My man and me

Thirty-eight years tomorrow.

The organist played the wedding march and I stood next to my Daddy in the foyer with my heart pounding like clapping thunder in my chest and wearing an ever so slightly off-white, nothing special wedding dress so as not to be a total fraud. We’d rented the dress for $65 and it never even occurred to me to mind. I come from very modest means and there was no world in which I expected my parents to spend several hundred dollars on a dress. They didn’t have it. And, except for the monthly stresses of bill paying in our home and overhearing my mom on the phone with bankers about overdrafts and loans and mortgages, we didn’t care that we made it by the skin of our teeth. It was normal to us and, for that matter, normal to most of the people we knew.

The congregation of about 200 came to its loud feet with the prelude and almost that many faces looked straight back at me and Daddy. My eyes darted up the middle aisle of that small Baptist church, shifting back and forth from smiling face to smiling face, many very familiar to me despite having been there a few short years. I served wherever I churched because that’s what I was raised to do. Never considered not. That day at Spring Woods Baptist Church in Houston, Texas, my wide-eyed gaze also fell on a few faces of those who filled the front aisles. Family members. And, trust me when I tell you, they weren’t smiling. Every year around our anniversary, Keith and I recount the whole ignominious scene with one another and mock the family scowls and laugh until our sides split. Nothing could have been less humorous on that particular day but the thought that we spited all of them by making it this long brings Keith and me no small glee. We were both in long term stable relationships when we met. I was engaged. He was soon to be. Each of our families loved our significant others. And, in a way I won’t go into trying to explain, so did we.

I’m not sure Keith and I ourselves completely understand why we dropped everything dependable and remotely stable in our lives and flew headlong into one another with all the tranquility of a pair of cymbals. The best explanation is that clamor attracts clamor and baggage attracts baggage and, boy, did we each have some. And then there was just pure chemistry. Had we been married to other people when we met, God help us, I trust we would have either ignored or resisted it or, by that time, never met but the fact was, we weren’t married, we did meet and we did not remotely ignore nor resist one another.

The words “wedding planner” weren’t even in my vocabulary or that of anyone I knew. The woman standing in the foyer with Dad and me on the day of the wedding was one of the very same women who brought a green bean casserole or jello salad every Wednesday night to fellowship supper. When the organ piped up, she nodded her head, touched my shoulder and said “Now.” She’d told us to go slow and Dad and I had practiced the night before but, for the life of me, I was either going to run down that aisle to that man in the tux or my hind end was going to flee to the parking lot where I’d holler like a wild hyena until somebody picked me up and hijacked me to Mexico.

I cannot say that it did not help that Keith Moore was the most beautiful man I’d ever kissed in all my life. Dad and I flew so fast down that aisle that my veil nearly took me to the wind like the flying nun.

A thought which carries impressive irony.

In seconds it seemed, the pastor said to the congregation, “Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Keith Moore.”

And, just like that, the wedding was over.

Let the drama begin.

And I guess in a lot of ways it’s never come to an end. It’s just a different kind of drama these days for the most part.

I’ve been asked many times if I’ll ever write a book on marriage. I don’t expect to. I have no intention of setting us up as some exemplary couple. Keith and I have not had a great marriage. But, somehow, in recent years, we’ve managed to find ourselves in a pretty good one. And I guess it’s fair to say you’ve never met two people happier about being pretty happy.

We don’t just kiss on our anniversary. We high five.

I’m really reluctant to do what I’m about to do because what if he and I get into the biggest fight of our lives tonight and I maniacally hurl all his fishing gear and deer heads and forty pair of unders in the front yard? I’ve never done that before but I’ve always known I had it in me. I’ve always kept my pitching arm in shape for such a time as this. And what if one of the neighbors videos us and I end up on the YouTube cussing? I’ve never been one to cuss much but, if I’m ever going to have a cussing conniption, it will be my luck to have it on the YouTube. One time I did try to leave Keith and he said, “Go right ahead. Leave me. But you’ll look in your rearview mirror and there I will be and not because I like you any better than you like me. Because I don’t. But because we are married and married we’ll stay.” Keith never was a great Catholic except about the one thing I wished he’d been more Baptist about: splitting.

