Recently I had dinner with a new friend. We discussed all things ministry, church, worship, and dating over some delicious margarita pizza. For a first time get together, we hit it off pretty easily. That’s a blessing in itself because you never know if your first time meeting up with someone is going to be painfully long and awkward, or easy and refreshing. I left feeling refreshed and grateful for the handful of new friends the Lord has blessed me with over the past year and a half.

Among our other topics of conversation, she asked me about mentoring young girls. Basically, she was curious what I had seen work and what hadn’t in my short time in ministry. While I love this question, and actually receive that exact question in my email inbox often, I liken it to parenting. (Since I’m a parent and all, you know.) I’m no expert whatsoever, but I’ve learned that there is no formula, and the experience is different for everyone. However, over the few short years I’ve had the privilege to mentor some young girls, there are a few things that have never fallen short. Because I’m always looking for ideas, and because I don’t mind sharing what I’ve seen be effective, I thought what better way to share than to post a blog.

I know for a fact many of you are doing the thing and have the same question!

I am curious, however, how many of you out there specifically work with high school girls? Whether it be by volunteering at your church or an organization, or those of you who might be on staff at a church serving in some type of girls ministry role. So, let’s consider this post a roll call, a little advice, and a place to give ideas. How does that sound? (Of course, these ideas can really be applied to any mentoring relationship.)

I’ll start by sharing what’s worked for me:

1) Be Real:

I don’t know if you know this, but you may think because of their young age that girls don’t pick up on if you’re faking it or not. But I’m telling you, they know. They pick up on it. They can smell a fake a mile away and they want nothing to do with it. So what does this mean? It means that although you might be their mentor and they the mentee, they want to know you! They want to know that you are not perfect. That you do not have it all together. That you sin. That you don’t always spend an hour in the word each morning. That you get mad and irritated with your family. That you have friend issues. That you are struggling to survive just like them. It means you speak these things to them. Obviously, there is wisdom and discretion in what you share and to what extent and how many details, but that doesn’t mean you can’t own up to your crud, too. It takes two to tango. Take that rare opportunity to learn from them as well!

2) Ask Questions: (Ask hard questions!)

How are you? That’s a very vague and empty question. A question anyone can hide behind. I have learned over the years that the more specific the question, the better and more effective. This actually took me a while to learn and ironically, one girl that I dearly love was always so annoyed when I asked this question that she would ask me what I meant and what did I really want to know? I’m so grateful for her honesty because it broadened my horizon of questions. Asking the hard questions is also vital, because who else is doing it? I think sometimes we don’t want to ask the hard questions because that can get messy, but discipleship is messy. To throw some conversations starters out there, here are some good questions:

– How is your relationship with your friends? Is there any drama or gossip that you need to set straight? (If you have or know a high school girl, I can almost promise you there will be drama of some sort.)
– How is your relationship with your parents? Siblings?
– How is school?
– How is your relationship with your boyfriend? Who’s holding you accountable? What are your boundaries?
– What Bible study are you doing right now?
– Are you harboring any sin? Struggling in secret in any way?

3) Never FORCE them to talk:

While you are there to mentor them, hold them accountable and be real with them, there is nothing worse than someone forcing you to talk. I promise you, over time, they’ll say what they need to say when the Lord gives them the grace to do it. Gently encourage them, for sure, but don’t ever make them feel threatened.

4) Create Safety:

Each girl needs to know that you are a safe person. They need to trust you. Trusting someone takes time, especially if you’re starting this relationship from scratch. This means they are free to tell you anything with zero judgment or condemnation, only grace and love. This goes hand in hand with sharing your life as well. The more you share, the less perfect you are to them, the greater the chances of them opening up to you.

5) Go through a book together:

Sometimes as a high school girl, an older mentor whether it be in college, just out of college or older, can be intimidating. Because of the intimidation, they’re less likely to speak up and just be themselves around you. The book you read together gives you an opportunity to approach certain conversations or topics that could otherwise be awkward or just plain hard. Your book can be your guide. Some great resources for you would be your youth pastor, LifeWay or even Christian Book Distributors.

6) Know what teenage girls struggle with:

This may seem like common sense, but we have to know what we’re dealing with here, what our target audience is. We have to be in the know. While you were once a teenager and have struggled with similar things, because of the rapid speed of technology and the effect it’s had on the way we do things, we need to understand their world. You can be certain a few sensitive areas include: identity, body issues, friendships, dating, family, faith, and all things dealing with relationships whether it be emotional, mental, or sexual. And while we’re at it, you can certainly add in communication these days. How in the world do they communicate besides instant messaging, texting, and any online chatting? It’s a big world out there.

7) Pray with them:

Don’t just pray for them, pray with them. Have you ever denied prayer? I know we all want it and need it, but unfortunately, something about praying out loud for someone on the spot scares us. However, although I sometimes felt awkward as a young girl, nothing meant more to me than the ladies that never let me leave their sight without praying for me. Not only does this teach them how to pray, how to love and what it looks like to be discipled, it also gives them a chance to receive that prayer and those blessings first hand and to hear what you are praying. There is power in prayer. There is power in praying out loud. And there is certainly power in praying with the girls.

8) Listen to them:

This may be the most redundant of all to you, but in all seriousness, the more you give them the time of day and listen to what may seem mundane to you, the more they’ll be willing to tell you. Listen, no one is going to open up to you until they know you care. And not just that you care about the hard, serious things, but that you care about the homework they loathe, and their favorite place to shop. The more you genuinely hear them out without cutting them off, the farther your relationship will go.

9) Do things with them:

One really great way to build a strong relationship is to just do everyday life with them. Go see a movie, take them grocery shopping with you, go shopping together, invite them over for dinner with your family, hang out at the pool, and so on and so forth. It doesn’t always have to be a formal one-on-one get together. In fact, it’s in the “mundane” that real life and real discipleship happens. This is also a really great way for them to see a peak into your real life.

It looks so easy on paper, but mentoring, discipling, however you want to label it is easier said than done. But we were called to make disciples, each and every one of us. I’d love to hear from you guys. Y’all are a wealth of wisdom! What are some things you’ve seen work for you?

Oh, and for a little encouragement, there is truly nothing like investing your time in a young girl, only to watch her go off to college and do the same to the younger girls around her. The Lord doesn’t always allow us to see the fruit of our labor, but when He does, it’s the sweetest, most rewarding gift ever. Your investment will be worth it, dear friend. Do not grow weary in doing good!

Last week after getting my wisdom teeth removed, plus one added bonus, making it a total of five teeth, I got a little frantic as suddenly I felt one of my stitches loosening up. It had only been five days since my surgery, and I had been told and read that most stitches last at least seven to ten days. Hence my anxiety. Much like this paragraph might be TMI for you, I then proceeded to call my doctor and explain in full detail what was going on in my mouth. I know y’all, it’s disturbing. I do apologize. But it could be so much worse. Relief flooded me when the nurse told me that was very normal and I was okay. Oh, and while I was at it, to eat something more than just Slim Fast. Not only was I relieved, but also I was ecstatic, because well, food. Need I say more? I was starving for something solid.

Ironically, the next morning I had a different doctors appointment where I proceeded to spill my guts and ask every question in the book about all sorts of things. I left that appointment with answers and feeling very secure for the path that lay ahead of me.

I also felt very humbled.

Other than a counselor, and maybe your spouse, who else do you feel complete freedom with to ask some of the most bizarre questions, and not only that, but share what others would label as WAY to much information, besides a doctor?

But the truth is, if you really want to get well, or fix something that is broken, you have to be 100% transparent with your doctor and do everything they tell you to get well. And last I checked, I think we’re all into the getting well business. Who likes to be sick, broken and messed up? It’s no way to live abundantly.

You see, I would be what you might consider the perfect patient.

Anyone, eh hem, my mother and best friend, could testify to this.

For instance, as I mentioned, I had my wisdom teeth removed. Upon leaving the doctors office after your surgery, they give you a sheet of paper along with your prescription medications explaining the step-by-step process on how to heal the quickest and easiest. The minute I was out of my coma to a place I could actually comprehend what I was reading, I poured over that sheet front and back, word for word.

Not only did I nearly memorize every word, I also did what it said. It was, in fact, the only way to get well.

When I got off the phone with the doctor the other day I kind of chuckled to myself as I thought about all doctors and nurses have to go through. They see the good, the bad and the very, very ugly. I realize I’m no nurse, but I happen to have a nurse as a roommate, and let me tell you, she and I lead very different day jobs.

Because my mind never sits in one place, I immediately thought of how this affects our relationship with God. The degree to which we’ll be honest with Him about our deep messes, our brokenness and intense struggles (as if He isn’t already intimately acquainted with every detail), is the degree to which we’ll be healed.

And the degree to which we’ll do what He tells us to do to trash the trash in our lives, also holds some weight. Sometimes we know exactly what to do to get well, but we’re just stubborn enough not to do it. Yet, He says He’s given us everything we need for life and godliness. Not that we would get caught up in just following the rules, but that we would get caught up in the grace offered to us.

“His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.” 2 Peter 1:3-4

Mercy, what messes we are all in. Not one of us is immune and not one of us is perfect. This is both good news and bad news! Because none of us is immune to any pit of sin means we need Jesus in the worst way, but because none of us will attain perfection here on earth means we can cut one another a little slack. It also means for those of us perfectionists, to take a chill pill. Or, for those of us holding someone to a perfect standard, to take them off the high horse we’ve put them on.

I’m far from being any type of scholar, but naturally I thought of the healing at the pool that Jesus performed.

“After this there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. Now there is in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate a pool, in Aramaic called Bethesda, which has five roofed colonnades. In these lay a multitude of invalids—blind, lame, and paralyzed. One man was there who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had already been there a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to be healed?” The sick man answered him, “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.” Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” And at once the man was healed, and he took up his bed and walked.” John 5:1-9 (ESV)

I’m not going to pretend I know all the history of all that went on here, but can we all agree that thirty-eight years is a long time? I realize that some of us are bound up for much longer than that, but isn’t it exhausting?

I may have grown up in church, but I can assure you I didn’t even begin to think about grabbing onto some healing until I was 18 and a senior in high school. And it wasn’t for the lack of people encouraging me, pointing me towards truth and loving on me. It was because of my own pride, and the fact that I liked my sin. It felt good. I can’t imagine an invalid feeling good, but I can imagine getting too lazy in our sin that we never want to get up and move on, because if any of us have tried, we can testify that it is h-a-r-d.

Notice that after Jesus asked him if he wanted healing, he didn’t even say yes! He gave an excuse as to why he was still laying there.

Is that not so true of us? We can think of every excuse in the book as to why our healing has yet to come to us. As to why we’re still drowning in sin. Or why that stronghold still holds all the power in the world over us.

“I have no one to help me…” who are we waiting for? Who are you waiting for? What is that one thing you think can heal you? Sister, stop waiting. His name is Jesus.

That brokenness, that shame, that addiction, the mindset, that sin cycle, that stronghold, that lie, that greed, that lust, that past, that hate. He came for that. Our excuses, though they may seem legitimate at the time, are illegitimate.

“Get up, take up your bed and walk!” Today is the day.

If it seems impossible, it might be, but the Lord knows your fears. Knows how painful it might be. But He’s still telling you to get up and walk! Walk free! Walk confidently! Maybe it’s time to stop asking God for some healing and believe He’s granted us the freedom. The freedom He gave us on the cross.

Or maybe you have yet to even ask the Lord for some freedom, but you’re dying for some! Today is the day to ask! Tell Him every single detail. What may seem insignificant to you, is not to Him.

Some of us need to let God simply demonstrate His power through us.

He is trustworthy. He cares. He sees. He loves.

And ultimately, He heals.

Walk on, Sister.

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. Romans 8:1-2 (ESV)

I’m curious how many of you are singing the next lines to the song posted above, “wish it was Sunday…”. Makes me laugh!

Truth be told, Sunday is easily one of my favorite days of the week, and Monday one of the hardest. I have the great honor and privilege of getting to sing on our worship team at church, and since we added an evening service a few months ago, that means that the weeks I’m serving, I’m liable to be at church all day. Listen, this isn’t me complaining in the least, I am so delighted and happy to do it, and consider it a great honor, but it certainly zaps me of some energy come Monday morning.

Hence the manic Monday. I’ve been known to leave my house on a Monday morning headed to work only to realize I left my computer sitting on my coffee table. And well, that’s kind of a necessity. I may or may not have done that this morning. Sigh.

Anyway, as I often do, I was scrolling through my phone last night deleting the masses of unnecessary pictures I have stored on there, when I decided an iPhone dump for this Monday was in order.

For the record, our sweet Siesta Mama has a very full plate right now, you wouldn’t waste a prayer on her at all, so I’ll do the best I can to hold down the fort while she works to serve you all in a different capacity. So, I do apologize in advance if you get tired of hearing from me! But rest assured, she will hop on when she can.

Without further do, a little Monday randomness for you.

Every other Thursday night I’m taking a small group of girls through “Believing God”. I’m so proud of them for coming because that study is hard! Especially as a high school girl. But what makes me happiest is when they say their five statement pledge of faith at the beginning of each week. I wanted to capture this so I’d remember it! Oh, if they just got those five truths at that age. Such liberating truth!

Remember that time I confessed to y’all that I unintentionally rub my feet together when I’m really tired? And then I confessed I remind myself of a cricket. Well, KMac, my beloved coworker found this pillow at a little shop right after that. You guessed it. This pillow now sits on my bed. I love it.

We’ve had our fair share of interesting visitors here at LPM, but most recently, we’ve welcomed a crane. It’s slightly bizarre, but we are all very intrigued. I’m not quite sure what he thinks about us, though.

My friend recently texted me this picture. For the sake of all embarrassment, yes, this is my hysterical, typical laugh. I’d label myself an unattractive laugher. But seriously, life is good when you’re laughing this hard!

My  sweet mom and I at a wedding recently. This was the photo booth! How fun is that? I’d just like to give a shout out and say that moms are the best nurses. Remember how I told y’all recently I needed to have my wisdom teeth removed? Well, I did it a little over a week ago and I survived! Praise the Lord! This was all largely because she took such good care of me afterwards. I’m thankful.

Speaking of wisdom teeth, you know you’ve arrived when you get snail mail from a four-year old. My favorite get well card of all time.

One of my favorite things about my church is all the young families. I love getting to spend time with them and their precious kiddos. Truly, not much brings me as much joy as getting to do just that. Anyway, this was my placemat for dinner one night. It made me so unbelievably happy!

I recently had to make a little drive to the country. Apparently, that’s where road signs don’t matter. “No Motor Vehicles”. Funny.

One fun thing about roommates is that it means you can take random midnight trips to the grocery store. This particular evening was one for the books. Oh, and in case you were curious, I’m kind of obsessed with apples. Hence the delight in this picture. My roommates just go along with it.

LPM is in it to end it! For more information on what that means click here.

Since I don’t have babies of my own to brag about, I choose to brag about my BFF’s baby. For my recent trip to Austin for a wedding, Ellie was my car buddy. Tell me, is this not the best three hour view? She’s scrumptious.

That wedding I keep referring to was a for a dear friend I’ve known since birth. It was a beautiful wedding! And one of the most unique weddings I’ve attended for sure. Everything was so Brittany. Anyway, ten years ago this year the brides daddy passed away. The most bittersweet thing was watching her older brother give her away at her wedding. Not a dry eye!

Oh, and speaking of Ellie, I had her all to myself Friday night while her parents had a date night. She makes me so deliriously happy. We played and played before bed time. This is us. She was more interested in eating my phone. But what nine month old isn’t? This is pre-bed time.

After an hour of off and on giggling, talking and fussing in bed, she decided play time was more fun. So played we did. Needless to say, contrary to “Goodnight Gorilla” that girl was not ready for goodnight. Not that I minded. Party time with Aunt Lou! We were both happy.

Houston has had amazing, yet unique weather for the month of May. I keep imagining I live in California, because that’s what our weather has been like. Perfection, if you ask me. Because of the weather, I’ve gone on as many walks as possible at a trail near me. Normally, I might go for a run, but seriously, who would ruin this weather with a run! I convinced my roommate to go with me one Friday evening. Clearly, we both enjoyed it.

Sometimes you go for a walk and you stumble upon a treasure.

You have to cherish every minute of these Houston weather days. Also, I’m apparently into bridges. Awesome.

Yesterday I had a different viewpoint at church than I typically do. I took this shot during our last worship song. Honestly, words can’t describe how grateful I am for my church. I’m glad the Lord has planted me there for such a time as this. It blesses my soul.

Y’all have a happy Monday!

For those of you who feared we might not post the LPL Eugene recap, no worries! We’re just doing a little shake up here on the blog this week. Grin.

Beth did a wonderful job of summing up the weekend in the previous post, so I’ll just let the video speak for itself.

Living Proof Live | Eugene from LifeWay Women on Vimeo.

We hope y’all have a wonderful weekend! Shockingly, on May 3rd, it’s a chilly 58 degrees here today in Houston. I’m not completely sure, but we might be breaking a record low for Houston this late in the spring. But lest you think we’re complaining, we’ll take it! Scorching temps are just around the corner.

Oh, and for your viewing, or rather, laughing pleasure, you all need to know I’ve reached a new low. Our sweet Beth brought some leftover cake to the office on Wednesday, so I decided to serve myself a piece yesterday afternoon for a little snack. However, I didn’t realize until I got back to my office that I had served it on my upside-down plate. No wonder the plate felt so unstable! I was beyond tickled. THAT’S how easily entertained I am. I hope you are, too! Bless my heart.

Happy weekend, y’all!

Sometimes I’m stunned by one’s ability to sum up something so profound in so little words; and not only that, a statement that holds so much weight and truth. With twitter’s 140-character limit, I’ve slowly learned and had to work at summing up simple thoughts, which has been a wonderful challenge for me personally.

Comparison, if you think about it, really is the thief of joy.

Thank you, Theodore Roosevelt.

He was tweeting before twitter ever existed.

Comparison, over the years, has changed its game. Where as we used to compare ourselves literally in person and face to face, we now compare ourselves not only in face to face situations, but on top of that, we’ve added the wide world of social media to compare literally everything.

A few weeks ago before Beth posted this profound blog about doing the thing we’re called to do, she asked me if I had anything for the blog that day cause if not, she had a word pressing and wanted to share it. (We make sure not to double up. Awkward!) Of course I told her to go ahead because I was in the middle of working on a post, but it was far from presentable.

I actually didn’t read her post until later that night, but it stopped me dead in my tracks because, although she wouldn’t have known what I was in the middle of writing about, our posts were very similar. I shot her a quick text to tell her that her post was amazing and indeed, needed, and then explained that the one I said I had been working on but wasn’t ready yet, was one about comparing our lives to everyone else’s via social media. She was gracious as she always is and was afraid that her post might have in some way ruined mine, but I assured her that wasn’t the case.

Ironically, the longer I thought about it, I decided I might as well not even post this blog, because, you guessed it, hers was way better than mine and obviously fitly spoken, but then it dawned on me, that’s exactly what I was talking about. Comparing our lives via the ever so brilliant social media. If the Lord had given me the words to type, then I would be disobedient not to post for fear that it wasn’t as well received. Or for fear that, comparatively, hers was way better. What an ugly truth I kept telling myself.

What I was about to keep from posting was the very thing I felt like sharing.

I think it’s obvious that I need this word more than anyone.

Allow me to explain.

We live in a generation that is more connected than ever, and for the record, over-stimulated, yet lonelier than ever. I know that is old news to most of us, but it is our current reality and every now and then, I think it’s appropriate to revisit.

Not only do I see it in the young girls I work with, I see it as being prevalent among all generations. Most of us, if we were being honest, have been sucked into the vortex that is social media.

Before we go any further, you need to know that I’m game for all things social media. I love it. It is, in fact, a part of job title here at LPM. I don’t just love it, I’m swimming in the deep end.

With that said, a few weeks ago as I was getting a pedicure, I picked up one of the magazines sitting on the table next to me and happened to flip right to a short article explaining that those who spend more time perusing facebook tend to be more depressed than those who don’t.

I may have gasped audibly and even said under my breath, “Well, duh!” because to me, that made perfect sense.

What we otherwise would have known nothing about 10 years ago, we are experts on now.

Experts on what? On how other folks are living their life and what we’re missing out on.

For goodness sake, it can be even really good things that can become distorted to us.

Say for instance a string a tweets or facebook status updates that took place from a handful of members from a certain church. (Hear me loud and clear, I’m using this example because I have done it. I did it. I am doing it.) You may love your church, but reading those updates you may get a sense of discontentment from your church. All the sudden you may get the feeling that your worship isn’t good enough. The teaching is mediocre. Childcare is iffy. Your church will never measure up! What a lie! When in reality, our church could just have more tweeters than yours. (What a weird sentence to write!)

Maybe you become aware of a party or gathering that was blasted on social media that you didn’t get invited to.

Maybe you couldn’t attend a certain conference for one reason or another, so instead of enjoying your weekend, you spend countless hours on twitter reading every last tweet and throwing yourself a pity party. FOMO, the fear of missing out, has you handicapped.

Maybe you find out from facebook that your ex-boyfriend is not only dating somebody, but is now engaged and getting married in three months.

Or how about your twitter followers? How often do we compare our number of followers to our friends? Why is this person following so-and-so and not me? And boom, they unfollow me, so I unfollow them. You just got served. Or better yet, it becomes a popularity contest throwing us back to the middle school years. We start to evaluate who’s in the “in” crowd and who’s not. I don’t know about you, but I want to leave my middle school years in their rightful place, and that is in the past.

Forget followers, let’s just talk about twitter replies. Can I say something that gave me so much freedom? You and I have the right and freedom to respond to whomever on twitter. I think some of us feel an obligation to respond and converse with the millions on twitter, but can we all give each other a little slack and be free? Can we not get jealous when someone gets a reply and we don’t? Even typing that out sounds so unbelievably silly. But you and I both know it’s the sad reality and truth. If any of us have struggled with people pleasing (hand raised!), we can get stuck in trap where we now feel the obligation to people please online as well. Oh, the pressure!

Or, to throw it out there, how about “likes” on Instagram. That alone could throw us for a loop if we think we’ve posted the best or cutest picture ever and it only gets 18 likes. Or maybe we’re so in it for the attention that we spend more time instagramming and less time socializing.

Do you see how we’ve become hyper-aware of what we’re lacking, or what we think we’re lacking? We’re setting ourselves up for failure and rejection and the fact that we all know that social media isn’t going anywhere, and in fact, only growing, means that we have to learn what our personal balance is. Things we never would have known about, and nor probably even cared about ten years ago are throwing us into a pit of despair. A pit of loneliness. A pit of discontentment. Nothing will snatch our identity in Christ from us quicker than comparison.

One thing I’ve discovered, and maybe it’s just me, is that I tend to interact more on social media with those I’m not interacting with face to face. Now, in some cases that’s not true, like say for example when my BFF posts a picture of her baby, it’s everything in me not to like it 100 times and retweet it to the entire universe. And by all means, I love a good joke or word of encouragement to a friend on twitter, but most times, when I send a tweet, I am choosing to interact with a world of people I do not know personally, all the while expecting them to care and respond like we’ve been friends for 15 years.

As if rejection doesn’t take a serious toll on a human being as it is, we’ve now added another dimension. I’m almost tempted to call it imaginary rejection. Rejected by those we’ve never even met. Nor talk to on a normal, consistent basis.

With comparison comes jealousy and I’m not sure anything steals your joy quicker than feeling jealous.

I read a quote by Steven Furtick recently, the pastor of Elevation Church, that said, ““One of the reasons we struggle with insecurity is because we’re comparing our ‘behind the scenes’ with everybody else’s ‘highlight reel.’”

Although I’m an optimist and actually prefer to view the highlight reel, simply because that’s the fun of it, the problem is we start comparing everything good about their life to everything wrong with our life. Not only are we comparing our behind the scenes to their highlight reel, everything we desire is now magnified. Where 10 years ago we were doing it in person maybe at church or school, we’re now doing it among our 600 facebook friends, or 1800 twitter followers. All of the sudden, we’re the only ones and our every desire is magnified.

Facebook happened to be released my senior year of high school, so although I’m not of the generation that’s grown up on it, I’ve lived much of my adult life on it, so I think it’s safe to say that, starting with me, we have become a generation that is addicted to affirmation. We know how to manipulate the media better than anyone and it’s a serious distraction. Not only that, but it’s created us to be narcisitic monsters. It’s the cause of much despression in our culture.

Recently a friend told me she got off twitter because she was just feeling really left out. I think she’s wise.

Can we feel left out or rejected minus social media? Absolutely. We’re all human and in fact, it’s nearly unavoidable.

But the truth of the matter is, it’s our responsibility to take control of what we let rule over and own us.

Can we not take facbeook at face value?

Life itsn’t always what it seems, not matter how many posts suggest one thing or another.

Does it mean we quit facebook, twitter, tumblr, instagram and so on all together? No, it just means that those sites can’t be responsible for your happiness. Nor can they be your measure for reality. I think one wise thing we can all do is take a look back at our posts no matter where they are, and be sure we’re giving off a healthy balance and dose of reality. Are what we tweeting and saying true of us? How do we come across to the outside world lurking in?

The past year I’ve been thrown back into the stage of making new friends. Can we all agree that making friends is just plain hard? You inevitably face awkward conversations, and awkward dinner every now and then, and for lack of a better term, after much investment, you may just come to find out the chemistry (not romantic) just isn’t there. Also, for a sanguine girl who wants to be friends with everyone, I’ve realized that’s a far cry from reality. Because of this new season and revelation, I’ve found that reverting to the internet to bring me community and companionship is just as easy, but it lacks true intimacy and vulnerability, which to me, is no relationship at all. While making friends and creating community takes time, work, patience, vulnerability, initiation and so much more, the reality is, we were created for face-to-face friendships, not face-to-screen. We want to be known, loved and accepted, but we fear rejection, so we are more comfortable to correspond with people on twitter, as opposed to calling up a friend to meet for dinner.

Although I am guilty of it, when I’m among friends and family, I spend less time perusing social media. The “be with” factor is fairly effective. It’s times when I’m bored or lonely that I peruse and then fall into a pit because people are having fun, and do they know how boring my life is?

What a lie we’re trapped in.

Make a deal with me, will you? Let’s not let social media steal our joy. Let’s not let comparison get the best of us. Especially when we know that one day, none of those sites will even exist. Just like we knew middle school had an end, so does social media.

Instead of letting it make a fool of us, let’s be the first to reign in it. If we don’t do it, then I fear all hope is lost for those coming behind us. Let today be the day we put on a different thinking cap.  Instead of comparing, let’s start affirming those around us. Speak life, not resentment to somebody.

I don’t really know how to tie this post up with a pretty bow. But I feel so strongly about it, so I’m just going to ask the Lord to prove us different. Prove me different, Lord.

After all, as my pastor always says, joy is our birthright. To that I say amen! Let’s not let something, or someone steal it.

I love y’all.

Ladies! Today Beth and the Living Proof Live team head to Eugene, Oregon for Living Proof Live this weekend. Are any of you headed that way? I know they’re all looking forward to serving the ladies there this weekend.

For this coming weekend, we have 20 scholarship tickets to giveaway to those of you that would love to attend, but just cannot financially swing it at this time. We hope and pray that it will be a blessing to some of you.

If you fit this description, and have been waiting for this post to go up (grin!), please call the office and ask for Kimberly. You can call 281-257-3344 or call toll free at 888.700.1999. She will get you squared and away and good to go! If you happen to call during the lunch hour, please leave a message and we’ll get back to you ASAP.

Also, for those of you ready to get your praying on, our Siesta Mama has a request for you:

Dearest Siestas, at our last Living Proof Live two weeks ago, we had two more members of our praise team miss Saturday in Greensboro over one having to go to the emergency room. That makes two for two with our first 2013 LPL’s. If you would, please cover us a little extra in prayer this weekend because of added spiritual warfare in the Eugene area.   Agree with us that all sickness and emergencies will be bound for the remainder of 2013! Now, off to Eugene I go!

Every night my phone sits perched on an iHome dock that sits on my bedside table a mere two feet from my head. Besides the fact that the iHome speakers can get very loud (which I love when I’m listening to my music), it also doubles as my phone charger and my alarm. I’m not one who wakes up very well to a blaring beeping sound (I find that so disturbing), but I do love a good song to wake up to. I can either set the song I wake up to, or it grabs the last song I was listening to. Does that even make sense? This is really too much information, but bear with me. Anyway, I found it so appropriate when the other morning my phone woke me up by singing Sara Grove’s He’s Always Been Faithful. It had been a long time since I had actually listened to the song, but I must have pressed snooze and it just kept playing the next song, then the next one, and so on and so forth.

So, this is what I woke up to:

Morning by morning I wake up to find 
The power and comfort of God’s hand in mine 
Season by season I watch Him, amazed 
In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways 
All I have need of, His hand will provide 
He’s always been faithful to me. 

I can’t remember a trial or a pain 
He did not recycle to bring me gain 
I can’t remember one single regret 
In serving God only, and trusting His hand 
All I have need of, His hand will provide 
He’s always been faithful to me. 

This is my anthem, this is my song 
The theme of the stories I’ve heard for so long 
God has been faithful, He will be again 
His loving compassion, it knows no end 
All I have need of, His hand will provide 
He’s always been faithful, He’s always been faithful 
He’s always been faithful to me.

