divorce, and his remarriage has all taken place in nine short months. The Lord has surrounded me with a pastoral staff and friends that have gone beyond the Biblical mandate to pursue the “fallen” brother and sister in an attempt to bring them to a place of repentance, but to no avail. I LOVE the Body of Christ!
Within two months of everything “hitting the fan”, the women of our church began the “When Godly People Do Ungodly Things” study. Amazing! I believe it was that study that helped me begin the process of forgiveness. My heart has been deeply wounded and there are absolutely no words to describe the pain, but I know that my savior lives and He is in the business of restoring what the locusts have eaten. YES!
Beth, I too, thank you for your transparency. I pray that the Lord will deepen your love for one another, beyond all that you could ever imagine!
Pressing In,
Tracy
Oh dear Tracy, my heart breaks for you and the pain you are going through. May you feel Jesus’ arms around you through the support of your friends and church family. I will pray for you right now.
Love,
Karene
Karene,
Thank you so much!
Blessings,
Tracu
Love this! I had some similar thoughts on Saturday morning as the man and I ran together. He’s helping me train for my first 1/2 marathon. (I’ve never been a runner. BUT, he asked me to do this with him and I thought that after 16 years of marriage I would shock him. I didn’t expect to love it so much.) Anyway, we were at my in-laws over the weekend. They are just a few minutes from the ocean. SO, I did my first 5 mile run with my husband on the beach. Tears for most of the run thinking about all we have come through. So thankful for him and for the first time, for our differences. I’m glad we said for keeps.
We have the same marriage, just different people, I think! Totally different interests and personalities, but 34 year later, we are still “knotted”!
Love you!
Elizabeth
http://www.justfollowingjesus.com
I tell you! I can’t count the times the scripture in Ecc has encouraged my soul. “A cord of 3 strands is not quickly broken.” Thank you God for being that third strand that exponentially increases the strength of our rope. Our unity in the good times and the hard times is attributed to your glory alone~
Thanks for keeping it authentic and real Beth!
Jina
Reminds me of the verse:
How can two walk together unless they agree?
Nice to know the two of you can “walk out” your troubles, always knowing that the two of you agree in what counts…..faith in our Savior!
So… my favorite picture was the third one down and by the way I had never saw a lemon tree. I love it when you post pictures. Now, I’m sorta confused about that snake was it dead or did Keith kill it? I guess we will have to start praying that God will protect you from the wild animals snakes and bears and what else is up there? I’m glad you had a great day and I love you bunches my sweet moma!!!
That’s what I LOVE about you the most! You’re just like us and not afraid to tell us so! I, too have been with my man for 38+ years! We have some on-again-off-again days (mostly on-days). We, too love the country side and walking through God’s glorious creation to talk it out or not!
Looking SO FORWARD TO TUESDAY NIGHT!!! See you there and expecting God to show us His Glory!
Mammy
My man and I are a bit behind you in years of marriage.(We will celebrate 20 years next month). He is the strong silent type, and I am quite the talker. I realize that we have had our seasons, but I can’t say that we have had them at the same time. I kind of feel like we have just been on an even keel for most of these years. I guess we’re boring. We have always been able to talk about anything with each other. I wigged out a couple years ago when my brother-in-law and sister-in-law got divorced. They were very good actors and I hadn’t realized anything was wrong. That made me paranoid for a while that if it could happen to them, it could happen to us. He let me vent and talk things through and that helped a lot.
We have started going out for breakfast most Saturday mornings, and we just enjoy walking through a store or sitting in the same room together.(I know, boring, right?) It gives me confidence that when our girls leave the nest we will be okay with just the two of us again. It sounds like you had a great morning! We spent the day with family, nothing special, the guys played a video game in the basement while the women played “Imagineif” upstairs while their 3 dogs watched. It is a hilarious game if you ever need some belly laughs! Still praying for all of you! Especially Amanda as she prepares for her trip this week! Love you all!