Thinking About Death and Healing

Hey, my Darling Ones!

I’m sitting in the bed in my jammies with pillows propped up behind my back on a rare morning off. I’ve just finished my quiet time and on my second cup of coffee. (I’m obviously a little behind on the coffee.) Keith’s still sound asleep and the dogs are in the backyard playing in some fresh mud. Oh, what they have done to my beautiful garden yard! But that’s another story. My mind is full of other things and I know a few good friends who might help me process it.

It’s Good Friday. I tend to have lots of heavy thoughts around this day every year. I do love Christmas so very much but I am far more moved by the season of reflection on the Cross of Christ and the celebration of our only true hope: His glorious resurrection. We are obviously so much surer of the timing of His Passion than we are His birth. We really can say, “Approximately this many years ago, this happened right around this exact time.” Anniversaries are a powerful thing.

Yesterday I served at the memorial service of a fellow servant of Christ. She was just a few years older than me and her children, both boys, are the same ages of my girls. Belinda and I don’t really have a family history together, though. We have a shared history of faith. Years ago, I suppose somewhere around 1990, I started teaching my first ungraded women’s Sunday School class. I’d been teaching for years by that time but was a constant source of irritation to my department head because women came to the class who weren’t the right age and some of them were even “single!” (To be fair, it really was supposed to be a class of young marrieds from 29-32.) I’d finally even been reported to my pastor, Brother John Bisagno, who called me into his office, laughed his head off and said, “I’m about to set you free.” And Dayspring Class was born. Any woman of any age could come.

I cut my Biblical teeth on that class. I really did. I’ve told my beloved Curtis many times that there’s nothing like being thrown out there to teach week after week after week. (He’s doing that very thing, by the way.) Blowing it over and over then having the courage and the humility to get back up there again. It gets a communicator out of the habit of delivering a few overly-perfected speeches with just the right punch lines but a dwindling anointing – and pitches them out there into the world of high risk and steady criticism. Separates the men from the boys, so to speak. It is HARD WORK. Make no mistake. Don’t ever wish for it. Do it only if you must because it is your God-given gift and not to use it would be disobedience. It’s too hard otherwise and too much flesh can get tangled up in it. “Be ye not many teachers, because you will be more harshly judged,” James warned us. But back to Belinda.

Early on in our class, this darling, petite blonde (bleached, like yours truly) entered our ranks with a personality that stole the hearts of every person in the class. Or, then again, it was her story that stole our hearts. She became quite a center of attention because she’d battled breast cancer several years before and it had come back with a vengeance. By the time I got to know Belinda, the doctors had told her that cancer had spread to her bones all the way from her skull to her knees. She was covered. Almost hopeless. Only that wild woman absolutely refused to give up. Her boys were still young and she intended to see them to manhood.

I have no idea why things work the way they do. I’ve seen mothers just as determined to raise their children yet die of cancer in only a few months. These things are only for the fathomless mind of God. We can’t figure them out for the life of us. But if I were to offer a little conjecture, with His permission and patience, I’d tell you that maybe He gave Belinda those extra years (somewhat like Hezekiah) so that she could teach a tight-knit group of women how to put their faith where their big mouths were. She sought the Lord for Scriptures then told us what to pray for her and how to pray and that, if we were going to doubt, not to bother. And all of this in the most winsome way. She had the cutest personality ever. Several in our class nicknamed her Bubbles. I never could bring myself to do it. Too cool, maybe. But I tell you what I did call her. I called her a warrior. As I told them yesterday, I have never known a more courageous woman in all my life.

Some years later, I was asked to move to a different Sunday school hour to teach and I left my beloved Dayspring Class to the plans God had for them. Most of those women stayed intact and still study and worship together today. Belinda came to my new class many times but it was so large that it did not lend itself to the closeness we’d all enjoyed before. By this time, we no longer had the same need to pray for Belinda anyway. She was thriving. God had indeed given her what she’d so vehemently asked. There were others who moved to the top of our prayer lists.

Then about six months ago, at a Tuesday night Bible study, I saw Belinda at the altar weeping during praise and worship. (Our worship time is also an open-altar time and it is very, very special.) I went to her with haste and she looked up at me with an expression I’ll never forget. “Beth, it’s back. And if the Lord doesn’t heal me, I’m going to die.”

