Our Coworker Nancy’s Story: A Faithful God, A Profusely Expensive Testimony

Hey, everybody. I so often wish you could meet the stellar women I get to serve alongside at Living Proof, especially because they serve this blog community every workday in one way or another. They are such incredible women of God and slack-jawing graces to this former pit-dweller. I want you to meet one of them today and hear her very moving story. If you’ve ever mailed a letter to Living Proof, in all likelihood, you have been touched by her. Nancy Mattingly is one of the best friends I have in this world. We have known one another for thirty years, our paths crossing often then ultimately converging in ministry. When we were very young moms, she’d come to my home once a month for a prayer breakfast with other women just like us and we’d sit cross-legged on that den floor, our Bibles wide-open, and seek Jesus with everything we had. We are both fitness junkies. She bikes and runs. I wear out an elliptical and hike. We’re both teachers by trade and by calling. We love music and we love it loud.

 

Nancy heads up correspondence at Living Proof Ministries. She heads it up because I hand-chose her. And I did so because she is wise and warm and wonderful and witty and compassionate and strong and loving. You cannot know her and miss being touched by her. The gift she has been to me is beyond estimation. My heart fell into my feet in ministry when I realized that the letters and needs filling up our LPM mailbox were more than one person could manage. I wanted to respond personally to the women who wrote in. I wanted them to know I’d heard their stories. I wanted to pray for them in response letters and give them verses that might resonate with their circumstances and challenges. I came to a point that I flat-out could not keep up with the correspondence and still write and teach Bible studies. I needed someone I could trust to the bone to head up that crucial position here at LPM.

 

And that was Nancy. She has cried with you, laughed with you, written you, prayed for you, pored over every word you’ve mailed to this address, and shared many of your stories with me and with our staff. I love her so much. And you would love her, too. We have been through so much together as a ministry staff. We rejoice together and weep together, laugh till our sides split together and bawl our eyes out together. We have each had several turns being the one who needed rallying around the most. We’ve stood by one another through such a variety of things that I wouldn’t know where to stop a list of categories. But we, as a staff of very close friends, have never been through anything harder than the story you are about to hear. I can hardly type these words to you without crying. I knew that one day – and sooner than later – Nancy would share this story because I know the woman of God she is. I knew God would be outrageously glorified. I knew that this would turn back on the devil and make him sorry he messed with her and her family. And so it begins.

 

Please meet one of the dearest people on earth to me and to all of us here at Living Proof. This is our friend, Nancy. She has a story to tell you because we at this ministry have not had the luxury of naivetĂ©. We have hurt. And we know that you have hurt. And, because of Jesus, we have hope. And we want you to have hope. We believe that our stories and journeys have been entrusted to us so that we can do what we’ve been called to do: serve women. Serve you. So, today, this is how we will do it.

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From Nancy:

Late in 2013, I was compelled to find a particular sign I’d seen a while back. I really didn’t understand why, but just knew I wanted it for our family. I needed it. It simply said “it is well with my soul”. I bought the very last one the store had, brought it home, placed it on the hearth, and announced to my people, “this is our word for 2014.”

Little did I know how much I would need that reminder.

Every day.

January 28th, 2014 was a day that we will never forget, getting the news that our beloved firstborn son had taken his own life. And just like that, he was gone. And we had so many questions that will not be answered this side of heaven.

 

I can’t even put into words what shock we were in. Disbelief. Pain. My husband and I were at home that day, while all of Houston was shut down for an “ice storm” that never really came to fruition. Our Living Proof Tuesday night Bible study was cancelled for that evening.  Otherwise, I would have been right there serving with my coworkers. Looking back on it, the cancellation was such a personal gift from Jesus because it put me home with my man where we received the news together. We had just finished some chicken and wild rice soup, and were watching a movie.

The doorbell rings, and I go to answer it.

Two policemen were at our door asking for my husband. (You would typically think something terrible immediately, seeing police at your door, however I didn’t, as we had been dealing with the police in the last month over a stolen bicycle. So, for some reason, I thought it had to do with the bike, and cheerily welcomed them in.) It was then that they told us the devastating news of Kyle.

No words.

