This morning I woke up thrilled to have gotten a solid four hours of sleep but completely unaware that the day before me would prove to be one of the most momentous days of my life. Today we visited the slums that have arguably made Calcutta so famous. Just when I thought I had seen poverty in its purest form, we took a giant leap into a whole different echelon. I should warn you in advance that I am a sloppy mess today. My hard heart finally broke today and it spilled itself all over the streets of Calcutta.
First, we headed to the program site where several hundred bright-eyed children greeted us, fifty of whom do not have sponsors yet. Almost all of the children at this site are from the slums. This group of children brought me unspeakable joy. My heart hurt when we had to leave them. Check some of them out.
After playing with the kids, our team then set out for our home-visits in the slums. During the home-visits we go along with several of the Compassion children and we survey their living conditions and listen to their stories. Most of all, we get to inquire to our heart’s content about how Compassion’s child sponsorship program has changed their lives. So, we parked our van and huddled around Spence, as he warned us with unusual sobriety that we needed to be extremely careful taking pictures in the slums. We were informed that had the Compassion India field staff not accompanied us, we could have been in danger walking in the slums. So, with this slightly unsettling piece of information, we made our way through and we saw unimaginable things right before our eyes.
People half naked bathing with filthy water on the uneven and trash-infested streets. Pre-teen prostitutes with painted faces hanging out of a door in the red-light district just to make as little as 50 cents per “job”. A six-month old infant lying alone on a bed in a shack without any supervision *for the entire day* since both his parents are out working daily labor jobs and living desperately from hand to mouth. These are the kinds of things people try to keep themselves from admitting actually exist. But they do.
Seven out of ten of us climbed and packed ourselves into the home of Kiran Mallik, a precious twelve-year old girl who melted all our hearts like butter. The other three couldn’t fit. It was the tiniest little shack I have ever seen, if you could even call it a shack. It was considerably smaller than a twin bed. A family of five lives in it. Here is
Pete bending over to look inside:
One more time in case you’re skimming this post, a family of five lives in this shack. It certainly isn’t the filthiest of the shacks we saw in the slums but we were hard-pressed to understand how five people could even fit it in at one time since we were all kneeled down very uncomfortably. And then we found out that some of the family actually sleeps on the streets at night because there simply is not enough room. Here is a picture of Kiran standing outside her house. Look at her smile. Talking about stealing the heart of you.
We kneeled around and listened to Kiran tell her story through a translator. Her beaming smile and joyous spirit were enough to distract from the oppressive heat. She told us about how she loves to study, how much she loves Jesus, and how she wants to be a teacher someday.
And then she asked us, her guests, with a genuine smile on her face as though she was taking us on a tour of her mansion:
“How do you like my house?”
Can you remember what it felt like to break up with your first love? Okay, now multiply that by about a million. It was like a dagger in my heart. I didn’t just want to cry. I wanted to completely lose it. But I joined in with the rest of the team, who were likely feeling the same way, and we all said, “We love it. It is beautiful.”
And I thought of the times that I’ve told my husband I don’t want to have a certain couple over to our apartment because our dining room table isn’t big enough. I thought of the times that I’ve been “ashamed” to invite friends into our home because it isn’t fancy enough or we don’t have enough chairs or our sofa isn’t comfortable enough. The countless times I’ve complained about the paint color on the walls.
There I was. A Compassion sponsor. Being mentored by a Compassion child on what is really important in life. I realized that we often assume people are completely hopeless just because they don’t have the material wealth that we deem necessary for a quality life. But sometimes those who are in the most difficult circumstances know best of all where to find hope. Kiran sure did. She had hope because through God’s grace via Compassion International she has a safe place to learn, to get a hot meal, and to hear more about Jesus.
Two seconds away from completely losing it:
I’ve often wondered how an average middle class American becomes a social activist. I think I’m beginning to understand. I’m not saying that I am one. I’ve already admitted, I’m just not that brave. What I am saying is something similar to what N.T. Wright said in Simply Christian, “The world in its present state is out of tune with God’s ultimate intention.” Today as I walked through the slums in Calcutta something rose up with protest in my soul with a resounding “NO!” This is not the way it is supposed to be.