I felt it in my gut. I knew this time He was going to take her Home. That somehow her job was done. Though her assignment was undoubtedly much broader than this, God had used her to teach a group of women (of all ages, praise His Name!) how to pray with wild faith. Our lives had been changed forever. We’d seen first hand a little of what God could do.

Yesterday morning I grabbed my Bible, my black purse, and a prayer journal from 1994 that I’d taped a precious blonde woman’s picture on and headed to my church. We celebrated Belinda Edgerton’s life in a chapel packed full of people from all dimensions of her life. She’d made a mark on everybody from her coworkers at Shell Oil to her neighbors right there on her cul-de-sac. As I reflected on her life and thought about what I wanted to share, God brought the woman out of Luke 8 to my mind who pressed through the crowd to get to Jesus. She reached through the push-and-shove of public spectacle with the purity and simplicity of desperation. She somehow latched on to the hem of His garment and, let this fall afresh, she was healed.

We don’t hear any more about that woman. Lord have mercy, she must have told her story a jillion times to anybody who would listen. But somewhere over there in Israel, her body has turned to ashes just like all her friends. It occurred to me that, while we are here on earth in these flesh-and-blood mortal bodies, all we can hope for is a hem of healing. Even if Belinda had been completely healed of her cancer, she would still have gotten sinus infections, stomach viruses, bad knees, and, one day, her sons still would have gone to her funeral. She just might have been a tad older. These bodies of ours are fashioned for a flash of time on this planet. God has healed all of us of many things but, in His great purposes, we can only grab the hem. Even a miracle of instant restoration from a terminal disease is still just a hem of healing.

One day we will trade the hem for the real Him. No more pressing through the crowd wondering if we’re going to be among the few that see that kind of miracle. We will see Him. Jesus Christ, the risen King. We won’t just touch the edge of His cloak. We will touch the God-man Himself in His spectacular immortal body but, significantly, one still bearing the scars of His visitation here. His wholeness is so utterly complete and infinitely perfect that we, upon the very sight of Him, will be made whole as well.

This, Beloved, is what we live for. Not for just another day here. But for that very day there.

Several months ago, Melissa had insisted upon going with me to have a dye test to follow up a suspicious mammogram. (No rumors please. I do not have breast cancer. Because my mother died with it, however, I never get the luxury of drama-less annual check-ups.) We were sitting in the waiting room and a rack was within arms reach offering all manner of brochure on various cancers. Melissa took one out after another and glanced over them, shaking her head. She looked up at me with that classic expression of hers and said, “Life is brutal, man.”

I nodded.

We both sat silently for just a moment.

Then she said one of the most profound things I’ve ever heard.

“He knows it’s scary to be us.”

Yes, He does. Yes, He does. He does NOT take the fact lightly that we go through medical tests to see if we have a raging cancer. He does NOT take lightly that some of you are secretly fearing that the monster has come back. He does NOT take lightly that some of you are going through the cancer treatments of your own children. I had to pause and put my hand over my mouth on that one. Holding back the tears.

Son of David, have mercy on us! You know it’s scary to be us! It’s almost too much here, Lord. It’s almost too much.

And the thunder crashes in the heavens and the earth grows dark in the middle of the afternoon and a man, beaten to a bloody pulp, cries from a cross between two thieves, “It is finished!”

And death is overcome.

One day, Sweet Darling. ONE DAY. We will trade that hem for the real Him and there will be no more sickness. No more death. No more sadness. We will all be healed.

Bliss.

BLISS.

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200 Responses to “Thinking About Death and Healing”

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Comments:

  1. 151
    JILL says:

    THANK YOU

  2. 152
    Anonymous says:

    What an amazing blog. I cannot wait to meet Belinda!! Life IS scary and would be more so if it weren’t for our great Jesus!! He has given us so much HOPE I can hardly stand it. The wondrous thing to me is, he has given us so much more than the hem…..oh to go before that throne, lay it at His feet and KNOW how much HE LOVE US!!! NO GREATER SACRIFICE for such a sorry lot!!!!!
    Thank you Beth for your lovely words and feelings.
    Bible Bunny in NO MI

  3. 153
    Kimberly and Grace says:

    Amen…Thank you Jesus!

