Sometimes I’m stunned by one’s ability to sum up something so profound in so little words; and not only that, a statement that holds so much weight and truth. With twitter’s 140-character limit, I’ve slowly learned and had to work at summing up simple thoughts, which has been a wonderful challenge for me personally.
Comparison, if you think about it, really is the thief of joy.
Thank you, Theodore Roosevelt.
He was tweeting before twitter ever existed.
Comparison, over the years, has changed its game. Where as we used to compare ourselves literally in person and face to face, we now compare ourselves not only in face to face situations, but on top of that, we’ve added the wide world of social media to compare literally everything.
A few weeks ago before Beth posted this profound blog about doing the thing we’re called to do, she asked me if I had anything for the blog that day cause if not, she had a word pressing and wanted to share it. (We make sure not to double up. Awkward!) Of course I told her to go ahead because I was in the middle of working on a post, but it was far from presentable.
I actually didn’t read her post until later that night, but it stopped me dead in my tracks because, although she wouldn’t have known what I was in the middle of writing about, our posts were very similar. I shot her a quick text to tell her that her post was amazing and indeed, needed, and then explained that the one I said I had been working on but wasn’t ready yet, was one about comparing our lives to everyone else’s via social media. She was gracious as she always is and was afraid that her post might have in some way ruined mine, but I assured her that wasn’t the case.
Ironically, the longer I thought about it, I decided I might as well not even post this blog, because, you guessed it, hers was way better than mine and obviously fitly spoken, but then it dawned on me, that’s exactly what I was talking about. Comparing our lives via the ever so brilliant social media. If the Lord had given me the words to type, then I would be disobedient not to post for fear that it wasn’t as well received. Or for fear that, comparatively, hers was way better. What an ugly truth I kept telling myself.
What I was about to keep from posting was the very thing I felt like sharing.
I think it’s obvious that I need this word more than anyone.
Allow me to explain.
We live in a generation that is more connected than ever, and for the record, over-stimulated, yet lonelier than ever. I know that is old news to most of us, but it is our current reality and every now and then, I think it’s appropriate to revisit.
Not only do I see it in the young girls I work with, I see it as being prevalent among all generations. Most of us, if we were being honest, have been sucked into the vortex that is social media.
Before we go any further, you need to know that I’m game for all things social media. I love it. It is, in fact, a part of job title here at LPM. I don’t just love it, I’m swimming in the deep end.
With that said, a few weeks ago as I was getting a pedicure, I picked up one of the magazines sitting on the table next to me and happened to flip right to a short article explaining that those who spend more time perusing facebook tend to be more depressed than those who don’t.
I may have gasped audibly and even said under my breath, “Well, duh!” because to me, that made perfect sense.
What we otherwise would have known nothing about 10 years ago, we are experts on now.
Experts on what? On how other folks are living their life and what we’re missing out on.
For goodness sake, it can be even really good things that can become distorted to us.
Say for instance a string a tweets or facebook status updates that took place from a handful of members from a certain church. (Hear me loud and clear, I’m using this example because I have done it. I did it. I am doing it.) You may love your church, but reading those updates you may get a sense of discontentment from your church. All the sudden you may get the feeling that your worship isn’t good enough. The teaching is mediocre. Childcare is iffy. Your church will never measure up! What a lie! When in reality, our church could just have more tweeters than yours. (What a weird sentence to write!)
Maybe you become aware of a party or gathering that was blasted on social media that you didn’t get invited to.
Maybe you couldn’t attend a certain conference for one reason or another, so instead of enjoying your weekend, you spend countless hours on twitter reading every last tweet and throwing yourself a pity party. FOMO, the fear of missing out, has you handicapped.
Maybe you find out from facebook that your ex-boyfriend is not only dating somebody, but is now engaged and getting married in three months.
Or how about your twitter followers? How often do we compare our number of followers to our friends? Why is this person following so-and-so and not me? And boom, they unfollow me, so I unfollow them. You just got served. Or better yet, it becomes a popularity contest throwing us back to the middle school years. We start to evaluate who’s in the “in” crowd and who’s not. I don’t know about you, but I want to leave my middle school years in their rightful place, and that is in the past.