“If Your revelation hadn’t delighted me so, I would have given up when the hard times came.” Psalm 119:92, The Message

 

Shock can begin immediately and with a vengeance. And it did. We both had such severe issues, but tried to listen to all the police were telling us. Once they left, I remember that we sat on the couch, held hands, and my very strong husband prayed. Oh, how we needed Jesus! In that moment, and in the days to come….

And He was there.

He supernaturally held us through the longest of days and nights.

Through the terrible phone calls to our other children, all living out of town.

Through arranging international travel to get our daughter home from Hong Kong where she had moved just 2 weeks earlier to nanny some children of special missionary friends.

Through the pacing and the arranging and the decisions and the deep desire to go to bed. Then we’d finally get there only to lay there, unable to sleep.

But God Was There.

Whatever kind of believer you are before tragedy happens, you get to decide again after the tragedy: do I believe? And the answer for me was absolutely yes. I had nowhere else to go but my Jesus.

“This I know: God is for me.” Psalm 56:9

People are interesting, especially in the ways they process crises. Some trickled into our home as the news spread. Even in the midst of the first few hours of our new reality, we were able to find humor. And since humor is best shared, I had a dear, beloved life-long friend with whom to share it. We got bent-over tickled over one specific incident, and I realized even then that it was just another grace gift from the Lord. It was a brief respite from the overwhelming grief.

And it set the tone of the year, where we would dance: between the waves of deepest grief, and the pockets of joy.

I also found that, throughout my grief, I had to balance my sadness and loss, my overwhelming sense of failure as a mother, and my fear and anxiety for my family

WITH

the obvious care and tending the Lord was doing, the gratitude I had in all that He had given us through our children, and especially through Kyle himself.

I thanked Him for the gift of 32 years with my son. I was grateful, so grateful, for the outlandish gifts my other children were to me. I marveled at this man I had been married to for 34 years and at his ability to articulate all that we were going through. And, I was actually able to see that my son, my beautiful son, was free from what had tormented him.

I could certainly praise my Jesus for that.

Oh, but the loss! And the sheer gut-wrenching longing that he would have received the help so eagerly offered him instead of deciding to be finished…

“I will offer You a sacrifice of thanksgiving and will worship the Lord.” Psalm 116:17

Can I tell you a bit about my son?

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He was a delight from his first moments of breath on this planet. He was full of energy, and when I say “full”, I mean over-the-top action all the time. He took me out of my comfort zone in those first years with his outgoing personality and zest for life. He’d talk to every person we passed during our days of doing life together while I would tend to be quieter and shyer. Oh, but not Kyle. He ran hard after everything that delighted him. And made some noise doing it. He had such a generous heart and an impish grin that really did let you know trouble was coming. School became a mix of many victories and many areas to work on. Though he was definitely high maintenance, he was also highly entertaining. And the joy, oh mercy, the joy! We knew a full measure of joy with this son of ours, and at the same time, we knew our desperate need of Jesus, too.

 

That truly became our story later in his adult years. While, on the one hand, we watched God give him such beautiful opportunities to share his love of the outdoors with others, we also saw such a need for Jesus to rescue him from his depression and sadness in his last several years. Kyle was a mountain man… a very successful mountain guide, ice climber, avalanche educator, and, in the slower months and on the side, he did rope-access work on those huge windmills. He was well-respected in every capacity.

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Gosh, even today, the loss can overwhelm me…

“For He Himself is our peace.” Ephesians 2:14

Early on in the loss of Kyle, I made a deliberate decision not to hide. To be honest, I truly wanted to hide but even more so I wanted to see God glorified through some measure of this grief. So, I would post a picture or two on various social medias and share some words. I would do anything to keep some other mother from this kind of devastation but I don’t begin to know how.  What I can do, however, is just trust God to work through my willingness to share. He alone can make anything good out of this story. I realized early on in our loss, that as hard as my husband and I worked to help Kyle – to encourage him and guide him and certainly to love him – that he was an adult and made his own decisions.

 

While I never, ever would have chosen this story for my precious family, I do get to choose what I do with it. And I get to praise my Jesus. I get to believe Him, even if I’m overwhelmingly sad, grieving, or undone. Bless His holy name.