  4. 154
    Stacy says:

    He knows it’s scary to be us.

    I thought of that as I worry about yet another day of possible tornados here in middle TN.

    I thought of that just now as I read about the death of child who I had been following and praying for in the blogosphere.

    And, that statement, brings me such comfort. I had never thought of it before…He knows that it is scary down here. He knows. He knows.

  5. 155
    Jesusistheparty! says:

    Beth, Loved the perspective from you and Melissa. Guess we’ll all just have to hang on to His hem ’cause it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!!! Regarding the dogs and your yard, my yardman always reminds me that, “Welllll, Mrs. Goodwin, you can’t have your big dogs and a beautiful yard too!” I choose the dogs (2 boxers)
    every time! Loves!

  6. 156
    Shelly says:

    I’m without words (a rare occurrence).

  7. 157
    Little Steps Of Faith says:

    Beth,
    I really am SO glad that you wrote this, especially since a dear siesta left a comment on my blog about her cancer.
    I guess in a way, even though my mom has lived with Chron’s disease since she was 23yrs old, that I don’t fear someone becoming ill, I’ve lived with it at my side my entire life. My mom has beat odds SO many times, and I KNOW that my faith in HIM, has helped her; sometimes its hard for people to pray, and it takes US to be the torch for them, to help them be guided into HIS arms.
    We are all dealing with illness in some way shape or form, just because it doesn’t have a name it doesn’t mean that we aren’t suffereing. Like you said, we are crying out to one day be with HIM in glory.
    And as I keep my bible close to my arms while I sleep, I sometimes can just feel like this life I am living is a dream. Regardless of what happens. I never write so much, sorry I did, but today I just have thoughts.
    and I am sorry, but I have my #8 scripture verse too, Ps. 16:8-11; because I couldn’t wait to memorize words that Jesus spoke again in the new testament.
    The Word has overflown within me, and it brings tears to my eyes, at HOW much I KNOW, and LOVE the verses. And HOW MUCH HE can help me retain. HE IS AMAZING!!!
    For my siesta, who left that comment, I stand in agreement to BELIEVE GOD right along with you:)
    Love you all!
    🙂 angie
    http://www.littlestepsoffaith.com

  8. 158
    darla says:

    Princess Beth, thank you for this! Praying for you and yours, and this reminded me of something that I hold dear in times of cancer and loss, something you taught me a long time ago..
    God is always faithful and true, HE promised to deliver us and HE will.

    It just may be delivering us over or around the thing, or to the other side of it, or just right in to HIS arms, sooo no matter how it works out, we have been delivered! Amen! what a wonderful God we serve, who has thought of everything! happy RIsen holiday to y’all.. love you!

  9. 159
    Sheila says:

    Beth, You have no idea how I needed to hear this. “He knows how scary it is to be us.”…what comforting words during such a very difficult time of loss and weariness for myself and so many others. I look to Him.

  10. 160
    Sandy Daron says:

    My Blessed Beth,

    I love you even though I have not personally met you!!! God has blessed you with such a tremendous gift of reaching to the very marrow of the subject!!

    I love this post!! What a very precious person, Belinda much have been!!! I was sent this by a mom whose son is fighting cancer for the 3RD time!!! You touched her so much!!!

    How blessed it is to know that we are here but only for a moment, but in eternity with Him!!!

    Praise you for your faithfulness to Him!!!

    Love in Christ,
    Cole’s (Caring Openly, Loving Eternally) prayer team
    http://www.colesfoundation.com
    Sandy Daron

  11. 161
    Anonymous says:

    Yes, it is almost too much. Married to a functional alcoholic. Wondering, praying, fasting – will my children fall into that? Have a scared 22-year old daughter who has just found a lump on her breast and I’m trying to get her into a doctor quickly…trusting in Jesus and thanking God that this life is temporary.

  12. 162
    Shelia in Alaska says:

    SO…..what dogs???……I guess I missed the arrival of new dogs after the departure of the previous two…..I will comment about the substance of the blog in a separate entry…..

    Bless you dear Beth!!!

  13. 163
    Anonymous says:

    Beth-
    What a beautiful tribute to Belinda. May we all long for the day that we touch Him.