Forget followers, let’s just talk about twitter replies. Can I say something that gave me so much freedom? You and I have the right and freedom to respond to whomever on twitter. I think some of us feel an obligation to respond and converse with the millions on twitter, but can we all give each other a little slack and be free? Can we not get jealous when someone gets a reply and we don’t? Even typing that out sounds so unbelievably silly. But you and I both know it’s the sad reality and truth. If any of us have struggled with people pleasing (hand raised!), we can get stuck in trap where we now feel the obligation to people please online as well. Oh, the pressure!
Or, to throw it out there, how about “likes” on Instagram. That alone could throw us for a loop if we think we’ve posted the best or cutest picture ever and it only gets 18 likes. Or maybe we’re so in it for the attention that we spend more time instagramming and less time socializing.
Do you see how we’ve become hyper-aware of what we’re lacking, or what we think we’re lacking? We’re setting ourselves up for failure and rejection and the fact that we all know that social media isn’t going anywhere, and in fact, only growing, means that we have to learn what our personal balance is. Things we never would have known about, and nor probably even cared about ten years ago are throwing us into a pit of despair. A pit of loneliness. A pit of discontentment. Nothing will snatch our identity in Christ from us quicker than comparison.
One thing I’ve discovered, and maybe it’s just me, is that I tend to interact more on social media with those I’m not interacting with face to face. Now, in some cases that’s not true, like say for example when my BFF posts a picture of her baby, it’s everything in me not to like it 100 times and retweet it to the entire universe. And by all means, I love a good joke or word of encouragement to a friend on twitter, but most times, when I send a tweet, I am choosing to interact with a world of people I do not know personally, all the while expecting them to care and respond like we’ve been friends for 15 years.
As if rejection doesn’t take a serious toll on a human being as it is, we’ve now added another dimension. I’m almost tempted to call it imaginary rejection. Rejected by those we’ve never even met. Nor talk to on a normal, consistent basis.
With comparison comes jealousy and I’m not sure anything steals your joy quicker than feeling jealous.
I read a quote by Steven Furtick recently, the pastor of Elevation Church, that said, ““One of the reasons we struggle with insecurity is because we’re comparing our ‘behind the scenes’ with everybody else’s ‘highlight reel.’”
Although I’m an optimist and actually prefer to view the highlight reel, simply because that’s the fun of it, the problem is we start comparing everything good about their life to everything wrong with our life. Not only are we comparing our behind the scenes to their highlight reel, everything we desire is now magnified. Where 10 years ago we were doing it in person maybe at church or school, we’re now doing it among our 600 facebook friends, or 1800 twitter followers. All of the sudden, we’re the only ones and our every desire is magnified.
Facebook happened to be released my senior year of high school, so although I’m not of the generation that’s grown up on it, I’ve lived much of my adult life on it, so I think it’s safe to say that, starting with me, we have become a generation that is addicted to affirmation. We know how to manipulate the media better than anyone and it’s a serious distraction. Not only that, but it’s created us to be narcisitic monsters. It’s the cause of much despression in our culture.
Recently a friend told me she got off twitter because she was just feeling really left out. I think she’s wise.
Can we feel left out or rejected minus social media? Absolutely. We’re all human and in fact, it’s nearly unavoidable.
But the truth of the matter is, it’s our responsibility to take control of what we let rule over and own us.
Can we not take facbeook at face value?
Life itsn’t always what it seems, not matter how many posts suggest one thing or another.
Does it mean we quit facebook, twitter, tumblr, instagram and so on all together? No, it just means that those sites can’t be responsible for your happiness. Nor can they be your measure for reality. I think one wise thing we can all do is take a look back at our posts no matter where they are, and be sure we’re giving off a healthy balance and dose of reality. Are what we tweeting and saying true of us? How do we come across to the outside world lurking in?
