Big Sisters and Little Sisters

I’m really ticked. I just ran into a beloved little sister in the faith on my way to work when I stopped off at a grocery store to grab a few things. She and her family are nearly being eaten alive by the enemy. Honestly, we stood right there in plain sight near the vitamin aisle and ratted on the devil and shook the family tree for some fresh truth. As big tears rolled down those cheeks, she said one thing so emphatically that it seared straight into my bones:

“I was just thinking about you this morning, Beth. And I’ve just gotta know: have you been here?”

Where exactly did she mean by here? In that place where the enemy seems to leave NOTHING untouched. Nothing unmangled by his crushing iron jaw. The scene of the onslaught. Where Satan seems to systematically and patiently and daily and hourly go for you – heart, soul, and body, and for everything and everyone you hold dear, and for all you know – that you know – that you know you believe. That season where you can’t seem to recover because every time you start to get back up, something knocks you down again. That season that you really do begin to believe will absolutely kill you…and, in some respects, it does. It kills the old you. If allowed to, it stones to death the Goliath within every David, one welting throw after another. Welcome to the sifting zone where Satan gets so much leash that he rips to bloody shreds everything he can get his paws on…but what is really real. What is really left behind when we are stripped bare of all our earthly security and fleshly confidence.

Have I been there, my beloved little sister?

Let’s see. How loud can I say this?? I HAVE BEEN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOY, HAVE I EVER BEEN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And part of me survived. And part of me died.

And the part of me that died, as painful as it was, needed to.

And when it tries to resurrect it’s ugly, deformed, decayed head, I remind it that it is dead, lest it need another killing. Because I don’t want another killing.

I don’t mean my baffling tendency to sin is dead. I deal with that old nature everyday. I can still – almost out of nowhere – vacillate furiously between self-love and self loathing until I’m so dizzy I could regurgitate. But that joint victim and victimizer in me, that violent inner working nurtured at the breast of deceit and raised in sickness with a bent on self-destruction, took what still appears over many years to be a fair beheading.

YES. I have been there. And it was so awful I still well remember almost to the detail. And this morning I was glad I did because my little sister in the faith – a MIGHTY woman of God – needed to hear it.

I got in that car so mad at the enemy and at this brazen, hateful world that I made a bee-line straight to work and clicked the words “new post.”

Big sisters, our little sisters need some encouragement. They need to know we’ve been where they are. Even if they’re not in a season of hell on earth. Maybe their house just smells like one huge dirty diaper. Maybe they just need a nap. Maybe they need a job. God alone knows exactly and truly what they need from Him but this WE can know they need from us:  encouragement! And, by God (and I mean that), we are going to give it to them.

Here’s what we’re going to do today. You who are 39 and under get to tell us where you could use some encouragement. You who are 40 and older and willing are going to give it to them. Here’s how it’s going to look:

If you are 39 or younger, you’re going to start your comment with “Your little sister here: …”

If you are 40 or older, you’re going to start your comment with “Your big sister here: …”

Here are the ground rules: (I’m going to warn you. When I’m furious, I can get into a bossy frame of mind and I’m there right this second. But, look at it this way. I’m beside myself in your behalf so humor me.)

Little sisters, don’t snow ball with every irritating, annoying, frustrating thing or relationship in your life. Get pretty quickly to the bottom line. I’m thinking about someone I really do love so much and want to encourage and help when at all possible but her emails to me are so long and about so many things going wrong and so many people going awry that by the end of it, all I can do is throw up my hands and say, “I am so overwhelmed, I have no idea where to begin!” Try, as much as you know how to tell us, to articulate what is really wrong. The real bottom line. Also, please look throughout the post for encouragements that may help you and keep in mind that what the big sisters write to one, they extend to all. Don’t be offended if no one speaks directly to you. Every encouragement is meant for every one of you.

Big Sisters, today is for encouraging our little sisters and that’s all. I know you have problems because I’m about your same age and I have a truckload of them. But you and I have lived long enough to know that we’re going to make it and that God IS going to be faithful and He is INDEED going to bring beauty from ashes and He will most certainly, given enough time, work every single detail out for our good and His glory. No complaining from us today. This post is a N0-Whine zone for big sisters. Life and the devil are eating our baby sisters alive. Let’s GET UP in their behalf, encourage them, and draw out our swords and fight for them. As often as you can, make your comment to all of them instead of just in reply to one of them. There will be exceptions, of course, but it’s crucial that we edify them across the board. They could all use it. You can talk to them or pray for them in your comment. Both are so Biblical and so right.

Now, listen, Little Sisters. One more thing from Big Sister with the big mouth. Get your tails in the Word. I mean it. Get your tails in the Word. NO TIME OFF. Read it aloud when you can’t absorb it or concentrate on it. Get yourself some accountability. Call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised and so shall you be saved from your enemies. Every morning.

One last thing. I left my beloved little sister with an assignment this morning and with the accountability to let me know she’s doing it. I’m going to give you little sisters who are feeling devoured the exact same one: memorize Psalm 25. Every word of it. Don’t tell me you can’t. Yes, you can. Get it printed out, laminate it, and memorize it. Say it over and over and over again. Start today. We can cheer you on and we can fight for you but we can’t fight instead of you. This victory is YOURS. The battle is meant to bring plunder directly to your personal life and family line or God wouldn’t have allowed it. Get up and fight.

Psalm 25.

I mean it.

I’m going to be asking you about it.