And so, like somebody pulling teeth, I’m reluctantly going to tell you with little commentary a few of the things that have kept us at it, every single one of which is nothing but the dripping grace of Jesus. We can’t even take credit for the things that have actually worked. So here goes and then I’m closing this post and publishing it before I change my mind.

If you don’t mind, I’m going to do this backwards and start with the bottom line because everything else comes back to this: We have both and each been willing, many times through bitter tears and against our human-hearted natural preferences, to choose to love each other again. Over and over and over and over.  After some really harsh things.

We had Amanda nine months and two weeks from our wedding day after being told I’d need surgery to conceive. Liar, liar pants on fire. We may as well have named her Elmers. She was the glue God used to hold our first few years together. Then came Melissa, who was a dyed in the wool daddy’s girl. We still wouldn’t have made it even with them to consider, I’m sorry to say, if not for that one bottom line above.

We developed compassion for one another. We were both messed up and we each understood why. And, I really don’t know a better way to say it, we felt sorry for one another and started trying to help each other get better.

The fact that I could sob as I write this next one is fittingly ironic. We each think the other is hilarious. The only thing Keith and I have done as much as fight is laugh. I don’t know why we got that gift but we did. We even laughed at times in the terrible years. We tried not to but we couldn’t help ourselves. We are each the most absurd person the other has ever met. We are a cartoon strip and we know it.

One last thing. I told Keith before we were engaged that God had placed a call on my life at 18 and, if he didn’t think he could handle it, he better run for his life. Having no other paradigm for a woman in ministry, he looked at me with a measure of horror and said, “Are you going to be a nun?” (We’d made out for the better part of the last hour so the absurdity of this one makes me rub my forehead with no small delight.)  No, I said, to which he responded, “Then I’m in.” And he has been. For somewhere around 15 Bible studies, numerous other books, 23 years of Sunday School lessons, many years of Tuesday night Bible study and two Friday nights a month with me on the road. Unwaveringly. And not as a weakling but as the strongest willed man I’ve ever met. Nobody need wonder who wears the Wranglers in my family. And you may as well not go to seed feeling sorry for him. He’d have to lie to say I ignored him and then I’d have to hit him with my purse and, considering all the lip glosses in it, it would hurt considerably. Him, not me. He just wasn’t the kind that would be ignored. When we were at home together, we were at home together. I didn’t hang out on the phone all the time doing ministry or study my commentaries in front of him – I did that while he was at work – or flip through magazines. To this day, if I’m messing around on social media on my phone when I’m with him, he’ll say, “Pay attention to me!” And I’m glad he will. And I do. Or we’d have nothing.

And, finally, after many years, I returned a certain spiritual favor after all he’d done to be supportive of my calling: I just accepted him like he was and quit trying to turn him into a deacon or some big spiritual beacon. He didn’t want to be one. Doesn’t want to now.

Thirty-eight years tomorrow. This one man and me. We’ve decided to stay in this dance a little bit longer.

fullsizerender-3

 

Because, ladies and gentlemen, smilers and scowlers, we are Mr. and Mrs. Keith Moore.

 

 

 

 

 

Share

405 Responses to “My man and me”

If you'd like your own pic by your comment, go to Gravatar.com. Click the first button "Get your gravatar today ->", and it will walk you through a simple process to select a picture.

Comments:

  1. 251
    Midge Miller says:

    Happy Anniversary! Isn’t God good to love us so much that we are able to love ourselves and that He can help our husbands to love us when we are unlovable?! Thank you for sharing with us and know that when I pray for you I pray for Keith, too. Love you two fireballs!

  2. 252
    Jennifer Mosher says:

    May God bless your marriage with many more fruitful, growing years of grace.

  3. 253
    Bissy says:

    Congratulations on 38! This was a wonderful post to read and encouraged my heart. Blessings upon your relationship with Keith.

  4. 254
    Karen H. says:

    We will be 38 yeArs in January. I met and married very quickly after a broken engagement and still very young. We too had the sad faces and the they will never make it. Lots of times of doubt and lots of tears but like you lots of laughter. He is funny. He asked me something last night I said no and he did it anyway saying…oh , you meant no….I didn’t think so….we laughed for an hour over it. He is the stable one…keeps me grounded. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Happy anniversary to you both. God is faithful to our commitments if we just give him control!