The past year I’ve been thrown back into the stage of making new friends. Can we all agree that making friends is just plain hard? You inevitably face awkward conversations, and awkward dinner every now and then, and for lack of a better term, after much investment, you may just come to find out the chemistry (not romantic) just isn’t there. Also, for a sanguine girl who wants to be friends with everyone, I’ve realized that’s a far cry from reality. Because of this new season and revelation, I’ve found that reverting to the internet to bring me community and companionship is just as easy, but it lacks true intimacy and vulnerability, which to me, is no relationship at all. While making friends and creating community takes time, work, patience, vulnerability, initiation and so much more, the reality is, we were created for face-to-face friendships, not face-to-screen. We want to be known, loved and accepted, but we fear rejection, so we are more comfortable to correspond with people on twitter, as opposed to calling up a friend to meet for dinner.
Although I am guilty of it, when I’m among friends and family, I spend less time perusing social media. The “be with” factor is fairly effective. It’s times when I’m bored or lonely that I peruse and then fall into a pit because people are having fun, and do they know how boring my life is?
What a lie we’re trapped in.
Make a deal with me, will you? Let’s not let social media steal our joy. Let’s not let comparison get the best of us. Especially when we know that one day, none of those sites will even exist. Just like we knew middle school had an end, so does social media.
Instead of letting it make a fool of us, let’s be the first to reign in it. If we don’t do it, then I fear all hope is lost for those coming behind us. Let today be the day we put on a different thinking cap. Instead of comparing, let’s start affirming those around us. Speak life, not resentment to somebody.
I don’t really know how to tie this post up with a pretty bow. But I feel so strongly about it, so I’m just going to ask the Lord to prove us different. Prove me different, Lord.
After all, as my pastor always says, joy is our birthright. To that I say amen! Let’s not let something, or someone steal it.
I love y’all.
Lindsee, this was amazing! I loved it! I love social media too but I feel very strongly about moderation and I hate to see people get so wrapped up in social media that that’s all they can think/talk about. When social media hurts real life friendships, it’s not worth it at all. Thank you so much for sharing. 🙂
Oh Girl – this is GOOD. Real good! You are a wise woman and this was an amazing word that, if taken to heart, could very well transform a life. I, for one, am so glad you followed through with your post. So rich!
Love this post! It is so true! I definately needed this today. Thanks for sharing!
Lindsee, you are too cute and right on point girl!! I could just picture you typing and saying to yourself, “am I really typing this”. Why? Because I feel THE SAME WAY. I’m “guilty” of those SAME comparisons / insecurities in regards to social media. In fact, I have NOT posted a blog in MONTHS because of the comparison & the enemy having a grip of fear (due to lack of comments) on me. Silly right?! Thanks girl… For sharing even when it was difficult or even when/if it didn’t feel good enough or as good. It was GREAT for me girl… and Hit home!! High Five (not that you need it from me… LOL). To God be the glory!!!
Dearest Lindsee,
Excellent, excellent post! So thankful God encouraged you to speak what He put on your heart.
Yes, indeed, Lord, prove me different.
Have a blessed day:)
Oh how this convicts me! I actually sent someone an email with this quote just last night after I spent the day comparing myself to a friend. Not surprisingly I was miserable!
Thank you for this GOOD word!
Lindsee,
Boy!!! I sure do need this post!!! I don’t do Twitter but see enuf on Facebook!!! This comparison thing is just aweful!!! I had a wonderful weekend retreat and came home all blest and feeling a glowy inside and sat down to my FB page right away and posted some pix of us having fun at the retreat sort of as a thankyou to the gals who invited me and my daughter to go. I knew some of the gals would see my post that I was thnking them. Well, then my sis got on with her weekend pix of all the grandkids she had over and thier family bonding etc. Put me in a real huff!!! She wanted to steal my joy I felt!!! So where did all this warm fuzzy “Joy in Jesus” feeling go??? Yes, I know I have seen envy towards me from her many times in our lives as sisters and once it was carried way too far but can I not let it go??? We use this social media thing to show the world our exciting life and inside we are lonely as ever!! Why are we not just honest with each other?? Is it not okay to feel lonely and depressed at times? Is it not okay to ask others to reach out a hug to us cuz we are feeling depressed today??I am pretty content right now my life is chugging along peacefully right now but how about tomorrow???
You would think this social networking would connect us instead sometimes it is the very thing that drives us further apart.