    I have to share how much you have impacted my life. PROFOUNDLY. I have grown through trials, deepened my spiritual roots through bible study, caught a Holy passion for Jesus I never knew despite being raised in the church.

    I thank you for sharing your life, trials, mistakes as a teacher & woman. I have been facilitating bible study every one of yours and other great teachers for 12 years. I have been the topic of criticism & scorn from other leaders by bringing together women of various ages, stages & church bodies welcoming them all. Why does some in the "church" hold in bondage those who Christ has set free? PRAISE GOD for His word. Gal 5:1

    A Huge Thank you for the encouragment to press on and fan into flame the gifts God has entrusted to me. Acts 20:22-32 was a Rhema word and blessing from God to offer revealation over something I experienced that had the potential to devistate. Knowing when to exit "priceless". You are one of my mentors in ministry whom I have never had the priviledge of meeting yet has impacted me tremendously.

    Beth – I continually thank God for you and pray for you. Keep on in the Lord. Your labor is not in vain. It blesses so many Siestas.

  14. 164
    Kim ~ Kay Kay says:

    So very glad you shared this.
    Oh how inspiring!
    Yes, He knows. Glad I believe it! Makes this life a little easier to live and to press on in Him. Praise Him!! Thank you for your mercy God.

  15. 165
    praisinyahweh says:

    Beth …

    I am a six year survivor. This is what I learned. It is a scary thing to live with … it is life changing … but it can be such a blessing.

    In every lifetime there are defining moments, moments that shape and mold our very existence. Some of them are moments we embrace with grateful hearts, cherishing them while they last, wishing they would last even longer. Giving birth to my daughters, Caitlyn and Jillian, were just this type of moment. I can still remember vividly the exact moment that each of them was placed in my arms for the first time and the indescribable emotions that flooded through me. I had never known a love so deep could come from within my heart. Looking down at their beautiful faces, counting their little fingers and toes, covering them with mommy kisses, all of it was magical, and was nothing short of a miracle. On the other end of the spectrum, are those defining moments born from times difficult to endure, times that rock our lives right down to their very foundations. Often unexpected, and always unwelcome these moments seem to last an eternity. Such was the moment I found out I had breast cancer. It was if someone had slammed me onto my back, knocking the very breath out of me. I was instantly cast into a world of darkness and fear. I had never known I could feel so lost and alone.

    Although both the above moments drastically and permanently changed the course of my life, surprisingly it was not in my happiness that I drew close to the Father, but rather in my utter despair. Causing what could have been one of the deepest valleys in my life to be, in fact, one the tallest mountaintops. Not that the journey up the slope of that mountain was always pleasurable or easy, at times it was quite the contrary, but the things that I learned along the way made every step worth the cost.

    I learned that true strength lies not in independence, but in dependence. For it was only in my time of brokenness, when I was unable to carry the weight of my circumstances, that I was able to fully experience the Lord’s amazing strength. It was when I was unable to walk on my own, that He gathered me up in His arms, hugged me to His chest and carried me. In His arms, I found the strength to face my deepest fears and move past them. I had never known that I could be so physically close to God, nor that he wished to be so close to me.

    Having been a Christian for most of my life, I had tried to live a life that would be pleasing to Him. I approached my life like it was a dance, one I was doing for Him, hoping that He would approve. I had the best of intentions, but that that was not what He wanted from me. You see, my Father wanted to dance with me, to lead me and to guide me. And so, much like a child, in my sorrow I placed my feet up on His feet, wrapped my arms around Him, and He began to move me according to His desire. I was in awe that the creator of the universe would want such an intimacy with me, and, having loved Him for a long time, I fell in Love with Him. In return, I felt the love of a parent holding their child for the first time rain down upon me, and I cried. I cried because I never knew that He loved me so deeply and personally.

    This realization lead to another truth, God is only as far away as you keep Him. I know now, that the Lord is always there, waiting for each of us to seek His presence. He desires an active relationship with each of us, but it is our choice. He desires to be our master in all that we do, but it is our choice. He hears our cries of agony as we suffer and wants to help, but it is our choice. He hears our cries of jubilation as we celebrate and yearns to celebrate personally with each and every one of us, but it is our choice. He wants us to follow Him, but it is our choice. He wants us to be close to Him, but it is our choice. It is our choice to either keep Him at an arms distance, or to open up our hearts to Him, submit ourselves to His will and fulfill His greatest desires. The rewards for doing so are plentiful, but again it is our choice.