 

Thank you for understanding that many aspects of our experience, we simply think are too sacred, too private for sharing or discussing. But what I can say is this: if someone you love is isolating himself/herself, do everything in your power to reach out to the person and pull him/her back into a safe circle of loved ones. I have seen the damage done by the enemy when he draws people in crisis away from their safe place, their safe people. Of course, we did do everything we knew to do in our own circumstance. Just looking back, I so wish I could have changed this outcome.
*May I just enter a note here to those of you who are personally dealing with deep depression, mental illness, chaos in your home or a lack of hope for any reason? Please seek help. And continue to get it. Don’t isolate yourself. Believe those who love you when they tell you how valuable and wonderful you are and how much you have to offer. Listen to them and not just to your own thoughts. Trust Jesus. Make plans for tomorrow. Dare to hope.

Do. Not. Do. This. Devastation.To. Your. People.

God has a plan. For you. And it’s good.

“I say: the Lord is my portion, therefore I will put my hope in Him.” Lamentations 3:24

 

I really cannot tell my story without the obvious truth that without God, Jesus, and His Word, I would have been a literal mess. (Of course many days I was, and am, still a mess, even with Him.) And I can’t talk about my faith walk without telling you that Beth and I have been friends for 30 years, and truly, no one on this planet has helped me in my faith journey more than she has. She truly has taught me how to do life as a Christ-follower. By watching her, studying with her, living my life around her life, I have gleaned such treasures of the kingdom. And I am so grateful. (Understatement of the year) Her hard pursuit of Christ, and her lavish love of her Savior have encouraged me, and strengthened me, and I am quite sure compelled me to want the same. My love of Jesus, and people, is spurred on by hers. And if I said thank you every day for the rest of my life, it would not be enough. (I know many of you feel the same way about her and what she has meant to your faith life.) Beth, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you! My heart beats even stronger for Jesus because of you, and I cannot imagine my life without Him, or you. Thank you for caring so deeply for our loss, and hurt. And thank you so much for letting me tell a bit of our story here. What a grace gift. We do not want this to be our story, but since it is, we want the Lord to receive all the glory for what He’s done. For Who He is. Thank you for the space to do just that.

 

If I may, and with Beth’s complete support and agreement, I just want to address a thought or misconception I have heard from time to time: that, if you are in ministry like Beth is, or work with someone as wonderful as my coworkers, you have no problems. Or, at least, that is what some people have suggested throughout the years. Often people ask how wonderful it is to work here. Don’t get me wrong, it truly is. These people at Living Proof Ministries are my family and I dearly love each and every one. We have had so many blasts together. However, being in full-time ministry certainly does not negate any troubles coming your way. All of us here at Living Proof have them. We have heartbreaks and disappointments and burdens just like you do. Ministry does not add a bonus protective-coating on you and your family. It does not mean that you or your loved ones won’t go through the pit of deep despair. I wish it meant that you won’t ever live out your worst nightmare, but it doesn’t. P R A Y for your Bible teachers, your church leaders, your pastors, your ministry teams, worship leaders! Honestly, when you think of them, pray for them! I know it would mean so much to them. You have no idea what they may be suffering privately.

 “On the day I called, You answered me; You increased strength within me.” Psalm 138:3

I still have so many questions, so few answers…..yet, I can rest in what I do know, what I am sure of:
*God is faithful. He has been in the past, and He will be in the future. So that must mean He is faithful today as well. With Him, I can do today.
*God has been so very near to us. (And I pray the same for you and your family, no matter what you are going through, that His presence with you will be palpable.) And, at times, when I do not feel Him near?  I know without a doubt that He’s still here with me.
*God’s Word still remains. And is for us in every circumstance. Not one Scripture fell off the page. It stands secure.
*God has never left us nor forsaken us. And I have found that, no matter what, I get to trust Him.

“Give the Lord the glory due His name; worship the Lord in the splendor of His holiness.” Psalm 29:2

 

Looking back, I can’t really believe we have survived. Truthfully, I’m not sure how we did, except Jesus. (Side note here: the Body of Christ – and community –  is a beautiful thing, especially in times of loss and devastation. Our people came from far and wide to help us, support us, and just grieve with us. Our deepest thanks to each and every person who supported us and prayed for us in these challenging times, sent cards, brought food, texted, emailed, phoned…)

 

We still miss our son every day. Every Single Day. Some days the pain is too deep for words. But our perspective now is more eternal than ever before. In our ordinary lives, we have this glimpse of eternity, with our son waiting on the other side, and we long for that. And we long for Him: our Jesus. And He is the Only One to satisfy that longing. Let Him do that for you today.

 

“for You are their magnificent strength…” Psalm 89:17

 

Thank you for listening. We at LPM care so very much for each of you and truly want to see you find full freedom and victory in Jesus. No matter what comes your way, choose Him. He is so very faithful.

 

With Love,

Nancy

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454 Responses to “Our Coworker Nancy’s Story: A Faithful God, A Profusely Expensive Testimony”

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Comments:

  1. 201
    Patricia says:

    Nancy,

    My best friend just sent me a link to your story. Thank you for coming out of the darkness with your story of love and faith in the face of unspeakable pain. There are no words to describe the incomprehensible pain of losing a child to suicide and all the stigmas attached. Im so glad Lisa sent this to me. I full heartedly understand how strongly you turned to the Lord,
    I do too! He was my lifeline and boy, did I need one.

    My life had crumbled into a million pieces 8 months ago in her apartment where I found her cold tired body, she suffered long and hard with the brain disease that took her life. She was with the Lord, due to all the stigmas I struggled deeply. Not only had my child gone home, but I was deeply ashamed that i couldn’t help her. The darkness dug in deeply with the guilt. Now I recognize this as the opposite of Jesus and find myself constantly rebuking the evil one. My faith has reached depths I did not know existed or was possible.

    I am still holding on for dear life and I look very forward to eternity. Thankfully, I beleive I have crawled out of the deepest pit of all, the sheer agony of those first few months and my stuggle to breathe. My daily stuggle to survive in the face of this horrible loss, is spent with the Lord. Im thanking Him now and not just asking Him for help. Im trying to mend my old ways and follow His will for me. This is all very difficult, but now I know its possible. He is patient with me beyond all patience, He gives me hope when I have thought there was none, He has rescued not only my daughter but myself and our family too. No, we will not ever be the same, nor should we…we are learning to live a new life with the Lord and knowing His deep love during the time of our agony. His agony is meshed with mine and I can’t even explain this gift but I feel it with every cell of my body…

    • 201.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Patricia, I am just heart sick over your story…and your profound loss. I am so so sorry. But sister, your words are so profound, so true, beautiful in a hard way… it all resonates with me….and this – “No, we will not ever be the same, nor should we…we are learning to live a new life with the Lord and knowing His deep love during the time of our agony.” yes, and yes! Oh, to know Him more, and to share in His sufferings, and to move on to purpose in it. my heartfelt prayers for you, dear Patricia, and all those who loved your daughter. Please let me know if I could serve you in any way. much love to you.

  2. 202
    Sandra Oden says:

    Praying the Lord will continue to give you the peace that is beyond understanding.

  3. 203
    Roxana Aguilera says:

    Yes!

  4. 204
    Valerie says:

    Nancy your testimony of God’s presence in your life is evident through this story – it is beyond words. I did not know what to say – and really i have nothing to say; until today an acquaintance shared with me his young (14 yr old) daughter’s struggle with suicide attempts. Of course we can pray and know that intercession on our knees before our loving and mighty God is our first and best plan – not merely our last resort. However I am left with a wonder if there is anything else to do. I see that you have answered so many posts – so I will look to see if you can recommend any resources to help this young girl. Thank you for the courage and compassion of your testimony. May the Lord be near to comfort you.

    • 204.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Oh, how I wish I had a five point answer, that would insure a victorious outcome! Yes, prayer, of course, it is essential. But I would also say counseling is a must – good, godly counseling. If your friend needs a place to go to find that in their area, Focus on the Family can help them find someone. (they also counsel via telephone) Their # is 1-800-232-6459. Anyone else have helps for Valerie’s friend?

      My prayers are with you, and with them. Thank you for your kind words.

      • Deb says:

        Explore if it is related to past or present abuse or sexual confusion. Also is there any peer pressure or peer bullying? Are there any kids or people speaking lies over her life? Has anyone threatened her that if she tells a “secret “they will hurt her or her family? I think of Michael Reagan and how at a young age his perpetrator threatened to hurt or kill (? Can’t remember exact threat read a long time ago) his father and family and he did not tell what was going on for many many years.
        At that age (14) I desperately needed someone to trust to tell my feelings of confusion from the sexual abuse I had incurred…there was no one safe. The person I did trust ended up being one of the worst things that ever happened to me because it was not a safe person! Definitely, Christian counseling and being in the Word of God is so important but most important is loving the person…right where they’re at, letting them have freedom to share their feelings and love them with the Gospel love. One of the worst things for me was Christians telling me I should be joyful when I was depressed I was in the word I was praying I was doing the things that the Word teaches us to do and yet I did not have breakthrough over the depression. For me I needed MEDICATION FOR A TIME, also I needed removed from the current circumstances, I needed Deliverance and I needed soul ties broken from the perpetrators! The Lord led me first to Meier Clinic and then to a Christian counselor that deals with sexual abuse recovery and God used this to help me get Freedom: 15 years with Samaritan’s Well ministry in Richardson, Texas. To find the root of the problem is so difficult at times. I was trying to hide the root of my problem for years because of the shame involved and what I knew was not acceptable in the Christian morality. It took someone that could except me in my ugly place and apply the truth of the gospel to get me free. I hope this is acceptable answer and helpful …if it’s not delete it from the blog.

  5. 205
    Audrey says:

    Thank you so much for sharing. I have struggled with anxiety and depression for years to the point that it is so paralyzing. I have cried out to the Lord so many times. Some days I just wish my life would end. I have so much to live for; young children, a husband, family. It is so hard. I know I have read your post at just the right time.

    • 205.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      God bless you, Audrey, and thank you for commenting, and encouraging me that indeed the Lord is in this. I am praying for you right now, for a day free from the hold anxiety and depression have had on you. And then for every next day…. May God truly bless you in abundant ways. He loves you so so much.

  6. 206
    Rachel says:

    I read this last week and have had you on my heart ever since. There truly can be no greater loss or grief for a parent than to lose a child. Our extended family has suffered greatly from suicide and attempted suicide. We can’t fathom the depths of despair in the minds of those who choose to end their lives. Praying for your family and for God to show himself even more to you.

    • 206.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Rachel, your prayers mean the world to us. thank you. I’m so sorry for your own family’s loss. We still have really really hard days. But God has never left us. Grateful even in the midst. Thank you for your comment.

  7. 207
    Deb Mott says:

    Dear Nancy, I thought of you this morning as I read a commentary on First Peter. The theme of suffering and the theme of glory is evident throughout the letter. The encouragement that Peter gives suffering Saints is the assurance that their suffering will one day be transformed into glory. It says “this is possible only because the Savior suffered for us and then entered into his glory. First Peter 1:11; 5:1 Peter is preeminently the apostle of hope, Paul the apostle faith and John of love.” “As believers we have a living hope because we trust a living Christ. First Peter 1: 3.” I thought about the fact that we have a living Savior in us And He can fill us with hope! How I need this, some days = critical need, and I must stand on the truth over my feelings. The commentary goes on and says “this hope enables us to keep our minds under control and hope to the end when JESUS shall return.” first Peter 1:13. We must not be ashamed of our hope in God but be ready to explain and defend it. Then there’s a warning: “suffering does not automatically bring glory to God and blessing to God’s people. Some believers have fainted and fallen in times of trial and have brought shame to the name Christ. It is only when we depend on the grace of God that we can glorify God in times of suffering. first Peter 5:12 “I have written to you briefly, encouraging you and testifying that this is the true grace of God. Stand fast in it.”
    It appears you have brought glory to God in your times of suffering. I pray that the Lord gives you increasing Grace to continue to give him glory and testify of the true grace of God by standing fast in it. I pray this for myself and all in the body that is suffering. Such an important message especially as the fiery trials of the future may come our way.

  8. 208
    cameron dorton says:

    Nancy, I am just reading your post on LPM. I am so blessed having read it and about Jesus’ precious presence for you and your family. I can not imagine how devastating it was and is at the loss of your son. My heart aches at the thought, and I don’t even know you. I do however have a son who struggles with depression, as do I, he is alone as far as a significant other and I worry so about him. Your story urges me to pay special close attention to him. I do already; that is as close as he will let me be with his independence.

    Thank you for sharing your story it is very brave to do so.

    Cameron

    • 208.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Oh, Cameron, I am praying for your own beloved son, right now. May God truly show Himself to be so faithful in his life, and in his future. Thank you for your sweet words, and support. I’m blessed by your kindness.

  9. 209
    Holly says:

    Holly – West, TX
    The joy of the Lord is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10 NIV

  10. 210
    Jerri Thompson says:

    No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.

    Matthew 6:24 NIV

  11. 211
    Addison Franse says:

    For God so loved the world he sent his one and only son that whomever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.
    John 3:16

  12. 212
    Yvonne says:

    Nancy – I just read this post and my heart goes out to you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss. I have struggled with depression on and off over the years but the hardest thing has been to watch my oldest son struggle with it too. Things were really rough for him a couple of years ago and I was so concerned he would take his own life I stayed with him for several weeks in his apartment and then moved him back home. It is something I worry about happening one day when I am not able to be there for him, or worse, even when I am. I have to give it to God and remind myself that He loves him more than I do. Thank you for sharing and reminding us that Jesus never leaves us no matter what we are going through. I am participating in Beth’s scripture memory and one of my versus was Deuteronomy 31:8. In the NIV it says, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” And Isaiah 41:13 in The Message says, “Because I, your God, have a firm grip on you and I’m not letting go. Don’t panic. I’m right here with you.” Thank you again for sharing. I pray the peace that passes all understanding is there for you and your family. ❤️

    • 212.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Yvonne, I am so sorry to read that your son struggles too. My prayers are with you right now, asking God to please release him from this grip. Free him while his two feet are still on this earth, and he can redeem what the enemy tried to steal! I pray for you as a mom to have such wisdom and discernment for each and every day. God bless you, dear one.

  13. 213
    Leanna Reynolds says:

    Leanna Reynolds Southlake, Tx Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies.
    Psalm 34:13. NIV

  14. 214
    Denise says:

    Psalm 139: 1-3 NIV
    1. You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
    2. You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
    3. You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.

  15. 215
    Lynann says:

    Lynann, Artesia,N.M.
    John 8:31-32 KJV
    Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth , and the truth shall make you free.

  16. 216
    Allison says:

    Allison, New York

    “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”

    1 Peter 5:10 (NIV)

  17. 217
    Dee says:

    Dee, Prescott, AZ
    Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 1 Peter 4:12, ESV

  18. 218
    Tanya Atwood says:

    Tanya Atwood, Tyler Texas…
    Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me”. John 14:6 NIV

  19. 219
    Allyson Flack says:

    Allyson Flack, Wichita Falls, Texas
    “We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open.”
    2 Corinthians 6:11 (ESV)

  20. 220
    Bonnie Cosby says:

    Philippians 4:8
    Finally brothers,
    whatever is true
    whatever is noble
    whatever is right
    whatever is pure
    whatever is lovely
    whatever is admirable
    if anything is excellent
    or praiseworthy- think about such things.

  21. 221
    Sharon Cox says:

    May 7, 2015
    Aransas Pass, Texas

    “My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. Psalm 62:1 NIV

  22. 222
    Gay Trier says:

    I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Ps. 43:4

  23. 223
    Mary Celeste says:

    You and Kyle were on my mind this morning, so I googled and came across this jewel. Thank you for your testimony, Nancy. I honor you for choosing love over fear. Glory be to God in Jesus.

    • 223.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Oh, Mary Celeste, thank you! So grateful for your encouragement, support, and prayers. God bless you.

  24. 224
    Kristi Hood says:

    Every good and perfect gift is from above.
    James 1:17

  25. 225
    Heidi Nielsen says:

    Heidi Stow, Ma “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12

  26. 226
    Dee says:

    Dee, Prescott AZ
    Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8, ESV

  27. 227
    Tanya Atwood says:

    Tanya Atwood, Tyler, Texas
    “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord,
    not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheiritancefrom the
    Lord as a reward. It is the Lord God you are serving.” Colossians 3:12-13
    NIV

  28. 228
    Ann Royal says:

    Spring Lake N.C.
    Better is one in your courts than a thousand elsewhere;
    I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.

  29. 229
    Paula Counce says:

    Dear Nancy,
    Thank you for so eloquently suggesting that Christians can raise a child in the church and under the admonition of the Lord and who professes faith in Christ and who still becomes mentally ill. My son is being treated for paranoid schizophrenia in a hospital today after nearly two years of homelessness. As he improves slowly, we can see how God is working and bringing glory to Himself.

    • 229.1
      nancy mattingly says:

      Paula, I am just heart-sick over your own challenges with your son. Thanking God right now that he is getting the help he needs, and praying that he continues to improve and strengthen! Thank you for your comment, may God bless you with His profound peace.

  30. 230
    Paula, Gillett says:

    Paula, Gillett May 16, 2015

    “The Lord shall be unto thee an everlasting light, and thy God thy glory.”
    Isaiah 60: 19 KJV

  31. 231
    Becky, Raleigh NC says:

    “‘For I know the plans I have for you’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'”

  32. 232
    Allyson Flack says:

    Allyson Flack, Wichita Falls, Texas
    “Even though the fig trees have no blossoms,
    And there are no grapes on the ones;
    Even though the olive crop fails,
    And the fields lie empty and barren;
    Even though the flocks die in the fields,
    And the cattle barns are empty,
    Yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
    I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!”
    Habakkuk 3:17-18 (NLT)

  33. 233
    Carol DePriest says:

    Ephesians 1:4 NLT

    Even before He made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in His eyes.

  34. 234
    Donalee says:

    Donalee Cushman, Houston, TX

    John 17: 24 NIV
    “Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.”

  35. 235
    Denise says:

    Psalm 139: 4-6 NIV

    4 Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.

    5 You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.

    6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  36. 236
    Margaret says:

    Margaret, Bellaire, Texas
    I can do everything through him who gives me faith.
    Philippians 4:13

  37. 237
    Miriam Nikkila says:

    Kearney, NE

    As the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return to it without watering the earth an making it bud and flourish so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so it My Word that goes out from My mouth. It will not return to me empty,but will accomplish what I desire and achieve, the purpose for which I sent it.

    Isaiah 55:10-11

  38. 238
    Diane says:

    Diane-Lenexa,KS
    Psalm 19:2 NIV
    Day after day they pour forth speech, night after night they display knowledge.

  39. 239
    Terese Kay says:

    Terese Kay Black Earth WI
    NIVbible
    Colossians 3:15

    Let the peace of christ rule in your hearts, since as members
    of one body you were called to peace, And be thankful

  40. 240
    Leila X says:

    Very interesting, thanks for sharing.

  41. 241
    Becky Mixon says:

    Nancy,
    I lost my 26 year old son to suicide February 2nd 2019. This has been the most difficult thing I have ever faced and the pain is truly indescribable. I am a Christian and I know that I have recieved strength from God just to make it day to day. I am encouraged by your testimony and admire your strength. I hope and pray that I will be able to use this tragedy for something good. Please help me pray that I will be attentive to the voice of God as he directs my steps as well as the steps of my family.

    Sincerely,
    Becky Mixon

  42. 242
    Amy says:

    Hi. Thank you very much for this publication. Nancy, thank you for sharing you story and the hope that you found in the middle of your terrible trial. Three months ago our oldest son, our first born, took his life. He had been struggling with severe anxiety and depression most of his teen and adult life. He was only 24 when he died. We are obviously heartbroken and devastated. I continue to find myself searching the internet for encouragement and help. That’s how i came across your article. My husband is in full time ministry with Young Life. We know how often this happens to families but it just seems so unbelievable that this has happened to us. I really really struggled the first few months. The enemy was really at work on me filling me with doubts that Mack was saved and doubts of God’s goodness. It was torturous! But the Lord has been so kind to bring me assurance and peace! I feel like now I just have to be sad for my temporary loss and that I will see My precious son again. Before I had thoughts like “if Mack was saved why did this happen?” But God helped me see that Jesus saved Mack because He knew this was going to happen. Thank you again for sharing your story. Your words were very encouraging. You helped me feel like I will get through this. And I so need that hope.

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