The father of lies likes to tell us we do not measure up that someone else has the idealic life when it comes right down to it, contentment with where we are at and what we have is a virtuous gift of God and should be highly sought after!
Bless you Lindsee! I can see haow you would feel trying to measure up to Beth but hey! We all have uniquness not sameness!!!
Love Ya Girl!
Betty
Thank you for your well-timed and heartfelt words Lindsee! Never doubt what the Lord lays on your heart to share. We have that quote written in dry erase marker on the mirror in the bathroom. I have to remind myself of the words often, sometimes pretending it is one of my Scripture memory verses. 🙂
Thank you so much for this post. I was just talking about this in the car yesterday. You are so right. We fear rejection and don’t invite people in to our lives but spend time on social media instead. Balance is so important in life.
Amen and amen!! This is just what many of us (and our daughters) need to hear. Thanks for facing your fears and being obedient to share what the Lord had for you to share. You are a blessing Lindsee.
Dear Lindsee Lou,
I think you’ve illuminated something in our culture that’s taking over people’s lives. I call it the ‘fake life’, the sunny version of life that gets posted online.
And you’re right- it’s all about the trap of comparison of our lives, but if we’re comparing our lives to ‘the fake life’, what good is it? How can it not result in depression, and envy, and negative evaluation of our own life?
Your line-‘it’s our responsibility to take control of what we let rule over and own us’ is so true. I also think an attitude of gratefulness to our God who is so faithful can help counter the negative things that creep into our minds.
I left Facebook in 2010, mostly because it was a time- waster for me, and felt the need for some privacy. Now, I stay in touch with people that I care about the good old-fashioned way- I pick up the phone! (Land line, at that!)
Life goes by too fast for much indulgence in meaningless, superficial things, I’m learning. I’d rather stay in my quiet, little ‘real life’, than be concerned with other imagined ones.
Phil 4:6-7
“I don’t know about you, but I want to leave my middle school years in their rightful place, and that is in the past.” LOVE IT! haha
Social Media Boundaries 101. Thank you, Lindsee!
Thank you for posting this- your words, though similar to mama Beth’s, are from a different view point/generation! I love that you’re speaking out about it! I’m a youth pastors wife who just responded to a student’s text about feeling “betrayed” — ” please remember that what you see &read on fb/twitter is not always reality” … it may be some version of it, but it’s not the WHOLE story! So, thank you for speaking out about this epidemic of “loneliness & overstimulation”- my heart is grieved by it regularly. 🙂
Sweet Lindsee,
I want you to know that your words lend insight to a mom of kids that are 19, 22, 23. Sometimes my husband and I can be so frustrated with their seeming addiction to instant information, communication and, as you said, affirmation. You give us a peek inside their hearts and minds that otherwise are not always clear to us. We can too quickly assume that the unknown is evil, when perhaps it just has the potential to be so. After observing abuses, it can be difficult to remember the good.
So what to do? BOLO for FOMO 🙂 Translation? Be On the Lookout for Fear Of Missing Out!! Loved the “highlight reel” vs. the “behind the scenes” comparison.
Then, “speaking the truth in love,” let’s grow up in Christ Jesus!
Does this mean I have to be a facebook friend of so ‘n so? Rats.
Amen and Amen! I agree whole heartedly! Although I am not a “facebooker” or a “twitterer” I’m just a twit-stalker?? ocassionally but still do not really understand it:) My daughter in her early twenties signed off of her facebook account for the very reason of how it made her feel. Very timely and oh how true. Thank you for such a thought-provoking word!
Thank you for sharing Lindsee. I’m so glad that you saw your own mistake in considering to not share. This is a valuable word from the Lord and needs to be shared in every way, shape and form by whoever He gives it to. Thank you for your faithfulness.
Lindsee,
I know it’s been forever since we’ve talked face to face! But I just wanted to leave an encouraging note much like the ones above.
This post was wonderful advice and it’s so encouraging to know that we are not alone in these struggles life sends our way. While there are so many wonderful things about this age of technology we live in, there are also so many difficulties that it brings. Loneliness and depression seem to run rampant in this world, but I often forget how helpful an encouraging word or dinner with a friend can be.
Thank you for this reminder that God calls us to be different, not just face to face, but online too.
Can’t wait to read more, keep blogging :). Your words are honest and heartening, but also challenging.
I enjoyed reading this timely post. Thanks for sharing the reality and proper perspective of social media. Blessings to you!
Perfect words for this 55 yr old to read today! You keep writing sweet one and allowing God to use You in ur special way!!!!
Dear Lindsee,
As I read your post the scripture that kept running through my mind was Proverbs 25:11 KJV A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver. What a good word Lindsee. Thanks for sharing. How often God has used this blog and you and Beth to shine the light on a part of my heart He would like to tend to..and like Jesus you both always accomplish that with so much love and grace. Thank you…
Oh you have no idea the truth you speak! I am in my early fifties and have FINALLY started getting my feet under myself and breaking free from so many insecurities….only to find myself doing everything you are referring to. Crazy!
Awesome post!
This. is. TRUTH. Very well-spoken, Lindsee! Thank you for your honesty, sweet one 🙂 I have no doubt that your obedience in sowing these seeds will reap a harvest! May God be glorified!!
xoxoxo
Wow, this is so timely and the fact that it’s on so many of our hearts is confirming.
I have recently set boundaries on myself that I will check Facebook Wednesdays and Saturdays only (unless I hear of a newborn or other big news) and then just take a boo at my notifications.
Guess what? The less I’m on, the better I feel. Don’t miss the obsession at all. Which is what it became.
Will be taking a few quotes from here (thanks Lindsee) to share with the women at my upcoming retreat Mother’s Day weekend. I already had a session on comparisons and THIS is perfect~
🙂
Oh, girl. Yes, yes and YES. I definitely have a love/hate relationship with social media. I love it because it’s fun, but hate it because it is so dang addicting. (What do you MEAN no one has posted a picture to Instagram in the last 10 minutes since I check it??? or even worse- Not a single one of my friends liked this beautiful picture I just posted???) Oh, it really is a sickness.
A few years ago, I had to take a break from reading some of my favorite blogs because I just could not understand why their blog was popular and mine wasn’t and I wanted to be in the circle with them. It was an ugly time, but I learned a lot about myself from that.
Thank you so much! It is so painfully true and good to know that so many of us have the same struggles.
Hugs!!
OMGoodness Lindsee…… THIS has been my problem and I didn’t recognize it until THIS VERY MOMENT!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for writing this despite wondering if you should or shouldn’t. With a following on Twitter that i can count on my one hand (and it’s been that way for a long time) I’ve felt very insecure, frustrated, unappreciated, & all sorts of things (sin) I’d never in a million years admit til just now. I’m making some changes TODAY! Love you & your heart!
That was very well put! I even deleted my facebook account last year after deciding that there is just too much drama associated with something like that. It made me anxious and unhappy and also I hate to say it, but I would rather talk to someone face to face and get to know them personally rather than virtually.
Amen, sister! You know, they really can become idols … stealing our time with God. Like anything can. On guard!
You have no idea how this was exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the right time! Thanks for obeying the Lord and writing this! Loved it!
Golly does this ever ring true to these ears! Last year, I up and decided to deactivate my facebook account and haven’t looked back. It feels as though a heavy burden was lifted from my shoulders! I feel free! I’ve realized that I do not care what the girl from third grade whom I haven’t seen in person since third grade did over the weekend. The friends I do care about are letting me know what they did over the weekend through other forms of communication. Most of my friends are surprisingly snarky about it. “Well, since you aren’t on facebook anymore…” “Since you’re too good for facebook now…” Yes, friends! I am too good for facebook! And so are you! I ask that we hold each other in higher regard as friends and communicate directly about issues in our lives. I don’t want to read about my dearest through my facebook feed or through a blog. I want genuine conversation again. I want to hear about their vacation in person, not by scrolling through my phone. All that to say, thank you for this post, Lindsee. It truly made me feel good again about my facebook sabbatical.
Glory to God!
I needed this. I was having a Facebook pity party myself Saturday night. I even wrote my own blog about it. God’s telling me something… and my green pastures that He’s leading me in are much better than the green pastures of comparison. Thank you!
Lindsee,
This is one of your best posts ever and so timely! I’m not even on Twitter for some of the very reasons you mentioned but am on Facebook and have often been stunned at how much it does feel like a trip back to middle school. I can know intellectually that it’s ok not to get as many likes as someone else, but I’m amazed at how disappointed I still feel sometimes when I don’t. What you said about comparison is really good, too. Thanks!
Thanks, Lindsee! I definitely needed that. It made me think about so much and even how often I am on social media these days! Maybe I just need a time of fasting from it all. Hmm…there’s a thought!
Instead of fingers flying over the keys, allow the index pointer connection with the off keys. There is a reason God gives the directive to be still before Him, so that He might invade and saturate that space where lonliness and seeming inadequacy intrude. In that quietness we will hear, “Beloved, stop worrying; Come to Me and enter into My rest; Receive My Spirit of power, love and self-discipline”.
“Oh, Lord! Prove me different as well! ”
I’ve hidden my Facebook app on my iPhone to get an idea of how many times I go to it throughout the day. It’s been a wake up call for me…and so was this message.
Thank you, Lindsee.
GIRL! this was a FANTASTIC post! and so very needed! i have actually gotten to the place where i only check my facebook page once every few weeks (just to help keep up with my ministry kids). i was getting SO INCREDIBLY depressed, despondent, discouraged (should i keep going?) because i was constantly playing the comparison game. During my church’s annual january fast, i decided not only to fast from food, but from fb as well… made a WORLD of difference in my attitude, my appreciation for where i am in my life as a single gal, and my appreciation for the ministry that God has entrusted to me. I agree with you that we have to keep social media in the proper perspective… and i also agree that those who are SERIOUSLY struggling should probably take a break! the quote you gave was awesome, and i plan to hold on to it: ““One of the reasons we struggle with insecurity is because we’re comparing our ‘behind the scenes’ with everybody else’s ‘highlight reel.’” so true.
Keep up the good work! 🙂
I think here it is appropriate to say quitting is an option. After everything you wrote, and what I know to be true… walking with Jesus always leaves me with choices! He is good. Nowhere in Scripture does it say we have to be on facebook, twitter, own a TV, … we can be engaged in culture and “not do” what everyone else is doing. It seems so odd to me that as humans we think we have to continue doing things that don’t work just because we can justify it. If I can handle facebook emotionally than I can choose to do it. If I can’t… by all evidence of my behavior then I can choose wisely to admit defeat, thank God he’s not trying to plug me if let’s say I’m square into a round hole. He wants me to be free in Him so I can shine… in the world but not of it might mean no social media for some or a lot of us. How can I be in the now if I’m off somewhere with someone else? I am getting off and getting to work!
You’re so right, Diana! Quitting is definitely an option. Each person is different and knows their own balance for sure! Quitting may be absolutely necessary for some, while pulling back may be necessary for others!
Social media…wreaks havoc on lives in a way that demoralizes that can drive a person to the brink of the cliff.
With two teenage daughters who utilize social media on a daily basis, I not only see the dangers, but the damage social media can do. I think the damage the social media does to one’s life far outweighs the dangers. My daughters are aware of the dangers, they aren’t so aware of the damage it wreaks.
You’re right – with the world at our fingertips, our children are lonelier than ever. It’s the party pictures that are posted on FB and the twitter posts about the fun everyone is having – only to realize it’s the group of kids your daughter hangs out with and she wasn’t included. And it’s all almost in “real time”. It’s the contstant BFF pictures that are posted…who is a BFF anymore? Do these relationships change daily? It seems so for my girls. Who do you trust anymore? How do we teach our children who we trust and how to establish one of those relationships that can last well into adulthood? It’s dang hard!
Social media is out to destroy our lives, but to get our children to realize the damage it wreaks is almost impossible.
Julie
Lindsee, I am so glad that you decided to ‘go ahead’ and post what the Lord laid upon your heart. It really ministered to me TODAY. I read a quote in my devotional this morning that spoke to this subject. (I wish I had the exact words with me, but I am at the office now.) The gist of the message was that unlike anytime before, we can now be made to feel poor, or poorly of ourselves, by people we do not even know. That really struck a chord with me…as did your words this afternoon. Thanks again for sharing!