    I also learned that God is constantly speaking to us, only we don’t always take the time to hear Him. There have been plenty of times in my life that I cried out to Him in need, heard nothing and wondered why He didn’t respond. Feeling abandoned, I often blamed Him for the very circumstances He would have gladly saved me from, had I only stopped talking long enough to listen. The news of my diagnosis was so disturbing that it left me speechless, and it was then, when I was out of words myself, that I heard Him calling me. Like a Father calming a child, His words filled my heart drawing my focus to Him, rather than my problem. With my eyes fixed on Him, I followed His voice, and my journey downhill began to instantly change. It was then, and only then, that my journey to the mountaintop began. Looking back over my life, I now know that it was never that He didn’t respond to my prayers, but rather that at times I didn’t want to hear what He had to say. I have learned that being willing to hear things that might make you uncomfortable or require you to change is often difficult to do, but He has our best interests at heart. It is so very important to make time to listen.

    I learned that God can transform even the most horrible of experiences into something miraculous, when they are placed at the feet of Jesus. As difficult as it can be to give up control and lay it down, if we let Him, God will often use our individual trials to speak to those that might not otherwise hear Him. Through me, the Lord has taught others about the importance of faith, the power of prayer and the gifts he bestows on His children. Watching Him work through me, knowing that He was touching other people’s lives through my walk of faith, was in itself another defining moment in my life. Through submission and faith, the Lord has used me to spread His word and love to other people. My mother returned to the church after many years of separation, my daughter, Caitlyn, accepted Christ as her
    personal Savior and countless people have professed their lives to be changed because of my example. Although I would not have picked cancer for myself, the work of God I have witnessed through it has given the journey a value that far outweighs the costs. Each and every one of us can be an instrument of God. Shining His light, spreading His love. All we need to do it lay our troubles at His feet.

    Etched in my heart, also, is the reality that prayers are integral in the life of any Christian. While numerous earthly things constantly work to separate us from the Lord, I am convinced that prayers are the very stepping-stones that bring us back to Him. They are the medium through which He works within our lives. The challenge, however, lies not within praying itself, but in being able to accept God’s answer to them. This experience has taught me something about that as well, sometimes God says no to something that we want now because he is saying yes to something more valuable, something that is somehow connected to the very thing we are trying to escape. The bigger picture belongs to Him alone, it is often only in hindsight that we are able to examine a chain of what once seemed random events, put the pieces together, and begin to understand.

    The body of Christ is an incredible thing. It was absolutely amazing the amount of support both tangible and intangible that we received from it. It was as if our circumstances set of a ripple that went out through the church, touching many, calling to duty the servant’s heart that God has blessed His children with. I never knew it was possible to be loved by so many people, or that I would come to love so many of them! I learned that God doesn’t want us to do it alone. He gave his Son disciples, he gave us the body of Christ.

    God gave me many truths and lessons throughout this journey, but there is one that I hold dear to my heart, one I revisit often, one that has become my mantra, one that I truly believe to be the secret of living. It is not complex, and yet it came as a stunning revelation to me. Our lives are finite, and our date to return home has already been decided. I came to understand that having a life threatening disease does not change that time. In this light, it became merely something to do while I am here on Earth. I now know that each day is a gift, and the moment we are actually in is really all we are guaranteed. The days of yesterday are gone, given to the past never to return. The days of tomorrow belong only to the future, and living in pursuit of them often results in the most tragic thing of all, forfitting the moment you are in. One of the biggest challenges we face in this world is living in the here and now, but the rewards for doing so are numerous . for it is in doing this very thing that God can teach us truly to live.

    I do not profess to be a mature Christian, but He is maturing me. I have grown, and my path has narrowed from where I was before this journey began. There are still so many things that I don’t know. But there is one thing that I know for sure. God spent a lot of my life following me, but now it is my time to follow Him, and I do so willingly and without reservation.