  5. 255
    Becky says:

    Beth,
    Thank you for this post, and the honesty in it. We all need to hear this more: marriage is hard work, when we keep God as the center and hang on to Him and those vows in those tough times, the reward is there in the later years. We are right there with you and Keith–married 38 years, and been through some real hard, tough times. By Gods grace, we are enjoying marriage more today. I appreciate your honesty as a leader in sharing your and Keith’s journey. Happy 38th Anniversary to you both!!! ❤️

  6. 256

    Such honesty-how refreshing! Happy Anniversary Beth and Keith, it sounds like your style is working for you. God bless you with many more years of love and laughter!!

  7. 257
    Sylvia Price says:

    Beautiful. Sounds like my marriage. For better or worse we committed and stayed and now 38 years later God is still blessing and keeping us together.

  8. 258
    Nancy says:

    Dear Beth, God has indeed blessed you two. May you have many more years together, and each one more sweeter and precious than the last one. My husband and I have been married almost two years. We have perfected the fighting, but failed miserbly at the loving part. He is talking about leaving me.I ask Jesus to join our union at the altar of our wedding, and so HE is my hope that it won’t end, not like this. I love what Keith said about being in your rear-view mirror. I will take liberty to use that line in our next break-up fight. All this is because of the fall, right? I can’t wait to have words with Mr. and Mrs Adam and Eve. What were they thinking??? GOD BLESS YOU TWO!!

  9. 259
    DIANA VIGIL says:

    Beautiful post. Congratulations to you and Keith! God will continue to honor your faithfulness to one another.

  10. 260
    Deanne says:

    Congratulations on 38 years of marriage!! To God be the glory!!

  11. 261
    Kathy says:

    Beth, I understand the decision to love one another so very well! Chris and I are together 25 years this August, with four children to bless us! Lots of fights, and two separations, and many ounceling sessions and of course prayer, we love each other more now than we did in 1990 when we first fell in-love! Happy Anniversary to you and Keith!

  12. 262
    Lynette says:

    Congratulations to you and Keith on this milestone. Getting to know you through your studies and books, I’m looking forward to meeting you someday….even if it’s not until we are in that glorious place in the Presence of our Lord. We have so much in common and I know we will recognize each other immediately. Of course I know what you look like!! I could relate to some of your examples of your married life, and may I say, there are days when I’m so very thankful there is no marriage in heaven except that of the Bride to the Lamb!!
    May God continue to shower His blessings on you both.

  13. 263
    Lisa Riley says:

    Thank you for being REAL! Happy Anniversary Beth and Keith!

  14. 264
    Michelle Sosa says:

    I cried as I read this. We (you and me ) have been friends for the past 10 years or so. I have done atleast 1 maybe 2 of your studies every year for the past 10 years. You have played a huge part in my spiritual walk and life and I have never once thanked you. So here I am saying thank you on this post because what you wrote is what I needed to read. To me thank you feels like an understandment for the gratitude I feel towards you, your ministry and your raw but still honoring vulnerability. I needed to see this, read this and here’s to hoping I will get the chance to reread it again , maybe even later on today when the rubber meets the road at my house.

  15. 265
    Karen Pope says:

    Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. Moore!!My husband and I will be celebrating 37 years in August. Our marriage has seen more than its share of ups and downs over the years. The downs include a sudden job loss, tragic deaths of family members, wayward adult children, and several medical scares. The ups include raising three beautiful daughters, being part of our beloved church family these past 23 years and the blessing of four amazing grandkids who all live near us!! God is our glue and He gets all the glory!! Enjoy your special day. Beth Moore, you are so loved. Keep on sharing your gift.

  16. 266
    Hannah Belle says:

    Love, love, love this sweet post! Happy Anniversary, Ms. Beth and Mr. Keith! God bless the next 38!

  17. 267
    Donna says:

    I so love this. Thank you for sharing. Happy Anniversary to you both!

  18. 268
    Janet VanDagna says:

    Congratulations Keith and Beth! Thank you for sharing the fact that we ALL have difficulties and that JESUS is the only one that can get us through those tough times. HE is so good!