This goes along with being content with where God has you! We should be happy and content and also be happy for others! I am an older Siesta and my adult boys warned me not to join tumbler because I would not like the language and topics on there! So I decided it was NOT necessary to fall into all the latest social media ideas! So along with being content, I also enjoy simplicity! 🙂 Dont get me wrong, I love FB and following some people on twitter and Instagram but a little goes a long way!!! Oh and I also love some of the games, but my mind can get so distracted from TOO much! By the way I just spent the morning with my BFF. In person, and NOTHING beats real life human interaction!! 🙂 Also I believe social media can take you away from the Word! But I do LOVE this blog so much Lindsee! Thank you for putting your post up too! 🙂
Facebook was released during my senior year of high school as well, Lindsee!
And recently, my husband and I deleted FB, twitter, and instagram from our phones. We are together a lot and were noticing that we both stare at our phones a ton! And we both ask this “innocent” questions like “What are you reading?” or “Whatcha lookin’ at?” that feign curiousity but really are passive aggressive questions to get the one’s attention turned back to the other. You just feel plain left out – whether you’re the one staring at your phone, comparing yourself to the world or the one that is sitting there, wondering why this person finds a screen more worth their attention than you.
Lindsee,
Awesome post! I needed to hear this today. Thank you so much for being obedient to the Lord and writing what He lays on your heart.
Great read, love the writers on here. Second reading I’ve had today one was the daily devotion of Pastor John “Personal” relations with a machine. I enjoy reading your blog. I’m not on it often but do stop in occasionally. Hugs & Blessings to you all ladies!
Ah!!! Thanks for posting this. In my church family, especially amongst women, social media is causing some serious issues! It is causing division in our church and identity issues, I believe. Actually, it’s causing a lot more issues that that. I find that I get jealous, compare myself, waste a ton of time lurking people I not only know, but don’t know, and keeping up with people I don’t really care about. Most of the women I talk to struggle with the same things I do.
I have had to get rid of Facebook and Instagram recently due to these issues and I find that I have more time to read God’s word, do things I need/want to do, read books, etc. Sometimes my husband and I get left out but more and more people know that we are of the grid and we get phone calls/emails/text invites. I feel like me giving up social media is a sacrifice I am giving to God and that He is blessing my obedience. It’s not bad for everyone but I couldn’t get a handle on it. I was ADDICTED. I would fast and then go right back into addiction.
I would base my identity/value off of how many people liked my posts or commented, instead of what Christ says about me. Seriously, the list goes on and on. There were definitely way more negatives than positives when it came to social media.
I’m still feeling a little lost and anonymous, but I trust God that He will fill all of those holes that I used to fill with social media!
Thanks Lindsee. You are definitely not alone!!!
Awesome, friend! Feeling convicted to do the same!
Thanks Lindsee!! You “rocked the house” on this one 😉 I’m sending it to my sweet facebooking, tweeting, instagramming, snapchatting 17 and 20 year old darling girls to read. You delivered this message with such grace and authenticity. Way to be brave! 🙂
I feel you, Lindsay! I ‘fasted’ facebook for a week (it was a major problem and addiction) and I felt so much better and more peaceful. It does feel like an epic popularity test, middle school is a good comparison. I am cutting way back because I find it steals my joy and my free time!
Amen and amen! Thank you for this post!
This was super Lindsee! Perhaps your very best writing so far in my opinion! And something I really needed to read! I’m an older woman and yet I still find myself having some of these social media problems you talk about.
Thank you for putting your heart in print!
God bless you!
Preach it, Linsee. Your way for God’s glory!
Lindsee, thank you so much for this post. This has been a huge struggle for me over the last few days. I saw friends go on a girls’ weekend and again felt the sting of loneliness. Why didn’t I get invited? Why don’t my friends want to spend time with me (and so on). This left me feeling even more isolated with my three small children. Thank you for ignoring your insecurity and posting it. I really needed your words.