Ten years ago, before transferring to Moody and moving to Chicago ever even entered my mind, I was a little sophomore at Baylor University. One fine central Texas day I went down with a friend to a place cleverly called Waco Hall to listen to an increasingly well-known “upcoming” musician. All I knew about the musician I had gleaned from the signs scattered on walls around campus: he had really good hair.
The musician was Shaun Groves. And if I remember correctly, he had just released his first big record Invitation to Eavesdrop. I knew, even then, after just a few minutes listening to Shaun sing, that he had a special voice. Something about him was unique. I sensed that he was a person who both thought and felt deeply about faith and the world. What I most certainly did not sense is that in less than a decade I would be bouncing around East India with a tiny group he was leading.
But in the third world together we were destined to be.
April 2009 to be exact.
On one of those blistering 125-degree days in Kolkata, Shaun and I got to talking. We were on the bus doing what theology nerds do best . . . taking ourselves far too seriously and talking about some Bible verses. We were throwing around phrases like “the new perspective on Paul” “the kingdom” “inaugurated eschatology” and whatnot. We discussed how necessary it is for us to have a holistic understanding of Scripture’s voice about wealth and poverty. We were ranting and complaining how it simply won’t do to quote one or two verses from the gospels; we need to understand everything we can about poverty and wealth in the entire canon. Only then could we really understand the Church’s mission concerning wealth and poverty. But then we got to talking about a couple of verses in the book of Proverbs. Specifically these:
Proverbs 30.7-9
Two things I ask of you;
deny them not to me before I die:
Remove far from me falsehood and lying;
give me neither poverty nor riches;
feed me with the food that is needful for me,
lest I be full and deny you
and say, “Who is the LORD?”
or lest I be poor and steal
and profane the name of my God.
Interesting verses, right? We both suspected that these verses are crucial to the Church’s conversation concerning wealth and poverty. Shaun swears that, among other things, our conversation about these verses has something to do with the song “Enough” on his new record Third World Symphony. I imagine he is grossly exaggerating but I really don’t care since it happens to be my favorite song on the album.
These were fun times, good conversations.
But nothing could have prepared me for the moment, just a few hours later, when the ideas in this conversation would become a human being. Kiran is the real reason Shaun wrote “Enough.”
Nothing could have prepared me for Kiran, a Compassion student who lives in one of the slums of Kolkata.
On April 30, 2009 seven members of our team crammed tightly into the home of twelve year old Kiran Mallik. The home she shares with her four other family members. Three of our team members simply couldn’t fit inside. The tiny little shack was about the size of a twin bed, approximately the size of my spare powder bath.
Here is a picture of Kiran standing outside her house.
We couldn’t stand up inside the little house so with knees and thighs touching, we kneeled around on the floor. We sat captivated by Kiran as she revealed to us who she was through a translator. She told us how much she loves Jesus, how she loves to study and hopes to become a teacher someday.
And then she paused.
And she asked us, with a soft and sincere smile on her face:
“How do you like my house?”
Looking helplessly at one another, we collectively cheered:
“It’s beautiful!”
“Yes, it’s beautiful!”
She beamed in agreement and with satisfaction.
But the thing is, I really couldn’t see beauty.
What I saw on that hot April day was a flimsy little box of a house roofed with plastic paper, rocks, and sticks.
Later as we walked around the slum, Kiran would start to cry.
Tears of joy, she said. Tears because she was just so happy she had God.
Then she would literally burst forth into songs of praise. This is the stuff of the Psalms or maybe even the book of Acts. I saw these things in an Indian slum.
And all I could think about was stuff Kiran didn’t possess.
The dark, scary place we were walking around.
All Kiran could think about was that God was with her.
Where I saw tremendous lack, Kiran saw an extravagance worth displaying.
The radiant joy Kiran effused challenged the “lack” I saw.
Her intoxicating presence told me she lacked no good thing.
This was one of those remarkable moments when fixed values start to move. A paradigm shift, if you will. I had to start deconstructing and reconstructing meaning; I had to start trying to make sense of things again. Clearly I had been missing something major about basic life questions. I started posing new questions: What does it really mean to be blessed? What does it mean to have enough? Can I really trust myself to answer this former question?