  19. 269
    Joan says:

    Thank you for bravely writing about what most will not. You’ve helped a lot of marriages with this one. Bravo, Beth! ❤

  20. 270
    Deb Mott says:

    Covenant Love! Happy Anniversary! I keep thinking about you all and how much a blessing you both are to each other and your families, to the LORD and the world: a man that has been true to you and you to Him… you brought the wine of God’s Spirit, the gift of the Holy Spirit in a greater measure and I thought of this verse that you just taught

    Jeremiah 31:11-12Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)

    11 for the Lord has ransomed Jacob
    and redeemed him from the power of one stronger than he.
    12 They will come and shout for joy on the heights of Zion;
    they will be radiant with joy
    because of the Lord’s goodness,
    because of the grain, the new wine, the fresh oil,
    and because of the young of the flocks and herds.
    Their life will be like an irrigated garden,
    and they will no longer grow weak from hunger.

    May the years ahead be roads into Soul Feast Sweetness of Lord in greater measures together in the golden years when Goldness of Christ increases! Not just fine but wine! Wine of Spirit more and more! Thankful for you all! God’s rich blessings to you both! Happy Blessed Anniversary!

  21. 271
    Tandy says:

    This story is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I can’t begin to tell you what your ministry has done for me!!!!! I love you so much and I haven’t even met you in person. I thank God for you and thank Keith for sharing you.
    Love,
    Tandy from Louisiana.

  22. 272
    Laurie says:

    What an awesome story and inspiration of making a choice to love in Gods grace

  23. 273
    Sally Boothe says:

    Congratulations on your 38th anniversary Beth and Keith!!! Thank you for your sweet testimony on marriage and especially for keeping it real and honest. I pray you have at least 38 more years together. Blessings!

  24. 274
    Maura Guillory says:

    I pray God continues to extend His healing hand, unfailing love, abounding grace, and endless mercy over your marriage for another year. You and Keith are a testimony.
    Happy Anniversary!!!

  25. 275
    Judy Lawson says:

    Beth, thank you so much for sharing. It is kind of crazy how much our stories are alike in this area. Bill and I will be married for 40 years in June. 30 of them were spent in survival mode. He was not a Christian, but I fell head over heels for him anyway. The problems started within the first month. I hadn’t started dealing with my own sexual abuse issues yet, but they came out with a vengeance. He had huge issues as well. It took 30 years, my own healing from my past, one affair on his part and an almost affair on mine before we allowed God to strip us down to the bottom and begin again. Ten years ago I went away with him for our anniversary and for the first time ever I was excited to do so. God just keeps giving and things keep getting better and better. Over the last year, I have fallen head over heels in love with my husband. I tell him it’s like the 19 year old I never had the chance to be. He fulfilled His promise to me to restore the years the locust had eaten. My gratefulness knows no bounds. To coin your phrase, we are living proof that God can save a marriage that didn’t have one single thing going in it’s favor. He is amazing.

  26. 276
    Tess says:

    Beth, your story ministers to me because it is so similar to our marriage testimony. And our bottom line is the same….love is a choice we make every day, and our kids were the Elmers that kept us together when I tried really hard to pull us apart…and my husband’s unwavering loyalty kept chasing me and not leaving when I told him to. Praise God! His grace is what found us as a heap of hurt 11 years into our marriage and redeemed our souls and marriage. We are celebrating 30 years in a week…and I’m with you….it’s a high-five moment for 2 people who tried to wreck it, but couldn’t because of God’s grace. I just got “Audacious” for Christmas. Looking forward to reading it in 2017. Thanks for your heart to serve God’s kingdom. We are all richer because you said yes to His call.

  27. 277
    Faylinn says:

    I LOVE this! God is so good to show us, through you, that we are all the same… messed up, yet can still make it through. Thank you for sharing and being real!