“The cry for justice in the world, then, must be taken up and amplified by the Christian church, as the proper response to the voice of the living God. The gospel of Jesus Christ and the power of the Spirit indicate that there are ways forward…Christians should be energetic in advocating and pursuing that justice for which all human beings long and which burst upon the world, in a fresh and unexpected way, through Jesus.” (N.T. Wright, Simply Christian, 228)
When I was asked to go along on this trip to Calcutta, the honest truth is that I wasn’t jumping out of my skin with excitement. I really was too busy at work to be taking a week and a half off and I knew it would put more stress on me when I got back. But here was the rub: I was studying James 1:27 at the time. You know that really inconvenient verse that defines true religion before God our Father as looking after orphans and widows in their distress. The way I would apply this verse is that we are to look and care for the most vulnerable people groups in our local communities and of our world at large. There was no denying that the children in the slums of Calcutta qualified as some of the most oppressed and vulnerable people in our world. I’ve learned a whole lot about James 1:27 from reading commentaries, periodicals, and whathaveyou; but I will tell you that I have learned just as much if not more about the scope of the verse from actually entering into conversation with the real flesh and blood reality of poverty and social oppression. From actually touching the children from the slums and being touched by them.
Today one of the children grabbed my hand and when she let go, I didn’t want her to. In that moment I felt I needed her as much as she needed me. The Scriptures are too profound just to read in isolation of the real world. They must be read and lived. To be interpreted correctly, they must be performed. The gospel of Jesus Christ is too big, too cataclysmic, to be left on the page. They should burst forth from our reality.
Tomorrow is the big day when we get to meet our sponsor children! Please do check out the posts from my fellow bloggers. Actually, they are no longer just my fellow bloggers, they’re my friends. A special bond has been forged. They are people who have dared a selfish coward to stare into the face of poverty. People who are willing to face the reality of a broken world, to have their hearts torn apart, and then to use whatever is left of it to usher in the kingdom of God here on this earth.
With Love,
Melissa
I am losing it with you. Some things you just have to experience to be able to understand with your heart as well as your head. Praying for you often.
Much love!
Oh…… my goodness !
Melissa,
I’m simply at a loss for words.
Love,
Yolanda
Melissa – I am two people! We have a couch with holes in it and I hate it! And – we pass beggars on the street most Sundays on the way to church and I cry most every time I see them! Which is it? Who am I? I long to help others – but I want an amazing home so that I can host an awesome “Organizational Meeting” to plan with the “In Crowd” of our city – complete with flavored iced tea and fun little sandwiches!
You reminded me again of how much God longs for me stop longing for stuff and long for Him! I am praying for you – thank you
sharing your experiences with us.
God’s Peace!
Mary Ann
Wichita Falls
Each day my heart is pulled more and more into a commitment to sponsor a child with Compassion.
My husband has already consented, as soon as we are back on our feet. We, with five children of our own, have just had to move in with my mother-in-law since my husband lost his job in January.
We are barely able to maintain, but have fully committed ourselves to becoming part of the solution in a world filled with excuses.
Thank you so much for your time in India, you are such an inspiration and the children are angels on earth.
Blessings and prayers,
Dannielle
I’m getting laid off in about a week and this just puts life into perspective. This blog makes me realize that doing with a little less money really is not suffering for us, we will be able to pay our bills. Instead we are suffering in our busy life with not enough time to put ourselves aside and help other people. We are suffering with way too much indulgence. I feel like there’s hope as I am looking forward to simplfying my life. I pray we are a better community of Christians because of the hardships (doesn’t seem fair to call it that) that are coming upon us.
Thank-you, I will carry this blog with me and rejoice in Him when the cable gets shut off. By the way I am already sponsoring a child and I am committed to her through the hard times.
Love all of you at Living Proof!
Beautifully put, Melissa.
My prayers are with you.
New sponsor…done. I am now the sponsor of a precious little girl, my packet is on the way. Thank you for opening my eyes to such a desperate need.
Hang in there – it’s wonderful for you to give your heart and eyes to be our connection to such an area of the world. You are a gift to us, you are your mother’s child. We are blessed. Nuf said! Thanks.
Made the mistake of reading this during a work break.
Tears are streaming down my face.
There are no words.
Except, thank you so much for sharing your heart, your pictures and bringing me closer to the heart of our loving Father.
My 5 year old is asking me why I am crying. Kiran is beautiful. Thank you for the precious post and for being real and sharing with us your experiences.
I have been reading your blog along with Angie’s and all I can say is that through your words, my heart is breaking and my eyes are being opened to such bigger things… things of eternal importance.
Thank you for your obedience, for all the love you are sharing, the words of hope and encouragement you are giving, and for being the hands and feet of Christ.
Thank you too for allowing us to journey with you.
Melissa- You have touched and broken my heart with this post. I am going to talk to my husband tonight about becoming a Compassion Sponsor.
I followed the Uganda bloggers, and the Columbia bloggers, and now I’m following the India bloggers…….and can I just say melissa, that you are knocking it out of the park. What I’m reading each day is a total grand slam for the kingdom!!
We sponsored a child in Uganda as a result of the Uganda trip….I hope there are tons and tons of sponsors for the India trips.
Shana
Alright, that one made me sob.
Praying for you and the amazing people whose lives you are touching in ways so deep, that perhaps only they themselves and God Alone know about!!