OK. I’m sorry for the bossy tone but I am so mad on behalf of you, our baby sisters, that I’m bruising this keyboard.

Now get busy, Girls. I have to be out of the office for a little while several times today so if we go a few hours without any comments moderated, have no fear, I’ll get back to it and get your encouragements posted.

I love you.



2,048 Responses to “Big Sisters and Little Sisters”

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  1. 301
    Tabaitha says:

    Little Sister here is overwhelmed by my past. I’m doing the Stepping Up: The Psalms of Ascents biblestudy at church right now and God is really showing me that I have a testimony. However, my past (even when I was a believer) is so full of sin that I am disgusted by that and I am ashamed to talk about my past. The great thing is God pulled me out of those trenches and I give Him all the glory. How do I move forward? How do I forgive myself?

    • 301.1
      Vera says:

      Hi Tabaitha,

      I really wanted to reply to your post. As a sister in Christ who also has hurtful things that are both from others and myself in my past, I want to encourage you that God has a plan for you, for good! He can use your story. As you are strengthened in faith it becomes your testimony, to share and encourage others. We all have a past and God knows all of it, and He still is there with us and loves us more than anyone.
      Be strengthened, dear sister, and you will be a strength for others who may need help getting out of the particular sin that you’ve experienced. Take heart, you are loved.

  2. 302
    Ruth says:

    Big sister here…(oh wait, how did that happen – I’m still supposed to be a little sister :). My heart goes out to each one of you – please know you are not alone in whatever you are struggling with. We, your big sisters have been there – in one way or another, at one time or another. We have all wrestled with God at times, asking Him why it has to be so hard. Why do relationships break? Why do we lose a loved one too soon? Why do children have to be sick? Why does the world have to be so harsh?

    So many times, when struggling with life, I have gone back to the passage in Genesis 32 – we studied it years ago in Beth’s Patriarchs study: God has told Jacob to go back to the land of his fathers. He is filled with anxiety and regret. He is uncertain about what lies ahead. Scripture tell us that “Jacob was left all alone and a man wrestled with Him until daybreak. When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. And Then the man said,” let me go for it is daybreak.” But Jacob replied, “ I will not let you go until you bless me”.

    The man was God and God blessed Jacob there in that place. I struggled with those verses for a long time – God is not the author of pain, God does not want to wound us. Why then? But then I realized that I was missing the point. Beth made this point so wonderfully in one of her Patriarch videos. Somewhere in that dark night, Jacob stopped wrestling with God and started clinging to God. Jacob held on until the blessing came. And so must we. We cling to God, knowing that He is good. We may walk with a bit of a limp in the days ahead, but we surely know that we have been blessed.

    So, little sisters, hold on until the blessing comes. It surely will. Whatever you are going through, God can bring something good from it. Know that we are praying for you. Know that God is holding you and those that you love in the palm of His hand. You are going to make it!

  3. 303
    donna smith says:

    Big sister here!!
    Yes, I have been there! I have been there when I feel as if I have been forgotten by God and/or he is just tired of hearing from me and is no longer answering my prayers. I have been through long dry spells that parched me!
    Well I am here to tell you that he IS faithful. He doesn’t miss anything, he doesn’t forget anything and indeed it all works together for good – OUR good!!
    How do I know? Well he just got me where he wants me. He’s been bringing things together from 10 or 12 years ago and tying up the loose ends. You know those light bulb moments? I’ve been having lots of those.
    God’s been saying you remember this? When you thought I didn’t hear you, well the time had to be right, OR, you weren’t ready, OR now is the time for me to to shine a light on that for you. And I hear him chuckle as I groan in understanding!
    I hope this is making sense to you. Hang on, believe, trust, have faith. God knows all – he remembers all, and someday it will all come together and make sense. In his time, not yours. He is faithful and just!!
    Sometimes it’s about the condition of our souls, sometimes about our knowledge and understanding. We have to be ready to receive what he has for us. There are so many factors involved. Again I say stay with him, pray, study. Be with the right people, do the right thing. Keep on keepin on, and when all is right it will make sense!!
    God bless you little sis. Big hugs from me to you! God loves you so much and he is so proud to be your daddy!! Don’t let go! I love you too!!

  4. 304
    Sister Lynn says:

    I turn 40 tomorrow… so
    Big Sister here:
    You are SO LOVED and being prayed for even as I write this.
    His angels are encamped around you.
    He will see you through every storm… though you may be tattered and torn at the end… you will be standing on your feet on the solid rock of Christ…
    As Mama Beth said… stay in the Word. love to all!

  5. 305

    I’m a LITTLE sister…and I just want to first say that I want you to know mama beth that you, and quite a few of the sweetest older siestas through Jesus have loved me so well.
    I mean I have been in the darkest season I’ve ever known, and half insecure to wonder if I might have sent that email you spoke of…but then I thought if it seems overwhelming then imagine the person going through it.
    I just spoke with my father who is driving up to NJ to make a decision to cut off the breathing tube for my grandpa. My mom just came out of the hospital yesterday finally after practically 2 months…and I’ve had to be the strong one in everything. My family doesn’t know Jesus. But I want you to know I’m okay, but just very brokenhearted after so much that has happened. But I do have a praise in this. My big sis/mentor/friend since 9th grade is spending time with me tomorrow at the beach, and I dearly need it.
    I’m not really asking for advice, just to continue to love me the way all of y’all have, and pray for me to just seek after Him with everything I know, and to become the woman He wants me to be. I love you guys!


    • 305.1

      My grandpa died this morning. My dad was up there in PA
      last night but his family said visiting hrs were over.
      My heart breaks for my dad. Grandpa never showed he loved
      him. But to get all the way there and not even
      get to say good-bye. I’m sorry but it’s messed up.
      It’s really messed up. Please pray for my family.
      This season has been the worst.

  6. 306
    Tanisha Grant says:

    This little sister is 29 years old and I need of prayer and advice. It seems that my family and I have been overwhelmed with financial burdens, and feelings of betrayal from friends and family. I am in need of encouragement prayer and just help with forgiveness.

  7. 307
    bethany says:

    Your little sister here: Tell me, does it get any easier to love yourself? I’m in the word and trying to follow God’s commandments but it seems as if I always fall short!

  8. 308
    Amanda Carter says:

    Your little sister here needs prayers. I am 30 years old and in the middle of a nasty divorce from an alcoholic who wants to take me to court in regards to visitation. I am scared for my kids and what our future holds. I know God has it all under control, but the enemy likes to cause doubts and fear.

  9. 309
    Catrina says:

    Little sister here:

    Satan is destroying my family. My husband has been abusive for 11 years, now I have a 4 year old son and no way out. I question where God is and fight the feeling that it’s my just dessert for some of my mistakes in life. I’m burned out, depressed, depleted and longing for safety and love. I’m lost.

    • 309.1
      Beth says:

      My beloved little sister, please make phone calls today to some women’s shelters that are near or in your city. There are marvelous resources for women if you’ll start seeking them immediately. Oh, yes, darling, there is a way out of an abusive home and there is also hope that, while you withdraw from the abusive loved one for your own safety and for the safety of your son, that God can heal him as well. If he is truly abusive – and I believe you when you say that he is – get yourself and your son into safety right away. May God give you the strength to stand up and walk away with your son to a safe distance and may He bring restoration in months and years to come that bring Him much glory and all of you much good.

      Ladies, please read the classic Dobson book, “Love Must Be Tough.” He helps you understand that you’re not helping the unhealthy loved one by letting him or her get away with abusive behavior. It’s not love in their best interest. Love in best interest can indeed draw boundaries. I know this is so hard but we are stronger in Christ than we ever imagined.

    • 309.2
      Rebecca says:

      I am praying for strength for you. I have been in an abusive relationship before. its a little different I was only 19 and pregnant and in love. I was not marriage but we was together for 2 years. when I ended up pregnant he beat me so bad that I was hospitalized for a couple week and lost my child. and was beaten so bad I did not recognize myself in the mirror. I still loved him. but he ran so he would not get in trouble with the law. I was miles away from home I was in Chicago and home is tennessee. I knew no one but him. cause we only lived there for a few months. I would had went back to him but he had packed up our stuff and left. left me with nothing. I ended up being homeless ( this was 17 years ago I never heard of a woman shelter then but there are out there and they can protect you and your child.and take care of you. please find one ) I kept telling myself if I just wouldn’t make him mad …if I just would do what he wanted. be who i should be for him. that it would get better. sister it will not no matter how Good you are only Himself and God can change him and you need to be safe. Beloved I will keep you in my prayers and please be careful. and know that no matter what he says sister there is NO NO i Say NO REASON for anyone to be abusive I love you sister praying

  10. 310
    kerry says:

    Big Sister here:

    Little Sister and Sister Beth:
    Be encouraged to read the heart wrenching writing of Charles Spurgeon:” Spurgeon on Depression”
    I’ts old English and so poetic. But so REAL

    go to Haven Today website and look under “Going Deeper”

  11. 311
    Jess says:

    LITTLE sister here needing some encouragement. Just moved from Texas to ATL, things are going well except for ONE thing. I am not in the Word. I am so busy with planning my wedding next month, trying to get to the bank, fitting in a work-out, spending time with my fiance who lives an hour away… I’m so tired in the morning, forget to read at night. I used to be SO DILIGENT about it and now it rarely happens. I want to soak in all the preparation the Lord has for me before I get married!

    • 311.1
      Terrie says:

      From a big sister. In recent years I have realized that ALL my days are busy, and I always have more I SHOULD do than I can get done in a day. I have learned to put the most important things first in my day. Still have far from go to get my home organized and and get as much done as I want to each day, BUT I have been consistent with Bible reading and Bible study most mornings for a year or 2 now. Even if you are not a morning person, I would recommend getting up just a little earlier than usual to make time for God’s Word. It is your lifeline, and will help you to be more peaceful and effective as you get through your busy days.

      Taking even a few minutes to read in God’s Word each morning makes such a difference. I don’t always manage to read my Bible again before I fall into bed at night, but reading my Bible and Bible study are now part of my usual morning routine. Routines do make things easier! Have been blessed by in learning to better manage my time as well as my household.

      Tried to post this Saturday night after work, but lost my internet connection. Praying for you, and for all of us who struggle with balance in our schedules, and making time for what’s MOST important.

  12. 312
    Brittney says:

    Little sister here….

    Struggling with believing that God is good even when He withholds protection from those He loves. Sometimes it feels He only loves me because He has too. I know that’s not true, but it feels that way.

  13. 313
    Angie says:

    Little sister here… I found out one year ago that my husband cheated on me on 4 separate occasions, all occurring 9 years ago, if that matters. How do I get past that? Or do I even have to? This past year has been the worst of my entire life. There are two small children involved also. I have prayed and prayed and prayed…. He was backslidden (sp) at the time, but Im not sure I buy that as an excuse. Anyway, I want to do the right thing for God and my children, but at the same time I don’t feel that I’ll ever be able to get past this…

  14. 314
    Zoe says:

    Little Sister here….
    I am struggling…so new to my faith and learning to trust God. Yet my whole world is falling apart. I’m fighting insecurities, addiction, my marriage of 16 years has crumbled and washed away by the rough surf of life. I was ready to write my husband a letter and grab my children and leave tonight,and I read this post. I need prayers and direction, because I feel like I’m drowning, and the enemy is winning…..I’m so defeated. I don’t know who to turn to and trust for support, since I’ve been betrayed by everyone.
    I want to be strong, I can’t pass this mess to my children. I feel forsaken.

    • 314.1
      Mindy says:

      Big sister here praying specifically for you, Zoe. Live today and obey what you know to be God’s will for you (love and be kind to your children, work cheerfully at whatever is before you, show respect to your husband by your words and actions, read in God’s word -a verse, chapter, whatever you can manage-pray in faith and believe that God can do what He says He can do!) Isaiah 41:13 says,”I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, ‘Do not be afraid, I will help you.'” Many a day I have started with my right hand held high waiting for Him to take it and lead me. Trust and obey today.

  15. 315
    Melissa says:

    Hi, little sister 39 years young…
    Married 12 years, husband self employed 11 years. Three kids, fourth on the way. Recently lost our home of nine years, city I have lived in for 21 years, and countless communities and relationships, and driving distance to our parents and families. Moved 900 miles to another large city for a job for hubby when business declined by 50% and many decisions fell together to create problems. I offered to work again and even found a job opening like one I had left. Hubby and kids tell me they want me at home, but won’t stop me. I love my husband, and growing up a product of divorce and infidelity remain committed to marriage. I know God is good. He is in this full on. I am missing my friendly, friends, midwife, and communities. I believe God honors obedience to his commands. I obeyed my husband and followed. We are blessed here. I just get scared, overwhelmed, and lonely…praying for strengthening for our immediate family, comfort for the kids, and friendships for all of us. For me to forgive my husband for allowing his business to become such a mess to get in such a desperate place. Loving Jesus. The one and only who saves.

  16. 316
    L says:

    Little Sister Here:

    I’m 25 with a sweet 10 month old baby girl and an awesome husband of 3 years. I see God’s mercies and blessings each day and yet, I still struggle with comparison to others and discontentment. I pray that I would be content in all circumstances, however it is so difficult for me to just sit and rest in the Lord. I am always prone to think, “if only I had this…” (I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way. Amen?!)

  17. 317
    Tammy says:

    Big sister here…when you feel like you cant hold on any longer take a deep breath and cry out to Jesus. Surround yourself with scripture and praise music, fill your mind with truth not fiction. when you cant find the words to pray borrow someone elses, like Beth’s book praying GOd’s Word or get out of that pit or K Ladds The Power of a positive mom. and dont forget even in the darkest moment look for His presence and His love. look for it and be thankful for something, anything.
    when my 4 in 5years kiddos would drive me to the edge Phil 4:4-7 would bring me peace.

    Phil 4:4-6 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
    praying for you all.

  18. 318
    Alicia says:

    A little sister here…The biggest area where I struggle, and I know it is the enemy’s fault, is my husband’s lack of leadership in our home. I am 31 and he is 33. We have been married for 9.5 years, and we have an almost 5 year-old son. My husband and I are born-again Christians, but he absolutely has never led our family. Anytime I say anything about it, he just shuts down. I think he struggles with how to lead because of his own father, who was worthless. My husband has a job that requires a schedule that is horrible for having much family time, yet he will not look for anything else. I am so angry sometimes because God didn’t call me to be the leader of our home, but I have no other choice. If I didn’t do and control everything or tell him what to do, everything would be in shambles. Any advice on what to do/how to help him? I’ve considered counseling, but we couldn’t go due to his work schedule! Thanks!

    • 318.1
      Terrie says:

      Alicia, praying for you and all of us who struggle with this. I know I often have stepped in and tried to control things in our household because my husband was slow to step up or did not step up and take care of things that were important. The hard truth is that you cannot change him. The only person you can successfully change is yourself. I highly recommend that you go to Christian counseling without your husband to help you deal with your side of this. If he ever decides to join you in counseling, great! Victorious Christian Living is a wonderful group that provided free or low-cost counseling in our area, not sure if they have one in your area. God has shown me that I need to step back sometimes, and give my husband the opportunity to lead. It is so hard sometimes to know when to step up and when to wait! I know I have hurt my husband with my criticism and am trying to learn to be more patient and loving.

      • Alicia says:

        Thank you Terrie! I probably should go to counseling myself.

      • Rachel says:


        Pray, Pray, Pray for your husband in the area of leadership and encourage him. Build hime up with words. I know this can be hard and sometimes you may not feel like it it working but it takes time and it will help in time. The books captivating and Wild at heart helped both my husband and I. If he has not read Wild at Heart then get it for him and hopefully he will read it and even you can read it and see the things that men deal with on a daily basis. Continue to read 1 Corinthians 13 and truly live it out! Praying for you sister!

  19. 319
    Juli says:

    Big sister here coming with her gloves on ready for a fight! As a recovering control freak, & one who is in the midst of her own chaos & struggle, here is the encouragement I bring:

    He is NOT through with you yet! Just because you cannot see the horizon doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Just because the clouds have been covering His Presence doesn’t mean He’s not there. God is alive & active in each of your lives, waiting patiently for you to let go so He can do His job. Let Him do His job.

    ‘Noone who puts their trust in You will ever be disgraced. But disgrace comes to those who try to deceive others’ (Psalm 25:3, NLT – I’m memorizing it too!)

    Gloves off, Girls! Let’s fight!

  20. 320
    Amy says:

    Little sister here…I struggle daily with my self worth and my purpose in life. I am a 37 year old single woman who has never been married. I have had a longing in my heart forever to meet the man of my dreams and have a family. As the time ticks away, I feel that will never happen. I am overweight and struggle daily with losing weight and actually liking myself. I have good days and bad as I know everyone does. There are some days that my feelings of lack of purpose and worth overcomes me with grief. I feel like I am looked down upon because I don’t have a husband or children. People often wonder what is wrong with me because I am alone. There are days that I wonder if I make any difference on this earth. I ask for prayer often from friends, but I think it is hard for them to understand how I really feel. Thank you for listening. I want my life to shine with Jesus’ love.

  21. 321
    Joan says:

    Your little sister her is struggling with people discouraging Gods call on my life. He has called me to foster care and while I am doing it and I think as best as I can, my in laws are negative about it at every turn. I want to know how you get past those closest to you duscouraging you.

  22. 322
    Renee says:

    Little sister here…

    Married 8 years, 2 kids, in ministry. Dealing with intense sexual temptation.

  23. 323
    Pat says:

    Your big sister here,saying with puddles in her eyes, oh yes, dear siters,I have been there. And I know I will be there again but each time, I learn that God never leaves me; even when I can’t feel or hear Him. Loving friends prayed for me even when I didn’t know it–they held up me when I couldn’t pray. I remember when I hurt so bad, I hated being in public because I saw others going about their day and I wanted to shout, “DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND, MY LIFE IS IN RUINS!! HOW CAN YOU JUST GO ABOUT YOUR DAY!” I hated turning on the radio because songs would sear me–feeling that I didn’t have love or that I never would feel happy again. In time those days did pass, God made me stronger and showed me things I would never have understood if I hadn’t walked through the pain. As I come back to this blog, I will stop to pray for all the little sisters who post here–to NOT let the enemy triumph over you! Love to you.

  24. 324
    Rebecca says:

    I your little sister……im 24 and have struggled with anxiety all my life, the last few weeks things with my family(sister, brother inlaw,niece, and nephew) have goten pretty bad, im worried for my niece and nephew and don’t know what my role is in everything. Its affecting the rest of the family as well. Boy my sisters I can use some encuragement! I love you all!!!!

  25. 325
    Meghan says:

    Little sister here — living the dream is threatening to consume when I am mama to 2 small kids, my own business in a high powered profession, in charge if making most of the money & paying all the bills. It’s like a visual flower — all arrows point to me to get it done. I think if I just make enough money to help my family then all will be well. My failure to do so fails my family. Ready to stop being the flower CEO.

  26. 326
    Mary Ellen says:

    Little sister here: I am single, and with the sudden, recent loss of my dad am an orphan, true I am 29 but an orphan nonetheless. I am blessed with two brothers & a good number of friends, but to be expected they have their own lives. I seem to be in a season where it feels like the hits just keep on coming. I am actively pursuing community, because my natural inclination is to turn inward and isolate myself. I know that in James we are told to consider trials a “great joy” and that they produce endurance. To be completely honest I do not know how to articulate what I need right now, partly because I am not 100% sure what kind of encouragement would be helpful.

  27. 327
    patricia says:

    Little sister here, my mom always taught me if you could.count.on one hand your very best friends , you have been truly.blessed. My very best friend is dying and I know all the “right answers” and I know she is heaven bound but my heart heart is in pieces

  28. 328
    Stefani says:

    Little sister here……. I am a first time mama to a beautiful 7mo old little girl. I am having a difficult time balancing it all – time for my baby, my husband, work, myself, study and prayer time, chores…… The list can go on. Please tell me it gets better. Please tell me that what I’m doing MATTERS. I’m feeling pretty insignificant.

    • 328.1
      Terrie says:

      It does get better! Hang in there. Raising your family for Jesus matters more than anything else in this world.

      I have also had trouble with balance, even as a stay-at-home mom for 18 years now. Homeschooling and then a part-time job the past 3 years have made things even more challenging. Not where I want to be yet, but still learning at age 42. has been a huge blessing to me.

      Learning to take a few minutes at the start of my day for Bible study and Bible reading has helped immensely. I’ve learned that’s most important, and that if I don’t do it first, it is hard to get to it. It is now part of my morning routine, and is my lifeline! Praying for you, and all of us who struggle with balance in this busy world.

  29. 329
    Teri says:

    Your little sister here is really struggling with being obedient to God. I tend to be a control person and while I have relinquished control in certain areas to God, there are still a few big ones that I have not surrendered completely to Him and I want to. I still have a struggle with my identity being wrapped up in my position within the corporation I am at, rather than in who I am as a child of the Most High God. I am struggling to know who I am at my core and to believe that God can truly use me for His purposes and that He truly loves me as broken and flawed as I am. Has anyone else struggled with this? Thanks, Beth, for this opportunity!

  30. 330

    Big sister here, just responding to all the posts by little sisters here. big sisters, we need you to respond! my heart goes out to you all. maybe because I saw myself in so many of these posts. I am 53 and my life is not easier, but I KNOW THE LORD A LOT BETTER! He taught me about himself in each “storm” that blew my way. memorize huge chunks of scripture. Psalm 25 was one of the first that I burned into my brain. and Psalm 27 was the second. slowly chewing scripture as I worked on memorizing it was one of the most healing things I’ve ever done. and stay studying it. These WORDs girls are the ONLY thing that heals those down deep scars that we all have.

  31. 331
    Liz says:

    Hi there. Littled sister here at age 38, I first want to say Thank You to Beth, I recently read So Long insecurity, I also have many of the same issues that were in the book. I am speaking with God learning his was but I do not have many female friends. So here is my list to help me pray about and to send up to God.

    I worry & stress almost about everything in my life (insecurity) I have said and done things so wrong in my relationship that I thank goodness have stopped but I have still hurt the one I love and I know he is my person the love of my life (Dylan) I want God to help guide us and to mend the broken dark pit areas.

    I am not this girl and she was abused and I had to finally admit to being a victim which was the hardest thing in the world to admit. God is great and I thank him everyday I am learning and getting better. I am pushing not to sin and asking for forgiveness and guidance in all areas in my life. But I miss my smiling loveable man who has always been there for me, I seem to hurt and push him away. Please help Thank You


  32. 332
    melanie says:

    Big Sister Here~ Before I get out of bed in the morning i say over and over “this is the day that the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it!” And i pray for Godly wisdom for the day and for the Holy Spirit to direct my thoughts, words and deeds. I begin the day with God as soon as i wake up.

  33. 333
    Kim Trivette says:

    Little sister here. . . I need encouragement to stay patient and hopeful for that phone call for a teaching position. It has been two years since I received my teaching degree and still no classroom. I need to remember that God’s timing is always perfect. I pray that I made the right decisions in my career for my family. I know that God has a purpose for this struggle, but I find it hard to be positive and not show my worries.

  34. 334
    Elizabeth says:

    little sister-struggling with concepts from books like radical, 7 and the James study Biblical principals of caring for the poor/ spending etc. don’t store up treasures on earth but store up treasures in heaven. i know from His word He loves a “cheerful giver” and that it’s better to give than to receive and that we are to GIVE to HONOR HIM! I was brought up to “tithe” and to give above it. How much is too much? I want to honor God in giving but I don’t want to live a pauper. I like ice cream and mint colored jeans. Is that selfish and un-balanced? (I know I’m selfish apart from His grace ; 0 ) I don’t want to feel I “have” to give but that I want to give. I know giving is personal and there is no magic number that fits us all. I know He is the greatest and the only thing that will truly satisfy. I ask for prayer that I will willingly honor and desire to honor God in giving-spending and in everything. And for peace/wisdom on still enjoying the temporal things of this world.

  35. 335
    Cindy Childers says:

    Little Siesta Here…… I am 38 years old. Pregnant with my third precious baby. (Thank you Lord) Due in November. My husband, Clark, deploys with the US Navy to Afghanistan in October. He also missed the birth of our #2 as he was in the UAE. I am praying for strength for the next year, a wonderful pregnancy & delivery, Clark’s safety and just peace overall. And I really really really need a spiritual mentor. God has put this on my heart for years (I’ve been doing in depth bible study for 15 years now). I’ve never had a mentor but so desperately want someone that I can share hurts/disappointments and gain encouragement from. I need this so much right now. Most of my family are not followers of Christ so I would love a spiritual Mama to be in my life. Thank You Beth for doing this. I really needed it. Love to you all Siestas, Cindy

    • 335.1
      Casey says:

      I went through two pregnancies alone and 1 delivery alone. I won’t sugar coat and say it is easy because it isn’t. But I do know God takes care of the details. My best advice is get plugged in a womans Bible study somewhere. The times in life when I can see I grew the most was during those deployments when I lived in Bible Studies and communed with other women. We are scattered all over the world and still keep in touch 10 years later!

  36. 336
    Deb says:

    Little sister here …. In the battle for 6yrs with unexplained infertility. Bunch of family & friends are having their 1st, 2nd, or 3rd baby. Even had friends that were healed after yrs of infertility. Husband & I are believing in our miracle. Praying for patience & faith in God’s power.

  37. 337
    Sara H says:

    Your little sister here: Just need to know that I am doing something right! My mom has been gone for more than 15 years & has never laid Earthly eyes on any of my 3 girls. No one has ever stepped in to speak words of wisdom or encouragement. (This is good in a way, I guess, because it has forced me to look to my Father for those needs.) One thing I have determined in her absence is that every time I get a chance to encourage one younger than me I do simply because I know what it’s like to be without.

  38. 338
    kdp says:

    Your little sister here … following God’s great and continuos healing from the inside out… this little sister finally shed the 130 pound that masked my pain for years. Trying now to live in victory daily over addictive patterns and protective habits. Harder than anticipated. Leaning into His arms. Needing Big sister wisdom in this new found world of navigating the realities of being a woman in regard to outer beauty. Understanding it comes from within, but wrestling with the reality of being 38, single, and hoping to be attractive yet always honoring to my Lord. Do I also shed the potatoe sack? What appropriate beauty look like? Finding I am so fearful all the time. Struggle with the inner hope that the right man in Gods time will indeed be attracted, but worried about how to dress/etc. Just trying to be honest. Oh big sis…this road is scary. Praying and reading… but woman to woman… practical godly wisdom so needed.

    • 338.1
      N.L. says:

      KDP — your little sister here,

      Just wanted to jump up and down with you over your weight loss. Two years ago, through Breaking Free, I lost 60 pounds. I’m still walking in victory over my addiction to food (and I’m at a healthy weight for the first time since middle school). Please head this advice: GIRL, get rid of the potato sack!! We both know clothes are just thread and cotton – not worth hoarding or stressing over – but I know I feel better when I wear quality clothes that fit right. There’s nothing wrong with liking the way you look; I believe God wants his girls to have healthy confidence and self-esteem.

      As I was losing weight (and when I hit my goal), my mom took me out and bought me new clothes that were flattering, more fitted, and really darn cute (and modest). Ann Taylor Loft is one of my go-to stores for grown-up clothes that fit well and don’t look fuddy duddy.

      Most of all though, I really believe learning to carry myself differently was essential. I figured if getting in the Word helped me shed the weight, the Word could also teach me to walk in confidence. Again and again, I found verses that said “Lift up your head.” Maybe sometimes the Word was figurative, but there’s something to the literal application of it. Pull your shoulders back. Keep your head held high. And maybe this isn’t an issue for you – but when men smile at you, smile back. I think I lived under a cloud of rejection for so many years of my life that it showed in the way I carried myself — I walked with my shoulders slumped and my eyes downcast. The enemy convinced me (for many reasons besides just my weight) that I didn’t (and don’t) deserve a good man. But that’s such a stupid lie. Don’t let a hiss like that occupy one iota of your brain space. Say your scripture out loud: you are loved, beautiful, blessed, forgiven and free.

      I’m cheering for you!

  39. 339
    robinmac23 says:

    Little sister here – struggling with depression, anxiety … everything seems completely overwhelming right now. As a wife and mom, I want to be at my best but a lot if the time I’m just not. This stage of life is CRA-ZY with games, practices, church activities, schoolwork, and on and on. Sometimes I just feel like I’m drowning and this is supposed to be fun!

  40. 340
    Debbie says:

    Little sister here….I am struggling with a few things and greatly could use strength and encouragement. I am a single mother with no family or help from the father. I have no strong base of fellowship here and am exhausted from working full time, going to two different colleges, and raising the children. I remain active in my church and do plenty of Bible study and reading here at home. But I find I fall off every couple of months or so due to just feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Even though I know that is when I need God the most. I crave fellowship, time with other women, and a stronger bond with the Lord…more time with Him. I just feel I fail in all areas sometimes. I also have a struggle with one of my daughters. She has a lot of anger built up in her and we go back and forth at times arguing and it breaks my heart. I need patience and understanding in how to deal with her and make things better. I just feel lost and sometimes like I just can never find the answers or the way…no matter how much I cry or pray.

  41. 341
    Jessica says:

    I’m a Big Sister, barely by age (40) and a mom to 6 kids all under 10 years old. I KNOW 24/7 !!!! and after reading all the little sis comments my greatest impression was to encourage you that waiting on the Lord (for financial answers, for spiritual friend answers, for finding a home church answers) is a GOOD thing, a GREAT thing. I want to encourage you as you pray and wait, to ENJOY the waiting, sit with it, have peace with it and KNOW that God hears and He will answer in His time. Our job is to pray, seek and wait. It took me a long time to learn that waiting is GOOD and right when we want to hear God.

  42. 342
    JennyBC says:

    Big Sister Here… Oh sweet little sisters, I know where you are! If I can encourage you to know we have been there. Pray, pray, pray! Know that you are loved and count every single solitary blessing you can in the midst of the hard things. I mean list them, say them out loud, look everywhere and be amazed at the things you never saw before. It will lift your spirit and encourage you to see how God makes Himself known all around you. Praying for you ladies his week.

  43. 343
    Michele says:

    Big sister here – I am 44 years old. My parents divorced when I was in 3rd grade. My mother lost our home due to financial problems when I was 16. I didn’t have many friends in high and a friend I did have was killed in a car accident on my 18th birthday. My husband’s best friend died in a tragic accident five months before our wedding. I have suffered with back pain since I was 18. My daughter, 19 years old, was born with a medical condition (she is fine now). I miscarried my 2nd child and gave birth to my son 1 ½ years later. Friendships have come and gone. Depression and anxiety seemed to over take me at times. 9 years ago my mother was diagnosed with leukemia and I was diagnosed with a chronic pain – that pain has subsided over the past few years. My extended family has gone through a relational upset three years ago that still leave some bitter and uneasy. Five years ago I was in a car accident that could have made my family’s life quite lonely and difficult. Raising a teen age girl has its ‘fun’ times. Recently I was diagnosed with an auto immune disease. This seems exhausting reading this; why list it all? Because through all of this turmoil and sadness, GOD IS STILL GOD! He is in all these details, wanting me to continue to trust only in Him to be my strength and give me wisdom. No matter what – He is the LORD! No matter what the worse is, He still provides, comforts, strengthens, heals. It is not what I did or didn’t do – it is who He is and always will be. Can we praise Him no matter what? What ever your biggest problem/situation/sin may be, can you still praise Him? That is what He calls us to do. In the midst of praising Him we find ourselves trusting in the triune God who is faithful when we are faithless. Our God, who can not lie, who will fulfill His promises, who forgives as far as the east is from the west, whose love is immeasurable. Our God who is our victory! Hold fast, it’s a bumpy ride, but with God we will one day have a smooth landing into His loving arms. Keep trusting – He is worth it!

  44. 344
    Ashley says:

    Your Little Sister here…
    I. Am. Overwhelmed!
    My husband and I own a business…we are together 24/7…I love him dearly but 24/7 is a huge challenge. Business is slow…I’m responsible for sales and marketing so the financial strain falls on me…it’s extremely overwhelming. We have all of our life savings in this business so it HAS to work…with God ALL things are possible! I struggle with believing and trusting when things look and feel so grim. When my husband discusses the business, it feels like negativity and criticism because it’s his life savings and I’m not producing the numbers/sales like we need…and he talks about it 24/7. I am mentally beaten down, exhausted, and very overwhelmed!
    Thank you, in advance, for your encouragement and prayers!

  45. 345
    Wendy says:

    I am a little sister who needs encouragement with…..remembering to pray continuously throughout the day; for being pregnant with my second baby that I prayed for, yet feeling so exhausted and short with my first and thinking it will only get worse after the baby comes; and for constantly feeling unsettled with our living situation and thinking that life will get turned upside down at any given moment due to my husband’s job situation.

  46. 346
    Shelly F says:

    Your Little Sister here…
    My sweet daughter, Amie, passed away almost 4 years ago. I thought I was healing but lately I have been so angry, irratable, about so much. My patience has been lacking and I have not felt like doing much. I feel like I am drowning at times. I go through the day “doing what is expected of me” but not feeling the true joy.

  47. 347
    Stacey says:

    Big sister here- I have read about my little sisters this evening and wept, my heart broken. HANG on to Jesus girls! Beth is sooooooo right, GET IN THE WORD! MEMORIZE it. Know God’s truth (start with the truth that applies to your current situation). The only way to use your sword is to utter the words out loud! Sometimes over & over & over again and just when you think you’re done you utter God’s word again! The OTHER side is WELL worth the “hell on earth” but you have to fight the good fight to get there! YOU CAN DO IT! To believe otherwise is to believe a lie of the Enemy. You’re smart girls and you’re tougher than you think you are because you have God on your side – NOTHING is impossible AND I MEAN NOTHING!!!

  48. 348
    Janice says:

    Big sister here…my friends and I were just talking about how overwhelming life is…we’re doing ‘A heart that can break’ and unfortunately Satan can keep us so focused on all the problems in our own lives, friends, families…that we can miss the big picture. I just can’t wait for Jesus to come back. But, in the meantime we need to make that very hard choice to see the good, the God that is all around us. Just this week alone, hearing about marriages that have broken, cancer in young women and children, not having money to cover the bills….is so heartbreaking. Several years ago on the day I was diagnosed with cancer (stage3 breast ) I stood in the kitchen scared and numb, thinking of my 3 precious little girls and my husband, their dad, who was/is an alcoholic….and I looked on the daily calendar and there it was…the verse that God had put there, on that calandar, in that printing house, a year or more before that very day. It was Joshua 1:9 “have I not commanded you, BE STRONG and of good courage, do not be afraid, nor be dismayed for the lord your God is with you WHEREVER you go’. I ripped that page off and carry it with me everywhere. Since then struggles of this sin drenched world have threatened to consume me…and that is when I go through all the things God has shown me, things He put in place for that very day when you would need it. Get reading, looking, thanking Him for what He has promised and that you know He will do…look all around you, put up a verse on the bathroom mirror, on the door where you’ll see it before you leave the house. Everyday bad things happen, but God was there before you, preparing hope for us in advance! My cousin and I were driving along a 6 lane road while I was telling her “relaxe, God is on control, over and over. She was in such a bad state (possible cancer, loss of job,…) and a van pulled in front of us…with a bumper sticker that said “relaxe, God is in control”…I said “if God went to all that trouble to put that van right in front of us shouldn’t that tell you how much He cares? “in this world we will have trouble” that’s a certainty, but “he has overcome the world” In the words of a very dear and gifted teacher “God is who he says he is, God can do what He says He can do, I am who God says I am, I can do all things through Christ, Gods word is alive and active in me, I’M BELIEVING GOD’ so stay strong little sisters, you are fighting a winning battle! Xoxo

  49. 349
    Cindy says:

    Your little sister here needs a different job, my job has become a huge burden for me. It seems to be sucking the joy out of me.
    I could use some encouragement.
    I know that God has a plan, and He is in control, but sometimes it gets overwhelming.

  50. 350
    Kristin says:

    Your little sister here …27 and So far from the strong, victorious , God fearing woman I knew myself to be.. I’ve fallen into things that I NEVER would have dreamed would be a part of my life and every time I sip the air at the top of the water that covers my head I get pushed back under. A tear falls at the trapped nature of my circumstance and the hopelessness its bringing. I have no choice but to play along with the world and be strong or I will be dragged to the bottom .. please don’t pray for strength as I am tired of being strong .. Please pray for a little sister that only needs to feel God and I’ll hold on to Him as my raft as long as I need to ! I want to read Psalm 25 and not feel numb! Thank you for your love and allowing a place to poor out

    • 350.1
      Shelly says:

      Yes! That is exactly how I feel. I am so tired of being strong. I just want to be that child of God and rest in His arms.

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