  28. 278
    Sarah Goode says:

    I hope and pray you read this Beth and hear how your transparency has helped my marriage. Early on when I did Breaking Free.. back in the day… I just was nuts about you and your teaching and style. I am a blonde Georgia Peach now living in Nashville, TN. I have completed several of your studies through the years and continue to love your ministry and heart for the word and Jesus. I am married to a wonderful, believing, hunting, fishing man BUT yes we are different and I have struggled through the years… Mostly me trying to make him into a deacon (like my daddy) or some other type of spiritual leader for our home or church. Honestly, he is an amazing guy but I just could not seem to leave it alone and let God do His work…. I know all the truth about this but have had a hard time letting him be himself… Well- your book Audacious – that I picked up at the Lifeway Women’s Forum in Nashville this year has been such a HUGE blessing to me. Thank you for writing it …. A good friend of mine told me you shared about your relationship with your husband and thought it would help me… And Wow… Yes it did… page. 148 “When he sits with me in church I’m glad, when he doesn’t, I am no longer mad” I know God is healing me and my heart and teaching me to trust him and be ever so thankful for my man. I really appreciate your honesty. God is using you sweet sister to further his kingdom and love. Blessing and Happy Anniversary.

  29. 279

    Happy Anniversary to you both, Beth! Love your honesty here. We have struggled our way through marriage, too, but like you and Keith, we are committed to it and to one another. And by the way, love how you say you guys are a cartoon strip 🙂

  30. 280
    Jessica Thorberg says:

    Oh, what a picture! Absolutely gorgeous, and a true telling- Hands held on for dear life, heads bowed and looking up in humble adoration, and pressed together in different positions, but in unity. Thank you for teaching us how all those bumps, pits, and even disasters didn’t stop God from his great purpose in your lives. What Great Love.

    Happy Beautiful Boot-stompin’ Hand-clapping Anniversary! We are high-fiving here for you both!

  31. 281
    Alex says:

    As someone just starting out her career and ministry, I’m so grateful for your transparency and honesty. It is brave, refreshing, and helpful. Thank you for not being afraid to show us reality. We need that more than masks.

  32. 282

    And that right there … that’s why I’ve always loved you, Beth Moore … my Siesta Mama. You are real. When my marriage of 30 years is chaos, I remember your testimony. At the age of 29, my hands held on tight to the hem of your long sparkly jacket because your hands were held on tight to Jesus. The first time I heard you speak … I was desperate … and this is what I thought–I want to love Jesus like Beth does. And now, I do. I love you. And I love your family. Thank you. Thank you for following Jesus so I could follow you straight to Him.

  33. 283
    Jennifer Garner says:

    Thank you thank you for being real! Please do not delete. My husband passed away 6 1/2 years ago and God has promised me that I will be loved here on earth again one day. So as I wait I love to read and learn from others about marriage because me and my Nathan didn’t do it completely right. Nonetheless I loved him and he loved me, but I want to honor God like never before when the day comes. Your words are encouraging to my soul!

  34. 284
    Julie Lohr says:

    Oh Beth, what a blessing you are. Congratulations and many prayers for you and Keith and your family. Continue Glorfying the Lord and setting such a wonderful example to us all. No rose colored glasses here. Your sister, in Christ Jesus our Lord and Savior.

  35. 285
    Janice says:

    Having celebrated 47 years of marriage last May with a big plate of “sketty” with the grandkids, we too are a rarity, even if only in my family’s eyes. I’m the only child of six that hasn’t been married or separated multiple times (several as many as 6 times) and even my parents were divorced. My mother didn’t take to my choice of my future husband, saying he was too lazy to work on a pie wagon! He even joked with her in later years that he didn’t really love me, he just stayed married to me to irritate her.
    Thoroughly enjoyed your account of your wedding and marriage. Thanks for your transparency, honesty and the truth of how God has blessed you and Keith.

  36. 286
    Tensie Palmer says:

    My dear Mrs. Moore, this is the most wonderful post I have read lately. You are a real person and I love you sister! Thank you for writing your heart and sharing the “real” of your life yet again.
    God bless you both and Happy Anniversary!
    Tensie

  37. 287
    linda says:

    Mr. & Mrs. Keith Moore:
    Thank you for this wonderful glimpse into your private life. The thing that I see in what you wrote is that you both never gave up, even when things got tough…that’s the key! With Jesus as that third cord that binds you together, nothing can break it. May the two of you have many, many more wonderful years together. In Jesus’ precious name…Amen!!

