This morning I woke up thrilled to have gotten a solid four hours of sleep but completely unaware that the day before me would prove to be one of the most momentous days of my life. Today we visited the slums that have arguably made Calcutta so famous. Just when I thought I had seen poverty in its purest form, we took a giant leap into a whole different echelon. I should warn you in advance that I am a sloppy mess today. My hard heart finally broke today and it spilled itself all over the streets of Calcutta.
First, we headed to the program site where several hundred bright-eyed children greeted us, fifty of whom do not have sponsors yet. Almost all of the children at this site are from the slums. This group of children brought me unspeakable joy. My heart hurt when we had to leave them. Check some of them out.
After playing with the kids, our team then set out for our home-visits in the slums. During the home-visits we go along with several of the Compassion children and we survey their living conditions and listen to their stories. Most of all, we get to inquire to our heart’s content about how Compassion’s child sponsorship program has changed their lives. So, we parked our van and huddled around Spence, as he warned us with unusual sobriety that we needed to be extremely careful taking pictures in the slums. We were informed that had the Compassion India field staff not accompanied us, we could have been in danger walking in the slums. So, with this slightly unsettling piece of information, we made our way through and we saw unimaginable things right before our eyes.
People half naked bathing with filthy water on the uneven and trash-infested streets. Pre-teen prostitutes with painted faces hanging out of a door in the red-light district just to make as little as 50 cents per “job”. A six-month old infant lying alone on a bed in a shack without any supervision *for the entire day* since both his parents are out working daily labor jobs and living desperately from hand to mouth. These are the kinds of things people try to keep themselves from admitting actually exist. But they do.
Seven out of ten of us climbed and packed ourselves into the home of Kiran Mallik, a precious twelve-year old girl who melted all our hearts like butter. The other three couldn’t fit. It was the tiniest little shack I have ever seen, if you could even call it a shack. It was considerably smaller than a twin bed. A family of five lives in it. Here is
Pete bending over to look inside:
One more time in case you’re skimming this post, a family of five lives in this shack. It certainly isn’t the filthiest of the shacks we saw in the slums but we were hard-pressed to understand how five people could even fit it in at one time since we were all kneeled down very uncomfortably. And then we found out that some of the family actually sleeps on the streets at night because there simply is not enough room. Here is a picture of Kiran standing outside her house. Look at her smile. Talking about stealing the heart of you.
We kneeled around and listened to Kiran tell her story through a translator. Her beaming smile and joyous spirit were enough to distract from the oppressive heat. She told us about how she loves to study, how much she loves Jesus, and how she wants to be a teacher someday.
And then she asked us, her guests, with a genuine smile on her face as though she was taking us on a tour of her mansion:
“How do you like my house?”
Can you remember what it felt like to break up with your first love? Okay, now multiply that by about a million. It was like a dagger in my heart. I didn’t just want to cry. I wanted to completely lose it. But I joined in with the rest of the team, who were likely feeling the same way, and we all said, “We love it. It is beautiful.”
And I thought of the times that I’ve told my husband I don’t want to have a certain couple over to our apartment because our dining room table isn’t big enough. I thought of the times that I’ve been “ashamed” to invite friends into our home because it isn’t fancy enough or we don’t have enough chairs or our sofa isn’t comfortable enough. The countless times I’ve complained about the paint color on the walls.
There I was. A Compassion sponsor. Being mentored by a Compassion child on what is really important in life. I realized that we often assume people are completely hopeless just because they don’t have the material wealth that we deem necessary for a quality life. But sometimes those who are in the most difficult circumstances know best of all where to find hope. Kiran sure did. She had hope because through God’s grace via Compassion International she has a safe place to learn, to get a hot meal, and to hear more about Jesus.
Two seconds away from completely losing it:
I’ve often wondered how an average middle class American becomes a social activist. I think I’m beginning to understand. I’m not saying that I am one. I’ve already admitted, I’m just not that brave. What I am saying is something similar to what N.T. Wright said in Simply Christian, “The world in its present state is out of tune with God’s ultimate intention.” Today as I walked through the slums in Calcutta something rose up with protest in my soul with a resounding “NO!” This is not the way it is supposed to be.
“The cry for justice in the world, then, must be taken up and amplified by the Christian church, as the proper response to the voice of the living God. The gospel of Jesus Christ and the power of the Spirit indicate that there are ways forward…Christians should be energetic in advocating and pursuing that justice for which all human beings long and which burst upon the world, in a fresh and unexpected way, through Jesus.” (N.T. Wright, Simply Christian, 228)
When I was asked to go along on this trip to Calcutta, the honest truth is that I wasn’t jumping out of my skin with excitement. I really was too busy at work to be taking a week and a half off and I knew it would put more stress on me when I got back. But here was the rub: I was studying James 1:27 at the time. You know that really inconvenient verse that defines true religion before God our Father as looking after orphans and widows in their distress. The way I would apply this verse is that we are to look and care for the most vulnerable people groups in our local communities and of our world at large. There was no denying that the children in the slums of Calcutta qualified as some of the most oppressed and vulnerable people in our world. I’ve learned a whole lot about James 1:27 from reading commentaries, periodicals, and whathaveyou; but I will tell you that I have learned just as much if not more about the scope of the verse from actually entering into conversation with the real flesh and blood reality of poverty and social oppression. From actually touching the children from the slums and being touched by them.
Today one of the children grabbed my hand and when she let go, I didn’t want her to. In that moment I felt I needed her as much as she needed me. The Scriptures are too profound just to read in isolation of the real world. They must be read and lived. To be interpreted correctly, they must be performed. The gospel of Jesus Christ is too big, too cataclysmic, to be left on the page. They should burst forth from our reality.
Tomorrow is the big day when we get to meet our sponsor children! Please do check out the posts from my fellow bloggers. Actually, they are no longer just my fellow bloggers, they’re my friends. A special bond has been forged. They are people who have dared a selfish coward to stare into the face of poverty. People who are willing to face the reality of a broken world, to have their hearts torn apart, and then to use whatever is left of it to usher in the kingdom of God here on this earth.
With Love,
Melissa
Milissa,
Sweetie, if only you could see the glow that is on your face. You are not a sloppy mess. You are positively radiant. I can see the heart wrenching love of Christ spilling out of you for these children. And oh my!
Kiran just seems to glow with joy. I am alomsot afraid to pray that I be filled with that same type of joy. I fear what I might go through to get there. How utterly selfish of me. To be so pleased at what she has as a house. Proud of it. And here I think I need to add another room and remodel this or that…
Kels
Your pre-trip prayers that God would enable you to adequately convey what you experienced have been answered. Your writing on this trip is quite literally breathtaking. It is impossible for me to read what you’re writing and not weep. Thank you for sharing this experience so eloquently. Thank you, again, for allowing your heart to be broken by the things that break God’s and then urge others to live out the Gospel message and be God’s hands and feet. You may not feel you’re cut out for this work, but God most certainly does. Thank you for sharing Kiran and her world. Her world rattles my own. Continued prayers to you all.
PRAISE THE LORD for Kiran and the Joy of the Lord in her face and in her eye… and of course in her heart.
Your post touched me today. Thank you for sharing your adventure with us. I have to say i wish i were with y’all over there. Wow, what a blessing it must be.
Groovewoman
Melissa – you can see a change in your face. Thank you for your vulnerability and honesty.
Prayer Request Siestas – I just got back from the hospital – have a kidney stone and am in horrific pain. Supposed to drink lots of water and take oral pain med and nausea med, but I can not stop vomiting – sorry to be so graphic. But all the water I have had in the last hour and a half just came up.
Please pray this passes quickly – I left pain tolerance and being able to handle this at 3 a.m. this morning.
Thank you for praying.
Wow. I cannot say more than that. Utterly speechless, Melissa. Thank you for going and writing back home about it.
My second response to this blog, What on earth are we doing? Time to make some decisions, take inventory of what is important, really look at the people and world around us. Thank you for allowing us to see through your eyes, please, I know it is an effort, but keep us posted daily if possible. Shalom
Melissa,
Thank you for your authentic heart and love – a love that only God can truly captivate us with for His Glory.
Amanda –
Just as your Mom said in her post- You, too, are following God’s will for His Kingdom. Thank you for your willingness to be on a Mission for Him in Houston and abroad.
Much love to you all!
Lea, Waxahachie, TX
Melissa
Wow, girlie, that is so….there no words to discribe what I’ve seen and heard in your pics and words, or seen on your face.
I like to look in the backfground and see what the photo is not focusing on. The one of you and a girl sitting side bye side in the white and blue chairs. Take a look again ya’ll see the littel boy similing big in the background? What a face.
We Americans are spoiled beyond beyond. We ask what’s for supper, not are we haivng supper. What will I wear today, not put on the only thing you have to put on.
Which of my many pairs of shoes do I wear today….not I hope these dont break today.
I cannot imagine leaveing my baby in a bed all day while I go to work. That is too much, it’s just too much.
Oh Lord, forgive us of our selfish over indulgence. Thank you wonderful Lord for all the things, food, clothing, homes, families and heath you and only you bestow on us.
Bless these people in this far away land, heal them, fed and cloth them but most of all dear Father, save them.
Melissa – We sponsor two children now, but as i read this post and the tears welled, I feel so convicted over my ‘but I want tile not linoleum’ and my ‘I want to eat out tonight’ and my ‘I deserve a new purse’ – what poppycock.
Lord, forgive and reform my hearing and not doing.
Praying for you, those you are with, and those you touch.
Praying for you as you meet the precious ones tomorrow.
Tami in La
I felt every last word Melissa…like I was right there. In a previous blog I stated I went to India, Rajahmundry India and was numb for three days and than I lost it too. Its like your looking at something and saying “How in the heck did this happen?” Give them a tight hug for me too…love you sweet siesta.
May God have Mercy!
I just can’t over the smile on her face. Lord that we would be that content and joyful!
I don’t have any words at all.
just sitting here and staring…
Oh, precious Jesus! Please forgive me for being worried about things that are not important. The children … you love them so! I need your heart.
The joy on Kiran’s face is totally stunning. Oh how HE must adore her. Thank you, Jesus.
And Lord, please change me.
Thank you, Melissa. Thank you for going. Thank you for letting God speak through you to tell us about your experience. Thank you for letting God work through you to be His hands and feet.
You have beautiful feet, bringing the Good News!! LOVE AND PRAYERS throughout the day (and night).
Holly
WOW! What a post! My heart is heavy and my words are stuck in my throat!
If you were next to me, I’d just sit in silence with you.
Dear Jesus, Son of God, have mercy on them and on us. In Jesus’ Love Kathy Knoblock
thank you Melissa-
praying for you
oh my word, it is so clear why God wants you there right now. You are having such an effect on my heart and soul in a way that only our God could stir up! I feel like I am on fire inside when I read your posts. Wow. I feel like I need some major prayer time and forgivness right now! Thanks for opening my heart the way you have!
I thankfully got to sob in the privacy of my living room, oh girl……this is good stuff. God ordained for you and for all of us readers! This is going to sound very southern, but I know your momma is sooooooo proud! To see our children break for the things that break God……..success as a parent in a frame! Good job Miss Beth 🙂
Love you gals!
Kelly
Clarksville, Tennessee
Melissa – the pain you describe in words is obvious all over your face. The difference in appearance in the “before the slums” and “after the slums” pictures tells the story without words.
I can only imagine as my heart is broken while not being there. It must be nearly unbearable.
Melissa,
So powerful your choice of words, “that the words of Christ should leap from the pages into reality in our lives”. Something like that. Thank you for sharing your experience w/ us.
Praying for you and the team and the people of India.
Oh Melissa, I am about 2 seconds from losing it, just from reading this post and seeing these beautiful pictures. Oh to get to experience what you are – I know you (and I also) will (would) never be the same again.
Praise God!
Sweet Melissa,
Your eyes have now seen what our (their) Father sees everyday. I’m not sure what breaks His heart more. The plight of the poor or the complacency of the rich. Lord, help us! Thanks for showing me again what is too easy to forget about. You continue to be used by God to speak His truth. Carry on.
Much love,
Jax in Alaska
One of the most profound things I’ve ever heard in church was from a Pastor who had just gotten back from India. He had some time with the Indian Pastor of a small flock, and the U.S. Pastor told him how his heart grieved over how little so many in India had. The Indian pastor responded, “Oh, but we feel sorry for you in the U.S. — because you have too much.” We have too much and I know my “wealth” blinds me. Forgive me, Lord, and enable me to take Melissa’s very real experiences to heart as I consider each day what You would like me to do. In the heartbreaking name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
Gretchen
Thousand Oaks, CA
The Journey Continues ~
Kiran is what WE CHRISTIAN'S SHOULD STRIVE TO BE!!!!! Accepting her journey with love,a smile, & a hope!!!
I can hardly see the computer screen because my eyes are filled with heartfelt tears!
I am so blessed to be able to sponsor 2 and now maybe more children! I had hoped that you would find me a family but I truly understand the dilemma!
If you happen to feel there is a family that needs sponsors ~ you have my email!!! They say that we bless the children, but I believe that THE CHILDREN BLESS US!!!
Looking forward to your next blog story. I am here uplifting you daily in prayer from California!
With "Heaven Bound" blessings,
Kim Safina
http://www.kimsafinathejourneycontinues.blogspot.com
This is how our God uses the Internet: Your heart broke in Calcutta. And we’re wading in the remnants here in the States, beholding His glory and believing He is the only One who can save from poverty, be in spiritual or physical.
Praying for you RIGHT NOW, that God would give you energy, passion and openness the last few days of your trip.
Your momma must be so proud. God is rocking.my.world through the words you and your fellow bloggers are writing. We are confronting the reality of selling our home (that could hold 125 of Kiran’s homes). I would like to feel sorry for myself. But this week as we face these decisions, God is consistently drawing me back to the pictures, the faces, and the stories of true poverty and suffering. It has empowered me to praise God whether He gives or takes away and say “Blessed Be Your Name”. Thank you for being courageous enough to go – for sharing so honestly – for reminding us of what is true and real – and for giving this spoiled American girl some much needed PERSPECTIVE on my light and momentary troubles. Grace and peace to you as you do the real work of the gospel…
Melissa,
The name Kiran means “ray” as in ray of hope or ray of the sun. What a ray she is of the Light of the world.
Praying for your team daily.
Love , Anna.
Dining room table $699
Comfy chairs & sofa $1,799
Gallon of paint $24
Heart breaking and spilling itself all over the streets of Calcutta: Priceless
You're a commercial for the Master.
Thank you for allowing us to be a small part of Calcutta and Compassion. You have moved my soul. Praying for the rest of your trip and your safe journey home.
Kiran, I like your house.
How humbling.
Oh, Melissa, there are just no words. You are your mother’s daughter, with that gift of making me want to love Jesus better than I do.
Melissa,
That one penetrated…something deep.
I really, really appreciate your authenticity…this is the best light I’ve seen you in. And, I didn’t think anything could top the wedding photo.
Holding you up in prayer.
No more games,
Susan
Melissa
Each post gets harder to digest … I can only imagine how you and the team feel … perhaps like a sponge that is being squeezed for every last drop? So, I pray that the refreshment of the Lord will fall on all of you anew, and like a sponge, you can soak it up, and when you are squeezed again, His love and compassion will come forth.
You wrote:
“we headed to the program site where several hundred bright-eyed children greeted us, fifty of whom do not have sponsors yet. Almost all of the children at this site are from the slums.”
I would like to sponsor one of the fifty who have no one. How can I get connected to one of these children? Thanks.
Denise/Monroe, GA
Jesus is so amazing. I’m humbled by your post.
Fantastic post, Melissa.
I need this tattooed on the inside of my eyelids…
“The Scriptures are too profound just to read in isolation of the real world. They must be read and lived. To be interpreted correctly, they must be performed. The gospel of Jesus Christ is too big, too cataclysmic, to be left on the page. They should burst forth from our reality.”
Oh Melissa, this is exactly what I needed to hear today. I am humbled and ashamed of my selfish desires. I too have thought about not wanting to invite people over because my home wasn’t “good enough.” My mind keeps going back to the 2 kids we sponsor- and I am urged to do more. I can’t wait to speak to my husband about doing more. I have been so blessed by your posts. Thank you for being so transparent.
Melissa,
Thank you so much for your daily posts. They have me crying everyday. The word Compassion International has come up in my life several times over the past year, and now with your posts, I know that it was God speaking to my heart about sponsoring a child. My 5 year old daughter and I chose a child to sponsor yesterday. Please don’t think this as insensitive, but I kept choosing what I thought as the “cutest” little 5 year old girls that my daughter would also choose, but she went back to the same one everytime. I believe something about this little girl spoke to my little girl’s heart. She is now referring to her as “my sister in India”. Melissa, you and your family are such a blessing to us…this blog is life changing…thank you for allowing us to live vicariously through you this week.
Much love,
Tisha
Melissa: Reading these posts from you is so bittersweet… My emotions are so raw and I go from being ashamed for having so much, to being thankful for God’s grace and blessings.
Thank you for being our eyes and ears and hands and sharing this journey with all of us so masterfully that we can experience it too.
I am so moved just by READING your blog and looking at the pictures, I can’t even imagine how you are feeling there with the actual sounds, the heat, the smells, the sleep deprivation – all of everything.
Thank you Melissa – thank you for your transparent and precious heart. You have been so dear to me through all of this – so tender. The picture of you about to “lose it” says it all –
Much love to you girl,
Mrs. Jan
Your picture says it all. My heart is heavy.
Praying,
Jennifer
The pride that was there in my heart is being melted away. Thank you. I understand what you said about not wanting to have people over for this or that reason, etc. I am there and have been for 1 1/2 yrs since we moved. Thank you for this light to shine so brightly that even it reaches the dark places. I have a huge heart for orphans, God has made it so. We are in the process of adopting from Korea. Someone has left behind this treasure and it will soon be ours. The gift she has already brought us she will never know, I only pray that we will be a treasure to her, as well.
Melissa, you have highlighted this in one of these posts already….I am in awe by the beauty of these precious ones. We work so hard to fix our makeup, hair, clothes, nails, etc. …..these precious ones just sparkle with beauty and it appears to be totally natural! It is so obvious and yet so startling as well as striking.
I am ALWAYS impressed by others in other cultures…thanks for sharing!
I don’t know how you do it but you just took my heart and put it into words.
I’m officially done trying to write about this trip! 🙂
Loved the N.T. Wright quote.
I know your mama is in a puddle on the floor after reading this post. I have no words. God is doing a work in my heart and He is using your post and the others to do it. God Bless you Melissa
Still praying God’s protection and care over you – Be Blessed
Praying for you and your friends. I don’t even know what to say. I have been reading your posts and it never fails, I always cry. I heard on the radio today that someone said how awful we would be to know the saving power of our great God and not share it with others. I can surely tell you are sharing it with others and God bless you for that.
Well, I am the new proud sponsor of the sweetest little 9 year old boy and I am HONORED to do this. I just submitted my info. I pray that my little monthly contribution will help him and his family. Melissa, you are a BEAUTIFUL woman (even in the heat and humidity of India!) with a heart the size of Texas. What an unexplainable experience you must be having. Thank you for sharing your insights with all of us. Many of your comments remind me of a mission trip I chaperoned for high schoolers as a college student and how I was humbled by the poverty yet sheer joy these people had. It was hard to come back to the states and go back to my summer job as a salesgirl for Nordstrom and witness the materialism our society clung to in the “me” decade of the 80’s. Not much has really changed. I am certain you will come back and see your apartment as a near mansion! Thank you for telling me about Compassion International. I had never heard of it before and now I am the sponsor of a sweet little boy who shares my son’s birthday.
Praying for you as your trip winds down. Safe travels!
P.S. I had the priviledge of attending the LPL event in Portland a couple of weeks ago…I am still buzzing about it! What a difference from the 2003 event here…the numbers were astounding this time! It blessed me tremendously to witness that.
A wise pastor once told me, “The more your eyes leak, the less swollen your head gets.” My head is severely de-swelling at this moment. My shameful complaining is put aside. Thanks Melissa. God bless the journey.