  16. 166
    Sarah says:

    Thank you for this post. My father-in-law’s cancer just returned in March, less than 4 months after he finished his last round of chemo (or so we thought). He was finally getting back to his old self – he even had hair again! – when we found out the cancer was back, or it never really left. I worry about my husband, and I worry about his family, but most of all I worry about what will happen if my sweet children lose their favorite person in the whole world, their Papa. Between that and all of the other crummy things going on in our life right now, life is hard, and at times I feel like I can’t stand up with all of the weight sitting on my shoulders.

    It is comforting to think that God knows what it’s like to be us. He doesn’t just care about us; He doesn’t just have in mind what’s best for us; but He KNOWS what we are going through. And he won’t put us through more than we can handle. I sure think I am going through more than I can handle, but apparently I’m not because God wouldn’t do that. And no matter what I have to go through, one day it will be over.

  17. 167
    Shelia in Alaska says:

    Ok, now that I have had time to read the blog……yes, I had the trauma just this January of being diagnosed with cancer after suffering for three years with misdiagnosed symptoms, then the dreadful regime of tests, and the doc appointment of the results to be told they did not find the markers but that the tests showed I had heart problems. Our bodies are but vessels while on earth to spread the gospel and be glory to God!!! So, whatever faith-building, hope-securing, love-nurturing, God-healing, trauma I have to go through – I say….bring it on since I am believing God!!!!!!!!!

  18. 168
    becalota says:

    “I will rise when He calls my name, no more sorrow, no more pain. I will rise on eagles wings before my God, fall on my knees, and rise I WILL RISE….” (Chris Tomlin: I will rise)

    Oh! I can’t wait to meet Him!

    Thank you Beth, for putting it all into perspective the way you do.

  19. 169
    Kim says:

    I love how God speaks so tenderly to my heart through you, Beth, and I so dearly love you!

  20. 170
    UnderHisWing says:

    Thank you Beth for those powerful words. Oh how I want to touch Jesus. Feel the warmth of his touch. Hear his heart beat as I lay in his arms and head next to his chest. The power of the strong heart.

    Laura

  21. 171
    Anonymous says:

    Speaking of teaching as a spirtual gift, I have been doing a study and am trying to discover and better understand what my spiritual gifting might be…it’s not teaching, thankfully, but I wondering if you have any resources that might help me better discover what they might be! Thank you for the fun posts as well as the thought provoking, life challenging, Jesus transforming ones!
    Faith in Washington

  22. 172
    Faith says:

    Much to savor in this post.
    All I can say is … amen!

  23. 173
    Anonymous says:

    Beth, thanks for being one of my very best friends even though we’ve never met. Praise you, Jesus, for bringing us together through Bible study and this blog. One day I will know bliss instead of pain. . . . and I pray that between now and then your light in me will be stronger than the darkness that surrounds it. Praise you, Jesus!

  24. 174
    Anonymous says:

    Thanks, Beth… I needed to hear that today. Just finished the Stepping Up study — I’ll NEVER look at a song the same way again! Thanks for making the Bible so alive to me. Your sister in faith, Kathy

  25. 175
    harmonysong says:

    My heart has been heavy lately with all those surrounding me who are very ill. Thank you for sharing this!

    Longing for that BLISS!

  26. 176
    Profbaugh says:

    Just what I needed to hear in a moment when my hope was waning. It’s been a tough month health-wise for me. Thanks for this!

    ~Cheryl

  27. 177
    Maria Cristina says:

    I’m tucking these words inside my journal. As I grow older and witness my own, degenerating, sometime self-inflicted, illnesses and the – even terminal – ones of people I love, I need to be constantly reminded of the beautiful Truth of one day being able to trade these earthly hems for His eternal presence. Thank you for this, Beth. I lift Belinda’s family in prayer.
    maria cristina

  28. 178
    Beth Willis Miller says:

    WOW! How True! How Awesome! How inspiring! He knows this stuff is scary to us…and knowing that He knows is all I need to know…Thank You for sharing your heart with us!
    blessings,
    beth miller

  29. 179
    Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog says:

    Thank you. I needed that. I SO needed that today. Oh the medical tests and trauma I have experienced in my 33 years. It never seems to stop yet I am still here. I have experienced His instant healing, His healing after years of endurance but you are right something else comes along. Unfortunately with me it always seems to be a fight for my health but I love Him so and just want to serve Him. So if it kills me to do it then I will die well in the battle. He is so strong in my weakness and seriously I would not want to the one taking the spotlight anyway. He is so good. He ALWAYS provides the impossible. He is the HEALER. He is the SUSTAINER. He is our EVERYTHING. You are right He does know this is hard. Oh but the harder it is here the more bliss Heaven will be. I cannot wait. But until then we have work to do for Him and His kingdom. Oh that He would even call us into those things. He is amazing.
    Praying for you all.
    Much love,
    Angela

  30. 180
    Marni says:

    “He knows it’s scary to be us”. Amen and amen He does. I was one of those mommies who held my 3 year old’s hand while she went through her cancer treatments. And I cannot tell you the way my fears were quelled knowing that God knew how scared I could get during those times.

    She’s 8 now. She’s a precocious, Jesus-loving, third grader. Our God is beyond what words can describe. But I tell you what…He would have been every bit of what He is, even if He chose to heal her at Home rather than on earth.

    What a beautiful story. My makeup is shot, and I could care less, because I too can’t wait to trade a hem for Him and I rejoice with you, your sweet friend and my sweet friends who went to live in glory because of cancer.

    I love you my sister,

    Marni

  31. 181
    Sandee says:

    Oh Beth…

    You and Melissa hit the nail on the head. I was broken hearted and fearful today….can my God be trusted? I even blogged about my tough questions to him. (http://sandeefamily.blogspot.com/2009/04/heartbroken.html) and you Melissa just voiced it.

    He knows it is scary to be us.

    And He overcame all..

    Thank you, I read today, what I needed to hear.

  32. 182
    ~Trina~ says:

    WOW!

  33. 183
    Anonymous says:

    Thank you for posting this.

  34. 184
    Anonymous says:

    Hi Beth, love reading and just wanted to ask you to pray for another young lady that has cancer and has had a long road. She has a website that I think would be a blessing to all those who have been afficated by cancer in some way. http://www.loveyourguts.com
    Thank you for sharing!!

  35. 185
    Teresa says:

    All at LPM,

    I am new to your blog…and discovered you “accidentally” (isn’t God good?) while searching for audio of Beth’s bible study sessions because I complete them on my own right now and feel like I’m missing out on a piece. Anyway, one thing led to another and here I am…clearly among friends. What I love most about Mrs. Moore…and it has been validated after looking through this blog…is that she is REAL. Bona Fide. Been there. Feet of clay, like the rest of us. It’s so much easier to listen to “straight talk” from someone who has sat in the mud and wiped her tear stained face with muddy hands. Thank you for being willing to be used of God. Your words have brought encouragement to me at such a trying, difficult time…a pit that is half “thrown in” and half “are you kidding me? I really did this to myself on purpose!” I feel that Mrs. Moore would caution me against lifting her up, so let me assure all that I am praising the King of Kings for servants who are willing to say, “Yep…been there.”

    Looking so forward to making friends and hopefully sharing in the giving and receiving of encouragement.

    “Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart and LEAN NOT unto your own understanding. In ALL thy ways ACKNOWLEDGE HIM and He WILL direct thy path” Proverbs 3:5,6 KJV

  36. 186
    Deborah says:

    Around noon on Good Friday a storm blew through Tennessee, not far from here a toronado touched down and took lives and homes. My mother & I were out in the storm at the time. Later I called her and reminded her that when it was so dark here and scary…it was dark that day that Christ took my sins.

    Thank you for your sweet words.

  37. 187
    PinkBoots says:

    wow, He knows. Sitting here in awe of this post…. hem to Him…so much to ponder. GLORY!!!

  38. 188
    thouartloosed says:

    Beth,
    I want it to be enough to grab the hem while I’m here, because that in itself is a blessed miracle. I want to live for the day I hold onto to Him, not just for another day on this planet. Thank you for sharing Belinda’s testimony. It spoke right to my heart and to a question I had festering there.
    Kathy

  39. 189
    katiegfromtennessee says:

    Spiritual Mom Beth, I don’t really know how to articulate what I’m thinking…Melissa is right, I know firsthand that life is brutal; a fallen world, not our home. I also have been reminded now that He knows it is scary to be us-sometimes out of your mind scary. I was laying it all out before Him with tears this morning, sitting in my bed in my jammies with pillows propped up behind me…I’ve never been able to handle living on my own. I have to hold on to that hem very tightly. I want to see HIM. But in the meantime, to live is Christ, to die is gain:) Phil. 1:20 Bless your heart, Spiritual Mom Beth:)

    katiegfromtennessee

  40. 190
    Allie says:

    Thank you so much for sharing these thoughts with us. I have a friend who is battling cancer that was supposed to have taken her home 4 1/2 years ago. She’s not doing real well right now. I needed this reminder that she will get more than a hem of healing one day, and that He does know how scary it is to be her and her family right now. Thank you for being an instrument of His to pass His peace and understanding to us.