Being in Kiran’s presence was something of a dream. Surreal. I felt like I was bound in chains in a dark room gazing out a window at a little girl skipping in a field of sunflowers at the brightest point of the day.
It wasn’t that Kiran was proud of what little she had. That would have been admirable, indeed. But that wasn’t it. It was the very idea that Kiran had absolutely no idea she had little. No one could have convinced Kiran she was “suffering,” not without performing some kind of lobotomy anyway. She was rich and full, living off of a couple of Compassion meals. She knocked me off my white horse. I wasn’t the one doing the liberating anymore. I never was. Maybe I had been bound all along.
The remarkable thing about the Proverbs text I mentioned before (30.7-9) is not that it mentions living in the middle of two extremes: poverty and wealth. The astonishing thing is that it links spiritual infidelity to these two extremes. In other words, living off of just enough, that which is necessary, is spiritually advantageous. At least according to the wisdom writer.
Kiran’s effortless joy, her tremendous wealth in living off the Lord alone, not only reverberates the sounds of the ancient sage; it takes the shape of a cross. Her abundant life is nothing short of cruciform. Undeniable power in perceived human weakness. And not even the thickest darkness can obstruct this kind of light. It is the overwhelming penetrating light of the cross. I was blinded by it because I couldn’t stop staring at Kiran.
My vision will never be the same.
If I close my eyes and focus long enough, I can still hear the sound of Kiran’s voice. She is singing, “Lord, I lift Your Name on High. Lord, I love to sing Your Praises.” The cadences of her voice are still in my heart.
This post brought me back to our family’s experience this Summer of being in a home so small that you couldn’t stand up in it… home of an unsponsored Compassion LDP student we visited in the Philippines. We visited as Advocates, hoping to find a sponsor for her when we got back home… we ended up sponsoring her ourselves… such a blessing for us!
Here’s the story of our visit to Rochelle’s home:
http://mamaof2greatkids.blogspot.com/2011/08/how-to-make-sense-of-this.html
Wow, now there’s some perspective for you. I certainly need this kind of reminder every now and then.
Melissa, your mention of extremes reminded me of Ecclesiastes 7:18b – “The man who fears God will avoid all extremes.” A lot of widom in that…
Oops — wisdom not widom 🙂
Reminds me of John Piper’s The Dangerous Duty of Delight…this sweet young lady sounds like she understands what has taken me a long time to begin to “get.”
My heart is so stirred with the wonder of what life will be like to naturally exude joy because HE has so transformed me and renewed my mind…this post is really resonating with me as to the “lack of no good thing” that she knew of and how my heart longs for the same because HE will meet me in every way.
Oh that we would all have the contentment of this young lady. Thank you for introducing us all to her. And to her joy in Christ.
Thank you so much for sharing the story of Kiran!!! That is the second time this morning God has directed me to a message I needed to read!!
Do I have tears of joy because I have God?
I love this, Melissa. 🙂 Thanks for sharing what’s on your heart!!
Truth. Beauty. What an amazing post.
I feel such a hunger in my own heart to enter missions. What a MIGHTY Lord we serve, what a blessing to share His story with them. I also, perhaps selfishly, long to learn from those same children. It fills my soul when I hear people returning from mission journeys and are just so overwhelmed at what immense blessings they too recieved. Oh, to be humbled before the Lord…FOR the Lord and His kingdom. I can almost imagine our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, beaming and smiling when he sees the two-fold blessings of sharing His love with one another.
Thank you for sharing, Melissa. Your story has succeeded in further fueling my desire to serve. Blessings, Siesta!
WOW!
thanks for sharing that….Im gonna have to think on it
Thank you Melissa for introducing us to Kiran and her beautiful face and story. Such an amazing lesson.
My daughter got to meet unexpectedly, by God’s gracious divine will, our Compassion daughter while on a church planting mission in Rwanda. It was a life changing meeting for all of us. Farida was living in the poorest condition that my dd had seen & yet their family so grateful. My dd was able to hug her & hold her tight for us and best of all – lead her & her family (& many her had followed them from the village) to the Lord. I am praying she is walking now in the joy of the Lord that I see in Kiran.
It changed my dd whole approach to medical missions and reinforced to us that Jesus is what we need most.
Thanks Melissa for sharing.
Melissa…things like this is what makes me BEG for a mission trip but also scare me to death. I know I would be seriously wrecked. I can be the most selfish greedy girl who just wants wants wants. The “things” that I want have nothing to do with Jesus so much of the time. I catch myself saying “Fran..get over yourself and make it all about Jesus like you say.” Mercy.
This is good stuff. This is hard stuff. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.
Love and respect you so!
Fran
Fran,
Don’t be scared. Do yourself a favor and GO on the mission trip. Life changing, in a wonderful way. Yes, you will cry every day but blessings abound and you will never forget it. Pray you live differently afterwards in the wasteland known as America, the land of plenty. You will find we are the ones who are bankrupt.
Loved this, Melissa. Sometimes I think I (and we as a nation) are so bloviatingly full of STUFF – that we miss the simple joy of Jesus. I had a similar experience one day while with my husband in the middle of a safari in northern Zimbabwe. We came across the tiniest of huts. A young, smiling mother sat outside around her fire with exactly two pots and her two playful children. Upon speaking with them (the 11 year old daughter spoke perfect Queen’s English), we learned they were believers. So full of joy and light and love and Jesus sitting by a little fire with the two objects they owned (pots) besides some clothing.
It jarred me. And the verses I know so well came back, hauntingly: the Kingdom is in you, the Kingdom is near, the Kingdom is here, do you not perceive it? The Kingdom is not of this world, the Kingdom is one of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
Would that I perceive it. Would that those of us in the West not miss the beautiful Kingdom because we’re so occupied with lesser things.
(Thanks, Melissa! I’ve missed Canon Girl — it’s my new name for you, and a right rather high honor, if I do say so. Have a happy Houston day ~)
Beautiful. Humbling. Challenging. Thought-provoking and life changing.
Am I living in the joy of the Lord? Do I even understand what it means to truly look to Him for all things?
When I read this I wonder.
I’ve spent the last 48 hrs whining over some petty relationship issue that is truly a non-issue. Oh to have TRUE Joy in the Lord.
Thanks Melissa — this post will long resonate with my spirit. As will Third World Symphony.
Melissa,
My heart was being squeezed with emotion as I read this post on Kiran. What a sweet girl full of contentment and love for The Lord. Thank you for sharing her story. In my own life, I want that unobstructable light that darkness cannot penetrate.
Thank you for sharing,
Stacie
Melissa,
This post was so beautiful! It really spoke to my heart today and puts many things in perspective for me. It is an amazing contrast of worlds we live in and take for granted and speaks so much to the discontent and lack of joy those of us on this blessed side of the world we live in versus the pure joy and radiantly displayed love of our Lord so many seem to have naturally on the other more baron side of the world. Thanks for waking me up today to whats important to have in our lives which is not things but the joy only found in loving and completely trusting God.
Beautiful Heart,
I love you! You have brought this part of the world to me and to the Siesta’s that wouldn’t otherwise have known or seen! I am grateful! A friends daughter is going to India for a year and she will work in an orphanage and teach english…we made her “board” recently, the one that she will display as she raises her support to go, and I had the unique privilage of caring for the faces and lives in her photos and the sweet lives that will be saved as a result of her “mission” I love this post came soon after and I am reminded and challenged all over again…Come Lord Jesus!!
Love you Melissa!
Thank you Melissa. This was so moving. Truly Kiran is the embodiment of Romans 10:15 Beautiful Are the Feet of Those Who Bring Good News Romans
Thank you Melissa. This was so moving. Truly Kiran is the embodiment of Romans 10:15 Beautiful Are the Feet of Those Who Bring Good News.
Melissa, I so appreciate your article. Newly introduced to Beth’s blog page just recently, I am so pleased to see a young person such as yourself, being a part of all that’s being accomplished and pursued in this ministry. Very interesting, you Kiran, as I just met a wonderful teacher/leader/pastor on-line, named Kiran. Where is your Kiran now? Or do you know? Blessings to you and I can see that your part will be fruitful in Beth’s ministry.
“inaugurated eschatology”- I had to google that, and reading Wikipedia and some other sites, I am still confused and scratching my head.
BUT
I sure did get the message about humility. Sometimes I think the early Christians would be mad at us for being so spoiled. I was reading Thessalonians last night and was struck by Paul reminding them to expect hard times.
Thank you for sharing Melissa! And thank you for introducing us to Kiran. She is indeed beautiful….inside and outside! If you have ever gotten to go on a missions trip to a third world country…you will NEVER be the same when you return back to the states. We are BEYOND blessed! But the thing that still lingers in my heart from being in Uganda…are their smiles…even among so little.
BTW…..liked Shaun’s song…thanks for including it! 🙂
OOOOH What a Stunningly Beautiful Woman!
Jesus is all over her smile!!!
Thanks Melissa for sharing her story and yours.
She is such a treasure 🙂
We recently adopted our first child through Compassion and received our first letter from him just a few days ago. He drew the most lovely lesson from school on the back of his letter…it’s hanging on my fridge as I type. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve walked past that letter and laid my hand on it and prayed for him. And trying to convey the humbling in my heart from that sweet, sincere letter would be impossible. (I almost came unglued when he greeted us with, “My loving parents…”) We are currently praying about visiting Rwanda to see Isac…and this post is almost surreal for me. My husband and I JUST talked about this again and there’s something in me that so desperately wants to put my hands on Isac’s face and tell him how grateful we are to serve him and know him. Can I just admit I’m afraid somewhere in here, too? And yes, we’ve also had a real burden on our hearts for just how much we “need” since reading “Radical”. Need has almost become an obscene word in our particular culture.
God is doing something in my family’s life and I’m tickled pink to see what he’s doing in yours, as well, Melissa. May those cadences ring in your ears, and heart, as long as your feet touch this planet…
Kristi,
I can’t recommend a Compassion sponsor trip highly enough. If you have the opportunity – seize it. Nothing prepares you for the experience of seeing your sponsored child face to face. 🙂 Truly wonderful.
Melissa –
That passage in Proverbs was dropped in my lap on Tuesday for consideration and I’ve been thinking about it as I try to teach my kids (ahem, and me) ‘contentment.’ What a blessing to have your honest post and Kiran’s radiant smile to put flesh on this. Thanks for sharing. For real.
Thank you for this post today – God has used those words to really speak to my heart. He is so faithful and loving!!
Thank you Melissa for the reminder. I spent one month in a small jungle town in South America. My heart yearns to go back, but my calling is “here”. (For now?)The amount of faith and gratitude I saw daily expressed in my brothers and sisters there who had so “little” spoke volumes to me. God’s love, His provision, the unity among believers, the hand of fellowship offered at every turn resonates within my spirit. It calls to me, beckons for me to remember… At every turn, in the sweetest and most unexpected ways: God sooo showed up!
Hmm, it is the life we each were gifted to live; yet here in the states all is clouded with misguided perspectives. My husband and I have been back for 6 months now and I am saddened how quickly agendas and demands are allowed to overshadow what is so special and of infinite worth. It was there when I was stripped of everything, wholly surrendered that I saw our Lord most beautifully. Does it mean lose everything here to have that? I would in a heartbeat. No rather, it’s losing my “self”, my control and expectation and trading my priorities for His. Grant me O Lord, eyes to see Your heart and a mind set on Your Will. Covet your prayers… Thank you again for sharing
Man. Here I sit in Suburbia, USA — envious of a poverty-stricken little girl in 3rd World, India, for not being SO insulated from our Savior because of the JUNK in her life. The Pinterest, the Facebook, the Big Screen TV, the neighbors’ STUFF. What a beautiful girl Kiran is with a beautiful outlook on life. Thank you so much for sharing Kiran with us.
“Heal my heart and make it clean,
Open up my eyes to things unseen,
Show me how to love like you have loved me.
Break my heart for what breaks yours,
Everything I am for your kingdom’s cause,
As I go from here into eternity.”
Thank-you for sharing, Melissa.
Melana
melana, really liked the poem you shared!
Joyce,
It’s from the song “Hosanna” by Hillsong United.
Melissa,
I think I remember reading about your time with Kiran when you were in India, and your description of that joy really stayed with me. Thanks so much for sharing it once again!
Melissa, I love you, friend. Your way with words, your transparency, your compassionate heart…your brain! Thanks for telling your story. Well, OUR story ; )
Most definitely “our” story, friend! I loved re-experiencing its power all over again. Things seem clearer and brighter. Thank you for the music of your life & for showing us all the kingdom. And I LOVE the new album!
Thank you for sharing this story Melissa.I had a similar experience on my first mission trip. We went to Lima, Peru. I met a wonderful lady who was teaching children that could not afford the bus trip to church in her own home. She was tracing one color sheet at a time with a pencil and carbon paper. She was so proud of her home and her community. She even gave us handmade gifts! I was in a place in my mind where all I could think of was what we lacked in our children’s ministry and there she was tracing one color sheet at a time by hand. Another girl invited us to see her home and she was so excited to have us visit her. The floor was dirt and there were no real walls, just tree branches holding up a tin roof. Animals were running around everywhere. Experiences like these will definitely change our perspectives!
I sat in chapel at Northwestern College this morning (or more correctly, just outside chapel, since I had my 2 little ones in tow) and heard Shaun recount this exact same story. I remember reading it when you first experienced it. But man. The story is just as powerful now as then. I found myself praying, earnestly, that Kiran is just as joyful today, just as blessed, just as happy with Jesus.
Lord, teach us what it means to have enough. Teach us to sow the rest.
And you didn’t come say hey?? It would have been GREAT to see you (and the kids) again, Kelly.
Thank you for sharing that sweet experience…. What a blessing it was to me today… God is the strength of my life and my portion forever… Let my focus be on Him today!
Thank you again!
Wow. I’ve been living in a small space and it’s been hard, but kind of nice. It is about the size of 10 twin beds! I am learning, I hope, to know God as my security but sometimes it’s hard. I am presently happy and thankful but I’m also praying for more of a home. Growing up in a real home, I’m sad to be in such a tiny apartment. I think, how can I entertain grandchildren when they come? I remember sitting by the fireplace on winter nights, eating vanilla ice cream at the kitchen counter, catching fireflies in the summer, swinging on the hammock…I could cry to think I don’t have that…but then sometimes I walk outside and think how beautiful the sky is and my breath is taken away with thanks and love. I want to ask God for “more” life, full life, home and family, but I REALLY want to be walking with Him every minute of the day. That’s the thing to always be looking at. To really change the viewpoint about having little is odd. The bible says your life is not your possessions, but when I’m so happy in the Lord, I feel safe, then something in my brain connects up with my idea of good and safe, and then I feel bad again! 🙂 Thank God for His goodness.
whew,melissa, so powerful! my hubby and i have been pondering on the “enough” thing for awhile now. your insight stopped me in my tracks! i must go to the LORD with this.
thanks so much!
Melissa,
You and Kiran are absolutely beautiful where it matters most, on the inside. This story makes me weep for what most of us usually don’t have, that being contentment. Sometimes, I wonder if all this “stuff” is the passive wrath of God. Or, are we allowing satan to keep us so busy with God stuff and good stuff that we completely miss experiencing God. I’ve been plagued for two weeks with this simple question, Am I living the life God has called me to live? This post is yet another reminder of that question. Thanks so much for sharing. I can see Gods finger prints all over your life. All glory to Him!
I find myself wondering what she would be doing with all that we have.
I’m in tears today. I have loved this song from the first moment I heard it – mostly because I adopted those verses as a theme for one of my blogs as I try to live more simply. But this story behind it has me in tears. That’s what I love about this album – they aren’t just lyrics – they are prompted by real stories from real people.
The more I listen to and sing this song, the more it scares me….scares me that God will strip me of my wealth leaving me way out of my comfort zone.
Crazy timing, but I just returned from a homeless ministry volunteer orientation, where I felt very overwhelmed by the need. Even the ministry’s facilities were extremely lacking. I felt out of place and powerless as to what I could do to help. The poverty made me sick to my stomach. I was ashamed of my North Face jacket and wished I had come without makeup so as to fit in better. I was beginning to think maybe I should just stick to serving the middle class -lead a Bible study or something.