I love it so much. I don’t know a more appropriate song for the week that we have had. Y’all. I think we can all agree that it has been a heavy, bizarre and fearful week for so many people. It just reminded me all the more that we live in a very broken world with very broken people (including me and you) and we need Jesus in the worst way. And not only do we all need Him for the blatantly obvious evil around us, we need Him in our own day to day lives. (And the truth is, we DO have Him, but sometimes we act like we don’t.) We need Him to show up in the details we’ve feared He’s forgotten or pushed aside. Every now and then we need a reminder that He has always been faithful. To me. To you. To us.

As I was getting ready to head to work this morning, I thought what a better day than to share with each other the ways the Lord has specifically been faithful to us this week? Sometimes we just need to reflect, or really look and know that He indeed, has been faithful yet again. Even when we’ve been faithless. Maybe He’s answered an obvious prayer request. Maybe He provided for you in a way you didn’t even know how to ask for. Maybe you got a bit of encouragement from someone at the right time you didn’t know you needed. Maybe He spared you from a hurt. Maybe He protected you from what could have been a huge disaster. Maybe He rekindled an old relationship or friendship you’d been praying about. Maybe He sent you a new friend. Maybe He led you out of an area of tempation and gave you victory for one week in what you thought was nearly impossible.

I don’t know. We shouldn’t be able to count the ways He’s been faithful to us, because He always is, but sometimes we just miss it.

Last week I was feeling really needy in my love tank. I know that’s not necessarily a good thing, but it’s the truth so I was telling the Lord about it and just simply asked Him if He’d show me He loved me through one of my love languages. I realize that may sound really cheesy, and even though the cross was His ultimate sacrifice and love for me, and I know that, I just needed a little affirmation that I had not completely fallen off His radar. Listen, I’m just being completely honest. I didn’t know how He’d go about showing me, but I knew He could if He wanted to and if I’d just open up my eyes and see. My love tank happens to fill up pretty quick with quality time and words of affirmation, so imagine my delight when I got to work Wednesday morning only to receive a hand written letter from someone who didn’t know me from Adam. A letter of encouragement that only the Lord could have known I needed. Lest you think He’s not into the details, be encouraged that He is SO into the details. And if He can work out the small details and requests like that one, don’t you think He has the big things worked out, too? I love Him for that.

He is faithful, Sister.

He always has been and always will be.

So let’s hear it! Let’s build each other’s faith!

How has He showed Himself faithful to you this week?

Happy Friday, y’all!

“So let us seize and hold fast and retain without wavering the hope we cherish and confess and our acknowledgement of it, for He Who promised is reliable (sure) and faithful to His word.” Hebrews 10:23 (Amplified)

Girls! It’s Wednesday morning! Which means you’ve made it through half the week! Honestly, I don’t know how time flies so quickly.

BUT, we didn’t want the week to pass us by without sharing the Greensboro LPL recap video!

I’m speaking on behalf of the team since I wasn’t there in person, but I think they’ll agree when I say THANK YOU for your prayers on their behalf. They were heard! We’ve heard nothing but people testifying of God’s faithfulness from last weekend. So, thank you so much! And by all means, please don’t stop now. We’d love nothing more than for you all to press in all the harder with us.

We love y’all so much and appreciate you more than you know.

Enjoy this really fun recap!

Living Proof Live | Greensboro from LifeWay Women on Vimeo.

Good Thursday morning, lovely ladies! Shockingly, it’s a dreary, rainy and slightly cold day here in Houston, but that’s not going to stop any of the team from heading to Greensboro today for Living Proof Live this weekend. In fact, I think of all weekends, this is the one you’ll want to be at.

So, I think it goes without saying that we have 20 Siesta Scholarship Tickets to giveaway! We’re so pumped!

If you have the desire to attend this weekend, and are anywhere near Greensboro, but just don’t have the financial means to do so, then please call the office and ask for Kimberly. You can call 281-257-3344 or call toll free at 888.700.1999. She will get you squared and away and good to go! If you happen to call during the lunch hour, please leave a message and we’ll get back to you ASAP.

We love y’all so much. Really. And if by chance you didn’t see Beth’s post yesterday asking for prayer, please, go back down and read that one. Be blessed!

Happy Thursday, y’all.

And panic.

A week ago I had jury duty. I realize that it is my civic duty, or rather, my civic honor as they kept explaining to us, but it felt more like a duty and less like an honor. While I went to college in the land of prisons and criminal justice, I’ve never had the burning desire to be put on a panel of jurors, so to me the whole concept makes me sweat bullets.

You may have heard my sigh of relief when, after four hours of literally doing nothing but waiting, I was finally released to go home. No jury for me. At least this time.

Anyway, the entire day was a hurry up and wait kind of deal.

For instance, you have to be there at 8:00 AM or they’ll shut the doors on you, lock them and throw away the key. However, when I arrived at 7:15 in a slight panic not knowing what the day would hold, I made my way to the jury courthouse, got checked in, found my seat in a frenzy among 1300 other jurors, then proceeded to sit there until 8:45 AM when they actually shut the doors and locked them.

You see what I mean? Hurry up and wait.

And in my case, panic and sweat for fear the day might not end up in my favor.

When all was said and done, my state of panic was worthless. Thank you, Lord.

However, it stirred up in me something greater.

I don’t know about you, but that is how I always find myself waiting.

I wait in a panic.

A few summers ago during one of the Siesta Summer Bible studies, one of the questions on the first evening was to go around and share one word that describes the current season you were in. When it got to me, I didn’t even think twice before I blurted out the word “waiting”.

Nearly two years later, if asked the same question, I’d be inclined to share the same word.

Because I am, after all, in a season of waiting.

I’ve said it before and I’’ll say it again, waiting is the one thing God has used in my life to make me more like Him. The relief that statement alone brings me makes me thankful for the way He holds me in places that makes me more like Him. Far from easy, and even sometimes lonely, but at least I know He has a purpose for me in the waiting. I didn’t always think like that.

Since I get the joy of moderating the comments that come through this blog, that means that on SSMT days, I’m seeing a lot of scripture. It is impossible for me to read each and every one, or I’d be here for days, but on those days I’ve become a pro at skimming them. However, on this last SSMT post, at the top of nearly every page moderated, Psalm 27:14 popped up, “Wait for the Lord;
 be strong, and let your heart take courage; 
wait for the Lord!” It wasn’t the verse I’d chosen, but I took it as a sweet reminder from the Lord.

That as He keeps me in a season of waiting, it’s not to bully me, but to strengthen me.

I’m no scholar, but I do see a theme in scripture when the Lord speaks of waiting, He often speaks of strength.

“Have you not known? Have you not heard? 
The Lord is the everlasting God, 
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
 He does not faint or grow weary;
 his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint,
 and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary,
 and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
 they shall mount up with wings like eagles; 
they shall run and not be weary; 
they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:28-31

I think of a bride getting ready to see her husband at the end of the aisle. I’ve not yet been a bride, but I’ve been in my fair share of weddings and I think we all know the length of time it takes for the wedding party (particularly the girls) to get ready for the ceremony, and rightfully so. We spend all day primping (while the guys play golf and then get ready in 30 minutes tops!), then, about an hour before the ceremony, all of the sudden everything comes to a complete halt and we sit, and wait. And often have a moment of panic. All of our hustling and hurrying and scurrying around all day, to sit and wait. That hour before the ceremony is the hardest hour of the day, in my opinion, but the expectation of what’s ahead brings unspeakable joy. She waits with expectation.

Often times, I’ve noticed my weariness in the waiting comes when I am tempted to manipulate things to go my way. I get lonely, so I try to replace that with busyness. Then I get burned out. Or, I get antsy, so I try to manipulate relationships, only to watch them fall apart. Or maybe I need a job so bad I take my first offer, only to realize it was a terrible fit, instead of just trusting in God’s perfect provision. My timetable looks terribly different than His, so when I try to push my timing on others, whether it be people or things, I’ll always end up selling myself short. The moment I lose sight of the true prize, I fall.

But most times, our waiting is much longer than any of us like to think or wait, but if we only knew what He had in store for us, we know the waiting would be worth it.

My sweet coworker KMac said it best, “We wouldn’t appreciate ANYTHING without a little delay and anticipation.” And all the people said amen.

That’s why in the waiting we wait with hope.

We wait with expectancy.
We wait in patience.
We wait in prayer.
We wait in strength.

Most times, the waiting really isn’t about the waiting, it’s about becoming.

“And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking, and longing] to be gracious to you; and therefore He lifts Himself up, that He may have mercy on you and show loving-kindness to you. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) are all those who [earnestly] wait for Him, who expect and look and long for Him [for His victory, His favor, His love, His peace, His joy, and His matchless, unbroken companionship]!” Isaiah 30:18 (Amplified)

Those who wait win the prize.

But know that even when you become tired in the waiting, the Lord is still working out every little detail.

“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” Romans 8:26-28 (The Message)

You and I are waiting on the Lord to move in different ways, provide different things, and surprise us along the way. Instead of growing weaker, let us grow stronger. If you find yourself in any kind of waiting season, find things that stir your affections for Christ and pursue those.  Maybe the Lord’s given you a gift you’ve let get dusty, pick it up and start practicing that craft. Whatever you do, don’t put your life on hold. Panic and worry do nothing but drain us of any energy or hope we may have had.  This may sound harsh, but is there anything more unfulfiling that becoming selfish and living for yourself in our season of waiting?

And lest you think I’m writing this to preach to you, I’m writing this to preach to myself.

I recently saw this quote, on twitter of all things, by Charles Spurgeon, “The Lord’s “quickly” may not be my “quickly”; and if so, let him do what seems good to him!”

Expect, look and long for Him, dear Sister. At the end of the day, if you wait on God, no matter the outcome, I’m willing to bet by His promises alone, that the odds will always be in your favor.