  38. 288
    Kim Howard says:

    My cousin sent me a post of living for who is still here and not missing out because you miss someone else. So I liked you page and started looking,this was the first thing I have read. Let me just say I couldn’t be happier. My husband and I fit into this story so well. We are only at our 11 years together and 10 years married and our children have bee our glue many more times then I would like to admit and our second thing is the promise I made my dad the night david asked him for my hand in marriage, and that was we promised this is what we wanted forever and we would always find a way to work it out and never would look intodivorce as the answer to our problem. Thank you so much for this blog! God wanted me to read this message for a reason and that’s why it was the first thing I read and I’m grateful.
    Kim Howard

  39. 289
    Linda says:

    Your story was transparent…it will be used by God to help many for His glory…being a Catholic girl when I got married to a Baptist boy…me being unsaved at the time…I remember on my wedding day making my commitment to the man who was saved but to God the most knowing He existed being Catholic…but not saved in July of 1972…but our God is always in control…did not go back to Tom’s church till God called 1974…got saved…into God’s family…fall of 1974 we were Baptized together…found out my mother-in-law had been praying for me all those years 6 we went together…learned the importance of prayer through that nugget God gave me through her…God has directed me over the years…since He is the One and Only One Who does the transforming work in our lives…what a blessed Hope we have in Him…that Commitment made on my wedding day before all those people was before God to this day He has kept me…Psalm 139 Praise Him…

  40. 290
    Sonja Graham says:

    Beth…thank you so much for sharing your story and most of all thank you for yielding to the call of Jesus. I have learned so much from your teaching and your down to earth relatability is much needed. While reading your post I could picture your story as if I were there. God bless you and your family and keep up the good work.

  41. 291
    Sheryl Vickery says:

    Oh the painful journey of two becoming one flesh. 36 years and I’m finally letting go of expectations and disappointments. So much surrender. So much learning holy things. Some days I am totally overwhelmed that we made it at all. Dying to self is so very painful and I admit I had a lot of death to walk through. Still learning to bear up under.
    Thank you Beth for bearing up under many things for the sake of Christ. I am another one whose life is miraculously effected for Truth because of your giving.
    I want to bear fruit for Jesus.

  42. 292
    Amy says:

    Momma Beth, Happy Anniversary and thanks so much for sharing this. Throughout the years, I’ve hung on to the snippets you’ve shared about your marriage because, more than any other teacher I’ve sat under, your beautiful, quirky relationship looks most like my own 12 year marriage. So many couples seem to be in ministry together. Meanwhile, my former altar boy looks like he’s crawling out of his skin half the time we pull out of our Protestant church parking lot. It has made me wonder, at times, if God made a mistake putting us together and/or calling me to ministry. Don’t get me wrong, my husband loves the Lord Jesus. He also loves me to the moon – weird as he thinks I am sometimes. We’re just not your typical ministry couple. I’ve learned to see how God has given me my husband as a protector. I would undoubtedly take on too much and burn out in a hot minute. He won’t tolerate that – thank God! He also won’t let me be too weird. I won’t get into detail on what I wanted to write on our family Christmas card this year. Suffice it to say that the final draft said simply, “Merry Christmas! Love, the Hills” haha. Anyway, thanks once again for sharing your very self with us. One day, you’ll understand just how much it has meant to all of us and, specifically, to me…

  43. 293
    Denise says:

    Happy Anniversary Mr. &I Mrs. Moore!! May you be blessed with
    Many more-this is such a beautiful post, thanks for sharing your
    Heart with us, it reminds me so much of me and my man. I can only hope
    And pray to make it as long as you have and we both know that nothing
    Is impossible with God!