PRAISE GOD for godly people!! God is SO VERY GOOD AND SO VERY FAITHFULL! AND PRAISE HIM THAT HE HAS NEVER AND WILL NEVER CHANGE!!
Thanks for sharing your heart. I left mine in the dumps of Honduras.
Melissa, you’ll never be the same after this trip, will you? May God continue to bless you all…
Oh, Melissa! I know what I’m feeling is just a thimble-full of what you’re going through, and I’m practically breathless – pained from the effort of holding back tears. My question for you is – now what? When you come back to our materialistic, self-centered daily life, what do you do? How do you live?
There are close to 1500 children available for sponsorships…how on earth does one choose?
The only thing I can think to do is to ask the Lord to choose one for me as I go through the pictures. 😀
I don’t have any words right now.
Melissa – thanks for your blogging. It has really opened my eyes have a “first hand” account.
I am sick over you telling of the 6month old laying in a shack all day along while parents live hand to mouth. My baby boy is safe and in the arms of caring people all day. It is truely heart wrenching.
again, thanks for opening my eyes. Slumdog millionaire is nothing compared to your blog entries.
Thank you for sharing this journey with us. There are no words that can describe my thoughts and emotions. Please know that you and your team are in my prayers. May God bless you and the team.
Melissa, thank you for honestly sharing your heart and experience. Jumbled thoughts and jumbled emotions are what I’m experiencing now. I pray the Lord continues to show you Himself through this journey and that He continues to tenderize all of our hearts in the U.S. towards Him and His people worldwide. All of our callings are different in life, but we can certainly all do something to spread the Gospel in other nations (i.e. sponsoring a Compassion child, sponsoring a missionary, funding missions trips for others or volunteering in the missions ministry in our local church, donating items needed to carryout missions, and of course we all can pray).
Melissa, may God continue to use you and your Compassion friends mightily on this trip and my He minister to you throughout the journey.
Blessings to you,
Tina
At first I didn’t think I was at the right place…You’ve change some things since I was on last…
Sorry was is a daze from the shock to my system there…
I am lifting you up, Mellisa, my heart goes out to them of course, how could it not these are God’s precious creations suffering…but my heart morns for you and with you. I don’t think I could handle something like that in person.
Wow. That beautifully captured your thoughts at this point, and more importantly the people who you are ministering to.
God bless you all,
Aveline
Melissa,
Yesterday your words and the Spirit of God compelled me to adopt my own Compassion Child from India and I obeyed. A precious, bright-eyed, 4-year old little boy now has a blue-eyed, blonde-headed sponser half way around the world. I have been on Mission’s trips numerous times and have experienced the kind of poverty and breaking that you have experienced this week. It breaks my heart that it is so easy to come home and to so easily forget what you see. Sure, I remember the places that I visited, how poor the people were, how horrendous the living conditions, but time has a way of diminishing the harshness and realness of it all. Your posts have jolted me back into reality and convicted me to take action. Thank you.
In the Lamb’s Love,
LeighAnne
No words other than Lord forgive me…
Thank you for taking us with you Melissa. This is your pilgrimage.
I look forward to reading your daily post….then I dread reading your daily post. Thank you for taking us along on this life altering experience.
Thank you, Melissa, for letting Jesus shine through you!
Thank you, God, for giving Melissa the gift of communication, and her ability to paint a picture out of words to help all of us to see Your heart!
Judith
And now you know one of the reasons why you are there. You are actually being ministered to as well. You go to another country wondering how you are going to help someone else, and you find out that they are helping you in some way.
Melissa, Just like you almost couldn’t bother to go on this trip to Calcutta, I hadn’t been “able” to read one of your blogs up to today. The whole situation just seemed too far away and irrelevant for me to spend time reading about. I’m a busy person, after all! (Not!) I’m ashamed to admit it, but I just really didn’t have room in my heart to bother with what you might uncover in India.
But today you grabbed me and I read every word. And I am overwhelmed with sorrow and shame and pity and, yes, compassion. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for bravely going, not so much to a faraway country or dangerous area, but to a place that took your heart to unexplored places. That requires a little bravery and no small amount of humility and obedience. Please love the children for us. We’re praying for you and them.
Kay
I have anxiously awaited your posts everyday. This one by far has touched me more than any of the others. I would loved to be there right now. You have been in my prayers all week.
I am setting in my office at work. Trying to hide the tears as they fill my eyes.
Thank you for being so real and honest.
Thank you. This is amazing.
Blessings,
Marita
I’m with some of the others: no words. I wish I could be profound now, but I can’t. God bless you, Melissa.
I was not all that familiar with Compassion prior to your trip, although between this blog & Angie's, I am learning so much. I have always loved the Indian people, I just never knew what the Lord would do with that. I felt like this would be a great outlet, to sponsor a child. So I sat my 4 year old down and we began to look through the kids…her request in finding a child was "one with no family." Bless her little 4 year old heart…we were not able to find an orphan there so she choose another sweet girl, close to her age. Thank you for documenting this trip….it's almost as if we are there too…well, not quite …
I can’t do anything but just bawl.
Love,
Kristen
Speechless and ashamed. We are truly rich, spoiled Americans.
Leah
Melissa, you are definatly BRAVE ENOUGH!! Your journey has brought me to my knees daily! Kiran stole my heart as well, so stunning! I just now, this minute, sponsored a sweet little girl names Amisha, from India. I CANNOT wait to get my packet! If I am this excited for my packet, I can’t imagine how you feel to get to hug your sponsored child tomorrow! Many prayers!!
Oh Melissa, I don’t think words can convey my response to your post adequately, but I want to try.
I am incredibly thrilled that your head and your heart are connecting!
I can relate only too well concerning how great the distance between those two things can be; but I also have experienced moments of connection-and those moments are mind-blowing and life-changing.
I just want to encourage you to continue opening your heart; continue to FEEL. God has set you on an amazing journey. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.
Praying for you, Melissa … cuz I know you have to come home. And that will be a different kind of hardship. What is the proper response to what you are experiencing? Do you come home and sell all your possessions? Do you simply endure the discrepancy between life there and life here until enough time passes to ease the ache and make us complacent again?
Can you tell I’ve experienced all these feelings before? My heart is broken anew this week along with yours. How does God want us to change the way we live and think?
Praying with you,
Barbra
Without sounding just crazy Melissa…I don’t know how much more my heart can take. And, I’m sitting in my lovely den watching my flatscreen tv. I feel just sick.
I CANNOT imagine how y’all are feeling as you walk it, see it, live it, breathe it.
I’m praying for the kids that don’t have sponosors yet. Begging for hearts to open up and take that child.
Love you so.
Fran
TN
I’m blown away, speechless, numb and tears streaming…thank you for sharing, Melissa. Thank you for being willing to go and live out James 1:27. Know that I’ve been challenged by your posts and the beautiful children you’ve met. They are PRECIOUS! I love you sister!
Blessings,
jenn
Melissa, a humble thank you. Through your brilliant writing, you have focused my heart on this. I have nothing more to say….speechless…
Oh how I loved this post. I copied the line about the kitchen table not being big enough, pasted it in word, printed it and have it at my desk.
Love it x 12.
And how exciting is it that you get to meet your sponsored child tomorrow!! I’d be on pins and needles!
Dearest Melissa,
My words fail me, they really do, because I sit here with tears rolling down my cheeks hitting my arms as I type and running to my elbows…some times there just aren’t enough words huh?!
I am living right now in Honduras, praying to learn to be a more obedient follower, and witnessing so much of what you’ve described in your words. To follow another’s journey to reach places you so often have felt within your own soul hit places deeply.
In the most uncondescending way possible to say this, I am so proud of you for choosing to give up what was easy and go to places that would change pieces of your heart and soul forever.
The truth is this and I believe it with all of my heart, the kingdom of God will look and feel different to you than it ever did before for the rest of your life.
Thank you for taking us on your journey. You have broken this heart once again in places that needed to be raw again.
May you touch with His hands, speak with His words, and feel with His heart (most difficult for sure.)
Think that your heart is right where it’s supposed to be. If it breaks God’s heart it ought to break ours too.
Blessings, prayers, and much love.
Melissa:
Thank you for sharing your journey… no words are big enough for the emotion that is in my heart. I am praying for the children and praying for you and your team.
You did remind me to be thankful for what I have, because like you I have been embarassed to have people to my home becuase I thought it is meager and small and I didn’t have the best stuff. It is a great reminder to be thankful for what we have becuase in a heart beat it could be all gone.
Blessings and tender mercy on you..
Lichelle
Your way of writing and expressing yourself is so touching. Your words lept right off the page and straight to my heart. What a line? Do you like my house?? What a major lesson for me. In my world of convenience and privelege to hear that, was so overwelming and wonderful at the same time. I so wish I could sit down with you and hear all about the trip.
Much love and peace to you.
Tammy
Cincinnati
I’m speechless. Your words are amazing!
Melissa, as I have been reading and contemplating your posts my mind is whirling and I really don’t know how to put my thoughts into words.
Lynn in Red Deer, AB
That last picture of you loving on the beautiful lady brought tears to my eyes. I could almost “feel” your emotions.
Dearest Melissa,
I know that I say this every day, but thank you so much for sharing your trip, yourself with us. What a life changing experience… I believe for all of us who have shared this experience with you.
Much love and prayers,
Sharon, NC