  41. 191
    bethany says:

    Thank you for this post Beth. My aunt’s good friend, Dar just passed away from cancer after battling it for 10 or more years. Her story is like Belinda’s but without Christ.
    Please pray for her children Jamie and Andy. They are now without their mom or dad (he died of cancer 8 years ago) and are only 27 and 30.

  42. 192
    Deb says:

    Thank you so much for sharing that story again. Life is so Tough!!! And it is good to be reminded to go after the hem but to also rest in the thought that we may not get it and that is ok because the result will be HIM!

    Just COME LORD JESUS! That is what we all are longing for- whether we know it or not. :0)
    Love and Blessings,
    Deb Wordhouse- Grand Rapids, MI

  43. 193
    Tammy Nischan says:

    I, too, had just read of Belinda in the past few days. I loved your words that we are living “not for another day here, but another day there!” I love that!

    thank you.

    Tammy Nischan

  44. 194
    Donna says:

    Praise God! Praise God! Praise God!
    Waiting for that “SOMEDAY” – Blessed be the name of the LORD!

  45. 195
    Sarah says:

    Beth, My heart is so heavy this week. I feel this huge burden in my heart. My husband and I have been betrayed by our church by someone writing a letter and speaking out about us…I woke up one night crying feeling so terrible and asked God WhY! we trusted these people and then I remembered the betrayal Jesus felt on the cross a million times worse and the Lord saying ” They know not what they have done.” Throughout this experience or any experience people have gone through at least I have my health. Been praying for a lady who just lost her 12 year old to a brain tumor,a lot of my friends battling cancer right now, lost one of my good friends last year to liver cancer she was 43 and left behind 2 children under 5, lost my grandma to cancer, it goes on and on and on.
    Thank you so much for what you wrote, it was indeed a big comfort to me. One day we will join Him and here will be no more sickness, death, sadness and we all will be healed. Hallelujah! Praise the Lord.

  46. 196
    Rhonda says:

    After the very recent breast cancer diagnosis of a wonderful warrior who studies God’s Word with us in our Tuesday Morning Bible Study, your words were an encouragement to me and gave me insight on how I can minister to her as she walks through this scary stuff and seeks the hem of our Master’s Robe.

  47. 197
    jennyhope says:

    As I was reading this again I thought about all of the “Life is Good” brand stuff that everyone wears or puts a sticker on their car stating that. It makes me want to scream at times. LIFE IS HARD!!! Yes the Lord is so good to us but it is hard!!

  48. 198
    remembermejewelry says:

    Dearest Beth-
    Thank you for your tender insight and warm encouragement. A woman from my Bible Study recently asked me where we go immediately following death. I guess I had always thought “to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.” However, upon further Bible Study there seems to be many schools of thought. That we “sleep” until our resurrection at His return. Or is it then that our new immortal bodies are united with our soul/ spirit that had been with Jesus since our death? I trust your sound teaching on Biblical doctrine and would appreciate your thoughts on this. Thank You Beth!
    Shalom-
    all peace, all comfort, all joy, all Him
    Michelle Meade

  49. 199
    Sandra says:

    I am catching up on by “blog” reading and could’t help but comment on this one even though it is late. My father-in-law lost his battle with cancer the day after Beth posted this one.

    It is hard to understand why things work they do but all I can do is trust Him. I am glad my father-in-law isn’t in pain anymore but instead is in the awesome presence of the LORD.

  50. 200
    Amy says:

    I need to hear that word of God from you tonight. That he knows it’s scary to be us. Going thru a minor tough time. I know that the Lord is calling me to believe in a Big Way.Thank you Beth

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