  44. 294

    Beth Moore and LPM,
    I just wanted to write and say just how much I appreciated your blog post about your marriage. Marriage (and life in general) is hard! Your weekly Wednesday evening tv spots along with this post spoke directly to my heart. This last year and a half has been full of unbelievable ups and downs. My family has served in our local church since before my children were born. My oldest is now 22 and my youngest 17. My husband is a deacon and we have faithfully served in many different ministries and loved every single second. About 6 years ago God directed me to become more involved in girl’s youth ministry. Around the same time doors opened for me to join the board of our local pregnancy center. God is absolutely amazing at putting just the right people around His people to impact their lives. These 2 areas of ministry worked hand-in-hand to glorify God and direct young women to the maker of all life. Things were going great, or so it seemed. My children have been raised from day 1 in The Word and to cling to Christ. My then 16 year old dropped a bomb on us and revealed she was pregnant. We had no idea how to even move forward. This is our baby and pride and joy. This completely shattered our “perfect” world. What a test of faith when an unplanned pregnancy hits home. My daughter chose life (which truly was never a question). She ended up graduating 1 year early and enrolling in our local junior college. We have an amazing opportunity to be a huge part of this child’s life due to But, this crack in our fairy-tale world just about broke this “Christian” family apart. I guess as a Christ-follower, I had in my head that when you are following God’s will that these kinds of things can’t happen. I feel like my family has been under such a strong spiritual attack through the entire ordeal. We clung tight to Jesus and just took everything day-by-day. During all of this, me and my husband have actually separated 3 times. Our perfect marriage turned out to be not-so-perfect and our picture-perfect family turned out to be perfectly human after all. Through all of this we have questioned if we truly were following what Jesus had spoken. In the beginning we withdrew from every place of ministry because we felt so flawed that God could not possibly use us. How were we supposed to help others when these were the things going on in our lives. But, with that said, God is making it apparent that these circumstances are exactly what He wants to use for His glory. I can’t seem to help but revert back to questioning Him because I truly don’t understand God using such a messed up situation. The feelings are so mixed because not ministering and working with young people makes me feel like a fish out of water. My fear is that this will all be thrown back in my face since I failed to protect my family and allowed this pregnancy to happen in the first place. Thank you for your transparency. Sometimes it does seem like those in high-profile places of ministry have it all together and live perfect lives. I hate that the church has put such a mask on such messed up people. We are all in the same boat simply trying to follow Jesus in an imperfect world. I can’t help but feel like we need to scream as loud as possible that we are screwed up, but some are just better at hiding it. Much love and prayers for you, your entire team, and your family. Thanks again from the bottom of my heart.

    Your sister in Christ,
    Melanie Wingate

  45. 295
    Judy Grieve says:

    Thanks for sharing with such honesty. Your last few lines really resonated with me and I am appreciative of your insight.

    I have my verse ready for January 1. I look forward to this Bible verse memorization time. I may not remember them all, but I have the little notebooks, so all it not a hopeless cause.

    Blessings to you and Keith… Happy New Year.

  46. 296
    Cricket Russell says:

    Thank you for sharing this. My husband and I have been married for 27 years. It has not always been good but I told him when we were first married God says there is one way out of this….make me happy or I will help him. Of course I was only joking, but I did mean for us to stay married. My parents are divorced and I never wanted to put my children through that. We have had some really great years and some not so great ones but our commitment to God has allowed us to still be here. His grace…..wow. It is nice to know others have faced the same journey. Thank you for your honesty.

  47. 297
    Louise says:

    Thank you for being the blessing you are and have been in my life and so many others. My life has been filled with such despair and feeling unloved and unwanted for the majority of my life. I had wanted Jesus in my life for so long but could not figure out how I could have Jesus in my life and how HE could love me when my own family did not love and want me. I am so fortunate to know that Jesus loves me and your bible studies have helped me and so I thank you.

    I am so happy for you and just wanted to tell you thank you for sharing this part of your life and all the other things you have shared because it does minister to others.

  48. 298
    Amy says:

    Happy 38th Anniversary Beth and Keith!! Thank you for your honesty, your courage and your serving. I was introduced to you Beth 10 years ago and what a different life I have had since then! Thank you Keith for all of your love and support for Beth because there are so many who couldn’t have done life without her showing us the way to Jesus. My husband and I will be celebrating our 30th soon and I would not have made it without Beth’s study on Wising Up 10 years ago. I have done quite a few of your studies now and have gone to your Living Proof events and brought women with me too. I now lead Bible studies as you told me I would one day because God placed it on your heart to tell me! God bless you and your family! Happy Anniversary!!

  49. 299
    Valerie Hunsberger says:

    You are so honest! My story is similar so I completely get it! Thank you for sharing yours. God bless you and Keith and give you many more years together.

  50. 300
    Donna says:

    Thank you as always for your transparency, truth and sense of humor. All point to
    an amazing testimony of unconditional love for your family and the women you minister to.

Leave a Reply

To receive a daily digest of comments on this post, enter your email address below: