Hey, Dear Ones! I’ve been meaning to hop on the blog all weekend long to say Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms but I’ve been so busy being one, I haven’t had a solitary second! Melissa flew in on Wednesday and worked at LPM the rest of the week so she could be here for Mom’s Day. She’d missed her coworkers so much and they’d missed her, too. She also needed to hang pictures in her office and put her own personal touches on it. She’s got taste none of us around there can really emulate. An interior design major turned Bible exegete creates a curious mix. Amanda worked in the office several days this week while Lis was here so it was a particularly wonderful atmosphere around the ministry for me. Colin flew in, then, late Thursday night and hadn’t been home since they’d moved to Atlanta. He is so darling. We all enjoyed having him like crazy.
Since Melissa and Colin had to leave pretty early today, we had our Mother’s Day celebration yesterday. Curtis graciously babysat our little guy while Amanda, Melissa and I did our Mother-Daughter thing at the greatest mall in Texas: The Houston Galleria. We were there when it opened. My idea of a good time is to give my girls a tad of shopping money and tell them they only have that one spree to spend it. The offer ends in four hours. With great glee, then, I watch them go into a frenzy to try to spend it. They balked at first because it was Mother’s Day but 1) they’d already spent plenty on me and 2) that’s what I wanted for my gift anyway. As young adult daughters often are, both of them are on a tighter budget than me so it’s such a blast to watch them get something they wouldn’t afford for themselves. We all three tried on one thing after another in three consecutive dressing rooms and sometimes Lis and I just shared one so we could see each other’s outfits. (Amanda’s more modest than we are but we always try to peek at her to make her mad.) We laughed like crazy and talked about everybody we had anything nice to say about and tried to bite our tongues over anyone we didn’t. Sometimes more successfully than others. JK. We behave pretty well. As long as nobody’s been ugly to one of my girls at which point I can seem suddenly overtaken by invisible powers and principalities.
We ate at Kona Grill there at the Galleria for lunch and it was really good. The hostess at the restaurant was a sister in Christ we’d never met and we really hugged. She was just adorable. Tiny little thing. Me and both girls all had on heels so we looked like the Jolly Green Giant’s twin sister and two daughters. We’d have loved for her to have sat down with us but I think she thought she might have needed a high chair. We piled our shopping bags in the booth, sat down with joyful sighs and ordered Sushi for appetizers. AJ’s liked it for a while but I’m just beginning to develop a taste for it. My buddy and one of my God-daughters, Amy Hodge, has been teaching me to eat it and even with chopsticks. I let her order for me because she knows some safe stuff I like. If I’m not with her I just order California Rolls unless they have deep-fried sushi on the menu because I know I like that. Whatever kind I get, I drown the first one in soy sauce and enough wasabi to make me cry then as soon as the waiter gives me CPR, I eat another one. Really fun. Melissa was so proud of me for trying something new. She said, “Right about now, Mom, I’m picturing you on the Texas Cyclone (the terrifying, rickety roller coaster at the old Texas icon, Astroworld), with your hands straight up in the air, practically free falling down the steepest part, screaming happily like me and Dad instead of riding The Serpent with all the five year olds.” I looked at her dryly and said, “It’s just Sushi. I’m not even sure I like it.” I hate roller coasters. I liked the Serpent. The one at Astroworld anyway. Not the one in the Garden. Nor the one in my business. After loading up the car and making one last stop at Anthropologie (and me griping about the price-tags), we headed home because we had lots of preparation to do.
The girls and I threw a Mexican Fiesta at my house for Mother’s Day Eve with Keith’s parents, our dear forever friends, Johnnie and David Haines (we raised our kids together), both sons-in-law and, of course, the Master of Ceremonies, the Little Mister. We ordered fajitas from a really terrific place by Curtis and Amanda’s then made all the fixings around it. Melissa made the best queso from scratch that you have ever tasted in your life. I’ve never seen so many things go into queso. Whatever happened to Velveeta and Rotel, for crying out loud?? She also made guacamole from scratch with an equal number of ingredients. I never saw so much chopping in my life. I just cleaned up behind her. Didn’t know what else to do. Amanda made a sopapilla cheese cake that was honestly one of the best desserts I’ve ever tasted. She left it at my house last night late and, after I ate nearly half of it, explained that she didn’t take it home because “you would not believe all the fat that went into that thing!” She said, “I knew I didn’t want it at my house!” Thank you, Amanda.
We had the best time, laughing and talking, and playing with Mr. Center of Attention. Lis and Colin had gotten him a ton of toys. One of them was a big bubble maker. By the time the evening was over, we all needed a “Slippery When Wet” sign hung around our necks. We were all suds but no duds. (I’m proofreading this now and realizing that I might need to explain that by “duds” I don’t mean clothes. I mean party poopers.) Everybody got into the action. It was only about 95 degrees in the shade. Houston is just perfect for eating outside if you can avoid encephalitis from twenty-five mosquito bites per leg. It was a terrific evening. Really.
I love the fact that our blog is for anybody who will give us the privilege to serve her, whether single, married, divorced, or widowed. I try not to overdo the wife and mother thing because our single siestas bring something so important to this mix but on this day everybody understands. So with your permission, I just want to say that I love being a mother. I’ve never had a harder job but I have never done anything in the human realm that gave me more sustained joy. My parenting days won’t be over until my days are completely over but here are a few things I’ve learned along the way – and many of them from making mistakes and getting to try again:
*Kids are pretty danged resilient. Ours survived some rough times but knew their struggling parents – fighting so hard for wholeness – loved them like crazy (and sometimes just loved them crazy) and were steadily trying to get healthier and healthier. When Keith and I each came to conclusions that we were messed up enough to mess them up, we went to counseling. The girls knew it and respected it.
*They don’t expect their parents to be perfect but they sure as heck expect them to be real. They despise hypocrisy and disrespect what is disrespectful even if they’re too scared to say so. They respond well to genuine apologies and, in fact, don’t learn to extend them otherwise.
*They need lots and lots of hugs and kisses even if they act like they don’t. They need to be told “I love you so much” over and over even if they don’t seem to be listening. They are. Don’t just give in to a sullen child and become sullen with him/her. Some kids have everything to lose if you let them win. Keep fighting for a relationship and try to take interest in their interests and sooner or later, they’ll cave in and smile. I respect few parents on earth more than Dr. James McDonald (pastor of Harvest Bible Chapel in the Chicago area) and his wife, Kathy. When one of his kids became a teenager, he felt an unfamiliar distance grow between them. He became so worried when it persisted that he told his church he was going to need to take some time off and wasn’t sure how long. With Kathy’s blessing, he told the teenager to pack a bag and get in the car with him. He drove out of the driveway, and took off on a road trip, explaining to the child that they’d return when their relationship was mended. Needless to say, after some very awkward hours, they ended up talking, crying, laughing, and making memories that they’ll have for a lifetime. Now, that’s some fine parenting.
*They need to laugh a ton with their parents and be silly. There need to be lots of private jokes that only family understands. When both girls married, those were the things they recalled to their daddy and me most.
*They need to know that God is not just the Boss. He’s the biggest blast in all of life. They love to learn the wonders of God in creation. Things like how He made a bumble bee to fly even though it’s aerodynamically impossible and how animals exist in Africa and Asia that we’ve never even seen in a zoo. They long to be taught simple pleasures that cost nothing more than a moment of time away from the TV, computer or cell phone – like marveling at a sunset or applauding God over a sunrise and clipping roses from a bush and putting them in a vase. Or watching roly-polies. Digging up earthworms. Fishing for a perch. Beholding a lady bug on a tree trunk. That all of these things are wonders of God and that He’s worth jumping up and down over.
*They need to know the beauty of Christ when they’ve done something wrong and feel guilty. They need to know that they have a destiny; that Christ planned their lives for this exact time in history and has given them gifts to discover and develop as they grow up. That they are important because He’s so important. That nothing so bad can happen to them that He can’t use for good. That Mommy and Daddy can’t make them Christians. They have to accept His free gift of grace and invite Him into their hearts. That we think nothing is worthier of celebration than that and we’ll risk throwing out backs out to do cartwheels when they let Christ do something wonderful in their lives.
*They need their parents to follow through. To say “no” when “no” needs to be said. They need their parents to be parents at the risk of being very unpopular. They need parents to intervene in an unhealthy relationship with the opposite sex. They need not to be given so many material things (even if we can afford it) that they grow into discontented, narcissistic adults. Nothing is less pleasant than a thirty year-old brat.
*And when they become parents, they don’t need their parents to turn their noses up at them and act all pious like they never lost patience with their kids. They know better anyway. They don’t need parents to forget how hard having preschoolers was and tell them, “These are the best years of your life!” No, these are the most exhausting years of your life. Wonderful! But exhausting! They need us to maybe chip in and pay for them to get their houses cleaned from top to bottom every now and then rather acting like we wish they were better housekeepers.
*Their friendships with their siblings need to be high priority. This one I blew so I share it with you as a regret. I regret allowing them to bring friends along so often on family outings. Yes, they begged but I wish I’d more often said “no.” Yes, they’d have pouted. But they also would have gotten over it and turned to each other. We always had their friends around and I think it may have kept my girls from making good friends of each other for a very long time. Don’t misunderstand what I’m saying. I think it’s also really weird when parents severely restrict the home to family and don’t encourage their kids to make friends and get involved at school. Me? I think they’re hiding something. There’s something really freaky and cultish about sequestered homes. (NOT in your wildest dreams talking about home-schoolers! I’m talking about homes where virtually no one but the family members who live there are allowed. I think that’s weird but what do I know??) At the very least, kids don’t end up developing social skills and, instead, become really bizarre adults that can’t get a normal job. Sorry. My point is, I think there should be a pretty steady dose of activity just for family so kids have to play with each other instead of ganging up on each other with their peers. I believe in having a revolving door to my children’s friends and having tons of spend-overs but I am convinced that I allowed it so often that my kids made better friends than each other. Our best memories are from family vacations where Amanda and Melissa were all they had. Joyfully, they are best of friends today but it’s because, when they moved to different cities, they learned that nobody is like your sister. Take it from me. I have one sister that I never lay eyes on. Don’t even know for certain where she is. Doesn’t sober up enough to have a conversation. Let alone a relationship. I miss her so much. We were inseparable growing up. You feel incomplete when you’re out of sorts with a sibling. They’re too much a part of who you are. No one should be a better friend than your sister.
*God gives lots of grace to parents. Good thing, huh? Let me offer you some encouragement based not only on my experience but that of many other people I’ve known. If you give a rip and try a flip, this whole parenting thing often turns out so much better than you thought it would. Sometimes you can’t even believe that’s you your kids are talking about. You realize they forgot some things. And now you need to, too. Praise You, Lord, for parenting mercies.
Amanda and Melissa, you are the greatest daughters God ever could have given me. So witty. So funny. So loving. You make me think. You make me laugh my head off. You make me spend. And you make me pray. Boy, do you make me pray. Amanda, Happy Mother’s Day yourself. Oh, my word, you are a fabulous mom. Melissa, Amanda and I can only imagine the fun mom you will be one day. What a blessed child that will be. Never a dull moment.
Oh, wow, Siestas. I went on longer than I meant to. So, instead of closing, I’ll go on a minute longer. I thought if you wouldn’t mind humoring me, Mother’s Day might be a sweet day to share a poem God gave me many years ago when I was sitting in a hotel room in a city where I was speaking. It was a rare occasion when I left on a Thursday instead of a Friday and I was miserable thinking about how my children would have to get ready for school without me. I was so homesick I could hardly stand it. I’ve read it here and there along the way so you may have heard it before but it’s dear to me, especially today, so handle it. It’s the only poem I ever memorized. No, it’s not a sacred one…unless you think parenting is sacred. And I do.
It happened just exactly like this:
I called to check on home last night
To see if all was going right
My man assured me all was well
And it was true…I could tell.
I felt so far away from home
So by myself, so all alone
No noise here, no bouncing balls
No fussing kids, no endless calls.
I asked if everything was set
I didn’t want him to forget
To take care of the “mother things”
To hang their shirts and crease their jeans.
He said, “Your oldest set her clock
She’ll get us up right on the dot
Don’t worry now, they’ll get to school
We love you much, we’ll see you soon!”
The phone went dead. I wasn’t through…
I barely said, “I love you, too.”
I sat and stared down at the floor
“She’s never set her clock before.”
She’s just a kid, not old enough
To wake without a mother’s touch
What chance is there at school they’ll say,
“You’re one great kid! You’re loved today!”
Kids need to hear those words first thing
Before a careless clock can ring
And furthermore, they like, I frowned,
Hot cocoa when they first come down!
“Dads,” I thought, and fell in bed
Then after while to myself said,
“He’s probably right, give them a break
She is fifteen, for heaven’s sake.”
“Fifteen,” I sighed, “Where has it gone?
Since that first day before the dawn
When she and I told secrets dear
And her first bath was in my tears?”
I’d held her close with just one arm
Reached for the phone to call my mom
“Oh, Mom,” I sobbed, “I love her so!”
She cried as well and said, “I know.”
The years are mean…they rush on by
The kite string slips into the sky
She’s nearly grown, yes, plenty old
To wake up when the clock says so.
I felt so sudden like a fool
It won’t take Mom to get to school
How silly…they will all be fine
Just go to sleep and rest your mind!
I tried to let the dawn go by
Without a call to check and pry
To see how everyone had fared
Got your lunch? Homework prepared?
I finally grabbed the phone and dialed
It seemed to ring a country mile
My heart sunk swift…they must be gone
Dad’s out the door…dog’s on the lawn.
I started to hang up the phone
Until I heard a voice on
The other end as up he leapt
“For heaven’s sake, we’ve overslept!”
Suddenly the house lit up
He threw the phone, said, “Kids, get up!”
I heard each voice at a time
They were mad, but they were mine!
I cheered them on from miles away
I heard them readied for their day
And just before they slammed the door
She yelled, “Thanks, Mom!”
That’s what I’m for.
Tags: Parenting
3 things:
1) My sweet husband gave me a gift card for my favorite store for Mother’s Day; then, since we were traveling and I had a coupon that expired that day, he took me to spend it. Sigh. He didn’t understand. He thought we would walk in, pick something out, walk out. Instead (of course) I tried on everything I thought might be cute, picked out my favorites, figured out which ones we could afford…an hour later he was impatiently saying things like “Fine, yes, that looks great, I don’t know which one is cuter, they both look good, get whatever you want.” Next year I’m going with my Mama. But I still love the gift! And the giver.
2) Our travels included Houston, and my hubby went to HEB for seasoned fajita meat and tortillas, and teased me when he got home that he saw you there, and talked to you about me. He’s so funny.
3) Someone needs to share that sopapilla cheesecake recipe.
Sounds like fun!!
I loved the punchline in the poem… they overslept. How funny.
I am so jealous that I can’t make it to the Siesta Fiesta in August. Hopefully this won’t be the last time you guys do something that fun.
Blessings, Lynn
Thank you for sharing. I needed to hear everything in your blog. May God bless you for your wisdom and the ablity to share openly.
Sincerely,
Mary in Alabama
I’ll take the recipes for the queso, guac, and cheesecake, por favor.
I have wanted to post to my dear siestas about my sweet angel, Alyssa, who went home to be with Jesus on April 17. She was hit by a drunk driver. Needless to say, my mother’s day was hard to get through. No matter what her sister and I do, we cannot seem to escape the fact that our little angel is not with us. At only 19 yrs. old, Jesus decided my work with her on earth was done and she went home. I would like for my siestas to pray for us. She lived with me and find myself so alone. I know that with His help we will move on. Her sister is 25 and has a baby girl, McKenna 3 and we are expecting my grandson in September.
I have a lot to be thankful for even in the horribleness of it all.
If you wish to write me separately my email is [email protected].
Laura
I always LOVE your parenting help! Ever thought of doing a parenting study??? We would all love it! What a great post.
Happy Mother’s Day to all of you!
Kasey Ewing
Mother’s Day was wonderful for me. We ate Chinese and I sat across from my two favorite women–my mom and my daughter. What a blessing. I cry every Mother’s Day because God gave me such a wonderful daughter. I couldn’t have children so God led me to a man who had a little 1 1/2 year old that was so precious. Now she is 18 going on 19. Hard to believe the years have passed so quickly. I am truly blessed.
Hey, I want that Sopapilla Cheese Cake recipe…share for heaven’s sake.
Sheryl
Happy Mother’s Day, Beth! Thank you for your encouraging words and loving heart. You love so big and so well. May we learn to do the same. I think the 2 highlights of my Mother’s Day were when I was leaning over, cutting the crust off of my son’s toast and he grabbed my neck and gave me a big huge two armed hug and when my 8 yr old daughter handed me the poem she had written me at school and in it she said she was blessed to have me for a mom. Oh, His mercies never cease and never cease to amaze me!
Love, Amy in OK
Great Reminders Beth….Thanks. My daughter is grown and has 3 children of her own. I am so proud of her. She is such a great, understanding, homeschooling Mom. So patient and kind and recognizing each child’s personality. My only regret for her currently is her husband has moved out. We are praying for reconciliation, but of course, we are on God’s timeline not ours.
Here are a few “funny” reminders for Mother’s Day….
Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you’ve had a baby. Somebody doesn’t know that once you’re a Mother, “normal” is history.
Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct. Somebody never took a three year old shopping.
Somebody said being a mother is boring. Somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver’s permit.
Somebody said if you’re a “good” mother, your child will “turn out good”. Somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.
Somebody said “good” mothers never raise their voices. Somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor’s kitchen window.
Somebody said the hardest part of being amother is labor and delivery. Somebody never watched her “baby” get on the bus for the first day of Kindergarten or on a plane headed for military “boot camp”.
Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married. Somebody doesn’t know that marriage adds a new sone or daughter-in-law to a mother’s heartstrings.
Somebody said your mother know you loves her, so you don’t need to tell her. Somebody isn’t a mother.
Hope you all enjoy these few quips and you had an absolutely terrific
Mother’s Day.
Blessings,
Georgia in MI
What a beautiful entry! Thanks, Bet.
VERY BEST BLOG EVER!! Happy Mothers Day!! Shalom
Thanks for sharing your life with us. Mother’s day is a difficult day for me as my Mom passed away many years ago and I have no children of my own. However, I am so THANKFUL for the childhood I had with an amazing Christian mother and never take those years for granted. Memories are the best gift a mother can give her children.
doo-dah (still having a “password challenge”)
Oh, how I loved this!
“As long as nobody’s been ugly to one of my girls at which point I can seem suddenly overtaken by invisible powers and principalities.” I’m laughing with you here because I can totally relate and LOVE the way you worded it! Happy belated Mother’s Day to all the moms here. I loved your poem Beth…I’m the mother of one twelve year old daughter who seems to be growing up faster than I want her to. I took your words to heart about bringing friends along on family vacations. Our daughter is an only child, so we tend to have her friends here a lot and have taken them on trips with us. We’re going home to Colorado to visit family this summer but no extras are coming along. I look forward to some fun “family” times on our roadtrip. Hope all the siestas have a blessed week!
In re-reading this again, I must ask…
Would Melissa be willing to share her recipes for the queso and guacamole? Pleaaase??
5-12-08
Beth,
This post is for the single Siestas and the ones without biological little ones yet. Okay, there’s children, then’s there spiritual children. This is funny, I was reading the comments this morning, and while I was reading them, my little sister who is graduating high school this mo called me to come check her out of school, so I had to throw on some day clothes instead of wearing my pink and white pj’s and go check her out of school-if that is not a “mom” thing, I don’t know what is! I have done this kind of stuff for my younger three sisters-like changing diapers, feeding them (think spaghettio’s on foreheads!-don’t tell them I told you:) and driving them places like dr. visits. My mom works full time, and I’m a temp, so my sis was blessed that I wasn’t on assignment today! All this “mom” blessing and I still got to keep my girlish figure and my “youthful” looks-bless YOU LORD! PRAISE YOU LORD!
Beth! I am praying for your precious sister. I know God is going to do a work! One of my mentors told me that she used to have an alcohol problem and God has completely healed her of that! She doesn’t tell very many people, but I am glad she confided in me. Love my mentors! Love you too spiritual mom Beth! And your staff and fam and you too Siestas! (you’re stuck with me now, aren’t ya’ll:):) Well, sorry about the long post. Sorry:) BIG ((HUGS)) TO YOU!
katiegfromtennessee
had trouble posting, trying again…
Glad you had a blessed Mother’s Day.
I remember that poem from a Bible study and I’ve never forgotten it. Sometimes moms can get stuck waiting for big things to happen to enjoy their children. This poem helped me to realize that the joy is in all things. There is one prayer I have never seen go unanswered – every time I have asked the Lord to help me enjoy my children, He has. Until my heart could burst. Sometimes it begins with a challenge to love with a love that covers a multitude of wrongs (moms can get caught up with what needs to be fixed), sometimes it’s simply removing distractions, other times He simply opens my mind to the wonder of it all. He helps me to absorb the moments, as oppossed to just letting them all slip by. God is good and His heart beats for relationships.
Thank you for the parenting insight. I cried when I got to the one on teenagers. My oldest is 13, so I don’t have much experience parenting a teen, but I do know they need to know they are loved – even if they don’t seem to appreciate it (and even if what I relly want to do is wring his neck!).
I love hearing about your relationship with Amanda and Melissa. My mom is my best friend and my favorite shopping buddy.So to all the moms out there with teenage daughters — hang in there. The blessing will come.
Much love, Michelle
That is my very favorite of all your ponderings…. Thanks so much for sharing the wisdom from your heart. I share it with my oldest who just became a wife and all of the women in our womens group. You have truly blessed me even if it is the day after “mother’s day” Thanks again.
P.S. Can you talk Amanda into putting her recipe for sopapilla cheesecake on the blog? Sounds really tasty.
There is nothing more precious to me than being a mom. That poem just affirmed for me not to take just any job even though I am so desperate for one. My most important role is a mother & wife, work & money will have to be sacrificed, not time w/ my family. Thanks for reminding me.
Jaime
Port Charlotte, FL
Thank you for the words of encouragement. Boy do I need a little grace, and to show a little grace to my 4 year old little girl. I have been a little, and by that I mean a lot less patient than normal. My little girl has discovered the joy of making a mess. the latest was to pour water into the cat litter until it was puddled, thank goodness I caught this before she started playing in it like a sand box! Combine this new found fun with a 12 week old doberman, and a half-way remodled kitchen, and a lack of paper towels due to my daughters new found hobby, and of corse the puppy, and I overreacted.
I could use some prayers for a calm spirit.
That said, I love being a mom. It is the greatest joy of my life. The blessing of being a mom has to be the biggest blessing God can give us while we are on this earth. Happy Mom’s day!
Being a mother is the best thing in the world. When your 11 year old daughter kills her first turkey and then sings a mother’s day solo in church on Sunday morning and your 13 year old son cleans his room and you can see the floor. What more could a mother want. Happy Mother’s Day to all and thinks for all of the tips.
I wrote this poem for my mom. I thought you and the others would enjoy it. I was adopted at age 4. This poem spells Happy Mother’s Day
“Her children arise and call her blessed”
And “her husband also praises her”
Proverbs 31 describes many mothers, but
Perhaps the greatest mom I know is…
You
Mama, today is the day I celebrate you
Over and over again, you have given of yourself
Thank you for putting your own desires aside for me
Healing hands and “faithful instructions” bless me daily
Even on this website, your love and compassion is evident
Rest assured, you have many jewels in your Heavenly crown
“She watches over the affairs of her household” describes you.
Down in my heart, I’m thankful you became my mother
A “woman who fears the Lord,” like you, “is to be praised”
You are “clothed with strength and dignity” so may you “laugh in the days to come”
I walked out of my daughter’s room last night and read this. I had been telling her that I was very uneasy about her current boyfriend and that she needed to take some specific steps or we would. She argue some but agreed, but kept saying it was not my place to interfere.
THen I sat at the computer and read every word of your post but cried when it said “They need parents to intervene in an unhealthy relationship with the opposite sex.”
It was a wonderful reminder that indeed I am doing the right thing!
For any of you who have done Beth’s study, “Believing God”, I touch on some of its fundamental truths in my blog posting today. I welcome your input.
peace~elaine
Thank you, Beth. I’m encouraged and your pieces of advice were helpful in raising my 4-yr-old son. Happy Mother’s Day.
Thank you for the loving advice. I lost my mom a little less than a year ago and I miss her Godly wisdom everday. As a parent of a 4 year old, 2 year old and 5 month old, I feel overwhelmed and exauhsted all the time, at the end of my rope. It’s nice to be reminded that yes I will make it through with the grace and mercy I so desperately need. Thank you for sharing your heart. (sorry for the typos..typing one handed)
Thanks Beth for a charming post, and such wonderful advice. Y’all are such a fun, loving family, that it is hard to believe that you and Keith were ever “messed up” as you put it. That’s God for you!
My two children are 11 (daughter) and 9 (son), and I am so heartened by your advice regarding friendships with siblings. We have always strived to keep family outings as “just family” and I think it contributes to my kids having strong shared memories, as well as avoiding the “two ganging up on one” syndrome.
Love and hugs, and a belated “Happy Mother’s Day!”
Adrienne
Thank you so much for the encouragement, Beth!
Beth,
You are precious and profound. God has graced you so that you can pour into us, “that is the concept of nuture” and I praise Him that I get to be a part of that. I know that your Mother’s Day was blessed.
Thank you for sharing your heart!
Your poem is a shot to my heart.
I enjoy listening to it on the cd’s “Things Pondered”. I am blessed to listen at work, such a joy. Happy Mothers Day to all the siesta’s. God has richly blessed you on that day.
Love to all
Celeste
Hey There,
Thanks for sharing your Mothers Day poem. Isn’t it nice to know that they do still need us!
I got up at 6am on Mothers Day and wrote a poem for my children I am not sure why the words just came to me as I opened my eyes. So, I got up and put pen to paper. I think they felt special when they had a homemade gift from me and there even teens! Sweet Blessings,
Margaret
wiping tears, I too, love getting to be my son’s mother. He turned thirteen last week and the pangs I feel in my belly as he develops into an awesome young man are bitter sweet. I have a poen about him as well, and will gift him with a framed copy when He becomes a father. I loved your tips, have expereinced most of them, and an added one….As I single mom, I rely on grace to get me through. The Holy Spirit will teach you things you didn’t know, especially about raising a boy. So, Happy Mother’s day to all the mom’s, all the surrogate mom’s and all the mom’s to be!
This was great reading! I’m not a mom, but my niece called to tell me “happy mom’s day by osmosis.” I talk about how all my siblings moved to Colorado and moved away leaving their children for me to take care of (they aren’t children…they’re late teens, early twenties…but still need help…A LOT OF HELP). My youngest niece said “mom gets jealous, but I just tell her I need a parent figure here and they wont move back.” I would not have minded having my own, but “mom by osmosis” works for me.
I LOVE how you love your girls!
Beth,
This may be for the next Q&A…but at what point in their lives (teenagers?)did you share your background with your girls? Was it a big sit-down talk or did you share “a little here, a little there” as they asked questions?
Anything you would like to share about this would be beneficial.
Thanks!
Mother’s day is sad for those of use who were never given the opportunity to be a Mom. And for their mothers who never got the opportunity to be a grandmom.
Thank you for your wonderful post! I have three girls(ages 16, 12, 10) and I can totally relate. I too give them “spree money” and just love watching them! I miss them when I am away, and your poem made me cry and then laugh! Thank you for sharing the “tips” also. I have tried to have a revolving door ( I am “mom” to most of my children’s friends also) , but also try to reserve “family” time when shopping, dinners out, etc. My girls have been through plenty also. I think one thing I learned early was be willing to be real and ask forgiveness with no excuses for your behavior. I have really loved transparency, and so do my girls. They know if someone is “posing” pretty quick. One of the things that makes you so endearing Beth Dear, is that a person gets the very distinct impression that you are very real and transparent with them. I love that about you. In my life, that transparency either scares the living daylights out of someone, or endears them to me immediately!
God Bless you and yours this Mother’s Day! I had a friend who always said that if she knew how great grandparenting was, she would have done it first (parenting second)! I love you all so much!
Lisa in Kirkland, WA
Happy Mother’s Day Beth and Amanda!!
It sounds like you all had fun!
I never get tired of hearing another mother’s parenting wisdom tips!
My daughters made me cards and other home made presents, it was very special. I am blessed!
thanks for those tips. love that poem! and Happy Mother’s Day to you!
Thank you for a great and encouraging post. I, too, have two girls and just love that you took them to the mall and gave them 4 hours to shop – my girls would eat that up!!
The words you shared about not always having a friend along for family outtings was a good one that I needed to hear. There needs to be a good balance there and mine definitely need to learn to enjoy one another more!!
Thank you for being a faithful servant of our Lord and Savior!
Ditto on the recipe for the queso and guac – I would love to have these if Melissa has time to share.
Blessings!
Beth,
That was a wonderful post.
I am so thankful that God is full of mercy and grace.
I definitely have messed up as a parent and I know I am not perfect but I am thankful that God is perfect and that He is my helper, my counselor, my strong tower, Heavenly Father and so much more…
Being a mom is a GREAT job and reading your poem just made me tear up and smile all at the same time.
It was beautifully written thank you for sharing.
Happy Mother’s Day
Love
Kim
Ever the wordsmith, Beth! Again I find myself at the desk with tears welling up in my eyes.
Thank you for mentioning the idea of sending someone over to clean the house! I’m praying my own Mom dropped in to read this one! LOL!
Thank you for sharing so openly. Thank you for the encouragement and pointers.
You and Keith are precious examples of how God works through parents who are willing to follow Him through all of the growin’ pains. Thank you both!
Just beautiful! My husband and girls are the best gifts from my Abba! Thank you for living this life WITH us and not AT us! You are every woman and I love you! Keep that encouragement coming… it’s one of the sweetest ways the Lord keeps me pressing on!
Happy Mother’s Day to you both! XOXO,
Catrina 🙂
Thank you for that Beth, it blessed my heart today. I love being a mom, but it is the hardest thing I have ever done, and as you said, the biggest blessing ever!
My mom and sister and I all had a similar day to you and your girls. We went out to breakfast Sunday morning and then we all hit the mall! It was a blast, we don’t get to do that nearly enough.
God is good and I praise Him for those sweet memories!
Hey Bethie-poo or how about Beth-a-Roo… LOL…thanks for the post on Mothers day, I really enjoyed it, and it is a teacher to those of us who are not moms yet (unless you count 2 dogs and 2 cats). One thing I admire about you is your candor and you haven’t remained a victim. I think that’s the best legacy you can leave a child.
I lost my mom to cancer 6 years ago, and my husband’s mom died almost 17 years ago, so ya know what we did? Betcha never guess…
We went to a Rush concert! It was my first, and it was LOUD…and was very interesting. That’s all this Airsupply lover will say.
Love you all there!
From one mom to the next, thanks for sharing. And thanks for sharing the “realness” of being a mom.
Oh, Beth. I am sitting here bawling. I have all your books and I have probably read your poem before but today it really brought back memories. I, like you, have grown children and grandchildren. They are so precious.
The tips you gave were great. I made so many mistakes but by the grace of God things are turning out well. The tip you gave about not becoming sullen with a sullen child hit home. My oldest granddaughter (12) is going through some stuff and just being a brat. Thank you for reminding me not to act like her but to show her Jesus. That is all I really want.
Thank you for your ministry. You are so real, so wonderful, such a breath of fresh air. I appreciate so much your sacrifice to all of us women. You are in my prayers.
Forever His,
Lawan Rivera
Phil 4:8
Loved this post! Thanks for sharing your family moments and wisdom with us. It was a beautiful expression of your heart. Happy Mother’s Day!
Happy Mother’s Day Beth and Amanda. Thanks for the encouraging words for us moms. You were right on with your advice and wisdom! I have 4 grown children, 2 of my own and 2 step daughters that I’ve been blessed with for almost 19 years and lived in my home for many of those years. I praise God for his grace and mercy in my life. I blew it too many times to count especially with my step daughters. Today we have such an awesome relationship after some very genuine apologies from me! I felt very loved yesterday and I know it is a precious gift from God. What really helped me with my girls was your lesson from “Living Beyond Yourself” on love! Wow, that one hit me between the eyes. With stepchildren so often you feel like your love is being dropped! So then you are tempted to give up and quit. And sometimes I did! Well that has all changed I’m not “full on” whether it is reciprocated or not (which it usually is) 🙂 Thanks for everything dear sweet Beth! God has used you in a huge way in my life.
This was amazing. So many things to comment on. First, I must comment on the sopapilla cheesecake. It is possibly the most amazingly delicious dessert I have ever tasted. It made me so happy when Amanda told me y’all would be eating that for Mother’s Day.
This was an amazing post. I learned so much in the 30 minutes it took me to read it (I had to pause often to soak in all the wisdom). Really all I can say is thank you. I can not wait to get home from work and give sweet Ella an extra long hug and a few extra whispers of “I love you”!