I was too distracted to realize that what they really need is Jesus. What we all need is Jesus. I can’t buy them a new building, stock their empty toilet paper shelves, buy matresses so women don’t have to sleep on the floor, give the little girl I saw a brand new doll that isn’t covered with some dirty goop (without offending someone), or provide a warehouse full of clean clothing, but I can offer Jesus, in whom we all lack no good thing. He really is enough. Oh, to believe that with all my heart!
Thanks for the timely reminder!
Melissa, I think this is one of my favorite posts of your’s, ever.
You have so elloquently {because you are a Moore!} captured what I was just talking to my sister about. My heart desires deeply to be involved in missions…not just to get out of the country and see beautiful things, but to get my hands dirty, have my heart broken, and my life wrecked…I claim to be ready, but know in reality, I have no idea what I’m asking for.
Our pastor recently issued a 3 month prayer challenge for the rest of 2011; she preached on how, when we pray consistently and intentionally about something, big things happen. The top thing on my list is missions…for open doors, and guidance. I don’t have a specific place or mission in mind, but I know that as I pray, He’ll open doors. Thank you for confirming this, again. {and if you have a moment, sparing a prayer for me about it}.
Melissa – what beautiful, heartfelt and transparent writing. Thank you so much. I was sitting behind you and Colin at FBC Woodstock the first time I heard Shaun. He captivated my attention. Two Compassion children later, I’m forever grateful.
My first mission trip to South Africa two years ago was life-changing for me. I keep a picture nearby of four little boys I bonded with who lived in a shanty town in a corrugated metal hut. One of them had a plastic bag on his head to use as a hat in the cold wind. They were SO happy – they had just enough too. The mom cooking outside, trash heaps everywhere. I can still smell and feel it if I close my eyes. Here is a link to my journal for that day – the picture is about halfway down the blog post:
http://granjansjoy.blogspot.com/2009/09/south-africa-8-journal-day-3.html
I wonder if Kiran knows how beautiful she is? She radiates Jesus.
Love to you,
Mrs. Jan
Hi Melissa!! I remember this trip and LOVED watching ya’ll encounter Compassion. So much so that we sponsored 3 kids and still communicate regularly with them. Someday I want to visit!
Thank you for sharing again this special time with Kiran.
love,
rachel
p.s. what is the “new perspective on Paul?” been hearing that here and there…
Melissa,
Thank you so much for this story. It’s a topic that’s been on my mind a lot lately – this idea of “enough.” I have often wondered if we are truly as blessed as we think we are compared to those individuals like Kiran. I don’t have every gadget and new outfit I would like but I have way more than many people do, but what are possessions like iPads and smartphones and the newest fragrance of Yankee candle compared to her possession of pure joy and delight in Jesus?! I know that having material possessions is not wrong in and of itself but I, for one, need to keep them in perspective and moderation in my life. I really appreciate your image of being bound in chains in a dark room. I pray the Lord enlightens me to any unknown chains I’ve been bound with and helps me be free. I want to skip in the flowers in the bright day, too!
Melissa,
Sweetest! Just went up to tuck my little’s in for their nap and that very song was on. I absolutely loved this post! Love x 95869674635 which equals alot!
Melissa, Beautiful! Oh that we would rest in perfect peace content to depend on Him. Kiran is beautiful inside and out. Love her story!
I downloaded that song the other day… love it! Your post absolutely moved me. Thank you so much for sharing that with us all!
Many years ago, discontent with our tiny home, I prayed for God to show me how to be content. That week in the Sunday paper was an article about refugees trying to escape North Korea. They got stuck in some kind of camp waiting for paperwork. The place was overcrowded and the families would end up there for years. Each family was assigned a home the size of a bunk bed. I cut out that article and put it on my refrigerator. I never complained of my tiny house ever again.
I could listen to this story all day long. So much love to you … “you make me want to be brave!”
So So beautiful to read God’s voice speaking through your post…….thank you Heavenly Father that you let Melissa’s voice echo your words through this blog post.